In this powerful Listener Series episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Andrea, who shares her story of an unexpected pregnancy complicated by severe placenta accreta, a nine-hour delivery surgery, massive hemorrhage, ICU recovery, and a long, complex postpartum healing journey.

Andrea walks listeners through receiving a terrifying accreta diagnosis at her anatomy scan, navigating the fear of life-threatening hemorrhage, and making the critical decision to transfer care to a specialized accreta center. Her story highlights the importance of self-advocacy, multidisciplinary care, and listening to your instincts, especially when your life is on the line.

This episode also tenderly explores the emotional aftermath of survival: delayed bonding after general anesthesia, prolonged separation from her baby, months of physical complications, depression, and the long road to processing trauma once the body finally stabilizes.

In this episode, we discuss:

🤰 An unexpected fourth pregnancy and a shocking placenta accreta diagnosi

🩺 Learning what placenta accreta is and why severity matters

🚩Recognizing red flags and transferring care to a high-volume accreta center

🩸 Preparing for hemorrhage, blood loss, and a planned preterm delivery

😴 Delivery under general anesthesia and emergency hysterectomy

🚨 Massive hemorrhage and receiving life-saving blood transfusions

🏥 Waking up intubated in the ICU after a nine-hour surgery

🧵Multiple surgeries, drains, catheters, and prolonged hospitalization

🖤 Delayed bonding and questioning connection after traumatic birth

💔 Postpartum depression, despondency, and emotional collapse after survival

🧍‍♂️The toll of birth trauma on partners and families

💸 Financial strain, caregiving, and extended medical recovery

🔁 Intrusive memories, rumination, and trauma resurfacing months later

🛋️ EMDR therapy and turning down the volume on trauma

🌱 Redefining gratitude without guilt or toxic positivity

❤️ Advocacy for placenta accreta awareness and blood donation

🗣️ The power of self-advocacy in saving your own life

Key takeaway:

Surviving doesn’t mean you’re instantly okay. Healing after birth trauma often begins after the body is safe and you are allowed to feel grief, anger, and relief at the same time.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

✨ Special Re-Release ✨ Parenting After Birth Trauma

As our children grow, many of us begin to notice something unexpected: the ways our birth trauma continues to show up, not just in our bodies and minds, but in our parenting.

In this special re-release episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, we revisit a conversation that feels just as relevant, if not more so, today. Kayleigh offers a brief but meaningful overview of what it means to parent after birth trauma, and why this topic comes up again and again in our community.

Parenting after birth trauma is layered and complex. It may include unresolved trauma from pregnancy, birth, postpartum, or earlier life experiences, all of which can shape how we bond with, protect, and respond to our children. This episode doesn’t cover everything, but it opens the door to awareness, reflection, and compassion.

Whether you’re parenting a newborn, a toddler, or an older child, this re-release offers perspective for navigating the emotional ripple effects of trauma while raising humans you love deeply.

In this episode, we discuss:

👶 What it means to parent after birth trauma

🧠 How trauma can impact parenting styles and responses

🔗 Bonding and attachment after a traumatic experience

⚠️ Hypervigilance, anxiety, and fear in parenting

🩺 Awareness, support, and treating unresolved trauma

🔧 Parenting imperfections, rupture, and repair

🌸 Practicing self-compassion as a parent and survivor

Key takeaway:

You don’t need to be a perfect parent to be a good one. Parenting after birth trauma is hard, and awareness, repair, and compassion matter far more than getting it “right.”

Why we’re re-releasing this episode:

Because this conversation doesn’t expire. As our kids grow, so does our understanding of how trauma shapes us, and revisiting these topics can be an important part of healing.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this deeply moving Listener Series episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Kailee, who shares her story of infertility, recurrent placenta previa, NICU stays, medical trauma, and ultimately surviving placenta accreta with a life-saving hysterectomy.

