Parenting the neurotypical teenager is not a job for the faint at heart, but when your teen has an ADHD diagnosis, it can feel downright daunting. In this week’s episode, although my guest, Dr. Mark Bertin, (a board certified developmental behavioral pediatrician, on the board of directors for the American Professional Society of ADHD and Related Disorders) specifically addresses parents of teens with ADHD, much of his wisdom applies to most parents of teens and tweens.  

As the parent of an adolescent, it can be so frustrating to deal with the daily homework battles, checking behind them, constantly reminding, not to mention the emotionality and the behavior issues that often intensify beginning in middle school. 

But for parents of a teen with ADHD, these issues are 10-fold because of the additional delay your kid has is self-management skills. Add in IEPs or 504s, evaluations, doctor visits, medication issues, communications with the school…and you have a recipe for major stress, overwhelm and exhaustion.

Learning to manage your reactivity to your teen’s behavior is crucial for their wellbeing and yours. This is true not only for parents of a teen with ADHD, but for parents of any teen. And so much of our behavior as parents, depends on our own thoughts and emotions – expectations for ourselves, judgment from others, questions about our teen’s behavior, etc. 

Dr. Bertin gives us guidance for reframing the way we think about these issues, discusses mindfulness and its impact on our reactivity, and addresses specific ADHD-related concerns as well.

Download my Free guide, "The Giant Book of Parenting ADHD Teens"

 Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

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This episode is marked explicit because of language contained in soundbites and quotes from Andrew Tate. I believe it’s absolutely necessary to hear the exact language to understand the totality of his dangerous message.  

Andrew Tate - or “Top-G” as his legions of fans call him - has also been called the "King of Toxic Masculinity” by those who are not as easily duped. Teachers know about him and his message because they deal with it daily from “radicalized” middle and high school boys. And many teen girls and grown women know him as the guy who tells their boyfriend, classmate or co-worker that it's okay to treat women as property, to slap them around or otherwise put them in their place.

You need to understand who he is, the message he’s spreading, and the vile and despicable things he’s been accused of doing so you can discuss it intelligently with your teens and tweens.

Get ready to be shocked and baffled by his meteoric rise to one of “the most Googled men on the planet” and the #1 influencer of teens in 2022, someone who’s managed to amass a fortune on the backs of trafficked women and adolescent males who willingly spread his message and increase his influence for money.

 Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you love about the show. 

If you’re listening in Spotify, you can also rate the show by going to the main episode page and tap the 3 dots to the right of the follow button, tap rate show and tap the 5th star!

Thank you in advance for helping me help more parents!

I drop new episodes every Tuesday and Friday so please tap Follow on the main episode page, so they’ll be ready for you in your app. 

You can reach out to me with ideas for the show or guest suggestions

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

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Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen

Lying. It’s always up there with “Cheating and Stealing”. And none of it sounds too good when we’re talking about our own teenager. 

No one wants to believe their kid could lie to them. And once it happens, it’s terribly hard to for us to trust them again. They may directly lie to us, conveniently leave out specific information, or even avoid our questions entirely by steering the conversation.

Why is it that teenagers seem to lie so frequently and about so many different things? Is it rebellion? Is it a character flaw? And can the way we parent impact their need to lie to us? The answer is yes, it can.

Join me this week as we examine why teens lie, what we can do to help prevent it and how to talk to them when we’ve caught them in a lie.

 Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you love about the show. 

If you’re listening in Spotify, you can also rate the show by going to the main episode page and tap the 3 dots to the right of the follow button, tap rate show and tap the 5th star!

Thank you in advance for helping me help more parents!

I drop new episodes every Tuesday and Friday so please tap Follow on the main episode page, so they’ll be ready for you in your app. 

You can reach out to me with ideas for the show or guest suggestions here. Thanks so much for listening!

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

Connect with us on Facebook or Instagram  

Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen

There’s never a shortage of news stories about someone in a position of power or authority who has physically, emotionally, or sexually abused a child or an adolescent in their care. We’ve seen it in schools, churches, sports organizations - anywhere adults are in charge of young people. 

And for all the high-profile cases, there are thousands more that perhaps involve fewer kids or a not-so-famous organization and still more than go unreported. 

When one of these stories come to light, our questions are always the same. How did this happen? Why did these kids not say something? Why didn’t they tell someone? Why didn’t they ask their parents for help? 

I believe the answer’s pretty simple: it’s because we’ve taught our kids to keep their mouths shut. We’ve taught them to “respect authority”, to “obey their elders”, to “not talk back”, to “do what they’re told”...and by doing so, we’ve put them at great risk for harm. 

Join me this week as I examine how we can change the narrative with our kids about “respecting authority” to do a better job of keeping them safe from predatory and abusive adults in positions of power or trust.
 
 Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you love about the show. 

If you’re listening in Spotify, you can also rate the show by going to the main episode page and tap the 3 dots to the right of the follow button, tap rate show and tap the 5th star!

Thank you in advance for helping me help more parents!

I drop new episodes every Tuesday and Friday so please tap Follow on the main episode page, so they’ll be ready for you in your app. 

You can reach out to me with ideas for the show or guest suggestions here. Thanks so much fo

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

Connect with us on Facebook or Instagram  

Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen

For many people food is a non-issue. They eat regular meals, snack when they feel the need, indulge now and then but don’t beat themselves up about it. But some people develop a strange relationship with food – often one that started in adolescence. It may start innocently enough – a fad diet, a decision to go “gluten free” or become a vegan. But, as we learn in our discussion with Dr. Marcia Herrin in today’s episode, for kids with a genetic predisposition for eating disorders, it doesn’t take much to set the wheels in motion. She gives us advice on what we can do to help keep an eating disorder from “taking hold” of our teens and tweens and what to do if despite those efforts, we find our child in the grips of a disorder.

Dr. Marcia Herrin is a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist with a Masters of Public Health from UC Berkeley and a Doctorate of Nutrition Education from Columbia University. She’s a Fellow of the Academy of Eating Disorders, having been bestowed the honor for significant contributions in the field of eating disorders. Dr. Herrin is a Clinical Assistant Professor of Pediatrics at the Geisel School of Medicine at Dartmouth, teaching future pediatricians about eating disorders and is the founder of Dartmouth College’s nationally renowned eating disorder treatment program for college students. She also runs a private practice in New Hampshire for the treatment of eating disorders in adolescents and adults. She’s also the author of The Parent’s Guide to Eating Disorders and Nutrition Counseling in the Treatment of Eating Disorders.

 Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here
 
"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know w

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

Connect with us on Facebook or Instagram  

Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen

The broad range of violence that teenagers inflict on one another is staggering. Dating violence, sexual violence, bullying, cyberbullying, physical assaults, gun violence, suicide, verbal violence, hate speech and emotional abuse. 

Of course, the physical violence is most terrifying for parents. Middle schoolers carrying guns and knives. Fights breaking out at ballgames, parties and in the halls at school. What’s going on here? How is it that someone so young is capable of inflicting such harm on another person? What causes this seemingly callus behavior? What can we do to protect our kids from becoming involved or falling victim? What do we say beyond, “be careful”, and what can we do as parents and as a community to help decrease this violence? 

Join me in this episode for a look at teen violence; how it originates, how it perpetuates, how to help stop it (and protect our kids and others in the process).

 Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you love about the show. 

If you’re listening in Spotify, you can also rate the show by going to the main episode page and tap the 3 dots to the right of the follow button, tap rate show and tap the 5th star!

Thank you in advance for helping me help more parents!

I drop new episodes every Tuesday and Friday so please tap Follow on the main episode page, so they’ll be ready for you in your app. 

You can reach out to me with ideas for the show or guest suggestions here. Thanks so much for listening!

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

Connect with us on Facebook or Instagram  

Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen

Self-compassion may not yet be a household term, but it turns out there’s some very persuasive research regarding the positive impact of this fairly simple practice. It appears to be a powerful way to combat “self-negativity”. 

And who among us tends to be the most self-critical, filled with self-doubt, and internalized negativity? That’s right, adolescents. Their brain is changing in such a way that makes them super self-conscious and prone to negative emotions. They also face enormous stress, which often leads to anxiety and depression. But perhaps worst of all, they think they’re the only one who feels the way they do.

Today in episode 35, I talk to Dr. Karen Bluth, a researcher at the University of North Carolina who studies self-compassion and how it influences adolescents’ emotional wellbeing. Listen in and learn how this simple yet powerful practice can potentially help your teenager flip the switch in their brain to become more positive, resilient and motivated and less stressed, anxious and depressed.

Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you love about the show. 

If you’re listening in Spotify, you can also rate the show by going to the main episode page and tap the 3 dots to the right of the follow button, tap rate show and tap the 5th star!

Thank you in advance for helping me help more parents!

I drop new episodes every Tuesday and Friday so please tap Follow on the main episode page, so they’ll be ready for you in your app. 

You can reach out to me with ideas for the show or guest suggestions here. Thanks so much for listening!

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

Connect with us on Facebook or Instagram  

Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen

If you’ve never been bullied, you’ve at least known a bully or seen one in action. And a teenage bully with the internet and a cell phone at their disposal is about as bad as it gets. Teens and tweens are still gradually learning to have empathy for others – it’s not an innate ability. That’s one of the reasons we see kids treat each other so badly, so often. And, again, the internet just makes it that much easier to be a bully. 

