Schools of Excellence: The No. 1 ECE & Private School Leadership Podcast

A few weeks ago, I sat down with Jessica Hampton and Katie Dank on Child Care Confidential, and about ten minutes in, Jessica said, "You just described my life." That's usually how these conversations go.

We talked about what's in This Can't Be Normal, and specifically about why a bigger team can still leave a leader feeling completely alone. We got into the difference between systems, standards, and rhythms, why "getting buy-in" is often a leader avoiding a hard conversation instead of building real alignment, and why waking up at 2 am with your brain looping isn't a personality flaw. It's a drift, and it's a signal worth listening to.

If you've ever felt like the only one actually working while everyone else gets to play pretend until things get hard, this conversation is for you.

• Why "protecting your energy" is the wrong goal, and what to do instead
• The real difference between systems, standards, and rhythms, and why only rhythms create safety
• What "performing confusion" looks like when a director avoids holding a standard
• Why proximity isn't accountability, and how leaders end up being the business instead of building one
• Why resistance to a new standard is often a sign the standard is a good one
• The three-part definition of a rhythm: pre-decided, mood-proof, and identity-giving

Resources Mentioned:

• Download Chapter One of This Can’t Be Normal: https://thiscantbenormal.com/chapter-one
• Grab a copy of This Can’t Be Normal: https://thiscantbenormal.com/

Connect With Us:

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/
• Join us on Substack: https://chaniewilschanski.substack.com/

Earlier in the week, we talked about micromanaging, the first thing that shows up in what I call the delegation dip. Today we're moving into the second thing: neglect.

Neglect doesn't look like yelling or control. It looks like handing someone the reins and walking away, especially when they seem competent enough that you assume they don't need guidance. I want to share a story that plays out in schools constantly, where a leader hires someone highly capable, assumes competence means they don't need training, and unintentionally leaves them to fend for themselves.

We'll talk about what neglect actually looks like day to day, why it's just as damaging as micromanaging even though it feels like the opposite, and how to give your team the guidance they need without hovering over them.

- Why hiring someone capable can accidentally lead to less training, not more

- The difference between coaching a beginner and coaching someone already skilled

- Why teachers and directors need different mindsets

- How unclear direction leads people to fill gaps with self-doubt

- Practical ways to guide your team without micromanaging or disappearing

Tune in for part two of this series, and get ready to look at delegation a little differently.

Resources Mentioned:

• Free Delegation Workshop: https://schoolsofexcellence.com/delegation

Connect With Us:

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/
• Join us on Substack: https://chaniewilschanski.substack.com/

You've probably been told you can't delegate because you're a control freak or a perfectionist. This episode kicks off a new series called the Delegation Dip, and Chanie makes the case that sometimes holding onto a task is wisdom, not fear.

- Why delegating a task and delegating an outcome goal are different skills

- The difference between a taskmaster and a profit warrior on your team

- What the delegation dip is and why efficiency drops after you hand something off

- The real, fear based root of micromanagement

- Three signs you're micromanaging, and what to do instead

Tune in for part one of this series, and get ready to rethink what delegation actually requires.

Resources Mentioned:

• Free Delegation Workshop: https://schoolsofexcellence.com/delegation

Connect With Us:

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/
• Join us on Substack: https://chaniewilschanski.substack.com/

Ever given a teacher feedback and watched her shut down right in front of you? This week, Chanie breaks down the real difference between feedback and feed forward, and why one keeps your team stuck while the other actually helps them grow.

- Why feedback can trigger fight, flight, or freeze in your team

- A real coaching story about a curriculum specialist who was hypercritical with one age group

- The exact questions that help a teacher see her own blind spots

- How often you should be running formal check-ins with your staff

- Who you should actually be asking for feedback, and who you shouldn't

Tune in for a practical shift you can use in your very next coaching conversation.

Resources Mentioned:

• This Can't Be Normal by Chanie Wilschanski: https://thiscantbenormal.com
• Access Chapter One of This Can’t Be Normal for Free: https://thiscantbenormal.com/chapter-one

Connect With Us:

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/
• Join us on Substack: https://chaniewilschanski.substack.com/

Why do your school's systems keep breaking, even after you've built the SOPs and invested in outside help? Chanie explains the real pattern behind it, and it isn't a discipline problem.

In this episode:

- Why even a $2.1 million consulting investment couldn't fix one leader's system

- The real reason caretakers break their own rules under pressure

- The four-part framework every system needs to actually hold: standard, ownership, rhythm, response

- How to start noticing the invisible ways you rescue your team from consequences

Tune in for why the fix isn't another template.

