Put Into Words

PURPOSE OF THIS EPISODE:

To shed light on navigating the world with insecurities. In this episode a gal pal listener reached out to us and shared that they were bullied for acne in school. They are trying to overcome this harmful belief that they can't date or have meaningful relationships until their skin is clear.

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TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE:

• How Georgie overcame limiting beliefs on feeling unworthy in relationships because of her back acne
• Learning that the love for our skin (and our bodies) doesn't have to be conditional
• How Georgie replaced being worried about reactions or being rejected (because of body acne), with being open to the possibility of acceptance
• You're not tarnished, damaged, or unlovable because of [insert insecurity here]
• Focus on befriending & partnering with your skin - think about being on the same team as your skin
• How do you hold yourself in high regard on bad skin days?
• How do you build respect for yourself and be vulnerable in the dating world with acne?
• Surrender - what would happen if you never had clear skin? Would you be ok?

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ON INSECURITIES:

• Where does insecurity come from?
• Attachment style: Dr. Daniel Siegel, author of Parenting from the Inside Out, says the key to healthy attachment is in the four S's, feeling safe, seen, soothed and secure.
• Insecurities can develop when we are not seen for who we truly are
• Insecurity can manifest in either over confidence /overcompensating OR self depreciation
• Drama Of The Gifted Child by Alice Miller
• Where did we learn there was something "wrong" with this part of our body?
• What messages do we consume/hear/experience that reinforce this?
• In what spaces do we feel free?

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EPISODES MENTIONED THAT YOU MIGHT ALSO ENJOY:

From Over-Exercise To Restorative Movement with Kara Duval

Brené with Sonya Renee Taylor on "The Body is Not an Apology"

Letting Go

Friendship

Hard Conversations

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BOOKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self, Revised Edition

Parenting from the Inside Out: How a Deeper Self-Understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive: 10th Anniversary Edition

The Body Is Not an Apology: The Power of Radical Self-Love

ARTICLES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

https://www.psychalive.org/how-to-overcome-insecurity/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/suffer-the-children/201206/the-drama-the-gifted-child

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CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

This episode was Inspired by a Gal Pal listener, who suggested we unpack resentment. In this episode the gals hope to shed light and reduce the shame around this complicated emotion that everyone experiences.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• Definition of resentment - a feeling of indignant displeasure or persistent ill will at something regarded as a wrong, insult, or injury

• The light and shadow sides of resentment
• It can be an indicator light that we might need to speak up for what we need and expect or confront a situation where we feel like we need an apology or resolution
• How do we move through it?
• Are we allowed to have expectations?
• How do we communicate our needs/expectations

• On forgiveness: "resentment is like taking poison and expecting the other person to get sick"
• Expectations are future resentments
• Is it reasonable to try to not have ANY expectations?
• Being okay with feeling uncomfortable/ disappointed when your expectations aren't met

Examples:

• Keeping score in a relationship
• Feeling bitter about a sacrifice you had to make for someone and continuing to bring it up
• Feeling resentful that you have to be a caregiver for extended periods of time
• Resentment for parents who weren't able to care for you in the way you wanted/needed as a child
• Feeling taken advantage of in a work environment

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EPISODES MENTIONED:

Surrender

Letting Go

Friendship

Hard Conversations

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Don't forget to leave a review for us over on iTunes

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CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

Today the Gals interviewed long-time Gal Pals listener: Alexis Chouery. After Engrid shared over in the Gal Pal Corral, about her own experience with vyvanse and the role it played in her eating disorder and exercise addiction, Alexis reached out and said she had her own story with vyvanse and adderall.

We really wanted to have Alexis on the show because we believe there is value in hearing others experiences. Also vyvanse (similar to adderall and other stimulants) are things we personally don't believe are spoken much about. Even if your story is different from Alexis's we urge you to listen for the similarities not the differences. Also fun fact, in addition to being a long time listener of Gal Pals, Alexis receives personal training from Engrid online.

