In this week’s episode, I’m sharing a personal update as my son turns 18 and we navigate the realities of conservatorship, independence, and what the future holds. It’s bittersweet, and it has me reflecting on the very real fears autism parents carry about what comes next for our children.

To support you in this, I’m replaying an earlier episode on anticipatory anxiety—the fear of what might happen in the future, and how it drains us without preparing us. You’ll hear a client story, practical tools for calming your nervous system, and why staying grounded matters more than trying to control the uncontrollable.

What you’ll learn in this episode:

• Why anticipatory anxiety is so common for autism parents
• How fear of the future shows up in your body and your energy
• A real-life example of a mom preparing for her child’s blood work
• Practical tools for calming your nervous system before stressful events
• Why accepting “hard” as part of the journey can actually bring relief

If you’ve ever caught yourself bracing, white-knuckling, or walking on eggshells about what’s ahead—this episode is for you.

After a summer break, I’m back with a fresh perspective — and a pep talk to help you head into the new school year with more calm and confidence.

Whether your summer was packed with activities or you let the schedule breathe a little, there’s value in what you did — and what you didn’t do. Resting is work, and sometimes it’s the most productive thing we can do for ourselves and our kids.

In this episode, I share:

• How to reframe school disruptions, refusals, and hiccups as information instead of failures

• The mindset shift that has helped me (and my clients) ride the roller coaster of a school year without bracing for the worst

• The SINGLE reminder I want you to keep front of mind when things feel overwhelming.

I’ll also tell you how to get my Back-to-School Guide — 7 tips I’ve used myself and shared with clients to set them up for a smoother transition.

All-or-nothing thinking, or being rigid, is generally defined by pairs of opposites. So, maybe you’re thinking of someone or something as simply good or bad, working or not working. But it can also show up as thinking there are only two choices available in a situation. And this comes up in so many areas of our lives.

While cognitive rigidity is a characteristic of Autism, it is also alive and well in all of us to some degree. In fact, as parents, the more stressful our lives become, the more we tend to rely on the safety of all-or-nothing thinking, becoming more rigid as a result of this thought process. So, what can we do about it?

Tune in this week to discover where rigid all-or-nothing thinking is impacting your parenting, and what you can do to manage it. I’m sharing why our brains love this way of processing the world around us, and I’m showing you how to see the thoughts that are leading you down the path of this either-or mindset.

• Why all-or-nothing thinking is a default for all human beings.
• How this cognitive rigidity might be showing up in your life right now.
• The thought patterns that lead to all-or-nothing thinking.
• What you can do to manage your mind when you find yourself stuck in all-or-nothing thinking.

To the untrained or inexperienced

eye, tantrums and meltdowns usually look very much the same. If

something looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and talks like a duck,

you are going to conclude it’s a duck. But when it comes to tantrums and

meltdowns, this isn’t the case.

Although tantrums and meltdowns may look similar,

they are actually very different. However, the fact that they appear

similar can create a lot of misunderstanding and suffering for us as

moms of children with Autism. So how can you tell whether your child is

having a tantrum or a meltdown, and how do you deal with them

appropriately while being conscious of other people’s opinions? That’s

what I’m teaching you in this week’s episode. 

In this episode, I share

the similarities and differences between tantrums and meltdowns, help

you normalize the experience of an Autism meltdown, and assist you in

dealing with individuals who may not understand. Discover how to think

about and respond to the different behaviors your child exhibits, some

of the thoughts that may come up when your child is having a tantrum or a

meltdown, and how to use what I’m teaching you this week to be an

ambassador for parents of a child with Autism.

• Some of the typical behaviors that appear in both tantrums and meltdowns.
• Why a meltdown is not a teachable moment.
• How to deal with Autism meltdowns in a way that helps both you and your child. 
• Why so many people associate screaming, yelling, and uncooperative behavior with a bad kid, or a bad parent. 
• How to tune out other people’s opinions of your child’s meltdown.

You’ve heard the phrase “make the most of summer.” But for autism moms, this often translates into do more work with less support and zero downtime.

In this episode, I’m sharing my own journey of how I used to treat summer like a catch-up bootcamp for my son—drills, flashcards, workbooks, and more. I explain how this approach, fueled by fear of regression and pressure to “keep up,” ended in stress, dysregulation, and disappointment for both of us.

You’ll hear:

• The hidden anxiety behind “making the most” of summer
• How fear of regression can sabotage your best intentions
• What to do instead: setting small, achievable goals
• Tips for engaging your child without turning your home into a summer school
• Why your energy matters more than any worksheet

If you’re bracing yourself for the summer months, this episode will help you rethink your expectations and shift into a mindset that supports both your child’s growth and your well-being.

Resources:

Schedule a consultation: https://theautismmomcoach.com

In this week’s pre-Father’s Day episode, I am bringing you my conversation with Rob Gorski, otherwise known as The Autism Dad.

Rob discusses his experience of navigating solo parenting three boys on the Autism spectrum.

In this episode, you will learn:

• The biggest problems that dads of children with Autism face.
• Rob’s philosophy of doing your best and knowing that’s always enough.
• Some of the challenges posed by our kids with Autism transitioning into adulthood.

And so much more. Tune in now & soak up Rob’s pearls of wisdom.

In this episode, we dive into the realities of creating summer plans for an autistic child. I share a personal story about navigating summer camp schedules, extended school year (ESY) services, and the curveballs that come with being an autism mom.

This story reminds us that autism parenting requires constant adjustment. And that even when things go sideways, we always find a way to make it work..

✅ How to prepare for the unpredictable summer shift as an autism family.

✅ Why it’s essential to build flexibility into summer plans for an autistic child.

✅ How coaching can help you manage stress, pivot, and support your child effectively.

