In this Listener Series episode, Kayleigh is joined by Bella, who courageously shares her journey through infertility, a high-risk twin pregnancy, perinatal depression, placenta previa, repeated hospitalizations, and an emergency C-section at just under 33 weeks.

Bella walks us through the shock of conceiving triplets after one round of Clomid, the grief of losing one baby early in pregnancy, and the fear and uncertainty that followed as complications continued to stack. From significant bleeding episodes and preterm labor to an emergency birth that separated her from her babies, Bella’s story sheds light on the physical and emotional toll of high-risk pregnancy and NICU life.

Together, Kayleigh and Bella explore not only what happened medically, but the lasting emotional impact, including grief over missed milestones, infertility due to medical necessity, and learning how to cope when the birth and motherhood journey looks nothing like what you imagined.

This episode is a powerful reminder that survival does not erase trauma, and that community can be a lifeline.

In this episode, we discuss:

🧪🤍 Infertility, Clomid, and the shock of conceiving triplets

🕊️💔 Early pregnancy loss and the complicated emotions that can follow

⚠️🤰 Placenta previa and what happens when it doesn’t resolve

🧠🌧️ Perinatal depression and intrusive thoughts during pregnancy

🚑🩸 Recurrent bleeding, preterm labor, and extended bed rest

⏱️🏥 A sudden placental abruption and emergency C-section at 32 weeks, 6 days

🚫👨‍👩‍👧 Separation from partner during an emergency birth

🩺🍼 NICU life, steroid shots, and premature twins who beat the odds

🩸⚡ Postpartum hemorrhage and delayed first meeting with her babies

📸💭 Grief over missing first moments and memories

🍼🧊 Exclusively pumping, overproduction, and milk donation

🚫🤰 Being unable to carry another pregnancy and the finality of that loss

💔🌈 Mourning the birth, pregnancy, and motherhood experiences you didn’t get

🤝💬 Finding healing through community, shared stories, and connection

🕯️🗓️ Coping one day at a time through trauma and recovery

Key takeaway:

You can be grateful your babies are here and grieve what was taken from you. Both can exist at the same time, and you don’t have to carry it alone.

If this episode resonated with you:

You’re not broken. You’re not weak. And you’re not alone. Sharing stories like Bella’s helps make space for honesty, grief, and healing in a world that often expects silence.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

What happens when something doesn’t feel right during labor or birth, but you don’t know what to do, who to call, or even what to name it?

In this eye-opening episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Dr. Jennifer Dunatov, a healthcare ethicist with nearly 20 years of experience working inside hospital systems. Together, they unpack what ethics really looks like in labor and delivery and why it’s a vastly underutilized (but incredibly important) resource for birthing people, families, doulas, and clinicians.

Dr. Dunatov shares how becoming a mother herself transformed her work, leading her to focus on birth ethics after hearing countless stories of consent violations, loss of autonomy, and traumatic care. She explains what clinical ethicists actually do, how ethics consults work in real time, and how they can help amplify patient voices even when something has already gone wrong.

This episode is essential listening for anyone who has experienced birth trauma, is preparing to give birth, or works in maternity care.

In this episode, we discuss:

• What healthcare ethics actually is (and why it’s not boring 😉)
• How ethics shows up in labor & delivery and why it’s often invisible
• Common ethical violations in birth, including lack of consent and shared decision-making
• The difference between ethics consults and patient advocacy services
• Whether ethics can be involved after a traumatic or harmful birth experience
• How fear of liability influences provider decision-making
• Why documentation in medical charts matters more than you think
• How ethics consults can lead to accountability and systemic change not just “checking a box”
• Who can request an ethics consult (hint: anyone)
• Exactly what to say if you want to request an ethics consult in the hospital
• Why you don’t need the “right language” to advocate for yourself, your gut is enough

Key takeaway:

If something doesn’t feel right during your care, you are allowed to say so and there are people inside the system whose job is to listen, name the issue, and advocate with you.

Resources & Guest Info:

Dr. Jennifer Dunatov
Healthcare Ethicist | Birth Ethics Advocate

• Instagram: @notraumamama (transitioning to @jenniferdunatov)
• Website: jenniferdunatov.com or notraumamama.com

If this episode resonated with you:

Please consider sharing it with a friend, doula, provider, or loved one. Visibility saves people and knowledge is power.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh sits down with Danielle, a therapist and mother of three, to share a story that challenges the narrow ways we often define birth and postpartum trauma.