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If you want to hear Engrid's solo episode where she shares the full story about her experience with vyvanse and the role it played in her eating disorder and exercise addiction - you can listen to it here: LPP #127 Engrid's Vyvanse Addiction Story

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IN THIS EPISODE:

• Alexis shares how she was first diagnosed with Adult ADHD, and how easily she was prescribed Vyvanse
• How this diagnosis brought her peace of mind and made her experience struggling in school, feel acknowledged
• How diagnosis play a role in our identity
• She shares how she first felt while on the medication & how it permanently effected her sleep
• How amphetamines like Vyvanse and Adderall, affect your ability to be fully present
• The stigma she felt around dropping out of University, and attending a community college instead
• "I definitely felt like [attending a] University was the only option for me to be a successful adult"
• The value in finding your learning style and the one-size-fits-all method of teaching
• Her experience with Adderall on-and-off - often wondering "Do I want to be taking this? Is this who I am?"
• The turning point and experience that made her decide to get off of Adderall
• The correlation between stimulants like Vyvanse and Adderall and how they can support for disordered eating behavior
• After getting off both vyvanse and adderall, Alexis shares how she was finally able to establish a life that felt balanced and peaceful
• The pivotal moments and significant people who played a role in her diagnosis and recovery of her experience with vyvanse and adderall
• She shares how this experience shaped and affected her identity? And how her identity has shifted over time

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EPISODES MENTIONED:Gratitude For Failures

Hard Conversations

LPP #127 Engrid's Vyvanse Addiction Story

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Don't forget to leave a review for us over on iTunes

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OTHER EPISODES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

The Balance Of Achievement & Self Acceptance

Perfectionism & Self Sabotage

Letting Go

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CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

In this episode Georgie interviews Engrid about recent success. Engrid shares what stopped her from deciding to give up, doubts she had along the way, and ultimately what made her know it was something she really wanted.

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IN THIS EPISODE:

• How to know what goals to get attached to
• When we get knocked down/fail - how to know if you really want to go back into the arena
• The old stories setbacks can bring up
• The stories we tell ourselves when we encounter a failure/setback
• What helped her move through feelings of doubt?
• Knowing how much is "my best"
• Learning to see the value in asking for help and letting go of needing to "do it all on my own"
• The vulnerability of wanting something that you don't have yet
• Tools that helped her succeed
• Mindset shifts she had to make to reach her goal
• How the final attempt, felt different & what she did differently to prepare herself
• The self awareness required to prepare differently
• The relationship between preparedness and attachment to the outcome
• Overcoming a series of setbacks and ultimately achieving success = confidence!
• Often times when we overcome setbacks, gain experience, and succeed - there is less fear of taking risks towards even bigger goals

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EPISODES MENTIONED:Gratitude For Failures

The Balance Of Achievement & Self Acceptance

Perfectionism & Self Sabotage

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Leave us a review on iTunes

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CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

In this episode the gals host their first ever guest: Kara Duval. Kara teaches pilates, functional movement, and specializes in working with pre/post natal populations. She was named Best Of Boston 2020. She is the creator of The Origin, The Foundation, and Precipice, which are all part of her online movement platform: Range.

Kara says her pilates inspiration comes from her lifelong journey with classical ballet. From Boston Ballet to Texas Christian University, her whole world has revolved around movement. In her words, ballet is strict, yet fluid. Disciplined, yet freeing. To her pilates possesses the same qualities.

After graduating from TCU in 2014 with a BFA in classical ballet, she traded in her pointe shoes for bare feet, and began her formal certification in STOTT PILATES™ at Merrithew Health and Fitness in Toronto, Canada. Though STOTT PILATES™ has always remained her foundation, she is also a trained and certified postpartum exercise specialist, barre instructor, and Titleist Performance Institute trainer.