Kailee walks us through two high-risk pregnancies marked by hemorrhage, emergency cesareans, prolonged antepartum hospitalizations, NICU stays, and profound grief, alongside moments of advocacy, empowerment, and healing. Her story highlights how trauma can live alongside gratitude, and how reclaiming your voice can be life-saving.

This episode is especially meaningful for NICU parents, those navigating placenta complications, birth trauma survivors, and anyone grieving the birth experience, or future, that was taken from them.

In this episode, we discuss:

💔 Infertility, PCOS, and the loneliness of unanswered medical questions

🩸 Placenta previa and the trauma of sudden hemorrhage

🚑 Emergency transfers, antepartum stays, and fear for survival

💭 The shock of hearing “miscarriage” language during a viable pregnancy

👶 Preterm birth at 31 weeks and a 30-day NICU stay

📉 Delayed bonding, CPTSD, anxiety, and postpartum grief

🌈 Grieving the pregnancy, birth, and moments you never got

✊ Learning to advocate for yourself in future pregnancies

🔁 Facing placenta previa again in a subsequent pregnancy

🧬 Placenta accreta/percreta and preparing for a hysterectomy

🙅‍♀️ The power of saying “no” and trusting your instincts

🩺 Multidisciplinary care and accreta delivery protocols

💗 Meeting your baby after trauma—and reclaiming that moment

🏥 A second NICU journey and coming home sooner than expected

🌧️ Holding empowerment and trauma at the same time

🕊️ Grieving future children while choosing survival

🛋️ The role of therapy, medication, boundaries, and journaling

📸 Why taking photos—even when it’s hard—matters

✨ Finding purpose, advocacy, and hope after medical trauma

Key takeaway:

A birth can be traumatic and empowering. Survival, advocacy, grief, and gratitude are allowed to coexist—and your story still matters, even when the ending looks different than you imagined.

Listener Love:

Kailee’s courage, honesty, and willingness to share the messy middle offers validation and hope to anyone walking through birth trauma, NICU life, or life after hysterectomy.

If this episode resonated with you, you are not alone and healing does not require forgetting what you endured.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

What does it really mean to give yourself permission, especially when you’ve been conditioned to put everyone else first?

In this thoughtful and deeply resonant episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Dr. George James, psychologist, speaker, executive coach, and author of I Give Myself Permission. With over a decade of shared history, Kayleigh and Dr. James reflect on growth, identity, trauma, and the invisible narratives that shape how we show up for ourselves, particularly after birth trauma.

Dr. James shares how the pandemic, racial reckoning, leadership burnout, and family loss shaped his work and inspired his book. Together, they unpack why “just take care of yourself” is not only unhelpful, but often impossible without understanding the systems, identities, and stories we carry.

This conversation is especially powerful for parents navigating birth trauma, clinicians supporting perinatal mental health, and anyone who feels stuck between survival and self-care.

In this episode, we discuss:

🧠 How internal narratives shape what we believe we’re allowed to need

🔑 What “giving yourself permission” really means (and what it doesn’t)

🫧 Why self-care is more than bubble baths and catchphrases

🌍 Social stress, leadership stress, injustice stress, and family-of-origin stress

👩‍👧‍👦 Why parents, especially mothers, are taught to put themselves last

🤰How perinatal trauma reinforces harmful narratives like “the baby comes first”

🗣️Giving yourself permission to advocate for your body and your life

🪞 How identity and lived experience influence permission and self-worth

❤️ Rewriting family scripts around affection, care, and masculinity

😨 Facing fear, perfectionism, and shame in everyday moments

🔄 Why permission is both a mindset and an action

🪜 Taking half-steps when full steps aren’t accessible

⚖️ Acknowledging privilege while honoring that permission is still possible

🔍 Doing the deeper work underneath boundaries and self-care

🤍 Learning to pause, celebrate growth, and notice where permission already exists

Key takeaway:

Giving yourself permission is not about willpower or positivity, it’s about understanding the stories, systems, and stressors that shaped you, and choosing care anyway.