Danielle’s trauma did not occur during labor or delivery, it unfolded months postpartum, following what was supposed to be a routine surgical procedure to remove a fibroid. Instead, a cascade of medical complications led to a medical emergency, multiple surgeries, bladder injury, and an unplanned hysterectomy that permanently ended her ability to carry another pregnancy.

Already navigating life with three young children, including a baby under one, Danielle suddenly found herself recovering from a major abdominal surgery, managing a catheter for weeks, and confronting the profound grief of losing her fertility without warning or choice.

As both a therapist and a patient, Danielle brings a deeply reflective lens to this conversation, naming the invisible grief that so often accompanies medical trauma, especially when it doesn’t “fit” neatly into recognized categories of loss.

Together, Kayleigh and Danielle explore:

💔 Experiencing traumatic medical complications in the postpartum period
🏥 How a routine procedure can turn into a life-threatening emergency
🩺 Bladder injury, emergency hysterectomy, and long-term physical recovery
🤍 The grief of losing fertility, regardless of how many children you already have
🧠 Recognizing trauma in real time, even as a trained clinician
🫥 Disenfranchised grief and the pain of not “fitting” into traditional loss narratives
🌪 Navigating recovery while still parenting young children
🌱 What healing looked like years later and why trauma can resurface long after the crisis
🧩 How Danielle’s experience reshaped her clinical work and passion for perinatal mental health

This episode offers validation to anyone whose trauma feels invisible, delayed, or difficult to name and serves as a powerful reminder that loss is loss, trauma is trauma, and none of it requires comparison to be worthy of care."

If you'd like to follow along Danielle's journey - check out her instagram: @themendedmotherhoodcollective

Resources & Links

💜 Connect with Kayleigh: @thebirthtrauma_mama
🌐 Learn more at: HoldingHopePerinatal.com

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh is joined by Tiffany Lowther, LMHC, a certified perinatal mental health professional and EMDR therapist, for an in-depth conversation about using EMDR to treat birth trauma, postpartum anxiety, OCD-like symptoms, and other perinatal mental health challenges.

Tiffany shares both her professional expertise and lived experience, offering clear explanations of what EMDR is, how it works in the brain and body, and why it can be especially effective during pregnancy and the postpartum period. Together, Kayleigh and Tiffany unpack common misconceptions about EMDR and explain how this modality can support healing without requiring years of traditional talk therapy.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

🧠 What EMDR is and how it helps the brain reprocess birth trauma
🗣 How EMDR differs from talk therapy and CBT
🌊 Why postpartum anxiety, anger, and OCD-like symptoms are often trauma-based
🤰 When EMDR can be helpful during pregnancy, postpartum, or years later
🛟 The importance of safety, grounding, and preparation before trauma work
⏱ Why reprocessing should never be rushed, especially with complex trauma
🧩 Differences between standard EMDR and R-TEP (Recent Traumatic Episode Protocol)
🧘‍♀️ How EMDR supports nervous system regulation, not just memory processing
✅ What good, ethical EMDR care should look and feel like for clients

This conversation is a must-listen for birth trauma survivors, perinatal clinicians, and anyone curious about how neuroscience and trauma-informed therapy can create meaningful, lasting healing.

About the guest:
Tiffany Lowther is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor, EMDR-certified therapist, and perinatal mental health specialist. She works with individuals navigating trauma, anxiety, OCD, and perinatal mood and anxiety disorders, with a strong focus on safety and nervous system regulation.

Resources & Connect:
🌐 Learn more: lowthercs.com
📧 Contact Tiffany: [email protected]

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh sits down with Kelsea, a mom of three, to share the emotional, terrifying, and deeply transformative story of her son Oliver’s birth and NICU journey a birth she hoped would finally be a peaceful experience after two difficult deliveries, but instead became her most traumatic one yet.

Scheduled for a repeat C-section at 37 weeks due to rising blood pressures and a history of preeclampsia, Kelsea entered the hospital with a pit in her stomach,  a feeling she now knows was intuition. 

The days that followed were filled with fear and uncertainty. Oliver deteriorated quickly, and for 24 hours, doctors weren’t sure what was wrong. Finally, a NICU physician discovered that he had a pneumothorax, a collapsed left lung, and early signs of sepsis. He was intubated, placed on chest tubes, and put under strict no-hold restrictions leading to a heartbreaking stretch where Kelsea couldn’t touch, comfort, or even pick up her newborn son.