CONNECT WITH KARA:

Range

Instagram: @karaduvalpilates

Website: karaduvalpilates.com

IN THIS EPISODE:

• How Kara transitioned to training strictly online at the start of Covid
• How her audience blossomed via Instagram live
• The advice her Dad gave her that helped her own her vulnerability
• Common misnomers you see in the fitness industry
• How she uses her sensitivity as a strength
• Why 'sucking in your belly' is not a thing - and is actually anatomically incorrect for creating inter-abdominal pressure and rib cage control
• She values a science based approach for cuing movement, because it is not exclusive
• Her experience with classical ballet, being a fitness instructor, and relationship with over-exercise
• How she used exercise to fill a void in her life
• The connection between over-exercise & over-alcohol consumption
• Going into the fitness industry for the wrong reasons, can be problematic
• How she started in the fitness industry & getting to know herself "Who am I as a mover? As a trainer? What do I have a knack for?
• Her transition from high intensity exercise: spinning, kick boxing etc - to slowing down with pilates
• How slowing down and getting curious gave her to work with pre/post natal and chronic pain population
• Her experience of treating/rehabbing her own body's imbalances to address her own pain
• She shares about her own saying "Breath First, Movement Second"
• Finding the freedom to be able to say 'yes' to things you do want to do, and 'no' to things you don't want to do
• Her take on one of her famous saying "Lean into the mountain" & why she chose to name her online movement platform: Range and her classes: The Foundation, The Origin, & Precipice
• Things she's learned about herself as an instructor during Covid - doing things she would've been to scared to teach in person

QUOTES FROM KARA:

"We don't need to be doing all of the things we think we need to be doing. Your body will give you these little signals, and you can either choose to ignore them or you can address them."

"How can I be the facilitator of really inclusive movement, that means it can be accessible for the people?"

"Finding ways for every single person who chooses to come to my classes, every single person has the ability to move in a way that makes them feel safe and makes them feel connected"

"We have an unhealthy expectation of what we 'health' is...its our job, for our generation, for when we have children, that we make sure there is an equal balance of the joy of movement for the mental and physical benefits, but not the punishment of movement"

"There needs to be a balance of movement and of stillness"

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Don't forget to leave a review for us over on iTunes

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OTHER EPISODES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

Choosing Your Battles

Taking It Personally

Letting Go

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CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

In this second episode of a two-part series, the gals share about how their relationship with money has grown. Be sure to listen to part one of this episode to hear more about the gals' old stories around money, what money represented to them growing up, and how it was modeled to them during childhood.

IN THIS EPISODE THEY DISCUSS:

• When did you feel positive around money?

• What information helped you feel more confident with money?

• Are there any limiting beliefs around money you've become aware of recently?

• Are there any tools you've discovered to help change those?
• How has working for yourself shaped how you view money?

Don't forget to leave a review for us over on iTunes

OTHER EPISODES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

Choosing Your Battles

Taking It Personally

Letting Go

CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

In this first episode of a two part series, the gals unpack their old stories in relationship to money, what money represented to them growing up, and how it was modeled to them during childhood.

IN THIS EPISODE THEY DISCUSS:

• What were you told about money as a child? How did your parents talk about money?
• How was wealth perceived as a child?
• How easy was it for you to get what you needed?
• What was your relationship with saving? Spending?
• What & when was your first job?
• Did your parents use money as a tool of control?

Don't forget to leave a review for us over on iTunes

OTHER EPISODES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

Choosing Your Battles

Taking It Personally

Letting Go

CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

The gals are unpacking the idea of how to pick your battles.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• How do you choose what situations are worth confrontation?
• They each share times when they chose to speak up and times when they chose to let it go
• They share past experiences where they overshot and were either too confrontational or too passive
• How to know the sweet spot?
• And share process that helped them

IF YOU ENJOYED THIS EPISODE YOU MIGHT ALSO ENJOY:

Jealousy

Perfectionism & Self Sabotage

From Exercise Addiction to Joyful Movement

CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

CONNECT WITH USInstagram Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRIDInstagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIEInstagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

If you have ever had a failure that ended up turning out for the best, pop over into the Gal Pal Corral and share it with us.

