PURPOSESCAPING : Build confidence to reinvent and find purpose in midlife

If you’ve done amazing work in your field and you’ve successfully ‘climbed the ladder” so to speak, eventually you may get near the top or at the top of the ladder, look around and realize that A) there’s nowhere else to climb or B) you’re not interested in limbing any further. At this point, you may decide to pivot and use your talents to do something else.

I work with a lot of burned-out corporate high achievers who have been successful in that space for years, but have finally decided to do something new - sometimes personal development centered, since we often want to heal our own wounds by helping others who were in the place we used to be.

But a common theme I’m noticing is a tendency for high achievers to adopt a mindset from the bottom of the ladder. They decide that since they’re essentially starting over and are new to coaching or running their own business or online marketing or being independent - they mentally put themselves at the bottom of this new ladder.

Sound familiar? If so, stay with me.

I want you to imagine two ladders side by side. How will you get from ladder one (your old path) to ladder two (your new path)?

Your first thought, especially if you're a high achiever, may be to step your way back down all the steps, retracing your steps on all the previous rungs of ladder one, to get to the ground so that you can then climb up the second ladder.

But instead of stepping your way down, I want you to imagine yourself  at the top of ladder one,  reaching your hand out to grab ahold and step over to the top of ladder two. From the top of one ladder, the top of another ladder.

Because you’re not starting from zero.

Your credibility transfers.

We are all a constellation of our career and life experiences, our relationships, our networks, our access and our opportunities.

Instead of thinking of yourself as a newbie, as a beginner, or as an ingenue, I want you to ask yourself how can you put all that you’ve done in the past - all of the past work, all of your relationships, all of your political capital - how can you put all of that to work in service of your new dream?

As Mentioned in the Episode

Thank you to LaQuentin Cathey for Your Rave Review of Package Your Genius:

From Amazon:

LaQuintin Cathey  | 5.0 out of 5 stars  |  "Great book, definitely recommend."

February 3, 2019

As always, Package Your Genius: 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand is available on Amazon - Order Your Personal Branding Bible Package Your Genius Personal Branding Companion Workbook is also available for order - Order Your Personal Branding Workbook

Amber Cabral founded Cabral Co where she helps organizations identify the ways they can shift their behaviors, tactics and mindsets to diversify the culture of the organization. As Amber says, culture is not just about counting heads, it’s about how it feels to work there. Her work helps move the needle on actually having an inclusive, as well as diverse company culture.

It was only when Amber was asked to sit on a diversity council at her job that she uncovered her passion for diversity and inclusion work. Later, when she switched jobs and the diversity council was no longer present, Amber had an aha moment that the diversity work was what actually lit her up about her job.

How does someone end up working in diversity and inclusion? Timing is everything. Before D & I became the career field du jour, Amber knew she wanted to do something, but the opportunities weren’t readily available. Moving to the Fortune 1 Company - Walmart Stores - she took on a major mentoring initiative for the company, which taught her many professional lessons before she exited the company and ultimately, the corporate world completely from an employee standpoint.

In the interview Amber shares how a “voluntold” opportunity put her on the path to a full-fledged consulting company, and how being open to new assignments can open up your career path.

Hear:

• how she built relationships while working remotely

“Always be evolving and be willing to do the work of change.” - Amber Cabral

Amber’s Lessons Learned:

1. You do not have to live the life you've been told to. You get to decide the kind of life and career you want.

2. Always be evolving. Doing something is better than thinking about everything, be open and eager for change.

3. Bring authenticity to every part of your life: relationships, work, family and everything in between. When someone connects to the authenticity in you, it opens up doors you would otherwise have never known existed.

Find Amber online:

Amber’s Website Cabral Co - Cabral Co

Amber on Instagram @BamCabral

Amber on Twitter @BamCabral

Amber on LinkedIn - Amber Cabral

What I’m reading and listening to this week

Golf Home Owners Find Themselves in a Hole  on the WSJ

Three Brothers Launch Eco-Friendly Candle Company - on BlackNews.com

As mentioned in the episode

Last call for Package Your Genius Academy

It’s the last week to apply for this round of Package Your Genius Academy. I’m so excited about the amazing group that’s already coming together for our February 5 start date! Such brilliant minds. Among the current roster, we have a scientific research funding consultant, a therapist in private practice, and a life coach who is pioneering a new coaching style based on her stage time as an actor.

I still have some room for a few more high achievers who have a track record of professional success and need help framing their story, articulating their value to the clients who need them, and becoming more visible through media and speaking.

If you:

• have had some success in one area, but want to make a shift and do something you’ve never done before,

As always, Package Your Genius: 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand is available on Amazon

Package Your Genius Personal Branding Companion Workbook is available on Amazon

What is your life mission? What is your life vision? Why is mission and vision so important? As our guest says, it’s the key to why we should be showing up.