The statistics are pretty grim. At least somewhere close to half of all adolescents have been the target of cyberbullying. Kids telling each other to “just go kill themselves” seems almost commonplace.

Would you know if your teen was bullying someone online or was the target of such cruelty? Do you know what your school’s policy is on cyberbullying or what the law says? Would you know what to do if your child were being bullied online? And what role do you play in preventing your child from being the bully?

Join me this week to learn what you need to know about cyberbullying to make a difference in your teen or tween’s life.

 Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here 

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you love about the show. 

If you’re listening in Spotify, you can also rate the show by going to the main episode page and tap the 3 dots to the right of the follow button, tap rate show and tap the 5th star!

Thank you in advance for helping me help more parents!

I drop new episodes every Tuesday and Friday so please tap Follow on the main episode page, so they’ll be ready for you in your app. 

You can reach out to me with ideas for the show or guest suggestions here. Thanks so much for listening!

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

Connect with us on Facebook or Instagram  

Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen

Be sure to first listen to episode 32, Teens, Sexting, Revenge Porn, and Sextortion (Yikes), before coming back here to episode 33. Last week we learned about teens, sexting, revenge porn, and sextortion. And in the first part of today’s episode, we’ll discuss how to talk to them about these issues (see download below). In the second part of the episode, we’ll talk about the potential legal ramifications for teens who choose to sext, including the very real possibility of being charged with possession or distribution of child pornography.

Grab the Episode 33 Free bonus download: “Talking to Your Teens About Sexting”. The Guide discusses 3 things you need to remember if a sexting issue arises, specific things to tell your teen about sexting, how to handle different sexting scenarios (like finding a nude photo on your teen’s phone) and the signs to watch for in case your teen is being cyberbullied (sextorted or revenge porn). Be sure to click the link above and grab the download today - it's time to talk.

Download my Free guide, "Talking To Your Teen About Sexting"

Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you love about the show. 

If you’re listening in Spotify, you can also rate the show by going to the main episode page and tap the 3 dots to the right of the follow button, tap rate show and tap the 5th star!

Thank you in advance for helping me help more parents!

I drop new episodes every Tuesday and Friday so please tap Follow on the main episode page, so they’ll be ready for you in your app. 

You can reach out to me with ideas for the show or guest suggestions

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

Connect with us on Facebook or Instagram  

Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen

It appears that at least 15% of teens have sent a "sext" and at least 27% have received (at least) one. And 90% of teens and tweens believe that most everyone else is sexting. The scientific data on this issue is still in its infancy (as is the phenomenon itself) but from all appearances, many teens accept this new form of communication as part of their sexual exploration.

It also appears our teens are fully aware of the risks but continue to do it anyway (like many other risky activities). Revenge porn and sextortion are a couple of significant consequences that have devastated too many sexting teens. 

We can’t guide our teens through these sexting, cyberbullying and criminal issues unless we’re well aware and familiar with them ourselves. Join me in this episode as we discuss the prevalence of sexting among teens, why they do it, the specific risks involved and how we should think about it and deal with it as parents.

Download my Free Guide, "Talking To Your Teen About Sexting"

 Show Notes and Transcript

Find our FREE Parenting Guides Here

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm so thankful for your podcast! ...I'm so happy I discovered it!" Speaking of Teens Listener

^If you feel the same way, please consider rating and reviewing my show! This helps people know the show is worth their time to listen. Tap here, to go to Apple podcasts, and scroll down until you see the STARS to tap on the last star, then tap on “Write a Review” and let me know what you love about the show. 

If you’re listening in Spotify, you can also rate the show by going to the main episode page and tap the 3 dots to the right of the follow button, tap rate show and tap the 5th star!

Thank you in advance for helping me help more parents!

I drop new episodes every Tuesday and Friday so please tap Follow on the main episode page, so they’ll be ready for you in your app. 

You can reach out to me with ideas for the show or guest suggestions here. Thanks so much for listening!

Check out PARENT CAMP - a cohort-based, 10-week experience that includes a virtual course, in-depth exercises and tools, and weekly live meetings with Ann, where you will learn how to strengthen your relationship and decrease the conflict with your teens and tweens (while improving their behavior.)

The 5-Day Reboot: From Conflict to Cooperation - receive bite-sized lessons in your in-box for 5 days that will make a huge difference between you and your teen...for under $50!

Check out the podcast on YouTube!

Email Ann at [email protected] 

Connect with us on Facebook or Instagram  

Read Speaking of Teens weekly articles on Substack   

Join our Facebook Group for Free Support for Parents and others who care for Teens (and get easy access to all the parenting guides above!)

See My Recommended Books For Both You And Your Teen