One of Tom's pet peeves is when grownups greet children with compliments centered on their appearance. Mike sees it as similar to relfexively saying "good job." Ross points out that attempts to build self-esteem could actually wind up undermining self-worth. Joey wonders about the child who plans their outfits and initiates the interactions about clothing. The conversation leads Tom to an insight about the importance of helping children reflect on their strengths and accomplishments.

Ross worries about children who can't find their autonomy because adults are always helping them do things (like zippers, of course). Tom shares a recent experience of his grandson learning to shuffle while he patiently waited. Mike proposes a model of "learned coorperation" instead of learned helplessness. Joey can't find the term she is looking for, but it's the thing that Ross is talking about.

Joey turns to Tom and Mike to help sort out some logistical challenges related to running. Children love to run, but in some conditions it can lead to hyper-competitive racing, pushing, and crashing. Together they brainstorm ideas to help make room for everyone and allow the children to continue to find joy in running.

A recent experience at a children's museum has Mike thinking about the conditions for play. What invites us into a flow state? How is it different for adults than for children? Can we find flow in both work and play? Mike talks about how he gets the ideas flowing when he has writer's block. Tom remembers how fun it was to play with boxes and table when he built sensory apparatus.

Tom's grandson came over to help fix his fence last weekend. This got Tom thinking about children doing real work. How can experiences with real work be successful for the child AND the adult? What about when the job has to be done right? Mike remembers working with pie crust scraps as his mom made the real pies. Joey looks for jobs that are helpful even when they're not done perfectly. Intent and approximation are what we need.

Ross reflects on the value of slowing down as we build relationships at the beginning of the school year. Joey knows the FOMO feeling that can happen as teachers want to try out all their good ideas. Tom suggests that we "live the routine" with flexibility as we figure out what everyone needs. If we charge through everything, we might miss the beautiful moment where a child offers an injured bee a flower blossom.

Joey's gathering ideas for building relationships with children in a way that doesn't rely exclusively on language. The list gets started: sharing their perspective, connecting children with other children, taking the "temperature" during greetings, playing near them, narrating not interrogating, and making faces. Tom points out how barriers can actually invite interraction and Joey brainstorms a box door that she wants to prototype.

All the talk of danicng in the last episode has Mike thinking about drumming. He suggests the metaphor of teacher as drummer, setting the foundation for the group. (We can't resist a good metaphor!) When things are flowing nicely, the drummer can even drop out and the group keeps playing along.

Refreshed from a summer break, the group is ready to dive into deep thinking with Tom. He's brought some light reading to decipher. What does it mean to correspond with children versus interact? Ross's school dance analogy is just the thing to help everyone understand.

Tom's parking cars at the State Fair, Joey and Ross are busy setting up classrooms, and Mike is prepping for another possible podcast (more later). Enjoy this encore eposide in the meantime!

What happens if you create the conditions where children know they can try things vs. run a classroom where children are allowed to do things? It's a subtle difference that can lead to a stance of curiosity and appreciation. It can be as simple as the set up for how children access paint or having towels easily available for messy play. (Originally aired September 2022)