Have you let yourself go or perhaps lost yourself in your marriage? Today's episode will help you find yourself again. A listener struggles with finding the motivation to find herself again, having let herself go, and seeks advice on how to rediscover who she is in her marriage. This episode originally aired in Dec. 2024 and was one of our highest rated episodes that season.

Listen in for encouragement, practical steps, and a simple 4-week blueprint I share to help you reignite your spark and your sense of self-worth in and out of your relationship.

Learn more at https://danache.com. 

 

Have a relationship or marriage question for the show? 

Email or send a DM on Instagram. 

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Infidelity is one of the most heart-shattering experiences anyone can endure in a marriage. It shakes the bedrock of trust and can leave spouses grappling with pain, betrayal, confusion, and fear for the future. If you’re reading this, you may be right in the middle of this storm—or you know someone who is. Take heart: your story is not over, and healing truly is possible.

We’re bringing our “Healing After Infidelity” series to a close with an empowering message and a transformative resource for those walking the difficult road of recovery. In this episode, I unpack both the challenges and opportunities that arise after infidelity and introduce my comprehensive online course, “Infidelity Intensive.” Here’s what you need to know if you’re trying to rebuild after betrayal.

 

Learn more at danache.com/infidelityintensive. 

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Have you ever felt like you are the only one putting in the work, or maybe you're putting in a significantly more amount of work than your spouse is? That can feel very unjust. It can feel unfair, and most of us get tired of doing that. We have a question that I think all of us can probably relate to at some point: What if I'm doing more work on my marriage than my spouse?

Key Takeaways:

1. Change Your Step:
   Alter your approach in the relationship. When you change how you respond, your spouse will also have to adjust, breaking unhelpful cycles.

2. Be Patient:
   Trust takes time to rebuild—don’t expect overnight results. Your consistency over time demonstrates commitment.

3. Play the Long Game:
   Rebuilding a relationship is a marathon, not a sprint. Focus on progress, not perfection.

4. Fix Your Focus:
   What you focus on grows. Shift your attention from what your spouse isn’t doing to the positive changes you’re making and what you want for your marriage.

Featured Resource:

Infidelity Intensive—a step-by-step online course designed to move couples from pain to restoration after betrayal. Learn more at danache.com/infidelityintensive.

Submit Your Questions:
Have a question for Dana? Reach out here or DM on Instagram @mrsdanache.

Thanks for listening!
If you found today’s advice helpful, share this episode with a friend and leave a review. 

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Can an emotional affair be just as damaging as a physical one? Research says yes. Yet, the topic of emotional affairs is complex because of their impact on the psyche and the marriage. This episode (a sweet repeat of ep. 284) focuses on understanding, prevention, and healing, providing valuable insights for couples navigating this challenging terrain.

Key Highlights:

• Defining Emotional Affairs: What constitutes an emotional affair? We emphasize the need to clearly distinguish between emotional and physical affairs.

• Recognizing the Signs: Learn to identify the indicators of an emotional affair, such as inappropriate emotional investment or intimate sharing with someone outside your marriage.

• Research Insights: Research suggests that women are more likely to engage in emotional affairs. And other kinds of vulnerable people. 

• The Role of Disconnection: Discover how disconnection within a marriage can lead to emotional affairs, often occurring in workplaces or through digital channels, where individuals present idealized versions of themselves.

• Normalizing Terms: We're critiquing casual terms like "work wife" that could normalize inappropriate emotional connections.

• Rebuilding Trust: For those who have experienced an emotional affair, we outline four crucial steps for rebuilding trust, emphasizing the importance of severing ties, honest communication, self-reflection, and establishing boundaries.

• Setting Boundaries: We discuss three boundary guidelines designed to prevent future issues.

• Cooperating in Rebuilding: Not all relationships may be able to withstand the impact of an emotional affair. Will yours?

Take Action:

• Get my brand-new course, Infidelity Intensive, a restoration roadmap for healing after infidelity. 

Find the full show notes for this episode here. 

Like the show? Be sure to give it a 5-star rating and write a great review!

Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

We're tackling a sensitive yet common issue in some marriages: what to do when your spouse’s hygiene (or lack thereof) is causing tension in your relationship. A listener wants to know how to respond without hurting their partner or furthering the disconnect.

Key Takeaways:

• It’s Not Uncommon: Hygiene issues are not as uncommon as one might think. Yet they can be a dealbreaker for many couples when it comes to physical closeness.

• Direct but Kind Communication: Be honest yet gentle. Approach the conversation with love—focus on how hygiene affects the closeness in your marriage rather than making accusations or using harsh language.

• The "We Over Me" Approach: Frame the issue as a shared problem impacting both spouses, not just a complaint from one person.

• Gift What You Want: Subtle actions like buying body wash, cologne, or tissues can serve as positive hints for change.

• Set Clear Boundaries: Define what you need (e.g., brushing teeth before kissing) and stick to those boundaries for your well-being.

Resources:

• Do you have a marriage or relationship question for Dana Che? Submit it at danache.com/contact or DM Dana on Instagram @mrsdanache.

• Check out the "Infidelity Intensive" online course for couples seeking restoration: danache.com/infidelityintensive.

 

Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

As we continue our Healing After Infidelity series, a commonly asked yet sensitive topic is how to re-engage in sex after an affair. If you’ve experienced infidelity in your marriage, you’ve likely wondered this too. 

