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As a young parent I heard the phrase "relationship over rules." As a young parent I heard the phrase “relationship over rules” as it pertained to parenting.
This idea encouraged me that the whole reason for having a rule or boundary was to protect and love my child. Authoritarian parenting was about me feeling in control, showing up from fear, and/or avoiding doing my own emotional regulation work.
We can also think of ‘relationship over rules’ in terms of our relationship and friendship with ourselves. No matter what, safety and compassion need to come first. Without safety we cannot grow, heal, or learn. And we deserve kindness always, no matter what.
We are always simply practicing – always in progress. And life is always changing. No matter how hard we work or how wonderful our life plans, we'll go through days or seasons when we need to flex and adapt due to illness, lower energetic capacity, or other unexpected circumstances.
This idea of relationship over rules reminds us that our self-imposed rules and boundaries are there to serve us. Not the other way around. So when life doesn't go according to plan, don't tip into judging and criticizing. Be adaptable. Take good care of yourself. Be on your own side, always, no matter what.
Join me for the free Befriend Yourself Workshop, March 24 or 25: https://www.alifeinprogress.ca/befriend-yourself-workshop/
By Krista O'Reilly-Davi-Digui4.8
1818 ratings
As a young parent I heard the phrase "relationship over rules." As a young parent I heard the phrase “relationship over rules” as it pertained to parenting.
This idea encouraged me that the whole reason for having a rule or boundary was to protect and love my child. Authoritarian parenting was about me feeling in control, showing up from fear, and/or avoiding doing my own emotional regulation work.
We can also think of ‘relationship over rules’ in terms of our relationship and friendship with ourselves. No matter what, safety and compassion need to come first. Without safety we cannot grow, heal, or learn. And we deserve kindness always, no matter what.
We are always simply practicing – always in progress. And life is always changing. No matter how hard we work or how wonderful our life plans, we'll go through days or seasons when we need to flex and adapt due to illness, lower energetic capacity, or other unexpected circumstances.
This idea of relationship over rules reminds us that our self-imposed rules and boundaries are there to serve us. Not the other way around. So when life doesn't go according to plan, don't tip into judging and criticizing. Be adaptable. Take good care of yourself. Be on your own side, always, no matter what.
Join me for the free Befriend Yourself Workshop, March 24 or 25: https://www.alifeinprogress.ca/befriend-yourself-workshop/

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