Guest Info:

Dr. George James
Psychologist | Speaker | Executive Coach | Author

• 🌐 Website: georgetalks.com
• 📘 Book: I Give Myself Permission (available wherever books are sold)
• 📱 Social: @georgetalks
• 🔗 More info: igivemyselfpermission.com

If this episode resonated with you:

You are not failing at self-care. You may simply be carrying stories that once kept you safe. Awareness is the first step and permission can start small.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this powerful episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Alex, a mom of two and congenital heart disease survivor, who shares her journey through two high-risk pregnancies and two traumatic births.

Alex opens up about living with complex congenital heart defects, undergoing open-heart surgery as an infant, and entering pregnancy knowing she would always be medically high-risk. Despite meticulous care and expert providers, both pregnancies took sudden, life-threatening turns, illustrating how trauma can exist even when everything is “managed well.”

This episode explores the fear, grief, and lasting impact of emergency medical decisions, general anesthesia during birth, NICU life, and the heartbreak of realizing a redemptive birth may never come.

In this episode, we discuss:

🫀 Living with congenital heart disease and lifelong cardiac care

🤰 Navigating pregnancy as a medically complex, high-risk patient

🩸 Subchorionic hematoma and sub-placental abruption

📉 Severe fetal growth restriction and constant monitoring

🚨 Sudden cardiac crisis at 28 weeks and rapid atrial fibrillation

🚑 Emergency transport, medical chaos, and lack of clear communication

🩺 Cardioversion during pregnancy

💉 Emergency C-section under general anesthesia

👩‍⚕️ Being both a healthcare worker and a NICU parent

🩹 Postpartum recovery after life-threatening birth trauma

🔁 Experiencing pregnancy and birth trauma again

❌ Grieving the loss of a redemptive birth experience

🤝 Healing through community, shared stories, and compassion

⚖️ Learning to hold grief and pride at the same time

Key takeaway:

Survival does not erase trauma. You can be deeply grateful your children are here and grieve how their stories began. Both deserve space.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this clinically grounded episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Kina Wolfenstein, LCSW, therapist, educator, and certified trainer in Coherence Therapy, for a deep dive into a lesser-known but incredibly powerful trauma modality.

Together, they explore what coherence therapy is, how it differs from more familiar approaches like EMDR, CBT, and IFS, and why it can be especially effective for birth trauma, medical trauma, and complex attachment wounds.

Kina explains how coherence therapy views symptoms not as pathology, but as coherent responses rooted in emotional learnings and how true healing happens through memory reconsolidation, an innate brain process that allows those learnings to be updated at the root.

This episode speaks directly to survivors who say, “I understand why I feel this way, but nothing changes,” and to clinicians looking for more precise, bottom-up tools for trauma healing.

In this episode, we discuss:

✨ What coherence therapy is and why so few people have heard of it

🧩 How coherence therapy differs from CBT, DBT, and other counteractive models

💡 What “symptom coherence” means and why it reduces shame

🌊 The difference between top-down and bottom-up trauma therapies

🧠 Memory reconsolidation as an innate brain process (not owned by any one modality)

📚 Why insight alone doesn’t lead to healing

❤️‍🩹 How emotional learnings form and drive symptoms like anxiety, shame, and avoidance

🔁 The role of mismatch and felt-sense experiences in neurological change

🤝 Where coherence therapy overlaps with EMDR and parts work

🎯 Why vague beliefs like “I’m unsafe” are hard to update—and why specificity matters

💔 How birth trauma often activates older attachment-based emotional learnings

😔 Self-blame, worthlessness, and shame after medical and birth trauma

🔧 Why healing means symptoms no longer require constant effort to manage

🌱 How therapists can begin using a coherence lens even without formal training

Guest Info:

Kina Wolfenstein, LCSW
Coherence Therapy Practitioner & Certified Trainer

• 📸 Instagram: @cptsdtherapist
• 🎥 TikTok: @kinacptsdtherapist
• 🔗 Trainings, resources, and practice info available via her link in bio

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this Listener Series episode, Kayleigh is joined by Bella, who courageously shares her journey through infertility, a high-risk twin pregnancy, perinatal depression, placenta previa, repeated hospitalizations, and an emergency C-section at just under 33 weeks.

