That's Helpful with Ed Stott

Does manifesting work? Neuroscientist Professor Joel Pearson says yes! Here’s why… 

By this point we’re all familiar with the concept of manifesting & if you’re listening to this podcast I’m guessing you’ve tried it too.

But as you know our little self improvement club is FIRMLY backed by science - so what does it say?

Professor Joel Pearson is a neuroscientist who’s been studying how the brain processes unconscious information for 25 years. He explains why it works, what’s happening in our brains when we do it & how we can make the process even more powerful.

Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected] CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram Find Prof Joel on Instagram & via his website

BOOKS The Intuition Toolkit 

PODCASTS 5 Essential Rules for Using Your Intuition

TIMESTAMPS

00:00 Introduction and Definition of Manifesting 02:19 Priming: Changing Perception and Making Information Salient 06:27 The Role of Priming in Manifesting 10:16 The Power of Mental Imagery in Manifesting 13:11 The Influence of Self-Talk in Manifesting 17:42 The Impact of Visualization Abilities on Manifesting 20:45 The Benefits of Optimism in Manifesting 23:39 The Illusion of Material Possessions 26:26 Avoiding Mistakes in Manifesting 30:21 The Influence of Placebo Effect and Priming 37:19 Belief and Self-Identity in Manifesting

Being the hardest worker doesn’t always pay off. So how do we channel all of that time and effort into something that does? 

Well Claire Seeber is the author of Less Hustle, More Happy. She’s a career consultant who’s spent the last 16 years in HR across many roles & multiple countries, she’s had a front row seat watching the difference between the people who get ahead & those who don’t. 

Spoiler alert - it’s often not the hardest worker, nor the most technically qualified that’s rising to the top - Claire has unlocked the blueprint for being valued, seen and fulfilled at work & she’s identified those unhelpful career habits that may well be the reason why you’re stuck feeling incredibly busy but not necessarily satisfied.

Got a career question for Claire? Email me - [email protected] CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram. Find Claire on Instagram or via her website

BOOKS Less Hustle, More Happy

Where does your kids' temperament come from, how strict should you be & is it okay to be a 'good enough' parent? Honestly, the last few months have truly humbled me - being a parent is HARD and with so much advice out there, it’s VERY tricky to know what’s best for your children. So what IS good for your kids?

Luckily, Dr Norman Swan has done the work for us - from birth to ten years old in his new book So You Want To Know What’s Good For Your Kids. If you’re an Aussie, you’ll know his name - he trained in pediatrics and he’s also a dad, so he knows the struggle!!

We talk through some of the biggest takeaways - everything from where our kids' temperament comes from, how to strike the right balance when it comes to discipline and what it means to be a ‘good enough parent’.

Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected] CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram.

BOOKS So You Want To Know What's Good For Your Kids

TIMESTAMPS

00:00 Introduction and Challenges of Parenting 05:15 Learning Your Baby and Parenting for Life 08:10 Crying Babies and the Evidence Behind It 10:32 The Importance of Pregnancy and Breastfeeding 15:31 Breastfeeding and Introducing Solid Foods 19:09 Introducing Solids and Allergies in Children 23:34 Understanding Your Child's Temperament 27:29 The Canvas of Genes and Environment 29:18 The Importance of Consistency and Setting Expectations 34:09 The Concept of 'Good Enough' Parenting 38:01 The Impact of Parental Match Fitness 40:08 Cleaning the House and Order in Parenting 43:37 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

 

Aging can be a fairly daunting experience & when the topic comes to mind most of us try to move on  and clear it from our thoughts as quickly as possible.

But award-winning journalist Melissa Doyle is urging us to take an active role in aging to push back against ageism and make the experience healthier and more connected for us all.

In this conversation Mel shares her aging toolkit & the lessons she’s learnt from the experts on how to normalize aging and embrace some of our most challenging and transformative years. Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected] CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram. Find Mel on Instagram⁠ & via ⁠her website.

