Shutdown Fullcast

Welcome to the flaming inferno that separates Teams That Are Pretty Good from Teams That Nope No They Are Not. Which side will you fall on, Texas Tech and TCU? Do you dare test the power of the fire, Texas A&M and South Carolina? UCLA! Cal! You must also be tested, even if yes UCLA is kind of already burned completely at this point!

Oh, also Barry Alvarez is building a clone in full view of the world.

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We discuss:

- Why Mike Stoops Was Barely Making It On 950K a Year

- Why Spencer should shut the hell up about being happy because he doesn't know the meaning of pain

- The joy of watching Paul Johnson sit on a grudge for 12 damn years

- Mizzou/South Carolina was the most important game of the week because dear god, did you see half the bullshit that happened in that game

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That's right, the Red River Ramblin' Rigatoni Ruckus is back, with both teams ranked and looking to grab control of the Big 12. So we talked about weird food and miniature cattle and big ole rabbits. It's also the anniversary of Auburn 3-Mississippi State 2, either Rutgers or Illinois is gonna get a Big 10 win, and Miami will probably unveil some way too sexual prop just to prove they're the manliest man in mandom. Granted, we didn't talk about any of that for the first 15 minutes or so, the designated non-football portion of this podcast. This show will never get any better, no matter how much you or I would like it to. That's fun. This is all fun.

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Sure, James Franklin maybe could have called a better play at the end of the Ohio State game. And sure, maybe Bobby Petrino blew a chance to beat Florida State for almost no reason. But Jason almost ladder match'd innocent bystanders in a Publix. Further points of discussion:Kentucky is good!Notre Dame is also good and that's confusing!Nebraska is not good!Washington State may or may not be good but they have achieved PEAK AIR RAID form!Talented Mr. Ripley-ing strategies!Stop being a grumpus about fans rushing the field!

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TOPICS DISCUSSED ON THIS IMPORTANT EPISODE!

All millennials are actually a thousand years old, Chip Kelly is now the highest paid public park boot camp instructor in the world, Bill Snyder literally declares "You shall not pass" and reminds everyone that he is Windbreaker Gandalf, Holly plays video games during the podcast, a short discussion of charming felonious quarterbacks, Cal is the Kentucky of the Pac-12, and do not watch whatever USC/Arizona is going to be, just don't.

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Ryan didn't watch very much football this weekend, so his helpful and not at all hostile friends Holly, Spencer, and Jason stepped up to give him an understanding of how yes, that was how many points Mississippi State scored and no, the Stanford and Washington wins were not in any way similar and yes, TCU and Oklahoma State both lost and no, there is no good explanation for what happened in the Old Dominion-Virginia Tech game.

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The world's most prophetic podcast continues to speak abominations into existence, most notably that news about erotic Super Mario associates. What Week 4 horrors can we create? Everyone is recording in the same chronology for once! HOW BAD is USC's offense? HOW BAD is Bobby Petrino's offense? Michigan Debate Team disavows this loss to Nebraska! Jeremy Pruitt's food groups! Which truck is your school? Lifehack: lose to Kentucky! AL.com reporter Tow Mater! Bet actual money on Buffalo-Rutgers! Honestly it's mostly more Lewd Nintendo Content.

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Ed Orgeron did a cuss, but BYU won in Madison despite specifically not doing cusses, so it remains to be seen whether or not cusses are the way to win football games. Arkansas and Northwestern and USC all probably did some cusses, though you can't really blame them for that. Also there's way too much sexual discussion in this episode related to the Mario universe. Sorry.

P.S. Kansas scored 55 points in a football game in 2018 and Rutgers is now a cuss.

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Why aren't vans cool anymore? Is Steve Addazio actually Poseidon's personal trainer? What happens if Bama has to score 60 points to beat Ole Miss? Why did Jason bet real American money on UMass? What is up with Miami's road schedule? Who's gonna get a big ole dose of self-confidence this weekend by beating up a bad team? Where does Spencer think Woody Hayes's severed leg would have ended up? Why do we rely on this question structure as if it will be the thing to convince you to listen to the episode?

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USC, come here and have some tea. Texas, we brought you epsom salts. Florida, you look like - oh, you're dead? Apparently you're dead. That's fun. Week 2 had plenty of pain and suffering for the shuffling crusty former titans of college football, as well as fun performances from Clemson-Texas A&M, USF-Georgia Tech, and Michigan State-Arizona State. Also, Jason was the only non Iowa or Iowa State fan who watched all of El Assico and in doing so he discovered a MASSIVE ESPN MEDIA LIESPIRACY.

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