Meico Whitlock specializes in helping purpose driven high achieving professionals find work life balance and carve out a life of meaning. He works with clients on finding balance, eliminating technology distraction and developing personal mission and vision. In his experience, so many professionals are clear on the mission of the organization or clients they’re serving, but they are unclear on their own life personal missions.

Why is that?

For one, Meico says, most of us are suffering from a case of IDD - Intention Deficit Disorder: we’re on autopilot going through life without clear intention of why we’re showing up in the world.

When you lack intention, it’s easy to accept whatever “falls into your lap” - both personally and professionally. So the price is high.

Meico shares a list powerful questions that help get closer to our personal mission and purpose. I found his questions to be thought-provoking and powerful.

1. How can I be of service

2. If you knew that you couldn’t fail, what would you be doing with your life?

Take Advantage of Meico’s Resources:

Meico’s website - Mindful Techie

Download the Free Life Planning Guide

Life Visioning Program Reboot Your Life Course

Meico's Planner - The Intention Planner

What I’m reading and listening to this week

Employers Need to Address Caregiving Crisis Study Finds - WSJ

19 Books to Help You Live Your Best Life - Kailei Carr

Clean up your social media profile and use it to your advantage - WUSA

4 Smart Strategies to Survive a Market Cool-Off - Inc

If Your Friends Don’t Talk About Money , You Need New Friends - Business Insider

As mentioned in the episode

Learn more and apply for Package Your Genius Academy - Apply Here

Package Your Genius: 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand is available on Amazon - My Personal Branding Book

Package Your Genius Personal Branding Companion Workbook is available on Amazon - My Personal Branding Workbook

What is your personal success profile?

Whatever actions, people, places or activities that always make you feel your best shouldn't be optional; they should be non-negotiable aspects of your routine.

Are you prioritizing the source of your magic?

Whatever you’re doing that helps you show up in your very best form, are you intentional about doing that on a daily, weekly  or monthly basis?

I’ve learned over the past few years that we have to prioritize the activities that bring us focus, joy and energy in order to show up as our best selves and therefore reach our most important goals.

I learned the hard way that we have to hold ourselves accountable and meet our own basic requirements if we want to feel fulfilled.

Here's a breakdown of how to do that:

Step 1 - Think about a key activity that brings you joy, energy, and helps you to focus. This is one of your basic requirements for optimal performance.

Note - typically when you’re not able to experience a basic requirement regularly enough, you may feel cranky, overwhelmed, irritated, frustrated, confused or indecisive.

Step 2 - Assess how often you’re experiencing your basic requirement for optimal performance. How often are you doing it or getting it? Are you making it a priority, or are you being like I was and leaving it to chance because you take your ability to access this basic requirement for granted. Be honest.

Step 3 - Make your basic requirement a priority, and put it on your calendar. I’ve started with a daily window for thinking and writing in the morning. My goal is to spend 30 minutes, but as long as I’m doing it regularly, I’m excited to see how the re-introduction of daily writing improved the quality of my life.

Questions to Consider:

What are the key ingredients for your very best day, and for your very best week? For you to show up as your very best self?

What actions evoke the feelings that are priceless to you?

What situations and people evoke the feelings that are priceless to you?

What work would you do for free because the sensation of doing the work is priceless to you and core to your life purpose?

What I’m reading and listening to

Myleik Teele’s MyTaught You Podcast - Marathon Mindset

Burned Out Millennials Need Careers Not Jobs on Bloomberg

Dark Horse - Achieving Success by the Pursuit of Fulfillment - Dark Horse by Todd Rose

Boyhood at 11 and 12: Navigating a social system that prizes alpha males over quirky kids - Washington Post

PYG Episode 39 -  Package Your Childhood Genius - Discovering Passions Early with DJ Connor B

As mentioned in the episode

Learn more and apply for Package Your Genius Academy

Package Your Genius: 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand is available on Amazon

Package Your Genius Personal Branding Companion Workbook is available on Amazon

Throughout time, geniuses have been known for eliminating unnecessary decisions.

Albert Einstein and more recently, Apple Computer founder Steve Jobs adopted a "uniform" to eliminate the daily choice of what to wear.

In doing so, they preserved their mental energy for the projects and breakthrough innovations that mattered most to them.

You don't have to be an Einstein or Jobs to adopt this idea. This is a great time of year to assess what decisions you can eliminate in order to preserve your precious mental energy.

Are too many decisions, clutter or a lack of organization keeping you from full potential? What can you remove in 2019 in order to be more effective?

To help us answer that question, and to give us some New Year strategies to make better decisions, I sat down with Kimberly Boyd Lewis - an executive coach at Evre Little Detail, and a 2018 student of Package Your Genius Academy.

Kimberly started her career as an emergency room social worker, where her ability to quickly make decisions could make the difference between life and death. 

Now as an executive coach, she uses that same decisive authority from her time in social work to help busy executive women cut through the noise, quickly make decisions, and move their lives forward.

