Could you  expand on these words "people are safe with the person who is prepared to hang out in the discomfort feelings and see what's going on there because it means no wars are started. To try and find peace within us, the war within us is identified and then peace."

https://tatyanasussex.substack.com/p/beauty-q-and-a-with-clare-dimond?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email#play


From Tatyana: 

Dear Beautiful Friends,

Are you ready for a mini-PhD in reality, freedom, and the awakened life—with some laughter thrown in?

Meet my beloved teacher, guide, coach, friend, and playmate of the past three amazing years, Clare Dimond. I’m going to introduce her by going straight to the very last question I ask in my Beauty Q&As, because Clare’s answer is so 🤯 and 🐒 and 😱 and 💫 with a little 🧚‍♀️ thrown in.

Clare is not nihilistic nor misanthropic; she is a teacher and author in the field of non-duality, an understanding that addresses (in a nutshell) the nature of reality and pokes at the truth behind suffering and the separate self. You might call it intimacy with all things, the Oneness of life. Clare’s groups and teachings are conversations that point in the direction of what it means to be alive in our bodies as infinite awareness and unconditional love.

Something like that! I have been learning/working/studying/playing with Clare in this space for three years and still come up short with the right language to describe this field of exploration and awakening. 

*Because we don’t need a reason to be happy to be alive, and any reason we come up with is only true for a fleeting moment, then it changes.

Let’s cut to the good part shall we? WATCH THE VIDEO

We slowed down, went past the 20 minutes limit and explored beauty, how it is an unconditional quality of life and can be a portal to awakening, freedom, expansion.

We also talked about:

• What is Beauty & Does It Matter?
• The Artist’s Way
• Positive affirmations
• Is the natural world calling us to be a collaborator in life?
• Being a human in a troubled world—how the hell do you cope?
• Going deep with our fears about global issues
• What does the world want from us?
• How to rhumba on the playfield of life.
• Mystery as beauty, beauty as mystery.
• How does a non-dual philosophy teacher & author play?
• Distinctions between work & play, clients & friends.

Is it possible to have a good relationship with someone who is really traumatised. My partner had a terrible childhood and a lot of addiction as a consequence. They frequently have bouts of great anger and times of withdrawal from me. Is there a way through this for us to a healthy relationship 

On your podcast on 9th August you said that “the body is the judge.” I don’t know that I’ve heard it said that way. Could you talk more about that?  

Perhaps some details — I am wondering what there is for me to see in the severe pain that is felt in my body /- especially in my hands and wrists. More than that too, some itching and just all the other things that come and go. 

There have been insights around the tightness and contraction with regards to limited beliefs/stories/ideas or critical ways of seeing the world. I’ve been aware of that for years. And meeting and greeting the pain with compassionate awareness, if pain is here is that indicative of judgement and gee how can that ever stop or be different? 

Reading your book ‘it’s not you and it's not me'. Please help me clarify exactly what you are saying and navigate my situation. I am in love with a woman let’s call her Ann. I think about her all the time. I get jealous when she talks about other men. I get upset if she doesn’t want to see me. This feels like love to me. There have been other women in my life who I haven’t felt that with . Are you saying the relationship with Ann is a play out of trauma and it is not with the other women? How can that be and what does it mean to be in love then if it is not to want to be with the other person all the time. .

Looping back to jiu jitsu again (also a metaphor for other things. And a complete mirror for me) - I’m tempted to say, well, it’s me who has decided that this is good for them. And clearly, it’s just not their thing. Let’s try another activity. Or no activities. And that’s probably true on some level, I suppose. But I’m also feeling that they haven’t actually experienced really doing jiu jitsu. Because they have been so caught up in “I don’t like going with this particular kid. They always go too hard. Why don’t I win medals? I’m too tired. That coach doesn’t like me,” and on and on and on.  So it doesn’t feel clean or right to say just quit at this point. But they seem to be moving further into the story with increasing struggle, and my suggestions or attempts to “explain what’s really going on here” (shockingly) have not been helpful. Also, won’t this cycle just repeat itself with the next activity they try? So I guess that’s my question… Can I help a little kid come more into reality? 

And now after writing all of that, it’s seeming like I should just keep using this as a mirror. 

Coming back to reality myself - the concept of the space within which everything, including shame and pain arises - how can attention  notice both?