Shutdown Fullcast

Long ago, Colorado decided it was going to turn Nebraska into a rival. It took a while to work, but the Buffs pulled it off, so we're following their example and creating new potential rivalries of our own with your help. (Oh, we also wrote some of them down.) This episode is also about Spencer being a coastal elite with a sincere love for Italian sparkling wine, if any of that appeals to you.

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Look, there's a significant amount of football discussion on this episode, seeing how Tennessee lost at home to Georgia State and (other football games that are not nearly as funny as that). I'm sure we said funny or insightful or stupid things about those games, but let's be honest about why we're all here: to talk about Hugh Freeze coaching a football game from a hospital bed they put in the press box.

Because Hugh Freeze coached a football game from a hospital bed they put in the press box.

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ATTENTION LAWYERS: THIS IS NOT THE HEISMAN TROPHY WE"RE TALKING ABOUT. PLEASE DO NOT SUE US, AS WE DON'T HAVE MUCH MONEY ANYWAYS. This episode is about the People's Heisman, an entirely different award in that it doesn't currently exist in trophy form and has never formally been awarded to anyone, and a very similar award in that we only sort of kind of decided who qualifies for it. Simply put, the People's Heisman is for the players we remember fondly not necessarily because they were the best or most accomplished but because they were just so very memorable. It's for a Quinton Flowers, or a Joel Lanning, or a Scooby Wright, or a Jared Lorezen (RIP). 

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Between Florida and Miami trying to melt down in any possible direction and Hawaii-Arizona doing the same but with way more scoring and quarterbacks who look like they wanna fight Johnny Utah, Week 0 was...a colossal success! We talk about that and a few storylines we'll be throwing our stupid little hearts into this year. 

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Congratulations! You have decided to start listening to the Shutdown Fullcast, the world's only college football podcast. This episode is designed to help you understand the accumulated lore, riffs, and nonsense that make up the fabric of this show, but because it was designed by the hosts, it may not prove to be very helpful. If you are here because of a friend who recommended the show, please tell them thanks from us. If you are here because of a friend who has pranked you, please tell them thanks from us anyways.

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Nobody had ever thought to have people send in questions that podcast hosts could answer on a recorded episode. But then we went and did it, because we're podcast innovators. Please send us thousands of dollars so we can consult for your business or whatever. 

The questions on this episode include, but are not limited to:

- Who takes over at Bama after Nick Saban?

- What team is most ready to explode into a dumpster fire? 

- What would you choose as the mascot if you were the AD of a new program?

- How are our skin care routines looking? 

- Which children's entertainment is the worst? 

- What is a blender's highest use? 

- Did people think Garth Brooks was sexy in the mid 90s?

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Vacations are like any other carefully planned human endeavor: they are subject to complete and total collapse, from predictable factors and from shit you never saw coming. You, the listeners, have pooped yourselves, seriously injured yourselves, left each other in jail on false charges, been conquered by Disney, and caused permanent damage to your relationships. Fortunately, we have done these things, too. The Shutdown Fullcast: We All Sink Down Here!

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Our listeners share their tips and tricks for a more pleasant Saturday viewing experience, we discuss the college football destinations we have yet to enjoy but want to visit, and somehow we talk about clothes Ryan bought in middle school. 

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As we approach a new season of college football, we, as esteemed members of the national media, have an important job before us: to embrace bold, possibly stupid, predictions about what is yet to come and spread them into the world. But we want to break down the distinction between "host" and "listener," which is why we have turned this honored task into a game that you can play as well! Go to https://forms.gle/gJH1TH9HhkkyUyQY6 to enter, and throughout the season we'll tell you exactly how much better you are than Ryan at this.

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This is the episode where we try to convince you we are reasonably well-rounded people who travel and read for pleasure and watch television that isn't just whatever weird Minnesota replay the Big Ten Network has picked out for a summer Tuesday afternoon. Maybe you'll get some ideas for new things you can enjoy in the remaining days before football season starts. Maybe you'll think our taste sucks and tweet us better things we should have consumed. Either one is fine, just remember: send those tweets to @38Godfrey.

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