Is it time to let go of your old personal brand identity?

I ask because so often we become attached to an outdated narrative that has dominated a definitive period in our lives. 

For example, 

"We never have enough resources to go around, so I need to sacrifice personal comforts to ensure my family's needs are met..."

or 

"I'm not a true leader in my organization yet, so I can't ask for  face time with senior leaders..."

or even 

"Landing clients has historically been difficult for me, so it will probably take months to build up a solid client base..."

But the problem arises when we unknowingly outgrow our prevailing story, and the narrative no longer serves us.

Have you outgrown your old idea of who you are? 

In the months and years since you first devised your current idea of yourself, you've likely evolved.

You may have gotten stronger, more accomplished, more connected, and more respected in your field - yet you're only giving yourself credit for the person you USED to be.

It didn't work then, so what if it doesn’t work now?

I wasn't qualified for the role and was rejected five years ago. What if I’m not as good as I think I am now?

My relationships always seem to fall apart after six months. We're five months in, what if it all falls apart?

These are some of the potential questions that plague us when we’re on the cusp of something new.

But sometimes in the interim, while we’ve been waiting on things to fall apart, they've actually been working out in our favor, and we've been blind to our good fortune.

Sound familiar?

Have you been so tied to your past identity, your past failures and who you used to be that you’ve been asleep to your new reality?

Are you actually ALREADY living the dream you always held for yourself, but instead of celebrating it, you’re living in the past?

It may be time to let go of your old ideas about who you used to be.

Think about the different things on your dream list.

Is what you say you want showing up already for you, but perhaps in a format you didn’t expect?

To be sure, first make a list of what you’ve always said you wanted.

Is that a loving relationship?

A new roster of clients for your own business?

Financial independence?

Next, examine your current reality and be honest with yourself.

Do you already have some of those things on some level? Is there any evidence to support that you already have what you want?

Last, intentionally think through the narrative you can change internally.

As we know, what you focus on will grow.

The new year is the perfect time to explore these ideas.

Join me for episode 60 of Package Your Genius - my first episode of 2019!

https://packageyourgenius.podbean.com/e/ep-60-let-go-of-who-you-used-to-be/

Mentioned in this episode:

Package Your Genius Academy - Apply for January 2019 Cohort http://www.packageyourgeniusacademy.com

Package Your Genius - 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand - http://bit.ly/pygbook

Package Your Genius Companion Personal Branding Workbook - http://bit.ly/pygworkbook

Question 1: What are you willing to let go of? This past year, I removed a ton of clothes and books to make space for more creative projects. Purging helped me to see that I was getting in my own way of reaching my goals.

Question 2: What is one thing that could make everything else work? For me this year, the big thing that made everything else work was writing Package Your Genius

The books I mentioned

Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0804137382/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_bibl_vppi_i0

The One Thing by Gary Keller https://www.the1thing.com

The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0026772QU/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_hsch_vapi_tkin_p1_i0

Question 3: What do you want more of?

Me? I want more travel, adventure, and income - hello 7 figures! I want more support in my home!

Question 4: What do you want less of? Me? I want less administration in my life!

Question 5: What are you grateful for? I am grateful for my family, my relationship, my health and creativity.

As Mentioned in the Episode

Are You in a Money Making Space https://redefiningwealth.podbean.com/e/are-you-in-a-money-making-space/

Tag, You’re It Series on Amazon http://www.connorlittlejohn.com

Package Your Genius - the book http://bit.ly/pygbook and the Companion workbook http://bit.ly/pygworkbook

Package Your Genius Academy http://www.packageyourgeniusacademy.com

As mentioned in the episode:

Download the free PR Planning Worksheet https://app.convertkit.com/landing_pages/12929

Apply for Package Your Genius Academy's Upcoming Cohort http://www.packageyourgeniusacademy.com

Order Package Your Genius 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand on Amazon http://bit.ly/pygbook

Order Package Your Genius Companion Personal Branding Workbook on Amazon http://bit.ly/pygworkbook

Do you understand the opportunity of your personal brand?

Whatever you want more of, you can create through your personal brand. As human beings, we are born to CREATE, so especially if you're in a position where you want to create more revenue in your business or income from your skills outside of your day job, you have everything you need to make that happen.

As mentioned on the episode:

Package Your Genius: 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand is available on Amazon here http://bit.ly/pygbook

Learn more and submit your application for Package Your Genius Academy http://www.packageyourgeniusacademy.com

Have you ever considered that perhaps your perceived weaknesses or flaws are actually what make you special and unique? What if those very traits are not things to destroy, but are the keys to our success? Instead of muting the aspects of ourselves that make others uncomfortable, why not lean in and dial them all the way up?

Get the book - Package Your Genius: 5 Steps to Build Your Most Powerful Personal Brand http://bit.ly/pygbook