Real Recovery Talk

"In every single way, my sobriety has become a blessing for me." -Sean, Rock Recovery Center

I have a guest today, Sean, who is from Long Island, New York. He came to our recovery center eight years ago for thirty days and decided to become a resident of Florida. We talk about Sean's stage character, how he dropped his walls, and his process of recovery.

Two days before he came to Rock Recovery Center, Sean remembers "almost drinking myself to death. Everything was dark in my life. I didn't see a way out, and 99% of my thinking had to involve some sort of alcohol. I was losing my health, my wife and children, borderline diabetes with more than 120 pounds extra weight." He was Baker Acted after police came to his house because they received a call and thought he was going to hurt himself.

When he returned from the hospital, he talked with his wife. In this conversation, he was yelling at her, then had a moment of clarity. The next day, he told his wife he needed help. Although he realized he needed help, he was adamant about not participating in a 12 Step Program as he didn't think it would work for him. When Sean landed in Florida for his first day of recovery, he felt he would erase over two decades of drinking in 29 days.

In his first AA meeting, he didn't let any of the conversations in his head. He was 100% sure that this program wouldn't work for him. He created a calendar with 29 days to cross off until he went home. At the time he had six "x" marks on his calendar, he understood the fellowship of AA. "The lower your bottom, the higher your hope." He heard others who had much worse situations with addiction tell their stories of hope. "They were talking about how wonderful and amazing their lives were. If they could do it, I could do it! That little mustard seed of hope, that little bit of open-mindedness cracked open. Once it cracked open, it was off to the races."

Listen in to find out how Sean realized he had a problem with alcohol, why he owes a debt of gratitude to the friend who told his wife details about his alcoholism, and why he thought he could "think his way through this" because of his education as a health coach. Learn how Sean views his recovery process today, how he came to the realization that he had to let the program process "in," and why prayer has made a significant difference in his life.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.

• Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

• [04:34] Sean's story of how and why he came to Rock Recovery Center.
• [07:34] What woke Sean up to his reality was a "look" he got from his then wife.
• [09:29] His first day of recovery at Rock Recovery Center.
• [11:33] Ben talks about his witness with Sean's process.
• [13:30] Sean says, "I was without a doubt, a polished up garbage can."
• [18:18] He saw the pain and sadness in his wife's eyes.
• [20:55] The key people in his life that influenced Sean to go to recovery.
• [22:55] For twenty years he tried to break the cycle of alcoholism on his own.
• [24:32] What factors changed Sean to stop drinking and how he views his recovery process today.
• [25:33] The day he decided to start praying, he has prayed everyday since and hasn't missed a day.
• [27:06] His experience in outpatient treatment after his inpatient time at the recovery center.
• [33:23] When Sean realized his new "normal" in his life.
• [37:27] How the community we build around us will directly affect your level of success.
• [41:10] Sean getting in with the "old timers" who had been sober for many years.
• [45:08] His old company rehires him and he was able to stay away from alcohol on the job and how his sobriety has made him stronger.
• [48:58] "There's a lot of respect for my sobriety" with people who drink.
• [51:14] His post recovery relationship with his children and his family.
• [53:42] How he recovered his relationship with his sister.
• [55:43] "You never know what meeting is going to change your life."

Episode Links and Resources

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
• Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

Set some friggin boundaries please

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I can't tell you how many phone calls I get from parents that don't know what to do with her addict son or daughter, a good place to start is setting some boundaries.

Having a loved one with addiction problems can be a very stressful situation. Often times we try and navigate this path on our own and think that we know what's best for our loved one. When we can understand that we do not know what's best for them and we can finally reach out for help is when the real healing starts to happen. There are many situations in which we can handle addiction and it can be different for everybody given different circumstances.

Most importantly we need to be able to ask for help and recognize that we don't know what's best and be OK with that

I have a guest today, Maggie, from Pittsburgh, who has come forward to share her story with us. This is the third time she has been in recovery from alcoholism and is going to tell her story of her past, her present, and where she plans on taking her life in the future.

Maggie is in our program at Rock Recovery Center. She is 25 years old and started drinking 13 years ago as a result of trying to keep up with her two older brothers. The crack head down the street would go and buy them alcohol in exchange for watching her child when she was gone. Since their parents were out working a lot, her friends and her brothers' friends would come over to their house and party after school in their backyard pool. They would clean up their mess and then go to a park or another location to continue to party.

