The Anxious Love Coach

Trigger warning: this episode is a story. It is chock-full of triggers, pain, grief, mentions of death, blood, and gore. If you've experienced miscarriage and there are some sore spots and tenderness, I might wait until you've gotten enough support to grieve before listening to this. In this episode, I share a recent loss, and how I've coped with it through ritual, embodiment, and dark humor. I'll also share the incredible things it taught me about love, loss, and letting go...

This may not be a "relationship anxiety" episode, but for those of you who are willing to traverse with me to a darker, messier place, I'm hopeful you'll gain metaphorical, transferable lessons on self-trust from a story where I go deeper than I've ever been able to go before... you may find it applies to you deeply still if you have ever loved.

Get a personalized video response: wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE.

Who we are: Natalie Kennedy @Anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

8:15 - Finding out that I was pregnant

13:15 - Dealing with my miscarriage

30:04 - Surrendering to and trusting the universe in the midst of fear

48:00 - My feelings after the miscarriage

1:00:01 - Gratitude as a response to adversity

I entered my relationship "knowing" Preston was the one... but then, years in, I stopped knowing anymore! In this episode, I speak to the younger version of myself that was struggling horribly with relationship anxiety. Some of you are in this place and I want to remind you that A) you're not alone, and B) you don't need to suffer with this forever. There are tools to give you clarity and support you with your doubts and fears.

Get a personalized video response: wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE.

P.S. Thanks so much for your support after my last episode... I am feeling much better. I plan to speak on my experience more in a separate episode. But for now... I'm so grateful for my life and want to keep going.

Also, I tried to make a shorter episode and failed 😄 OH WELL

Who we are: Natalie Kennedy @Anxiouslovecoach

In this episode, I'm sharing a vulnerable story and a recent personal loss... and what it has taught me. I want to share how loss, pain, grief, and disappointment are portals to the divine... if you will let them be so.

Get a personalized video response: wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE.

Who we are: Natalie Kennedy @Anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

4:15 Relationship anxiety as a spiritual calling

7:25 If you want to be comfortable with anxiety, you must be comfortable with loss and feeling "naked"

16:00 The myth of "when you know, you'll know"

29:00 Being free of anxiety means you just say "yes'" to what is

30:25 How to be with disappointment

38:15 Both Feet In - Abridged

Are you feeling an intense urge to break up right before Thanksgiving or winter break? You're not alone. It's actually very common! In this episode, I outline some common reasons behind holiday break-up urges and what you can do instead.

Patreon:

Patreon will be closed starting 8/16/2026. Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE.

Get a personalized video response: wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Who we are: Natalie Kennedy @Anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

3:00 Breaking up and coming back to my partner during the holidays

7:40 How the holidays can bring up difficult feelings about your relationship

13:00 Wanting control over your life

19:40 What to do when you have breakup urges during the holidays

28:04 Earlybird discount for the upcoming Both Feet In coaching program

If you:

-are with someone struggling with relationship anxiety/ROCD and want to do your part...

-were broken up with because of someone's RA...

-are struggling with RA, but want to see what your partner's "work" is...

-want to look at your RA from an outsider's perspective...

... then this episode is for you!

Links:

Submit a Wisio here

Next Irvine, CA donations class - movement, breath, discussion, lunch

Irvine Oct 29 10am PST

NEXT PATREON CALL:

Nov 5 @ 11am PST Exclusive content + monthly coaching (my husband is jumping on at 150 patrons and we are SO CLOSE.)

Time Stamps:

4:26 Being the most attracted to my partner when he was more selfish

7:51 Your partner's relationship anxiety is not your fault/this person is wounded and trying to resolve their issues through you

12:40 Tools for a person whose partner has relationship anxiety

15:14 Keep focusing on yourself

20:00 Become ok with them leaving

24:10 Let control and let your partner be without trying to fix them

28:15 There is always the option to leave

31:12 You can still stay out of their inner process while still staying in the relationship

36:50 Don't try to control your ex-partner if they break up with you by telling them they have relationship anxiety

39:23 My upcoming Both Feet In program in January

In this episode, my friend and other relationship anxiety practitioner, Chelsea Horton over at Healing Embodied, and I share our counter-cultural relationship beliefs that have served us well and brought us deep peace in our long-term partnerships.