Together, Kayleigh and Kelsea talk through:

💔 The trauma of being left out of communication during a crisis birth
🩺 The emotional impact of undergoing sterilization during medical chaos
👶 The shock of seeing your newborn decline — and the terror of hearing “a crucial 24 hours”
🫁 Understanding pneumothorax, ventilation, and NICU stabilization
🤍 The grief of not being able to hold or comfort your baby
🌪 How prolonged NICU stays affect bonding, breastfeeding, and postpartum anxiety
🧠 Navigating postpartum depression, medical PTSD, and extreme anxiety
🌱 Kelsea’s healing journey — from EMDR to ketamine-assisted therapy
✨ What it means to rebuild your life and find moments of joy after trauma

Today, Oliver is home, growing, and defying early predictions  walking, connecting, and meeting milestones doctors weren’t sure he’d reach. But the journey isn’t simple: Oliver lives with mild right-sided cerebral palsy, swallowing challenges, global developmental delays, and ongoing medical needs.

And yet, Kelsea has transformed her pain into purpose. She and her family have given back to more than 100 NICU families, and she shares their story openly to remind others that they are not alone and that healing is possible.

Connect with Kelsea
📸 Instagram: @lifewithmonroe
📧 Email available in episode notes

Connect with Kayleigh
💜 @thebirthtrauma_mama
🌐 HoldingHopePerinatal.com

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh sits down with Dvora Entin, LCSW, PMH-C, therapist, educator, and host of The Misconceptions Podcast, for a deeply honest and compassionate conversation about surrogacy— the hopes, complexities, grief, joy, and emotional labor that shape this path to parenthood. 

Dvora shares what intended parents often navigate beneath the surface: the grief of letting go of a hoped-for pregnancy, the vulnerability of trusting another person with your baby, and the invisible emotional work that unfolds long before birth and long after.

This conversation between with Dvora brings clarity to a journey that is too often misunderstood and oversimplified.

Together, Kayleigh and Dvora explore:

🤍 The emotional realities intended parents face long before choosing surrogacy
💔 The grief and loss that can accompany the decision not to carry a pregnancy yourself
🤝 Building trust, communication, and connection with a gestational carrier
🧠 What trauma, infertility, or past births can bring into the surrogacy process
🩺 The challenges of navigating medical systems when you’re not the patient but deeply impacted
👶 Preparing for birth as an intended parent — the hopes, fears, and unknowns

This conversation shines a light on the emotional complexity of surrogacy — the beauty, the grief, the profound relational bonds, and the internal work that often goes unseen. Whether you’re considering surrogacy, supporting someone through it, or simply wanting to understand it more deeply, Dvora’s story offers validation, insight, and heart.

Resources & Links

🎙 Listen to The Misconceptions Podcast
💜 Connect with Dvora: @parentingwithdvora
💬 Connect with Kayleigh: @thebirthtrauma_mama
🌐 Learn more at HoldingHopePerinatal.com

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

As the holiday season approaches, we’re revisiting one of the most requested and resonant solo episodes of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. In this special re-release, Kayleigh dives into the complex, emotional landscape of navigating the holidays after birth or perinatal trauma,  a topic that so many in our community quietly struggle with, but one that’s rarely talked about openly.

Drawing from her own experience and the countless stories shared within this community, Kayleigh unpacks the many layers that make the holiday season uniquely challenging after trauma, whether your trauma happened during the holidays or you’re simply facing your first (or fifth) holiday season that looks nothing like you imagined.

Inside this episode, Kayleigh explores:

🎄 Why the holidays can feel surprisingly hard, even when your trauma didn’t occur during this season
💔 The painful “expectation vs. reality” gap of first holidays after birth trauma
🗓️ How trauma anniversaries collide with holiday markers, memories, and traditions
✨ Coping strategies to help you make space for grief while still accessing moments of joy
👨‍👩‍👧 Navigating family gatherings, unsolicited comments, and invalidation
🛑 Setting boundaries and preparing scripts for challenging conversations
🤝 How partners, friends, and birth trauma buddies can support you through triggering moments
🌱 Creating new traditions when you’re ready, without erasing the past

Whether you’re stepping into the holiday season for the first time after trauma or have carried these heavy feelings for years, this episode offers grounded tools, compassionate validation, and the reminder that you’re not doing anything wrong and you’re not alone.

Resources & Links

💜 Connect with Kayleigh: @thebirthtrauma_mama
🌐 Learn more at HoldingHopePerinatal.com

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh sits down with Rachel, a mom of two, to share her powerful and deeply layered story of navigating two very different pregnancies and births, both marked by moments of dismissal, fear, and intense advocacy.

