Lori joins Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale to discuss the common issues that
result in a mid-life or “gray” divorce.

About Lori Schade:
Lori Schade is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and AAMFT approved therapy
supervisor running a therapy practice in Pleasant Grove Utah called Compassionate
Connections Counseling. She specializes in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy and
supervises therapists towards certification in the model. She has been an adjunct faculty
member in the Marriage and Family Therapy Department at Brigham Young University as well
as Utah Valley University. For over three decades she has practiced therapy alternately with
raising seven children and has published several peer reviewed materials related to her
profession. In her spare time she enjoys running, traveling, tandem bike riding with her
husband, knitting and playing the organ. She is convinced the grandchildren are one of life's
best kept secrets.

Insights:

• “There's always hope. I have a very easy time being hopeful for married couples, sometimes I have to say, ‘borrow my hope.’ I actually got that from Dr. Rebecca Jorgensen. And I think it's so lovely. And a lot of times small changes bring about really large changes in dynamics in marriage.” - Lori Schade
• “There are two kinds of commitment. One is personal commitment, where you feel free to exercise where you want to put your loyalty. The term is kind of like restraint. It's actually called constraint commitment, and constraint commitment are all of those variables that keep people feeling stuck. It might be religious beliefs, it might be children in the home, it might be financial constraints, but there are those things where people might divorce but they stay there because they feel these barriers to divorce? And so sometimes at midlife, those are removed. And so I think it's quite possible that that's also why we might see a resurgence of divorce and at that time.” -Lori Schade

Invites:

• Find time in your week to have a connection check-in with your partner by asking these three questions. How connected are we from last time we checked? More or less or the same? What's been happening in our lives that may have impacted the level of connection? What is one small thing that would help me feel more connected?"
• Reach out to a therapist to learn more about Emotionally Focused Therapy to see if it could potentially strengthen your relationship with your partner.

Lori’s Links:

Compassionate C

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

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Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

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Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

Ariel joins Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale to discuss the complex dynamics of sex
in a relationship and how women can feel empowered in their sexuality.

Sign up for Ariel's FREE MASTERCLASS NOW THRU February 12, 2024: https://outlook.office.com/mail/safelink.html?url=https://ladiestalkinglove.com/masterclass&corid=6a8a53f5-c147-1b8a-d10f-5cc24b4e1cb5

Starting February 5, 2024 earn a special $20 discount from using this link: https://ladies-talking-love.ck.page/products/womens-sexuality-course-registration?promo=DAVE

About Ariel Finlinson:

Ariel Finlayson is a women's sexuality educator and the host of the ladies talking love podcast.
She recently earned her master's in Human Development and Family Studies at Utah State
University. A native of northern Wisconsin, she can't get enough of forests or fresh squeaky
cheese curds. Her online course from pressure to passion empowers women to live up to the
joy and fulfillment they deserve in their relationships. She is currently living in Utah with her
husband, Kyle, and their four young children.

• Insights:
  “I think just recognizing number one, that it is a really important part of your relationship to foster. And then number two, that it isn't all of your relationship but with that connection and sex, you are going to be able to have a more thriving and flourishing and beautiful empowering relationship than you thought possible.” -Ariel Finlinson 22:38-22:57
• “To ask ourselves as women "Where did I get my information?" Where did I get this belief that sex is for men, for instance, or that ‘good girls don't,’ right? Many of us have heard through them  years? Where did I get that information? And can I explore something different?” -Dr. Liz Hale 28:44-29:00

Invites:

• Download Ariel’s free resource, “10 Questions to ask your spouse about Sex”
• Find a time to discuss with your partner the stereotypes that you believe are affecting your relationship.

Ariel’s Links:
Instagram: @ladies.talkinglove
Website: https://www.ladiestalkinglove.com

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

StrongerMarriage.org
podcast.strongermarriage.org
Facebook: StrongerMarriage.org
Instagram: @strongermarriagelife

Dr.

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

Natasha joins Dr. Dave Schramm and Dr. Liz Hale to talk about the struggles that
women face with feelings of inadequacy and simple tips to overcoming these feelings.

About Natasha Dansie:
Natasha offers concrete tips and real life examples of everyday interactions that often lead to
mothers thinking they aren't enough. Natasha Dansie is a certified family life educator. She has taught relationship education classes through Utah State University for the past 11 years,
working with a variety of audiences from high school students and retreats for women to
inmates in the maximum security unit and everything in between. She loves traveling, learning
and snuggling. Natasha and her husband Jeff are raising their five children ages 7 to 19
alongside a variety of farm animals in central Utah.

