This is a tender episode that Lauren and I made in response to an anonymous question we received the week prior. This brave person reached out to us asking for advice about their decision to have first intercourse within their current relationship. The original anonymous question is read aloud for the audience, but the additional context provided by our brave friend is kept out of the episode.

We first build a container that we feel lays the foundation of the following conversation: our backgrounds, our perspectives, and our shortcomings– i.e. we haven’t met this person, and only know a few details of the situation. From there, Lauren and I give our own stories relating to first intercourse and we try to give our friend tools they can use to analyze their own situation from a sex-positive, consent based perspective. We also follow the situation through – if this disagreement about intercourse ended in a breakup; what would that look like? We discuss what our friend can do to support themselves in a way that honors the bravery of their decision to stand on their values, yet also acknowledges the pain of a breakup. 

Episode 10 is heartfelt, tender, and real. Thank you for trusting us with your question, friend. You are so worthy, so loved, so kind.

Click here for our sexual values worksheet. Use code: PODCAST10 to download for free until 12/20.

To submit your own anonymous question: click here or email [email protected]

Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own!  Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. 

Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator. Holland has a BS in Public Health.

Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠ (for femme-presenting people only at this time)

We kick things off with a pact—a pact to change the narrative. Lauren and I recognize that in relationships, it's all too easy to focus on the negatives. So, we're committing to sharing the positives about our partners, shifting the conversation to celebrate the good stuff.

Lauren and I talk about relationship stereotypes, and different ways we’ve seen them play out in real life. We also dive into the complexities of aligning your longings with potential partners. For more on this, watch Episode 3: Communication in Early Partnership

Friendzoning and friends with benefits? We've been there! Lauren and I share our personal experiences and insights. Lauren delves into the importance of setting boundaries in friends with benefits relationships to ensure that both parties are respected.

Lauren discusses relationships of financial convenience and how her first marriage largely fell into that category. And I share my own personal anecdote, highlighting how relationships of convenience can deviate from traditional gender dynamics.

Sex Ed For You is not your average podcast. Lauren and I bring research to the table, infusing it with real-life experiences and laughs. We're here to empower and educate, all while keeping it fun and relatable. Get ready for an upbeat, honest, and informative conversation that'll leave you with a fresh perspective on relationships and a smile on your face. Trust me, you don't want to miss this one!

Love, Holland <3

Sex Ed For You Merch

Download: Journal Prompts to Reconnect with Your Sensuality

Order by Sunday, Dec 10 to get your merch by Christmas (US ONLY)!

Resources:

Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today!!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own!  Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you.  Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator.

Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠ (for femme-presenting people only at this time)

This episode is about all the aspects of holidays– the heartwarming, the challenging, and the transformative. I open up about a pivotal moment in my life; my first panic attack that happened during a tense family gathering. It was a moment that changed my perspective on mental health and family dynamics forever. Sharing this vulnerable experience reminds us that it's okay not to be okay, especially during the holidays.

Lauren's story about her recent beach vacation and using play to renegotiate trauma is simply inspiring. Her journey teaches us that healing can come in unexpected ways and empowers us to explore our own paths towards healing and resilience.

We take a thought-provoking turn in the conversation when Lauren asks: Can you change someone's mind? We dive into the complexities of opinions, family dynamics, and the challenges of shifting perspectives, especially during holiday gatherings.

Navigating through family interactions during the holidays can sometimes be tricky. Lauren and I share practical advice on how to respond to inappropriate questions or comments from family members while maintaining personal boundaries and respect. 

And when it comes to kids' safety during the holidays, it's paramount. We discuss valuable tips on ensuring a safe environment and fostering open communication channels. Empowering kids to trust their intuition around extended family members becomes a crucial aspect of holiday safety.

Resources:

Other Links:

Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own!  Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. 

Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator.
Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠ (for femme-presenting people only at this time)

In this episode, Lauren and Holland delve into the biopsychosocial approach that defines our work. Our conversation centers on the often-overlooked nuances of addressing issues like vaginismus, dyspareunia, and various vulva-related concerns. We explore the unfortunate tendency to label these conditions without engaging in meaningful discussions with patients, highlighting the need for a more holistic understanding.

The episode delves into empowering practices that individuals can adopt at home to holistically confront these challenges, emphasizing the importance of cultivating a positive relationship with one's own vulva. Lauren and Holland discuss the pervasive shame associated with vulvas, shedding light on society's limited exposure to unaltered representations of their beauty. We underscore the pivotal role this plays in reshaping the narrative surrounding women's bodies, promoting a perspective that recognizes them as resilient, stunning, and deserving of adoration.

Adding a unique dimension to the conversation, Holland shares her insights on distinguishing between phallic and non-phallic love scenes, offering a thought-provoking exploration of intimacy. Holland also opens up about her personal experience with dyspareunia, bravely unraveling the myth of the "tight p*ssy" and how it perpetuated her struggle for years. This candid discussion challenges preconceptions and contributes to a broader conversation about dismantling harmful stereotypes, fostering empathy, and embracing the diverse beauty inherent in every individual's experience.

Resources:

Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own!  Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. 

Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator.
Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠ (for femme-presenting people only at this time)

Join us as we candidly discuss the different phases of the menstrual cycle, shedding light on the often misunderstood aspects and sharing practical advice on how to embrace each stage with grace and self-care. Holland opens up about her own poignant and unforgettable experience—an intensely painful cycle from the month she moved to Virginia. Her story underscores the challenges many individuals face during their menstrual cycles, emphasizing the importance of compassion and self-care.

Throughout the episode, we emphasize the significance of shifting your perspective on the menstrual cycle. We encourage listeners to embrace the fluidity and dynamism of their cycles, urging them to let go of preconceived notions and instead approach their periods with an open mind. We believe that understanding the cycle's shifts and nuances can empower individuals to navigate their lives more harmoniously.

Resources:

Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today! www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own!  Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. 

Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator.

Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠ https://sexedforyou.com/hemlock 

Welcome to SEX ED FOR YOU with Lauren & Holland: Where Research Meets Reality! In episode 5, Lauren & Holland quickly discuss what it looks like to do power differently and allow the mess of humanity. In a world where everyone is on social media and our lives are so public, we encourage ourselves and others to remain authentic. This leads us to talk about the importance of establishing sexual values and what we think is influencing Holland’s generation (Zillenials) and those younger than she. 

The anatomy and physiology of vulvas is an important topic we feel isn’t often discussed, so we talk about what arousal looks like, why penetrative intercourse can be painful, and our own experiences with pelvic floor issues. Lauren offers positions to try that can help reduce and avoid pain. 

Finally, Lauren regales us with her story of the missing OhNut, which will leave you in tears of laughter.

Resources:

Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own!  Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. 

Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator.

Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠ https://sexedforyou.com/hemlock

Welcome to SEX ED FOR YOU with Lauren & Holland: Where Research Meets Reality! On our fourth episode, Lauren and I lean heavily into the reality aspect of this podcast. The day we recorded this episode was the day we launched this podcast, and boy were we exhausted! 

Not only were we overwhelmed with the details of launching, but we both were facing hardships in our personal lives as well. We discuss the aftermath of a triggering event, the therapeutic effect, and being torn between emotions and logic. 

Like Lauren’s shirt? Us too. Buy it here on our website!

Here are the authors + books we mentioned throughout the episode: adrienne marie brown, Cassandra Speaks by Elizabeth Lesser and Codependent No More by Melody Beattie

Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today! www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own!  Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. 

Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator.

Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠

Welcome to Sex Ed For You: Where Research Meets Reality. The theme of episode 3 is communication; the main idea-- who are you, what do you want, where have you been, and where do you want to go?

CONTENT WARNING: This is a tender episode that discusses sexual trauma and the steps we are taking to heal ourselves. Please skip this episode if it does not serve your body.