She started high school at a Catholic High School, failed 9th grade. Her parents moved to a better area of Pennsylvania, and she was in a new school that was bigger than her old school. In the IMPACT program and not knowing any students in her new school, Maggie gravitated towards the "druggie kids" as they were her classmates. Maggie started doing several different types of drugs when she started going to RAVE clubs. She then got into a car accident, flew through the windshield, and was hospitalized with reconstructive surgery to her face.

After high school, she became a bartender and started doing cocaine and Adderall to keep going throughout the day. She was hardly sleeping and felt that she was cool because she was only 18 but was able to be at the bar all day and night. At 21, she was drinking all night and ended up in a stranger's bed. Her friends were concerned with her safety. She realized at this point that she had a problem.

Listen in to find out why she mixed Adderall, cocaine, and alcohol to get through her day, how she had blackouts and would sleep with strangers, and why she always had to drink alcohol, even while studying for college. Learn how Maggie broke down and finally called a rehab, how she had an affair with a male married nurse at another facility, and what led to Maggie's relapse after her first rehab.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.

• Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

• [04:22] Maggie shares her story of her past and how she became alcoholic.
• [07:47] Her Catholic high school and her friend groups in school.
• [09:59] She started drinking and smoking weed at 12 years of age.
• [11:54] How Maggie started going to RAVE clubs and doing drugs.
• [15:02] Her parents were in denial of the situation.
• [19:17] Maggie, at age 21, would end up drinking and ending up in a stranger's bed.
• [22:40] She decided to go to school full-time as a paralegal.
• [24:58] Her transition from bartender to full-time paralegal.
• [26:56] The first time Maggie sought treatment and her experience.
• [31:34] Maggie's first sponsor for her first outpatient.
• [34:47] Her bouts with depression, how she felt unsettled again.
• [38:23] How Maggie came to Real Rock Recovery Center.
• [42:49] Differences between her home rehab and Florida rehab.
• [47:05] What Maggie thinks about her new sober lifestyle.
• [49:47] How Maggie sees her new future in Florida.
• [52:01] Why working for her sobriety makes a significant difference in her recovery.

Episode Links and Resources

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
• Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

Ben and I have two guests today who are sharing their experience with their current recovery experience concerning their past recovery experiences. We will talk to Dakota and Chris about what had impacted them from when they started their sobriety journey to where their journey is taking them in the future. My guests will also talk about how their hard work has paid off, and benefits sobriety has brought to their lives.

Dakota was addicted to heroin and has been sober for a year at the end of May. Chris is 21 years old, has been to nine treatment centers. His addiction was cocaine, and he has been sober for eight months. Both men have been to multiple treatment centers to achieve sobriety.

Dakota woke up one day at age 19 and didn't want to live anymore. "That feeling that I had inside that I didn't want to live anymore is the worst bottom I've ever had." Originally going to treatment to get off opiates, Dakota still planned on drinking and smoking marijuana. He watched his situation worsen over time. "I had to get beaten down so bad that I became willing to do whatever it took to stay sober off everything." He didn't understand the steps he had to take to get sober. After several years of treatment, Dakota realized that he would have to go entirely off all drugs to be successful in his treatment.

Chris has been through three previous treatment centers and is 30 years of age. A drug user since the age of 15, with the most substantial amount of clean time at seven months, much of that time being spent in jail. He pushed everyone out of his life as he only wanted to be with drugs and alcohol. "I basically messed up my life so bad, I lost about everything, I was barely holding on to a job." In 2018 he decided that drugs and alcohol were a problem. He felt bankrupt not only financially but emotionally and spiritually. In his first attempt at Rock Recovery, he relapsed after 45 days, drank for three days straight. This confirmed to Chris his problem with alcoholism.

Listen in to find out how being alcoholic can become a habit, why Chris felt his alcoholism was on auto-pilot, why having positive habits is a vital ingredient to sobriety. Learn why addicts can't just stop doing drugs and alcohol, the struggles Chris and Dakota have faced in their recovery and how hard both clients have had to fight to become sober.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.

• Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

• [04:32] Dakota shares his previous treatment center experiences.
• [07:20] See link below to hear Dakota's entire story on episode 80.
• [11:40] Chris talks about his addiction and relapse experience.
• [14:06] He decides he is an alcoholic after a three-day relapse spent drinking.
• [16:18] Chris didn't know what to do when he was done work, so he chose to drink.
• [17:47] Find out why addicts can't "just stop doing drugs and alcohol".
• [21:37] Advice Dakota gives to others who are starting their journey to sobriety.
• [25:27] How he has gotten through rough times, especially with COVID-19
• [26:30] How Chris' situation is different for him now that he is sober.
• [27:48] Why having a sober support community has impacted both clients' sobriety.
• [29:24] Helping other addicts helps those with addiction stay sober.

Episode Links and Resources

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
• Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]
• Listen to Dakota tell his story in Episode 80

Ben and I have a guest with us today who is a patient at Rock Recovery Center. Mathew K, our special guest, shares his history and experience with recovery from alcohol addiction. Matt has been in several different types of treatment several times over the past five years. We discuss Matt's past wins, mistakes, and his past history related to his addiction.

Currently, in his mid-30's, he started drinking at age 14 and his first use of drugs at age 15. His earliest childhood memories at the age of five were of a work-oriented father who wasn't present and gave Matt constant negative feedback and a mother who was giving. Several times his father would come home drunk and have arguments with his mom, which is the reason Matt remembers feelings of being protective of his mother. He played several sports and remembered his grandparents watching his games. School was a safe place for Matt as he was an outstanding athlete and received good grades, until his junior year in high school.

When drinking, Matt felt that he was free, and his state of being drunk made the world feel like it was slowing down. His alcoholism progressed with his junior and senior years when he quit sports, found a job, and bought a car. Additionally, he was friends with many of the cheerleaders and sports jocks who liked to throw parties. Known as "the party guy," he held parties on his property as his parents had a large property with land, which he would host parties on frequently.

By the time he was out of high school, he had identified with being the bartender. He would boast he could "drink like his dad." Like a badge of honor, this was a sense of accomplishment and entrance into manhood. He was continually trying to "one-up" himself drinking.

He realized at the age of 25 that he had become an alcoholic. Even though his friends pointed out he had become alcoholic, he would respond with "alcoholics go to meetings." About four years ago, he had to time out how often he needed to drink so he wouldn't get the shakes. Matt avoided drinking during his workday as a pizza delivery associate because he didn't want to be drunk and kill someone drunk driving.

His drinking, bad eating habits, and smoking ended him up in the hospital with pancreatitis at the age of 30. Since then, he has been hospitalized 15 times for pancreatitis. His liver and pancreas are so weakened that he will die from pancreatitis or liver shutdown if he continues to drink.

Listen in to find out when Matt sought out treatment for alcoholism, his residential rehab experiences, and the different programs he went through during the past five years. Learn why he couldn't stand to be in his first treatment program, and what his criteria are for being successful at a rehabilitation clinic.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.

• Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

• [05:34] Matt shares his history of addiction with Ben and I.
• [09:32] How Matt reacted and dealt with his dad's drinking at a very young age.
• [11:44] Alcoholism paving the way for Matt to have trauma related to his dad's drinking.
• [13:06] Neurological aspects of alcohol addiction.
• [14:18] Matt's first experience getting drunk involved eating pizza with cigarettes on top.
• [18:34] His road to alcoholism starting in his junior year of high school.
• [19:33] When Matt did eight shots twice, then kept drinking and blacked out in the snow.
• [23:14] Upholding drinking as a badge of honor, this was a sense of accomplishment and entrance into manhood.
• [24:15] When Matt realized he had become an alcoholic.
• [26:30] The reason he went into treatment was because he had pancreatitis.
• [29:41] Why Matt has been hospitalized 15 times in five years.
• [32:01] Matt's attempt at drinking with attempted moderation after being diagnosed and told he would die if he continued to drink.
• [35:24] Ben's professional opinion on 30 days of treatment for addiction.
• [40:20] Why Matt had to fall flat multiple times to keep himself in treatment.
• [41:30] Matt's criteria for a rehabilitation clinic.
• [46:09] The importance of a geographical change when getting sober.
• [50:27] This is the longest period since his teens that Matt has been sober.
• [52:44] Ben discusses the positive aspects of recovery far away from home.
• [55:12] Sobriety support in the "Recovery Capital of the World".
• [58:16] Taking pride in your sobriety.
• [61:13] Drivers for addicts to become sober.

Episode Links and Resources

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
• Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]
• Brene Brown and Vulnerability
• Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Ben and I both share the same birthday - April 7th, 1984, with Ben just a few hours older than me!