Insights:

• “It's hard to be grateful and resentful.” -Dr. Liz Hale
• “Observe and then serve.” -Dr. Dave Schramm
• “One of the actions that I've personally seen the power of in my own life is the intentional practice of gratitude. So when I feel my stuff, my brain starts slipping into this negative vortex that starts to get dark. And I just have to pause. And when I start practicing gratitude, it's like, I can reverse the effects of that.” -Natasha Dansie

Invites:

• Find a moment to pause after you have a feeling of inadequacy.
• If someone shares the way that they are feeling, instead of stating why they shouldn’t be
  feeling that way, validate their feelings by saying something like, “that must be really
  difficult” or “I see how you could feel that way.”

Natasha’s Links:
Email: [email protected]
Instagram: @natashadansie

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

StrongerMarriage.org
podcast.strongermarriage.org
Facebook: StrongerMarriage.org
Instagram: @strongermarriagelife

Dr. Dave Schramm:

https://drdaveschramm.com

https://drdavespeaks.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSU

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Facebook Parenting Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/542067440314642

Dr. Liz Hale:

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

Tyler joins Dr. Dave Schramm to talk about the challenges of addiction and shame in
marriage and the skill set required to overcome addictions with a stronger marriage connection.

About Tyler Patrick:

Tyler is a Marriage and Family Therapist has dedicated his career to mastering and
understanding of recovery from sexual addiction and betrayal trauma. He has come to believe
that the men and women who embrace and live the principles of recovery do far more than get
their lives back. They become the best kinds of husbands and wives, fathers and mothers. He
has been married for over 20 years to an incredible woman and as a father to four amazing
daughters. His hobbies away from work include supporting his children's interests, fly fishing,
backpacking, and training River, his German Shorthaired Pointer.

Insights:

"I'm going to pursue a life where I understand what's going on in my mind and my heart, and
then choosing to live from that sort of centered, sort of gut place. And then that allows me to
live my life on, you know, on life's terms, if I'm having a bad moment, I can trust that I have the tools to do that. I can trust that I'm human.” -Tyler Patrick

“When you have two people who know who they are and can be vulnerable with one another,
and they choose to be with one another. That's where the deepest levels of connection
happen.” -Tyler Patrick

“If you're sitting there listening to this feeling like it's hopeless or it's dark, it's not, your story is not finished. It's just begun and you're sitting on a goldmine if you're willing to do the work.” -Tyler Patrick

Invites:

• Check out the podcast of Brian and Tyler
•  Sign up for a first free session with Tyler.
• Talk with your partner about the importance of humility and honesty in your
  relationship.

Tyler’s Links:

Website: https://lovestrong.com
Instagram: @the.wandering.therapist

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

StrongerMarriage.org
podcast.strongermarriage.org
Facebook: StrongerMarriage.org
Instagram: @strongermarriagelife

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

On today’s episode of the stronger marriage connection, Dr. Chelom Leavitt, J.D., Ph.D., will explore with Dr. Dave and Dr. Liz how to intentionally slow your mind and body to build awareness and create better connection during sex.

About Chelom Leavitt:

Dr. Chelom Leavitt, J.D., Ph.D. teaches in the School of Family Life at Brigham Young University. Dr. Leavitt received her Ph.D. from Penn State where she focused her research on how mindfulness is linked to sexual functioning and satisfaction. Dr. Leavitt’s findings have been published in top research journals and books. Her research has helped uncover what couples experience during sex, and what factors contribute to connection. Along with her work in Sexual Mindfulness, Dr. Leavitt hosts interventions that teach couples how to slow down and be more aware and create greater connection during sex. She regularly blogs for Psychology Today as well her website www.chelomleavitt.com, where she shares with readers the latest research on meaningful sex, slowing down to experience greater connection, and being more curious in romantic and sexual relationships. Dr. Chelom Leavitt is married to David Leavitt and they are the parents of nine children.

Insights: 

• Chelom: Slow down, be gentle and be curious.
• Dave: Media does not portray sex correctly, making time to breathe, slow down, and raise awareness will benefit your relationship in all ways.
• Liz: Normalizing emotions in our life and bringing awareness can increase our sexual pleasure and lives.

Invites: •

• Practice the mindful embrace and heads together exercise Chelom discussed with your partner.
• Start mindfulness exercises. The next time you have 2 minutes of breathing room, sit down, practice how it feels to just breathe and be. Implement this routine more and more into your schedule.
• Notice what happens when you are physically connecting with your partner. A hug can tell you a lot about how your relationship looks and what you and your partner need.

