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On today’s show, I discuss what happens when the body starts reaching for connection before the mind feels ready. After loss or betrayal, the drive for closeness doesn’t disappear, it just gets confused. I talk about why attachment and grief are inseparable, how avoidant and anxious patterns develop as survival strategies, and why betrayal grief feels so different from death loss. This episode breaks down what’s really happening inside the nervous system when you crave touch, reassurance, or familiarity after pain, and how to slow that reflex down without shutting it off. Connection before safety isn’t failure, it’s a reflex that helped you survive. The work is learning to listen to it without letting it lead.
Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind
Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at [email protected]
Find me on Substack - Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack
If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at https://enhanced-mind.com/
I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!
#BDSM #Psychology #Grief #Attachment
By The Kink Perspective5
2323 ratings
On today’s show, I discuss what happens when the body starts reaching for connection before the mind feels ready. After loss or betrayal, the drive for closeness doesn’t disappear, it just gets confused. I talk about why attachment and grief are inseparable, how avoidant and anxious patterns develop as survival strategies, and why betrayal grief feels so different from death loss. This episode breaks down what’s really happening inside the nervous system when you crave touch, reassurance, or familiarity after pain, and how to slow that reflex down without shutting it off. Connection before safety isn’t failure, it’s a reflex that helped you survive. The work is learning to listen to it without letting it lead.
Continue the discussion on Fetlife: @Enhanced-Mind
Don't forget to hit the follow button and rate my show 5 stars so others may find it. What to be on the show or have an idea for an upcoming episode? Email me at [email protected]
Find me on Substack - Enhanced-Mind's Substack | Chris C. | Substack
If you are looking for a therapist that is knowledgeable about the lifestyle, or just a therapist in general, please feel free to reach out through my website at https://enhanced-mind.com/
I have a book out, Tangled Desires: Exploring the Intersection of BDSM and Psychology. Can find it where you purchase most of your ebooks. Print version out now!
#BDSM #Psychology #Grief #Attachment

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