BOOKS How To Age Against The Machine

So often we prioritize romantic relationships above all others - whether it’s searching for a ‘soul mate’, choosing who we spend our time with or who takes priority in our lives…But according to Rhaina Cohen, the idea that a romantic partner is the only kind of relationship that can fulfill our emotional needs and bring meaning to our life is an incorrect one.

 Rhaina is an award winning producer and editor for NPR and she’s the Author of The Other Significant Others: Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center.

Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected]

CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram. Find Rhaina on Instagram⁠ & via ⁠her website.

BOOKS The Other Significant Others: Reimagining Life with Friendship at the Center

TIMESTAMPS

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:00 - The relationship that made Rhaina re-think friendship

00:02:28 - The similarities between falling in love

00:03:46 - The hierarchy of relationships

00:07:00 - Why the phrase ‘just friends’ is BS

00:09:23 - What defines a relationship when sex doesn’t

00:10:10 - What we’re missing out on by not prioritising friendship

00:12:50 - The lessons romantic relationships & friendships can take from each other

00:14:54 - The scripts of relationships

00:17:17 - How to make deep friendships

00:20:10 - Other people’s reactions to close friendships

00:22:00 - Friendship break-ups

00:24:42 - How to nurture friendships to deepen them

00:27:00 - Reimaging friendship can help reinvent your life

00:29:57 - Dealing jealousy over close friendships

00:32:49 - Marriage is not a monopoly on closeness

 

When it comes to role models, toddlers may not be the first people you think of. Their reputation for tantrums, impulsivity, distractedness and general chaos doesn’t put them at the top of most people’s list. But Hasan Merali says you’re wrong.

He’s a pediatric emergency doctor and the author of Sleep Well, Take Risks, Squish The Peas: Secrets from the Science of Toddlers for a Happier and More Successful Way of Life.

In this episode, he shares some of toddler's ultimate life hacks that could help everything from your work, to your relationship with food and even sleep! Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected]

CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram. Find Hasan on Twitter & via his website.

BOOKS Sleep Well, Take Risks, Squish the Peas

TIMESTAMPS

00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:10 - Why are toddlers great role models?

00:03:00 - The masters of learning and building relationships

00:04:05 - Why toddlers’ poor reputation is unfounded 00:05:14 - Why toddlers’ brains are different to adults 00:07:15 - Lessons in laughter

00:09:19 - Finding joy 00:10:47 - Being kind 00:13:08 - Asking questions

00:16:06 - Setting boundaries

00:19:30 - Talking to yourself in the third person 00:23:10 - Toddlers are the ultimate intuitive eaters

00:26:51 - The sleep routine

 

Back in 2015, journalist Gemma Hartley wrote an article for Harper’s Bazaar that went viral. The article was about emotional labor & it really hit home for so many people - in fact 2 BILLION people read it. It led to Gemma writing a book on the topic & coming up with some real solutions to this incredibly familiar experience. Gemma is the author of Fed Up; Navigating & Redefining Emotional Labour For Good.

CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram. Find Gemma on Instagram⁠ & via her website.

BOOKS Fed Up; Navigating & Redefining Emotional Labour For Good. Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected] TIMESTAMPS

00:00:00 - Intro

00:00:55 - The Mother’s Day that led Gemma to write the book

00:03:30 - What is emotional labor?

00:06:35 - Society assumes women are the default parent 

00:08:00 - The mindset of ‘helping out’ 

00:10:40 - What happened when Gemma’s husband became the full time at home parent

00:12:30 - The response to ‘stop being such a control freak’

00:15:00 - Setting shared standards

00:19:00 - Emotional labor for men in the dating period

00:21:12 - Why Gemma no longer asks for ‘help’ at home

00:25:11 - How to explain the problem without it becoming a fight

00:30:18 - Why taking on the emotional labor can make partners’ lives richer

00:33:15 - Having the expectation that this is going to require more than a single conversation

00:36:16 - Taking on the emotional labor of addressing emotional labor (!!)