Chelom Leavitt Links: 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sexualmindfulnessproject/

https://www.chelomleavitt.com/

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

StrongerMarriage.org
podcast.strongermarriage.org
Facebook: StrongerMarriage.org
Instagram: @strongermarriagelife

Dr. Dave Schramm:

https://drdavesc

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

On today’s episode of the stronger marriage connection, Dave and Liz with Tammy
Hill, educator, LMFT, ASSECT, and author discuss how to overcome rejection, desire difference,
and stale sex. Explore new ways to replenish your partner and build beauty in your sexual
connection.

About Tammy Hill:

Tammy Hill is passionate about strengthening marriage relationships. She is a Licensed
Marriage and Family Therapist and an active member of the American Association of Sexual
Educators, Counselors and Therapists (ASSECT). Tammy enjoys being an adjunct faculty
member at Brigham Young University in the School of Family Life where she teaches hundreds
of students each semester in Marriage Preparation, Marriage Enhancement and Healthy
Sexuality in Marriage courses. Tammy owns a private counseling practice where she largely
works with couples. She has free resources available on her website
(http://www.tammyhill.com) where she also offers numerous Making Love Retreats,
Honeymoon Workshops and Dating Bootcamps each year. Published in 2021, Tammy’s first
book, “God Made Girls and Boys” is a beautiful children’s book addressing agency, gender,
accountability, and hope in our Heavenly Parent’s eternal plan. Her second book, “Replenish:
Creating Sexual Fulfillment in Marriage”, was published earlier this year. Most importantly
Tammy is forever grateful to be a wife, mother and grandmother.

Insights:

Tammy: Humans are created with a capacity to have amazing sexual pleasure. Push yourself to
learn how to replenish each other.

Dave: Make time to intentionally have sex with your partner.

Liz: Monogamous does not have to mean monotonous.

Invites:

• Instead of waiting for your partner to change, recognize the part you play in
  conflict and seek to change it without any guarantee that your partner will do the
  same. You may find that your partner’s response to your change is exactly what you
  hoped.
• Examine whether there is contempt in your relationship. If you “horibilize” your
  partner by objectifying them and only seeing their faults and their weaknesses, you
  might be guilty of contempt.
• As yourself, “ If I were to give my whole heart to my partner, what would it occur
  to me to do?”. Be still and then heed that inner call to connect

Tammy Hill Links:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tammy_hill_lmft/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/replenishyourmarriage

Podcast:

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas. Today, Liz, Dave, and Rex share family traditions, memories of celebrations past, and relationship insights.

December is a time of celebration for many that include cultural traditions. The holidays can be many things for many people: great joy, chaos, solemn reflection or new beginnings. Join us as we discuss Christmas memories, traditions, and share some tips to help you navigate your relationship during the holidays. 

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

StrongerMarriage.org
podcast.strongermarriage.org
Facebook: StrongerMarriage.org
Instagram: @strongermarriagelife

Dr. Dave Schramm:

https://drdaveschramm.com

https://drdavespeaks.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSU

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Facebook Parenting Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/542067440314642

Dr. Liz Hale:

http://www.drlizhale.com/

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

Rex joins Dave and Liz today to discuss tips for managing In-laws and family gatherings.

Relationships with extended family can be tricky or sometimes difficult and anxiety inducing. Dr. John Gottman says, "Every marriage is a cross-cultural experience." Whether we come from similar cultures or not, together we create a brand new culture within our new families. 

The holidays bring opportunities to spend time with our extended family. Though these gatherings can bring many emotions to the service, here are four tips to help settle in and make the best of the time for you and them.

1. Speak Kindly: Speak kindly to your partner about their family and friends. Share concerns or issues with a compassion mindfulness and heart.
2. Get Curious: When you bring an open curiosity to your family gatherings, you can learn things about your extended family, your spouse, and yourself. Being curious also creates the opportunity for bids for connection and leads to relationship building. People love to share stories, likes, and things about themselves. So take a moment to get curious about your extended family and treasure the experience.
3. Lean In: Leaning in creates situations where everyone can be included and participate in a comfortable way. It's a good idea to prepare at least one activity, topic, or item to bring to the gathering that will get everyone wanting to contribute or participate. This could be a simple game, social activity, food or recipe or possibly even a toy of some sort. When the moment arrives, rise to the occasion and lean in.
4. Plan Your Exit: Sometimes we can only contain so much joy at family gathering before problems may arise. Have an exit plan or strategy in place so that you and your spouse can discretely signal each other that you have reached your quota or are ready to go. This can be a fun and relationship building exercise for you and your spouse. Rex shares a strategy and code for "I am ready to go" that he and his wife have developed over their marriage.
5. Avoid Contentious Conversation Topics: It's usually best to avoid discussing religion and politics at social gatherings. And if you have a family member that enjoys sharing advice, listen with a curious mind, but be ready to respond politely. Some examples might be, "That is interesting, I will have to think about that." or "That's a good idea, but we're going to do it this way." or "Thanks, but this seems to be working for us right now."
6. Beware of Criticism: We may be able to tease our own family, but when someone else mentions a criticism it can be trigg