Bella walks us through the shock of conceiving triplets after one round of Clomid, the grief of losing one baby early in pregnancy, and the fear and uncertainty that followed as complications continued to stack. From significant bleeding episodes and preterm labor to an emergency birth that separated her from her babies, Bella’s story sheds light on the physical and emotional toll of high-risk pregnancy and NICU life.

Together, Kayleigh and Bella explore not only what happened medically, but the lasting emotional impact, including grief over missed milestones, infertility due to medical necessity, and learning how to cope when the birth and motherhood journey looks nothing like what you imagined.

This episode is a powerful reminder that survival does not erase trauma, and that community can be a lifeline.

In this episode, we discuss:

🧪🤍 Infertility, Clomid, and the shock of conceiving triplets

🕊️💔 Early pregnancy loss and the complicated emotions that can follow

⚠️🤰 Placenta previa and what happens when it doesn’t resolve

🧠🌧️ Perinatal depression and intrusive thoughts during pregnancy

🚑🩸 Recurrent bleeding, preterm labor, and extended bed rest

⏱️🏥 A sudden placental abruption and emergency C-section at 32 weeks, 6 days

🚫👨‍👩‍👧 Separation from partner during an emergency birth

🩺🍼 NICU life, steroid shots, and premature twins who beat the odds

🩸⚡ Postpartum hemorrhage and delayed first meeting with her babies

📸💭 Grief over missing first moments and memories

🍼🧊 Exclusively pumping, overproduction, and milk donation

🚫🤰 Being unable to carry another pregnancy and the finality of that loss

💔🌈 Mourning the birth, pregnancy, and motherhood experiences you didn’t get

🤝💬 Finding healing through community, shared stories, and connection

🕯️🗓️ Coping one day at a time through trauma and recovery

Key takeaway:

You can be grateful your babies are here and grieve what was taken from you. Both can exist at the same time, and you don’t have to carry it alone.

If this episode resonated with you:

You’re not broken. You’re not weak. And you’re not alone. Sharing stories like Bella’s helps make space for honesty, grief, and healing in a world that often expects silence.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

What happens when something doesn’t feel right during labor or birth, but you don’t know what to do, who to call, or even what to name it?

In this eye-opening episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Dr. Jennifer Dunatov, a healthcare ethicist with nearly 20 years of experience working inside hospital systems. Together, they unpack what ethics really looks like in labor and delivery and why it’s a vastly underutilized (but incredibly important) resource for birthing people, families, doulas, and clinicians.

Dr. Dunatov shares how becoming a mother herself transformed her work, leading her to focus on birth ethics after hearing countless stories of consent violations, loss of autonomy, and traumatic care. She explains what clinical ethicists actually do, how ethics consults work in real time, and how they can help amplify patient voices even when something has already gone wrong.

This episode is essential listening for anyone who has experienced birth trauma, is preparing to give birth, or works in maternity care.

In this episode, we discuss:

• What healthcare ethics actually is (and why it’s not boring 😉)
• How ethics shows up in labor & delivery and why it’s often invisible
• Common ethical violations in birth, including lack of consent and shared decision-making
• The difference between ethics consults and patient advocacy services
• Whether ethics can be involved after a traumatic or harmful birth experience
• How fear of liability influences provider decision-making
• Why documentation in medical charts matters more than you think
• How ethics consults can lead to accountability and systemic change not just “checking a box”
• Who can request an ethics consult (hint: anyone)
• Exactly what to say if you want to request an ethics consult in the hospital
• Why you don’t need the “right language” to advocate for yourself, your gut is enough

Key takeaway:

If something doesn’t feel right during your care, you are allowed to say so and there are people inside the system whose job is to listen, name the issue, and advocate with you.