COVID update from South Florida, as we are starting to get to the height of the Coronavirus. Professionals are currently predicting April 16th as the peak time for COVID in Florida. We are continuing our support for our clients with changes as necessary to prevent the spread of Coronavirus.

We are both predicting addiction rates increasing because of the economic downturn and lack of work available. Social media news outlets are influencing people around the world. I believe that we are going to look at how much we depend on the media after COVID passes.

Returning Home Post Treatment

"Set yourself up for success where you are at today, not where you think you're going to be tomorrow."

• Ben Rock Recovery Center

Your loved one may have returned home from treatment. Especially during the outbreak, people are stressed and can easily fall back into relapse. Make sure to encourage your loved one or yourself to call for help when you feel you need assistance before you are in dire straits. Prevent yourself from getting into an old negative pattern you don't want to experience again in your life.

No matter where you go for treatment, you will most likely take more than one attempt to recover. This does not mean you can't recover in one attempt. To improve in one attempt, "all the seeds need to plant and grow."

While Ben needed multiple attempts to recover, I was able to be clean after one treatment, however; I was able to make all the seeds grow. Mainly to learn to cope with the underlying issues which pushed me into using drugs and alcohol.

Listen in to find out Ben's experience with multiple times trying to recover from addiction, why people don't want to identify as a drug addict, and why people are not aware of challenges when they get back home after recovery. Learn why you will fail 100% of the time if you are not into the treatment process and learn the components to make your recovery work.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.

• Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

• [03:05] South Florida COVID update and peak time prediction.
• [05:50] How social media is influencing people around the world.
• [08:49] Pick up the phone and reach out for support when you need to without guilt.
• [10:02] Ben's experiences post-treatment with several tries detoxing.
• [11:21] My experience with treatment and why I could successfully treat one time.
• [13:04] Why people don't want to identify as a current or past addict.
• [16:05] Spouse and marriages, addiction and divorce.
• [17:35] Why you should do as much as possible during treatment.
• [20:30] Ben's favorite recovery quote.
• [23:30] Focusing and understanding that recovery is up to the individual and learning from failure.
• [26:31] What happens when people come back to recovery the second time.
• [30:24] Negative habits of drug addiction, please take the initiative and call and reach out for assistance!

Episode Links and Resources

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
• Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]
• Brene Brown and Vulnerability
• Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Here we are, chatting outside in the beautiful Florida weather, with Real Recovery Talk! COVID-19 has affected so many aspects of our lives, including how Ben and I record our podcasts. We are doing our best to provide recovery at Rock Recovery Center, along with abiding by all state, federal, and local guidelines regarding patient care and the COVID virus.

Many people are struggling with the decision to put their loved one on a plane to send them to recovery. They are worried their family member could contract COVID. What many people don't realize is that if you have a family member who is addicted to drugs, the drugs are more likely to kill them than the COVID virus in many cases. Waiting one day too many to send your loved one to recovery could be the difference between survival and death.

Drug addicts use drugs and alcohol to cope with stressful situations, especially in cases like we are seeing recently. We believe that the use of drugs and alcohol during recent weeks is continuing to escalate because we are in a stressful environment.

We believe that many addicts are being cut off from their addiction source, starting to go through withdrawal and deciding to come to treatment. Additionally, there are over 14,000 methadone patients in New York who cannot currently get their methadone treatment. MAT programs can have many downfalls, the lack of medication in situations such as we are going through at the moment is just one of the downfalls of MAT programs.

Listen in to find out Ben's experience with methadone treatment, methadone's horrible physical and mental withdrawal symptoms, and why we practice abstinence-based recovery and treatment. Find out why you can still look at the positive side of our current situation, why you can take this time to better yourself and your life and what you can do now to ensure you come out better when this situation is over.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.

• Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

• [02:39] How COVID is affecting our podcast, our lives and our recovery center.
• [03:50] Modifications in client care as a result of protection against Coronavirus.
• [05:49] Waiting one more day to send your loved one to recovery can be the difference between survival and death.
• [08:43] How many of the recovery and addiction groups in South Florida have adapted their meetings because of the COVID outbreak.
• [12:21] The lack of methadone treatment in New York and throughout the country.
• [15:35] Negative effects and downfalls of the MAT program.
• [17:55] Charlie's experience with the methadone when he was in recovery.
• [22:35] Steps Ben and I are taking in our long-term sobriety to continue to be sober.
• [26:30] Ben's pros and cons of the current situation.
• [29:02] Activities you can still take part in, even if your gym is closed.
• [30:12] COVID-19 is not a reason to not give your loved ones a chance at recovery.