I'm offering grounded, compassionate wisdom on when and how couples should consider re-engaging sexually after infidelity. With a blend of personal stories, biblical guidance, real-life coaching experiences, and practical steps, this episode aims to support couples in making informed, healthy decisions with restoration at the center.

What You’ll Learn

• Should you have sex after an affair? I address why immediately resuming sexual intimacy may not be healthy or helpful.

• The importance of time and boundaries: Why jumping back into sex too soon can lead to more harm, and why it’s not “sinful” to abstain while healing. 

• Trust, safety & STI checks: The crucial steps every couple should take for health and peace of mind.

• Deconstructing sexual idols: How sex can become an unhealthy replacement for deeper intimacy following infidelity—and why this “idol” must be torn down before true restoration.

• Practical tips for re-engaging: When you’re ready, how to reintroduce sex in a safe, pressure-free way.

• Safety, boundaries, and autonomy: Advice for betrayed spouses if they feel pressured to resume sex, and the importance of reclaiming agency and setting healthy boundaries.

Resources & Next Steps

• FREE Masterclass: Register for “Beyond Betrayal: Three Keys to Healing After Infidelity”—available at danache.com/masterclass

• Upcoming Infidelity Course: Details and registration at danache.com/infidelityintensive

• Show notes & links: Find this episode’s resources at rebuildinguspodcast.com

Subscribe to the podcast wherever you listen or on YouTube, and join the Rebuilding US community for ongoing support and encouragement.

Thank you for listening! If you found this episode helpful, remember to leave a review and share with anyone who might need this support.

 

Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/

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What do you do when your spouse just won't say those three little words, "I love you"? A listener wrote in with this exact issue, sharing how her husband never actually says "I love you," even though it's her love language. She's looking for some advice, and I can actually relate to this. 

It's important for us to hear "I love you," especially as children. I share a bit about my experience vs my hubby, Shaun's experience with these words.  I also give you tips on how to use "I statements" to let your spouse know what you need without making them feel attacked. The key is explaining how you feel and what you need in a way that encourages positivity and open communication.

I also gave some advice to all you parents out there. Even if your kids roll their eyes or just hit you with a "thanks" or a text like, keep telling them you love them! It helps create a sense of belonging that we all need.

If you want to chat more or have questions you want me to tackle in a future episode, DM on Instagram or swing by my website. I’d love to hear from you!

Learn more about my Upcoming Masterclass: Beyond Betrayal

Like the show? Be sure to give it a five-star rating and write a great review!

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The aftermath of infidelity in marriage is painful, to say the least. Chances are you, or someone you know, is dealing with the fallout of an affair. Whether you're the betrayed or the betrayer, or if you're simply offering support to a loved one, this episode aims to provide practical guidance on navigating this tumultuous time.

It’s critical to acknowledge the emotional upheaval that accompanies the revelation of an affair. You're likely to experience a whirlwind of emotions—disappointment, fear, shame, anger, and sorrow, to name a few. Instead of avoiding these feelings, it’s important to validate these feelings. It’s perfectly normal to feel like a stranger to your own emotions. The key is recognizing that your marriage has suffered significant trauma, which requires both patience and understanding. 

In this episode, we discuss the five critical decisions both the betrayed spouse and the unfaithful spouse should avoid making after infidelity comes to light.

 

Resources Mentioned in this Episode: 

Register for my upcoming masterclass: Beyond Betrayal 

Want to go deeper? Learn more about my Infidelity Intensive Course

Ep. 334 - Our Advice to the Unfaithful Spouse - with Shaun Williams 

 

Like this episode? Be sure to give it a five-star rating and write a great review!

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A husband wants help in seeing eye to eye with his wife, more specifically how they can be on the same page during disagreements. This is a common struggle in marriages: finding common ground despite a couple's differences. Understanding the purpose of communication is key here. Listen in as I remind this listener (and you) that it's not about agreeing on everything but about understanding one another's perspectives. I shared practical advice on aligning your values, choosing your battles wisely, and utilizing your different perspectives as strengths.

Highlights from the episode:

• Communication is about understanding, not just agreement.

• Find common values when facing different approaches to problem-solving.

• Use differences to your advantage for a stronger connection.

Resources Mentioned in this Episode:

Ep. 296: Are You a Peacemaker or a "Peacefaker" in Your Relationship?

Join my upcoming free masterclass, "Beyond Betrayal: Three Keys to Healing After Infidelity." 

 

Your questions and insights fuel our conversations—keep them coming! Reach out on Instagram or my website.

And be sure to give this podcast a five-star rating and write a great review!

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When an unfaithful spouse is discovered to have had an affair, there are certain things they need to do to repair the breach if they want to rebuild their marriage. My hubby, Shaun, is back on the podcast and is sharing his insights, as a former unfaithful spouse, and our journey through our season of infidelity. As ones who have walked this path, we want to offer guidance, especially to those who broke their marriage vows, and who might be facing this storm. 

Key Takeaways include what "doing the work" on yourself and your marriage actually looks like, the importance of walking this journey with a skilled professional, taking inventory and accepting responsibility, and more. 

 

Resources Mentioned in this Episode: 

Sign up for my FREE Masterclass: Beyond Betrayal: 3 Keys to Healing After Infidelity 

Learn more about my online course, Infidelity Intensive 

Ep. 326: Why Did This Happen? Healing After Infidelity

 

Like the show? Be sure to give it a five-star rating and write a review!

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