Tom thinks simply telling families, "they had a good day," dispatches nothing. He challenges us to have a story to tell or a beautiful image of the child to share. Mike has observed how choosing photos to share with families offers teachers a chance to pause and reflect. Joey finds that broadly painting things as a "good day" washes over the challenges and hard work that are part of every school day. Ross points out that sometimes there have been lengthy conversations that have happened in the background and we shouldn't judge the "good day" check in out of context.

Ross takes us on a deep dive into the art of teaching. How do we respond when children's big play tips into dysregulation that takes over the group? Tom talks about taking responsibility when we decide to stop play. Joey reminds us that helping children stay regulated requires us to also be regulated, which can be hard to do in a chaotic environment. Mike thinks of a bell curve depicting regulation. Ideally, we can help children re-regulate before they slide over the top of the curve.

How does it feel when the bad guy shows up in play? The children are often eager to have the villain enter. Are we ready to welcome them?

Our brains are wired to remember "that one time" that the bad thing happened. How can we use our negativity bias to power reflection instead of restriction? What about when "that one kid" did that thing? Does that mean we never offer it again? To anyone?

Mike reflects on how the physical arrangement of a space can support children's ability to focus and build inhibitory control. Cold puddles on the floor are a terrible distraction when children are trying to get cozy with a book. Classroom design that helps children find focus also helps children be themselves. Mike and Ross riff on how providing focus does not mean that children's experiences are limited to any one developmental domain.

Last week's discussion about beauty in conflict has Ross thinking about the mess that can also accompany conflict and the value within it. Tom has observed that children are engaged in continuous non-verbal negotiation, which can get messy. Mike makes a musical connection between mess and creativity. Joey wonders if we can learn to prepare ourselves for the mess and always have the right "cleaning supplies" handy.

Squabbles over dinosuars, golden kitties or deeper issues are necessary and beautiful. When we rush in to solve children's conflicts, we make it all about us. Resolving conflict is an open-ended activity that can lead to creativity. Early childhood settings are a great place for learning to solve conflicts because they are usually low stakes.

We'll be back for real next week! Until then, one more from the archives:

Ross is losing sleep after being too helpful. Did he take away a learning opportunity by attaching the wheels to a child's car? We offer help with the best of intentions, but perhaps our help sometimes undermines development. What kind of help do they need? (originally released June 2023)

Ease into the new year, with a relaxing conversation about hanging out.

Tom asks the group to define hanging out--a social act of "being with" with no agenda, a relaxed feeling, open, and freeform. He wonders, is it worthwhile in the classroom? (Resounding YES) Ross points out that you don't have to set your plans aside to allow for moments to hang out, you can make space for both. Tom's wish is that we can slow down and appreciate moments of hanging out in our daily practice.

As Joey was reminded while crawling through cattails, joining in to children's physical play can give us insight, understanding, and joy. Mike recently learned the tricky balance spots in a playground obstacle course. And we all remember how much fun the kids had when Tom "fell" off the balance beam. Ross cautions—yes, but it shouldn't become about us. When do we join into children's play and how do we phase out?