Dr Karen Gurney AKA The Sex Doctor is on a mission to help us understand how desire works, particularly in women, because it is NOT the spontaneous desire that we see in the movies. In fact, she says ‘It is normal to never feel like sex, out of the blue, ever, in a long term relationship’.

As well as female desire, Steph and Karen discuss how sex changes from those exciting early flushes at the start of a relationship, the impact of having children and the mental load, talking to kids about sex, and how we can future-proof our sex life, including through increasing ‘Sexual Currency’.

Dr Karen also answers listener questions, about sex after having a baby, infidelity, not feeling attracted to your partner and never feeling like sex, even though it’s always good ‘once we’re doing it’.

• Karen’s book Mind the Gap and Online Courses 

• Karen’s TedX Talk ‘The Surprising Truth About Desire’ 

• Karen’s TedX Talk ‘The Power of Orgasms to Address Gender Equality’ 

• Karen’s Instagram

• Steph’s Instagram 

• Sex is a Funny Word by Cory Silverberg and Fiona Smyth – book for kids 

• State of Affairs by Esther Perel 

• Thoughtful gifts at Don’t Buy Her Flowers 

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