Recess

So many people are stuck in relationships where their partner struggle to emotionally connect, support, and express. Even if partners are not bad people, do not betray us in physical ways, and are generally tangibly supportive, it may be difficult to feel loved and valued if the emotional connection is not present. In episode 31, we look at the subject of emotional maturity as it relations to romantic relationships. We look at both partners perspectives in the hopes that we can learn and move forward towards health, whatever that looks like. 

Gottman Link:

https://www.gottman.com/blog/breaking-pursue-withdraw-pattern-interview-scott-r-woolley-ph-d/

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So many of us expereince a unique sense of discointiut and disruption within ourselves over the course of the pandemic we continue to find ourselves in. During the early shut downs especially, we were taken out of our normal rhythm. If our identity, our sense of worthy and value, was primarily placed on external things and the "doings" of life, we may have found ourselves struggling to know who we were.

On this episode, we discuss why proper prioritization of identity, specifically finding our worthy primarily from the internal identity, can be so helpful as we move towards health and growth!

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If we’re honest, most of our woundings and trauma occurs in the context of relationship. Because of this reality it is important to realize we must be healed via healthy, safe relationships.

Thoughts of “I’m fine by myself” and “I can do this on my own” are often birthed out of fear, pain, and armor. I can certainly empathize with this struggle and can affirm it feels better to be totally out of connection with others than continue in a toxic environment.

Nonetheless, being alone is no long term fix for humans who were meant to be in relationship with other people.

If we were hurt relationally, we must heal relationally.

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Have you ever found yourself disappointed that you weren't 'over' a given situation? Are you tired of feeling down about something in the past? Many of us have been trapped in the thinking that healing and growth is a linear process. In reality, there are so many ups and downs to moving towards health. 

In this weeks' episode of Recess, we continue our series on the reality of healing and discuss 4 ways to look at healing that can help us set good expectations for ourselves as we heal from past wounds. I'm so glad that you're hear! 

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When we chose to move towards healing and health, we inevitably change the relational dynamics around us. Because of this, our loved ones must decide how they want to react. Many of us have seen those we care about chose to remove themselves from us or refuse to change how they treat us. This pain is disorienting. 

On week 1 of "the reality of healing" we discuss 4 ways we can ensure we are continuing to move towards health, even when those we love the most leave us. Welcome to Recess!

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Music: "Meditate" Instrumental by Homage. https://youtu.be/dh_Y7gH8tgY

Mental Health Content can be good and can contribute to rumination if we're constantly consuming for the sake of self-evaluation or self-analysis. Taking a break and ensuring we find rhythms of fun and joy in the hopes of living our life is so key! I encourage everyone in episode 26 of Recess to consider taking breaks from social media mental health!

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Music: "Meditate" Instrumental by Homage. https://youtu.be/dh_Y7gH8tgY

Welcome to the final part of our series on depression. We close with some musings on the intricate balance between suffering and hope. Being able to accept what we cannot control, the difficulties of life, and find hope and belief that better days are possible is the path towards emotional maturity.

Join me for episode 25 as we discuss the balance and how to move towards it.

Research on the benefits of hope:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5120968/

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Music: "Meditate" Instrumental by Homage. https://youtu.be/dh_Y7gH8tgY

Depression is such a difficult experience to navigate. It can become even more difficult if depression manifests as something we are rather than something happening to us.

On episode 24 of Recess, we discuss depression and identity. We look at how we may intertwine the two and how that affects us and keeps us from truly finding growth and healing. I love that you’re joining me!

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Music: "Meditate" Instrumental by Homage. https://youtu.be/dh_Y7gH8tgY

For those of us who have struggles with depression for a number of years, for those who have just begun our journey, using the language of “managing depression” can be helpful in ensuring we accept ourselves exactly where we’re at while we move towards help.

“Elimination” based mental health does nothing to help our spirals and often causes us more shame. On episode 23 we discuss managing depression, how it can be helpful, and ask a few questions to help us navigate!

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Music: "Meditate" Instrumental by Homage. https://youtu.be/dh_Y7gH8tgY

The effectiveness with how we communicate with our friends and loved ones who are struggling with depression often comes down to three key pillars:

Posture

Validation

Presence

If we can move towards healthy expression of cthese things, we can help others know they are seen, understand, and valuable in the midst of their storm. Holding space for depressed folks without having to “fix” them is such a big part of this.

On episode 22 of Recess, we discuss how to communicate with those struggling with depression with these 3 pillars as a guide!

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Music: "Meditate" Instrumental by Homage. https://youtu.be/dh_Y7gH8tgY