00:40:30 - It’s okay to leave if someone isn’t meeting you where you are

 

Often we see so many traits & behaviors as directly tied to our morality - including those around how we look, feel, think and act. But journalist & author Rebecca Seal says many of the things we’ve been told are bad are actually just as useful as the good. Her latest book is called Be Bad, Better: How Not Trying So Hard Will Set You Free. Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected]

You can also find the video version of the podcast on Youtube here. CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram. Find Bex on Instagram & via ⁠her website.

BOOKS Be Bad, Better: How Not Trying So Hard Will Set You Free

ARTICLES Rebecca’s original article for The Guardian PODCASTS Unlearning Shame with Dr Devon PriceHow to Work Solo without Losing Your Mind

TIMESTAMPS 00:00:00 - Intro

00:01:24 - Rebecca’s own experience with perfectionism

00:11:39 - Why not trying so hard is empowering

00:18:00 - Why certain behaviors are tied to morality

00:27:10 - Embracing laziness 00:33:30 - Mindlessness over mindfulness

00:37:48 - Getting comfortable with negative emotions 00:48:00 - Accepting being human

00:50:50 - Where did these thoughts come from in the first place? 00:52:20 - Manufactured insecurity

Grief is one of those things that many of us still have no idea how to talk about. Whether we’ve lost someone or know someone who has lost someone it can be very uncomfortable to know what to share, when & even how to just broach the subject. This struggle is one Cariad Lloyd knows well.

After losing her dad at 15, she says she only really started to understand her grief when she was 34 and pregnant and decided to start her award winning podcast Griefcast. Running since 2016, the podcast has helped a whole host of people to process & verbalize their grief & Cariad’s book encompasses some of those lessons. Cariad is a comedian & author of You Are Not Alone.

Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected]

CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram. Find Cariad on Instagram⁠ & via her website.

BOOKS You Are Not Alone

PODCASTS Griefcast The Grief Gang Good Mourning TIMESTAMPS 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:30 - What is the grief club? 00:02:30 - Why did Cariad start Griefcast in 2016?

00:06:00 - What enabled Cariad to start to grieve?

00:08:30 - Myths about grief

00:10:30 - Victorian time limits on grief

00:12:24 - What is grief? 

00:14:20 - The physical sensations of grief

00:16:20 - How processing grief changed Cariad

00:18:19 - Grief never goes away & that’s okay

00:24:09 -  Why the 5 stages of grief are complete BS

00:30:30 - Dual process theory

00:34:00 - Why we should all be talking about death more

00:38:00 - What to say & do for someone who’s grieving

00:44:05 - The best thing to do / say if an acquaintance loses someone

 

We all know how essential a good night’s sleep can be for our health, but whilst we might be prioritising our bedtime routine, our partner’s night time habits may be the thing that’s costing us a perfect night’s sleep.

Whether they’re a champion snorer, elite level fidgeter or they just have a completely different sleep schedule to you - it doesn’t take much to affect our eight hours. So what can we do about it? How can we sleep better as a couple & is it time for a sleep divorce?

Dr Wendy Troxel, is licenced clinical psychologist specially trained in sleep medicine & a senior behavioural scientist at the RAND Corporation think tank and the author of Sharing the Covers: Every Couple’s Guide to Better Sleep. Want to become a podcast sponsor, got some feedback for me or just fancy a chat? Email me - [email protected]

CONNECT WITH US Connect with ⁠That's Helpful on Instagram. Find Wendy on Instagram & via ⁠her website.

BOOKS Sharing the Covers: Every Couple’s Guide to Better Sleep TIMESTAMPS 00:00:00 Intro 00:01:11 Why this is Wendy’s area of expertise 00:02:17 What does the research say about sleeping together or separately? 00:04:30 How men & women sleep differently 00:07:45 The benefits of sharing a bed 00:10:35 How we’ve slept throughout history 00:12:53 How important sleep is to our relationship 00:14:30 When to re-evaluate sleeping in the same bed 00:18:30 How to start experimenting with sleep as a couple 00:23:40 The stigma against night owls 00:27:28 Why we should see sleep as a social behaviour 00:31:51 Sleep as a public health issue 00:32:48 How to manage pets & kids in the bed 00:38:00 The one thing to take away 00:39:39 Sleep & morality