Welcome to SEX ED FOR YOU with Lauren & Holland: Where research meets reality! On our second episode we dive right into a discussion about our recent Hemlock Book Club where we discussed Elizabeth Lesser’s book, Cassandra Speaks: When Women Are the Storytellers, the Human Story Changes!

Holland and I ask questions about blame, power, and what would happen if women told the stories! If you would like to know more about our HEMLOCK MONTHLY MEMBERSHIP PROGRAM, click here: https://sexedforyou.com/hemlock

Holland defines blame as disgust in her body. Which leaves us wondering how YOU would define blame? At minute 7:25, Lauren asks about the fears we encounter as we step into our power. Does the fear of being liked keep you from stepping into your power?

At minute 10:45 we are privileged enough to hear Holland tell a delicate piece of her story. TW: SA

At minute 11:50 Holland shares a recent term she learned: DROP. Commonly used in BDSM and Kink communities, it refers to the time AFTER a scene or experience when the body’s system stops producing morphine-like drugs, and as the parasympathetic nervous system kicks in again. One may feel a deep exhaustion, a sharp drop in temperature, as well as incoherence and un-coordination. The symptoms of drop will generally set in within 24-72 hours after an intense experience in which endorphins and adrenaline received a spike and thus will result in a crash with symptoms reminiscent of depression. For more information please follow: https://www.instagram.com/mx.sizzle_/

Holland shares the symbolism behind her tattoo, (check out the photo at minute 19:50!!) and the why behind her healing rituals. We discuss the power of differentiation and how so many things can be medicine or poison! The act of creating can redeem.

Holland expounds on how writing poetry has been a healing modality in this season of healing and Lauren remembers how she learned to write haiku poetry in her Healing Rituals class in school!

Lauren recently completed a healing ritual to release herself from specific misogynistic wounds. She shares what she wore, what she wrote, the responsibility it forced her to take for her own narrative.

Holland shares a little about Stockholm syndrome and how she identifies with some of the symptoms she identifies with.

Moving from survivor to thriver can be such a powerful choice for anyone who has been harmed - but it can ONLY be done when we are ready.

Make sure to listen at minute 42:20 for the most BEAUTIFUL line from Holland’s poem!

Pain can be pleasurable and Holland is looking forward to it! This tattoo is bringing Holland from Powerless to POWERFUL.

Interested in learning more about healing rituals? Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today! www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you.

Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator.

Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠ https://sexedforyou.com/hemlock

Welcome to SEX ED FOR YOU with Lauren & Holland: Where research meets reality! The podcast for people who want to date and have great sex that is safe, fun, and enjoyable. Empowering our listeners to make informed decisions that lead to values-based living. 

On this debut episode we discuss the “why” behind this podcast from our various points of view and how we imagine the research will meet reality!

We firmly believe that research only tells one part of the story. We all deserve to make informed decisions of our very own and discover the results of our choices. Sometimes they align with the research - sometimes they do not!  We truly hope this podcast allows you to learn and laugh!

Holland really wanted this episode to be more than an introduction! So, you are welcome in advance for the hilarious stories of dates and sexual encounters that were less than great!!!

Lauren tells her “pick a color” story that will leave you in stitches, followed by Holland’s “chainsaw man” catfish disaster! Then Lauren closes us out with her “menstrual disk gone” wrong in Manhattan moment!

We hope you enjoy this first episode and our hilarious and cringey stories that include quotes like “it was as if the clitoris does not exist.” 

Interested in learning more about the type of education Sex Ed for You offers? Click here to request a FREE 15-Minute Consult today! www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult!

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how we" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own!  Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. 

Please note: Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator.

Looking to expand your own sexuality education? Check out our monthly membership program, HEMLOCK. At only $10 a month you'll have access to the tools you need to begin to reclaim your sexuality for yourself!⁠ https://sexedforyou.com/hemlock