Resources & Guest Info:

Dr. Jennifer Dunatov
Healthcare Ethicist | Birth Ethics Advocate

• Instagram: @notraumamama (transitioning to @jenniferdunatov)
• Website: jenniferdunatov.com or notraumamama.com

If this episode resonated with you:

Please consider sharing it with a friend, doula, provider, or loved one. Visibility saves people and knowledge is power.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh sits down with Danielle, a therapist and mother of three, to share a story that challenges the narrow ways we often define birth and postpartum trauma.

Danielle’s trauma did not occur during labor or delivery, it unfolded months postpartum, following what was supposed to be a routine surgical procedure to remove a fibroid. Instead, a cascade of medical complications led to a medical emergency, multiple surgeries, bladder injury, and an unplanned hysterectomy that permanently ended her ability to carry another pregnancy.

Already navigating life with three young children, including a baby under one, Danielle suddenly found herself recovering from a major abdominal surgery, managing a catheter for weeks, and confronting the profound grief of losing her fertility without warning or choice.

As both a therapist and a patient, Danielle brings a deeply reflective lens to this conversation, naming the invisible grief that so often accompanies medical trauma, especially when it doesn’t “fit” neatly into recognized categories of loss.

Together, Kayleigh and Danielle explore:

💔 Experiencing traumatic medical complications in the postpartum period
🏥 How a routine procedure can turn into a life-threatening emergency
🩺 Bladder injury, emergency hysterectomy, and long-term physical recovery
🤍 The grief of losing fertility, regardless of how many children you already have
🧠 Recognizing trauma in real time, even as a trained clinician
🫥 Disenfranchised grief and the pain of not “fitting” into traditional loss narratives
🌪 Navigating recovery while still parenting young children
🌱 What healing looked like years later and why trauma can resurface long after the crisis
🧩 How Danielle’s experience reshaped her clinical work and passion for perinatal mental health

This episode offers validation to anyone whose trauma feels invisible, delayed, or difficult to name and serves as a powerful reminder that loss is loss, trauma is trauma, and none of it requires comparison to be worthy of care."

If you'd like to follow along Danielle's journey - check out her instagram: @themendedmotherhoodcollective

Resources & Links

💜 Connect with Kayleigh: @thebirthtrauma_mama
🌐 Learn more at: HoldingHopePerinatal.com

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Tiffany Lowther, LMHC, a certified perinatal mental health professional and EMDR therapist, for an in-depth conversation about using EMDR to treat birth trauma, postpartum anxiety, OCD-like symptoms, and other perinatal mental health challenges.

Tiffany shares both her professional expertise and lived experience, offering clear explanations of what EMDR is, how it works in the brain and body, and why it can be especially effective during pregnancy and the postpartum period. Together, Kayleigh and Tiffany unpack common misconceptions about EMDR and explain how this modality can support healing without requiring years of traditional talk therapy.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

🧠 What EMDR is and how it helps the brain reprocess birth trauma
🗣 How EMDR differs from talk therapy and CBT
🌊 Why postpartum anxiety, anger, and OCD-like symptoms are often trauma-based
🤰 When EMDR can be helpful during pregnancy, postpartum, or years later
🛟 The importance of safety, grounding, and preparation before trauma work
⏱ Why reprocessing should never be rushed, especially with complex trauma
🧩 Differences between standard EMDR and R-TEP (Recent Traumatic Episode Protocol)
🧘‍♀️ How EMDR supports nervous system regulation, not just memory processing
✅ What good, ethical EMDR care should look and feel like for clients

This conversation is a must-listen for birth trauma survivors, perinatal clinicians, and anyone curious about how neuroscience and trauma-informed therapy can create meaningful, lasting healing.

About the guest:
Tiffany Lowther is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor, EMDR-certified therapist, and perinatal mental health specialist. She works with individuals navigating trauma, anxiety, OCD, and perinatal mood and anxiety disorders, with a strong focus on safety and nervous system regulation.

Resources & Connect:
🌐 Learn more: lowthercs.com
📧 Contact Tiffany: [email protected]

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.