Episode Links and Resources

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
• Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]
• Brene Brown and Vulnerability
• Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Ben and I are driving and podcasting at the same time today, we are here having our car chat and recording this episode.

Have you considered an addict that you need to be managed? This is a hard proposition to accept, as we want to feel in control of our lives. Much of the management is in the context of timelines and includes goals. Ultimately, you and your mentor wish to get to the same place in your recovery; however, the path you choose may not be your best option. Let your mentor or another professional help you choose the best path to your goal.

Managing your case involves setting expectations, not dictating our client's every move. We want you to have the freedom and move forward in your healing process. Your case consists of the consideration of your input and discussion with a professional at our center. We will give you the reasons why individual decisions and input are positive or why we think a particular choice is not in your best interest.

One case we focus on in this episode is a client who has been in recovery seven times. When asked why he had been in recovery seven times, he replied: "Well, because I have felt it's my duty to get back to my mom who is struggling and having a hard time making ends meet." Allowing our new client to be a part of the process and listening to his input, we can better serve him and refocus his journey to be successful.

A second case example is a woman who is in our program. She wanted a pass to hang out with her new boyfriend, who lives close to the center before she started treatment. Trust has not been earned yet, as this relationship has not been developed. Both parties must spend time together to learn to trust the relationship.

Listen in to find out why you should have an upfront contract when you start your recovery, what having input into your treatment looks like and sounds like in a conversation and why reconsidering to do an activity at a later time is essential to your full recovery.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.

• Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

• [02:54] Who needs to be managed and what does that mean?
• [05:07] A case example of a client who doesn't want to be managed.
• [07:15] The importance of validating expectations.
• [09:07] Building a treatment plan around the client's input and perspective.
• [10:40] Why one of our clients has been in recovery seven times.
• [12:23] Intensive outpatient and how this part of recovery can support you and keep you on the right track.
• [13:54] The importance of having an upfront contract when you begin recovery.
• [16:41] Trust is tested to the max in the treatment process as the client needs to give some of their freedoms to create a successful recovery.
• [18:17] Best mindsets for people to have as a client and family of a client.
• [20:22] Expectations of clients depending on previous experience.
• [22:41] Understand when you seek out a treatment facility that certain aspects of your life will be managed.

Links and Resources:

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
• Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]
• Brene Brown and Vulnerability
• Futures Recovery Healthcare Center

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Let's find out what the five stages of change are and how you could be enabling your loved one to stay addicted to drugs and alcohol. Addicts can transfer from one stage to another daily. There are many different factors in the addict's life, which will play into what stage the addict is currently experiencing. This episode is not only for those who are addicted but for the loved ones, friends, and family who have a role in the addict's life.

Stage #1: Precontemplation Stage

The addict is clueless about their behavior, how their behavior affects others around them and is perplexed about why the people around them are responding to them in the manner in which they see. The addict does not even register that they have an issue and will usually give excuses about their behavior or think their behavior is in the normal range of socially acceptable behavior.

Stage #2: Contemplation Stage

The addicts look at their behavior and think their possibly could be a problem with their behavior. They may see room for change. However, they aren't ready to make that change at this stage. The addict can start to see a daily pattern in their addiction. The person isn't convinced they have a problem when they are going through this stage.

Stage #3: Understanding the Problem

For drug addicts and alcoholics to get to this stage can take multiple years of the same destructive behavior day after day to recognize that this behavior is a problem. They realize their tolerance to drugs, alcohol has increased, and their problem is affecting their work and family life. Poor habits such as not eating, not sleeping, or not bathing are regular daily choices. Health is on the decline, and they understand this behavior is negatively affecting them. At this stage, they know they have a problem and see the evidence of their behavior.

Stage #4: Action Stage

At this stage, the addict realizes they have an issue and start to make changes. They may realize they need to check themselves into treatment or start to attend a support group. At this point, the addict needs support, as this stage takes a large amount of willpower. The addict will start to understand the reason behind their addiction. Next, they can attend therapy to work through the healing process. For the family member, you now have the opportunity to learn about addiction and how to properly support your child or family member in their newfound recovery.