Rachel’s first pregnancy shifted dramatically at 30 weeks when she developed severe high blood pressure and preeclampsia, leading to weeks of confusion, mixed messages, and ultimately an induction at 34 weeks. 

Her experience left deep emotional imprints, including guilt, hypervigilance, and the grief of feeling disconnected from her own birth and early postpartum moments.

Years later, Rachel and her wife decided to grow their family again,  a choice shaped by both longing and the fear of repeating past trauma. Her second pregnancy was medically smoother, but her birth once again challenged her sense of safety and autonomy through unheard concerns, rapid labor, and providers who dismissed her awareness of her own body.

Together, Kayleigh and Rachel explore:

💔 The trauma of being dismissed by providers during medical emergencies
🩺 The danger of consent violations and rough, unexplained cervical exams
👶 The emotional complexity of having a baby in the NICU,  and not “feeling it” right away
🧠 Why even the fiercest self-advocates can’t always advocate in crisis
🤍 Making decisions about growing your family after a traumatic birth
🌱 What Rachel learned about agency, preparation, and choosing supportive partners in care

Rachel’s story is a window into how medical trauma can unfold quickly, quietly, and in ways that shape a person’s relationship with birth, their body, and their future. Her reflections offer validation, wisdom, and a reminder that no one should have to fight this hard to be heard.

Resources & Links

💜 Connect with Kayleigh: @thebirthtrauma_mama

🌐 Learn more at: HoldingHopePerinatal.com

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this powerful conversation, Kayleigh sits down with Dr. Cheryl Tatano Beck, one of the most influential researchers in postpartum mood disorders and psychological birth trauma. Dr. Beck shares how her clinical work as a nurse and nurse-midwife led her into research, how she “fell into” traumatic birth as a focus, and why listening to mothers’ own words and metaphors changed everything.

Together, they explore breastfeeding after birth trauma, the role of dignity and respect in preventing trauma, and the possibility of post-traumatic growth—not as a silver lining, but as a real, complex outcome of surviving something life-shattering.

This episode is for survivors, clinicians, nurses, midwives, OBs, lactation consultants, and therapists who want to better understand the lived experience of birth trauma and the research that gave it language.

Together, Kayleigh and Dr. Beck explore:

 ✨ How she found her way into researching postpartum depression and traumatic birth
 ✨ Why qualitative research (and metaphors!) can crack open truth in a way numbers never could
 ✨ The powerful two-path framework for breastfeeding after trauma
 ✨ What surprised her most after decades of listening to survivors
 ✨ Post-traumatic growth and the ways some parents rebuild after everything collapses
 ✨ How clinicians can prevent trauma by protecting dignity, autonomy, and humanity

Resources & Links

💜 Connect with Kayleigh: @thebirthtrauma_mama

🌐 Learn more at HoldingHopePerinatal.com

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this special listener series episode of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh sits down with Lillian, a licensed clinical social worker to unpack both the personal and professional realities of NICU trauma, for parents, families, and the clinicians who support them.

As a psychotherapist specializing in perinatal mental health, Lillian has spent years supporting women through infertility, postpartum mood disorders, and the transition to motherhood. But her work took on new meaning after her own experience as a NICU parent, giving birth to triplets at 34 weeks during the height of COVID-19 and being separated from her babies for ten long days after delivery.

Through vulnerability and clinical wisdom, Lillian shares what it’s really like to be a “visitor” in your own child’s life, the deep shame that can come from not feeling instantly bonded, and the importance of validation and compassion in healing from perinatal trauma.

Together, Kayleigh and Lillian explore:

👶 The unique layers of trauma in NICU experiences, even when you “expect” them
💔 The shame and guilt parents feel when bonding doesn’t happen right away
🧠 Why NICU parents often delay treatment and what healing can look like months later
💬 The power of validation, psychoeducation, and space before trauma reprocessing
🪞 How lived experience can strengthen, but not define, a therapist’s work
🌱 The reminder that you can hold both gratitude and grief in your NICU story

Lillian’s story is a powerful reminder that even when your baby is “okay,” you still deserve care, space, and healing. Her clinical perspective brings hope and understanding to every parent who’s ever walked out of a NICU feeling both grateful and broken and to every provider working to support them better.

Resources & Links

💜 Connect with Lillian: nyctherapygroup.com
| @nyctherapygroup

💬 Connect with Kayleigh: @thebirthtrauma_mama

🌐 Learn more at HoldingHopePerinatal.com

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.