Purpose of this episode:

To reframe failure and share perspectives on how perceived failures can actually give us what we didn't even know we wanted.

Song: "Thank you, next" by Ariana Grande

Quote: I'm so thankful that i didn't end up with what I thought I wanted

Big questions:

• Do you believe in fate?
• Do you believe that some things are destiny?
• Are we ever really "off track"?
• Does the universe/god/spirit redirect us?
• Feather, Brick, Truck (messages)

Types of setbacks that feel like failures at the time:

• Breakups
• Growing apart in a friendship
• Being fired
• Losing a client
• Failing a test / not passing a class
• Not getting the job
• Setting a boundary and not having it honored
• A mental or physical health diagnosis
• A learning disability
• A physical disability / injury
• Reckoning with an addiction

The gals share some of the biggest setbacks they've had over the last 5 years?

Mantras that help move through a setback

• What's meant for me won't pass me by
• I'm attracting the right opportunities for my highest good
• Something even better is on it's way
• I can be disappointed and grateful at the same time
• I expect good things
• Good things are coming my way
• I'm excited for what's next
• I trust that this experience is preparing me for what's to come

Join the Gal Pal Corral

Hear more about our experiences with failures that turned out for the best

One of the 4 agreements "Don't take anything personally."

Al-Anon: QTIP (quit taking it personally)

CONNECT WITH US

Instagram

Join: Gal Pal Corral

ENGRID

Instagram: @livengproof

Liveng Proof Podcast

Website

GEORGIE

Instagram: @georgiemorley

The Chasing Joy Podcast

Website

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Other Gal Pal Episodes You Might Also Like:

Receiving feedback

Giving Feedback

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Why is it so hard not to take something personally?!

• Everything feels personal because you are experiencing life through your own lens
• When you're empathetic/sensitive and/or codependent this can be extra heightened
• We crave love and validation - it's not wrong or a flaw for us to want to be loved
• Depends on how much this was modeled/emphasized by our primary caretakers
• Codependent tendencies of wanting to people please in order to be accepted and liked (to belong to the group = survival) - - so when we receive criticism our primal brain can perceive this as a threat to our survival

Filtering Negativity/Criticism

Brene Brown talks about how to filter criticism

• Reject it if the person is just on the sidelines (trolls)
• Tune out if it's extreme negative or extreme positive
• Pay attention when it's someone who knows you well and cares about you

Be Aware of the areas you're extra sensitive - awareness can help you filter reality through feelings

When something happens in one of those areas you can think "That really stings, AND I also know that when something happens in that area of my life it usually stings more than other areas"

Arenas where we're sensitive:

Georgie:

• Work, creative work, photography
• My body
• My intelligence

Fear of criticism used to stop me from trying - now the more I practice moving through those feelings the less afraid I am to fail and try something new

Engrid:

• My appearance/body
• My work as a trainer, my income, and my certifications/title
• My failures
• My performance (tests, presentations, Bootcamp's etc)

Tools for taking things less personally:

• Letting things sting without needing to do anything about it
  • People will be rude, weird, say thing that hurt you
  • It's ok to be hurt, the first step is feeling it without needing to control the other person
• Realizing that the other person is usually in their own world and it's usually something to do with them
  • "This isn't about me"
  • There's almost more to the story you don't know
• Connect with your truth
  • Do I like what I'm doing? (with creative work)
  • Is there a part of this I can take responsibility for?
  • Is there something deeper that this is triggering? In me? In the other person
• Talking it out with a safe friend
  • They can help you see the bigger picture
• Giving it time
• Getting older (gaining more experience with recognizing how others respond has less to do with you)
• Practicing not letting it stop you
• If you feel hurt, but keep doing your thing you will build up emotional muscle memory that criticism or rude comments/situations won't stop you