Stage #5: Maintenance Stage

Find support groups, mentors, and others who will positively support you and your family. This stage can last for years and does not have a specific stopping point in your life. You may find a therapist who you trust and rely on to help you through your healing journey.

Listen in to find out why you need to draw boundaries around addicts and how boundaries can move the addict through to the fourth and fifth stages of recovery. Find out why it's so important to learn about addiction and why you should find others who are in a similar position to you to learn from them what to expect and how you can support your child or loved one.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

• [04:33] Addictive habits including eating, power-lifting, drugs and alcohol.
• [06:38] Stage #1, the Precontemplation stage explained.
• [07:55] Stage #2, Contemplation stage and the behavior of the addict in this stage.
• [10:10] Stage #3, Understanding the problem and how the addict comes to this point.
• [13:50] Addicts can move through one or more of these stages on the same day.
• [16:13] Ways parents, friends and family members enable drug and alcohol addicts.
• [18:28] How enabling addicts to be able to function is negatively impacting their route to recovery.
• [20:10] Stage #4, the Action Stage where the behavior change starts.
• [24:04] Learn how you can support your loved one through their Action Stage.
• [25:07] Stage #5, the Maintenance Stage will last for a long time and usually involve support groups and mentors.
• [26:37] The Relapse Stage and why people relapse back into addictive behavior.
• [29:37] Contact us with questions or comments if you or a loved one need help!

Links and Resources:

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
• Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Ben is hosting our show today with our guest Johnny, a recovered alcoholic and drug addict and part of the team at Futures Recovery Health Care in Jupiter, Florida.

Johnny grew up in a financially stable household and was a very privileged child, attended prep school, and expected people to always tell him he was brilliant. He graduated from college and landed a great job in Washington DC, making great money for his age at 21. He soon fell into cocaine addiction and was the life of the party until this came to an end when he became homeless.

He found himself out on the streets in Phoenix, Arizona. Johnny liked hanging out with people who were making fun of others because "we were better than them." Out of control and in with the wrong crowd, "I realized I violated every type of value I had: physical, emotional, and sexual." His life became a catch 22 of doing anything for money to get drugs, then needing to take drugs to forget about the action he had just received. This series of recurring events took Johnny to a place "where I had no hope."

His distorted perception of body dysmorphia, along with the belief his parents instilled in having to be the best at both being an athlete and student, led him to have unrealistic standards for himself. Now, Johnny always needed to feel connected to a group. Looking back, he realized how much of a puppet he had become.

By August 16th, 2007, Johnny had been through five treatment centers and didn't realize how much he was hurting his family, as well as himself. Johnny decidedly made a choice to not put a mind-altering substance in his body again.

Listen in to find out Johnny's struggles with God, how he reconnected to God, and how Johnny continued to lie and struggle before he found a sponsor. Find out how his past actions when he was addicted caught up to him in the form of federal prison several years later. Learn how Johnny used this opportunity for 35 months to help other prisoners become sober and straight.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page.

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Show Notes:

• [01:28] Johnny tells his story of how he fell into addiction.
• [05:06] You can't outthink drug and alcohol addiction once addiction gets a hold of you.
• [05:28] Johnny talks about the void which drugs and alcohol filled for him.
• [08:14] August 15th, 2007, Johnny had been through five treatment centers
• [09:53] Johnny and his belief and disbelief in God.
• [11:35] Taking a look at sobriety and abstinence.
• [13:02] Johnny's past catching up with him five years after his actions.
• [16:48] Looking at the impact of drug and alcohol abuse on family and others around you.
• [17:57] Patrick, a counselor in Lima, PA, helped Johnny unload his fears and move through the process of healing.
• [19:30] Brene Brown and the courage to be vulnerable.
• [21:29] Sharing and the role of sharing in the process of healing and relations theory.
• [23:00] Three types of recovery programs at Futures Recovery Healthcare Center.
• [27:40] Working with people who cannot show weakness.
• [31:02] The experiential process, hands on, working with recovering addicts one-on-one.
• [34:30] Johnny's daily thinking process and mindset as he moves through daily life.

Links and Resources:

• Real Recovery Live Chat
• Real Recovery Talk on the Web
• Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
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• Rock Recovery Center
• Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
• Ideas for a show? Email us [email protected] and [email protected]
• Brene Brown and Vulnerability
• Futures Recovery Healthcare Center