• Creating summer plans for an autistic child can be an overwhelming time for autism parents, with ESY schedules, camps, and co-parenting logistics creating complex routines.
• No matter how well you plan, unexpected issues (like sudden childcare changes or unexpected home visits) can derail your plans.
• Flexibility and resilience are essential tools for autism parents to navigate summer challenges with confidence.

Tune in now!

P.S.  Feeling overwhelmed?

Download my free Meltdown Action Plan (MAP).

P.P.S. Want to learn more about my coaching program?

Book a consultation call to explore how we can work together to support your child and your family.

In Episode 169 of The Autism Mom Coach Podcast, Lisa Candera—a lawyer, life coach, and autism mom—explores the concept of expertise in autism parenting and why you are the expert on your child. Using the example of the Karen Read retrial, Lisa explains that expertise isn’t just about degrees and certifications. It’s about lived experience and practical knowledge.

This powerful concept applies directly to autism parenting. Parents of autistic children accumulate valuable, practical knowledge through years of firsthand care. These parents are uniquely positioned to understand their child’s needs, behaviors, and challenges.

• What the Karen Read retrial reveals about the meaning of expertise.
• The difference between credentials and real-world experience.
• Why you are the expert on your autistic child.
• How to trust your instincts and build confidence in parenting.

Whether you’re navigating IEPs, therapy options, medical decisions, or everyday challenges, this episode will help you trust your own expertise.

• 00:00 – Introduction to The Autism Mom Coach
• 00:41 – A True Crime Obsession
• 01:50 – The Battle of the Experts
• 03:22 – Credentials vs. Experience -- You've Done Your 10,000 hours
• 04:53 – You Are the Expert on Your Child
• 06:17 – Trust Yourself as a Parent
• 07:59 – Conclusion and Next Steps

You can listen to this episode on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favorite podcast platform.

👉 Visit The Autism Mom Coach to learn more and connect with Lisa.

The Meltdown Action Plan -- Download it Here: https://mailchi.mp/theautismmomcoach.com/map

Autism meltdowns are intense, overwhelming, and often misunderstood—not just for the child, but for the parent as well. In Episode 168 of The Autism Mom Coach Podcast, Lisa Candera shares a groundbreaking, trauma-informed tool designed specifically for autism moms who feel frozen, reactive, or helpless during their child’s dysregulation.

Introducing the Meltdown Action Plan—a step-by-step, easy-to-follow framework that gives parents the tools and structure they need to stay calm and take purposeful action during meltdowns.

Drawing on her personal experience as a solo parent to a teen with autism and her work with hundreds of coaching clients, Lisa explains how to shift from crisis-driven reactions to empowered parenting with her signature MAP Method:

• Meltdown Prep
• Action During
• Post-Meltdown Recovery

This episode is a must-listen for every autism parent who’s ever thought:

“I don’t know what to do during a meltdown.”

“Why can't my autistic child just calm down?.”

“Why is this still happening?”

Lisa answers those questions—and more—while offering hope, clarity, and a plan.

Lisa’s new resource includes:

✅ The 3 phases of the MAP Method

✅ Fill-in-the-blank worksheets

✅ Real-life examples from autism moms

✅ Guided prompts to help you regulate yourself before, during, and after a meltdown

👉 Get it here: https://mailchi.mp/theautismmomcoach.com/map

📅 Ready for personal support? Book a free consultation with Lisa here:

https://talkwiththeautismmomcoach.as.me/

00:00 – Introduction to Episode 168

00:23 – Why Lisa Created the Meltdown Action Plan

01:35 – The Real Problem With Meltdowns (Hint: It’s Not Just the Behavior)

03:27 – What Is the MAP Method?

03:55 – Phase One: Meltdown Preparation

04:28 – Phase Two: Action During a Meltdown

05:07 – Phase Three: Post-Meltdown Recovery

06:01 – What’s Inside the Free Download

06:30 – Final Thoughts and Invitation to Work With Lisa

• Why trying to “fix” meltdowns often makes them worse
• The difference between reacting vs. responding
• What meltdowns signal about your child’s nervous system
• The single shift that helped Lisa stop dreading meltdowns and start preparing for them
• How Lisa helps clients create personalized meltdown action plans that actually work

About Lisa Candera:

Lisa Candera is a solo mom to a teen with severe autism and significant aggression. She’s a certified life coach and the creator of The Autism Mom Coach, a coaching program designed to help autism moms regulate their emotions, reduce burnout, and become confident leaders in their homes. With a background in law and over 40 years of lived experience with autism, Lisa brings a unique blend of strategy, science, and soul to every episode.

👉 If this episode resonates with you:

✔️ Subscribe

✔️ Share with another autism parent who needs a plan that works

 In Episode 167 of The Autism Mom Coach Podcast, Lisa Candera—a lawyer, life coach, and solo mom to a teenager with autism—tackles one of the most emotionally loaded questions for autism parents: Should I push my child out of their comfort zone or give them more support?

Using a real-life story from a coaching client, Lisa explains:

✅ Why there's no perfect moment to act

✅ How to treat parenting decisions like experiments

✅ What “friction” actually means in your child’s growth

✅ How to move forward even when things don’t go perfectly

✅ And why sometimes... you have to break some chairs

🎧 This episode is a must-listen if you're stuck in second-guessing or afraid of doing too much (or too little) for your child.

🕒 Timestamps / Chapters:

00:00 – Introduction

00:38 – Follow-up from Last Week

01:13 – Real-Life Moments That Raise the Question

02:20 – The Goldilocks Myth of “Perfect Timing”

03:35 – Coaching Story: Rachel’s School Bus Decision

05:08 – Reframing the Outcome

06:00 – Growth = Try, Monitor, Evaluate, Calibrate

06:52 – Final Thoughts + Coaching Invitation