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

Stacy Goulding joins Dr. Dave Schramm to discuss how she is able to help educate youth about reproductive health. She also shares some tips for couples to have positive intimate relationships.

About Stacy Goulding:

Stacy is a licensed health educator that has spent the last decade teaching at-risk youth about
reproductive health. She's passionate about preparing couples for a positive intimate
relationship in their marriage. She believes everyone deserves comprehensive research based
information about how the body works. Thus her true intimacy class was created. She's
currently developing a class for parents to teach kids of all ages about healthy sexuality. She also was a wellness coach specializing in women and postpartum wellness. In addition to teaching Stacy loves cycling, dancing, kayaking, pickleball and classic rock. She resides in Utah with her husband and two sons.

Insights:

“And it's really simple. And you can also approach it from, ‘where do babies come from,’ and
you start small and grow with your kids' development.” -Stacy Goulding

“I think overall being authentic is really important. It's okay to tell your kid I've never given a sex talk before where I wasn't given the sex talk before or I'm feeling nervous, because this is my first time or I don't want to say it wrong. But you can say those things. And just say, but this is so important, I think it is worth going through the awkward or the uncomfortable to discuss this.” -Stacy Goulding

"It's not like "Don't do it, it's bad!". It's like "No, sex is amazing when there are proper boundaries and values in place." Especially with teens right now, they want to know "why?". There are not just listening to Mom & Dad said so, they don't care. So giving them the "why?" really matters. "Hey I want you to have this in the future. Let's get there through this healthier and safer path." -Stacy Goulding

Invites:

• Look at the courses that Stacy has to offer on her website.
• If you have children, start today by talking positively about their bodies and the ways
  that you show affection with your partner.
• Learn about consent and how you can implement asking for consent in your relationship
  or marriage.

Stacy's Links:

https://stacylyncoaching.com/

instagram: @stacylyn_coaching

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/ 

Laura Parry joins Dr. Dave Schramm to discuss tips that help couples to transition to
parenthood. Laura shares her insight and experience on how partners can support each other
during this stressful time.

About Laura Parry

Laura holds a Master's of Social Work from the University of Utah, and in 2019 became certified in perinatal mental health. In addition to helping clients through the perinatal period, she enjoys working with those experiencing faith transitions. She earned a clinical yoga certification in 2021 and loves using the healing power of yoga, nature and therapy for clients and for herself. She lives in Lehi with her husband, three kids, two cats, and one dog and loves reading, hiking and playing the piano.

Insights

• “I would want people to know that your relationship can not just survive, but you can thrive even if there's been a change and relationship and faith in religion.” - Laura Parry
• “I also want women to know that this is a vulnerable time for them, it can be a hard time,
  obviously, it comes with a lot of excitement and joy to hopefully, but that they're allowed to feel the whole range of emotions that come with a transition as big as having a baby.” -Laura Parry

Invites

• Check out the resources at rootsbranceswellness.com
• If you’re preparing to have a baby, sit down with your partner to talk about the SHRIMP
  acronym and talk about your expectations for when the baby arrives.
• Learn more about understanding faith transitions by talking with someone who has gone or is going through one.

Laura's Links

https://www.rootsbrancheswellness.com

Instagram: @_lauraparry

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways:

StrongerMarriage.org
podcast.strongermarriage.org
Facebook: StrongerMarriage.org
Instagram: @strongermarriagelife

Dr. Dave Schramm:

https://drdaveschramm.com

https://drdavespeaks.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DrDaveUSU

Facebook Marriage Group: 

Visit our site for FREE relationship resources and regular giveaways: 

Strongermarriage.org  

Podcast.stongermarriage.org

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@StrongerMarriageLife

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@strongermarriagelife

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/strongermarriagelife/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/strongermarriage/

Facebook Marriage Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/770019130329579

Dr. Dave Schramm: 

http://drdaveschramm.com

http://drdavespeaks.com

Dr. Liz Hale: 

http://www.drlizhale.com/