Resources Mentioned:

• This Can't Be Normal by Chanie Wilschanski: https://thiscantbenormal.com
• Access Chapter One of This Can’t Be Normal for Free: https://thiscantbenormal.com/chapter-one

Connect With Us:

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/
• Join us on Substack: https://chaniewilschanski.substack.com/

Two of the trickiest drama symptoms to spot -- and the eight traits of leadership that replace them.

In this episode, Chanie finishes the drama symptoms series with a look at manipulation and inconsistent actions and behaviors. Key topics include:

• The cost framework for deciding when it is time to let a toxic employee go
• Why grief is a natural and valid part of removing drama from your culture
• How inconsistency creates hypervigilance on your team
• The difference between inconsistency and intentional discernment
• The 8 characteristics of a drama-free leader -- and how to apply them when hiring and coaching

If you have been holding onto someone you know you should let go, or leading a team that cannot predict what is coming next, this episode is your next step.

Resources Mentioned:

• This Can't Be Normal by Chanie Wilschanski: https://thiscantbenormal.com
• Access Chapter One of This Can’t Be Normal for Free: https://thiscantbenormal.com/chapter-one

Connect With Us:

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/
• Join us on Substack: https://chaniewilschanski.substack.com/

Sharon Jayakumar owns a Reggio-inspired school of nearly 200 children in Philadelphia and a few years ago, she almost walked away from all of it. Not because her school was failing. Because growing without infrastructure was taking everything she had.

In this episode, Sharon and Chanie talk about what changed when she stopped going it alone. Key topics include:

• Building infrastructure that holds as your school grows
• What standards actually are -- and how to return to them after drift
• How one month of one-on-ones eliminated call-outs at her school
• Why buy-in comes after deployment, not before
• What it looks like to hire from a place of partnership instead of rescue

If you have been asking whether your school can ever really run without you, this one is for you.

Resources Mentioned:

• This Can't Be Normal by Chanie Wilschanski: https://thiscantbenormal.com
• Access Chapter One of This Can’t Be Normal for Free: https://thiscantbenormal.com/chapter-one

Connect With Us:

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/
• Join us on Substack: https://chaniewilschanski.substack.com/

Is drama quietly draining your school culture? In Part 2 of the Decoding Your Culture series, Chanie breaks down three signs that drama has taken root in your center, using real stories from real school leaders.

In this episode:

• What drama actually looks like in a childcare center (it's rarely the big blowups)
• Why criticizing and complaining spreads from one person to an entire team
• How one director transformed her culture by addressing gossip in her own life first
• What victim mentality looks like in leadership and how to shift it
• Why you cannot separate who you are at home from who you are at work

Tune in for the stories and insight that will help you see your culture more clearly.

Resources Mentioned:

• This Can't Be Normal by Chanie Wilschanski: https://thiscantbenormal.com
• Access Chapter One of This Can’t Be Normal for Free: https://thiscantbenormal.com/chapter-one

Connect With Us:

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/

You hired a team so you wouldn't have to carry it all — so why does it feel like you're carrying more than ever?

In this episode, Chanie Wilschanski breaks down the ownership gap that keeps school leaders stuck and alone, no matter how big their team gets. You'll learn:

• Why delegation and ownership produce completely different outcomes
• The four-part infrastructure — Standard, Ownership, Rhythm, Response — that creates real shared leadership
• Why there will always be a reason the standard doesn't get met, and how to build systems that hold anyway
• How protecting your team from hard work is actually working against both of you

If you're ready to stop being the emergency plan for your own school, this episode is where to start.

• Download Chapter One of This Can't Be Normal for free: https://thiscantbenormal.com/chapter-one
• This Can't Be Normal: What to Do When Success Starts to Feel Like Survival by Chanie Wilschanski — https://thiscantbenormal.com

Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/

Your school has a culture right now. The question is whether you actually know what it's saying.

In Part 1 of the Culture Decoder series, Chanie Wilschanski breaks down what company culture actually is, what it isn't, and how to start reading the emotional data already showing up in your building. You'll learn:

- Why perks and team events are not culture (and what actually is)

- How to identify your school's core cultural tension

- Why negative emotions are your most valuable data

- The first step of the Culture Decoder framework

- Why building stronger culture starts with observing yourself, not your team

• Download Chapter One of This Can't Be Normal for free: https://thiscantbenormal.com/chapter-one
• This Can't Be Normal: What to Do When Success Starts to Feel Like Survival by Chanie Wilschanski — https://thiscantbenormal.com

• Let's Chat on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chaniewilschanski/