Why are you unhappy, even when everything in your life looks “fine” from the outside?

In this episode, happiness expert and bestselling author Gretchen Rubin breaks down the real reasons people feel unhappy, unfulfilled, or stuck, and why traditional advice about happiness often fails. We talk about the hidden causes of unhappiness, the habits that quietly drain joy, and the practical changes that actually lead to lasting happiness.

You’ll learn why happiness is not a personality trait, why chasing happiness can make you feel worse, and how to build a happier life in a realistic, sustainable way, without toxic positivity or pressure to “just be grateful.”

If you’ve ever asked yourself “Why am I unhappy?” or “Why don’t I feel happy even though my life is good?”, this conversation will change how you think about happiness.

In this episode:

• Why people feel unhappy even when life is going well

• Common happiness myths that make people feel worse

• The habits that quietly reduce happiness

• How to increase happiness in everyday life

• Practical advice from Gretchen Rubin’s research

About Gretchen Rubin:

Gretchen Rubin is a bestselling author, Founder of The Happiness Project, and one of today’s leading experts on happiness, habits, and human nature. Her books include The Happiness Project, Better Than Before, The Four Tendencies and Outer Order, Inner Calm and more.

Gretchen’s links:

Happier with Gretchen Rubin Podcast

Website

Newsletter

Quizzes

(00:01:02) Welcome Gretchen Rubin to the podcast.

(00:05:00) Gretchen’s beginnings and journey from law student to happiness expert.

(00:09:27) What IS happiness anyways? Can we define it?

(00:14:50) Can you control our own happiness? What if bad stuff happens?

(00:19:40) Gretchen bestsellers: “Better Than Before” and “The Four Tendencies” 

(00:27:10) Why you shouldn’t fight your fundamental natural tendency.

(00:36:27) Why we need to know ourselves for better communication and how not to judge others but see them.

(00:42:25) Change is hard. And what to do when lonely.

(00:51:38) Is being unhappy a default human setting?

(00:59:39) Do we need hobbies to be happy?

(01:08:06) Where to find and hear more from Gretchen Rubin.

Want to leave the TTSL Podcast a voicemail? We love your questions and adore hearing from you. https://www.speakpipe.com/TheThickThighsSaveLivesPodcast

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