In any classroom, conflict happens. And that’s an understatement—conflict occurs every day, all day long. Research shows that in Pre-K classrooms, 60 acts of intrusion occur per hour. If you want to save time for learning and connection, teaching conflict resolution to young children is essential. With Conscious Discipline, we foster a willingness to resolve conflicts by building a School Family. Then, we teach healthy conflict resolution skills like composure, assertiveness, and recognizing and managing triggers.

Join Master Instructor Vicky Hepler as she leads a session on teaching conflict resolution in early childhood on this special episode of Real Talk for Real Teachers. With 37 years in education, Vicky draws on a wealth of experience as she shares actionable strategies, activities and coaching tips for transforming conflict and chaos to connection and cooperation.

Essential Takeaways

• For conflict resolution to be effective, we must foster the seeds of willingness by establishing a School Family. From there, we can teach even the most challenging children to resolve conflicts in a healthy manner.

• Conflict is an opportunity to teach children a better way to communicate, resolve problems and meet their needs.

• Children are developmentally programmed to seek help from adults. When a child tattles, he or she is telling us, “I need help. I don’t know what to do.” This is an opportunity to teach children how to use their assertive Big Voice.

• With their Big Voices, children teach others how they want to be treated, a vital lifelong skill.

• We teach children to use their Big Voice in the moment that conflict occurs. We also help them identify triggers and find strategies to use when they are triggered. Don’t forget to celebrate when your students use their Big Voice!

Important Links

• ConsciousDiscipline.com (https://consciousdiscipline.com/)

• Master Instructor Vicky Hepler (https://consciousdiscipline.com/professional-development/instructors/vicky-hepler/)

• Webinars from the Field: Conflict Resolution and Assertiveness with Older Children with Kristin Abel (https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/webinars/conflict-resolution-and-assertiveness/)

• Article- Getting Over the Finish Line: Teaching Children to Use Their Big Voices (https://consciousdiscipline.com/getting-over-the-finish-line-with-big-voice/)

Product Mentions

• Creating the School Family (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/creating-the-school-family/)

• Shubert’s BIG Voice (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/shuberts-big-voice/)

• Sophie’s BIG Voice (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/sophies-big-voice/)

• Shubert Visor (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/shubert-visor/)

• Conflict Resolution Time Machine (https://consciousdiscipline.com/product/conflict-resolution-time-machine/)

Show Outline

0:20 What is Conscious Discipline?

1:15 Introduction of guest Vicky Hepler

2:20 Planting seeds of willingness for conflict resolution

3:12 Conflict happens all the time and is a teachable moment

5:30 Responding to tattling by teaching assertiveness (Big Voice)

9:30 Ideas for introducing conflict resolution to young children

11:12 Helping young children identify their triggers and how to respond

13:02 “Make your voice match mine”

14:59 Coaching in the moment

18:17 Celebrating when children use their Big Voice

19:44 What’s Becky up to?

20:33 What’s Becky celebrating?

THANK YOU FOR LISTENING

There are many ways you could have spent this time today, but you chose to spend it with me and I am grateful. If you enjoyed today’s show, please share it with others via your favorite social media platforms.