This episode was recorded as a joint effort - meaning it showed up on both our podcasts, and there is no formal host. Enjoy 🙂

Links:

Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE:

https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/both-feet-in-2024

Overhaul, my 1 on 1 relationship anxiety program: https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/work1-1

Ask me a question: https://www.wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

7:00 Taking a non-entitled perspective on relationships

12:00 Creating a culture of gratitude in your relationship

14:30 #1 saying thank you to your partner even if you deserve what he/she gives

16:00 #2 I receive what I am given (say yes to what is

25:05 #3 I don't need my partner to have similar interests to me in order to be happy

40:15 #4 I "settled" and I am deeply fulfilled (redefine what settling means to you)

46:55 #5 Trying to make my partner what I think they should be is not love, it is control

50:55 #6 I am 100% responsible for my own aliveness and pleasure

1:01:00 #7 I am okay with my partner not being perfect and fully evolved

I really should have titled this, "10 ways Natalie is controlling." Ha! I hope you enjoy this episode. If you want to practice trusting your partner more, I give you 10 examples of ways to do this based on mistakes I've made. Listen to this episode, save your energy and breath and grant yourself relational/marital peace.

Links:

Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE:

https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/both-feet-in-2024

Overhaul, my 1 on 1 relationship anxiety program: https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/work-with-me

Ask me a question: https://www.wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

2:45 Thinking of my unsolicited feedback as helpful

5:00 The difference between letting go of control and tolerating disrespect

7:56 Trying to control my partner's bedtime and waking time

16:06 Policing my partner's food choices

18:01 Coaching my partner when we are out having fun

20:01 Undoing what my partner does and redoing it

21:40 Sending my partner relationship advice

24:00 Making sure that my partner did what his mother asked of him

25:20 Telling my partner how to act towards his friends

26:45 Controlling how my partner cooks

29:00 Trying to have my partner open up and have a deep conversation against his will

31:55 Trying to get my partner to be more present with me

39:30 Hosting a mindful movement class in Orange County

In this episode, I share how the lack of sisterhood/brotherhood/community can contribute to relationship anxiety and dissatisfaction, and how to cultivate it.

Links:

Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE:

https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/both-feet-in-2024

Overhaul, my 1 on 1 relationship anxiety program: https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/work-with-me

Ask me a question: https://www.wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

5:00 Losing the passion in your relationship

8:10 The importance of a brotherhood and sisterhood

11:00 Attempts to fill the relationship void with outside sources

15:59 Unworthiness wounds and how they prevent us from accepting love

17:30 Your man will never understand what it's like to be a woman and you will never understand what it's like to be a man

20:30 How a lack of sisterhood can lead to nitpicking

24:30 The Anxious Love Coach Patreon

In this episode, I share a simple question that will help you ground yourself in reality, and actually move forward with life, if you're stuck on the fence over your relationship.

Links:

Relationship Anxiety Alchemist, Conscious Communication Course, Quit Comparing Your Relationship Challenge, Evoke his Devotion 1 on 1 program has been closed and discontinued.

Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE:

Overhaul, my 1 on 1 relationship anxiety program: https://www.anxiouslovecoach.com/work-with-me

Ask me a question: https://www.wisio.com/anxiouslovecoach

Time Stamps:

2:48 Wanting to control or change my partner in order to continue in the relationship

3:58 Disclaimers about abusive relationships

7:56 Dealing with resentment in your relationship by "being on the fence"

9:45 Reasons we feel like we need to be in control of our partners

10:25 What to do when you're on the fence

13:05 A question you can ask yourself if you're on the fence

In this episode, I talk about the curvature of expectations held in marriage/partnership over the centuries, and how in this day and age, it is beneficial, in some ways, to lower your expectations. I also address the "alpha male" and "high value man" conversation, and why we ought to be cautious and discerning about it. If you wish your partner was more spiritual or brought home more money, this episode will bring you some perspective, and how lowering your expectations will paradoxically open you up to receive MORE than you ever dreamed of in your partnership.

Links:

Relationship Anxiety Alchemist, Conscious Communication Course, Quit Comparing Your Relationship Challenge, Evoke his Devotion 1 on 1 program has been closed and discontinued.

Both Feet In is my community where you can access my core relationship anxiety relief curriculum, with PDFs, videos, audios, calls with me 2-3x/month, and a community feed to make connections with others on the same journey as you. Access that HERE.

New link for work 1:1 with me here.

Time Stamps:

3:00 Being happy with a loving, nonabusive, stable partner

5:25 Having both masculine and feminine sides to yourself

7:23 Ways I would "test" my partner in the past

16:00 Wanting your partner to "be more masculine"

18:12 The dangers of seeing your relationship as a competition

25:25 My thoughts on the new Barbie film

32:00 Social messages telling us to be extraordinary

33:23 Holding a desire for the life that you want vs. having expectations of your partner

36:50 The feminine will always want more

39:45 Don't compare your nuanced relationship to a polarizing fantasy