In this moving listener story, Carmen shares her complicated journey through pregnancy loss, recurrent miscarriage, TFMR (termination for medical reasons), traumatic births, emergency deliveries, and ultimately building the family she always dreamed of. As a mother of 12 babies, five Earthside and seven who are no longer physically here, Carmen offers a powerful perspective on grief, resilience, and what it means to continue mothering children who have died.

Throughout this conversation, Carmen opens up about the realities of pregnancy after loss, the emotional toll of carrying grief through multiple pregnancies, and the complicated intersection of gratitude and trauma. Her story is one of profound love, heartbreaking decisions, and the ongoing process of learning how to carry both joy and sorrow at the same time.

In This Episode, We Discuss:

👶 Carmen's first pregnancy and the devastating experience of a missed miscarriage

💔 How pregnancy loss shattered her sense of safety and changed the way she viewed future pregnancies

🩺 Navigating recurrent pregnancy loss and seeking answers through fertility care

❤️ Receiving a devastating prenatal diagnosis during a long-awaited pregnancy

🧬 Learning that her daughter had multiple complex medical conditions, including severe congenital heart defects and DeGeorge syndrome

🤍 Making the heartbreaking decision to pursue TFMR after extensive research and consultation with specialists

👼 Meeting and saying goodbye to her daughter, Ayabelle

📸 Why sharing photos and stories of babies who have died can be an important part of parenting after loss

🌈 The complicated emotions that accompany pregnancy after loss

👶 Welcoming her first living child while carrying immense fear and unresolved grief

🚑 Experiencing multiple emergency deliveries and traumatic birth experiences

🩸 Surviving placental abruptions that threatened both her life and her babies' lives

🏥 The reality of repeatedly entering pregnancy and birth expecting the worst-case scenario

💙 Losing another son, Jude, after receiving a prenatal diagnosis incompatible with life

🌧️ How grief can resurface even years after a loss

🧠 Recognizing delayed trauma and grief long after surviving difficult pregnancies and births

👩‍⚕️ The importance of providers asking not only how patients are doing physically, but emotionally

🌟 The healing power of sharing stories and connecting with other loss parents

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 Raising living children while honoring the siblings who are no longer here

🎗️ Creating community through pregnancy and infant loss advocacy work

✨ Learning how grief evolves rather than disappears

❤️ Holding gratitude and heartbreak at the same time

Key Takeaway

Carmen's story is a powerful reminder that trauma and grief are often rooted in love. Her journey demonstrates that it is possible to build a beautiful life while still carrying profound loss, and that healing doesn't mean leaving grief behind. Whether you're navigating pregnancy loss, TFMR, birth trauma, or parenting after loss, Carmen's story offers validation, hope, and the reminder that every baby matters and every story deserves to be remembered.

Topics Covered

🔹 Pregnancy Loss

🔹 Recurrent Miscarriage

🔹 Missed Miscarriage

🔹 TFMR (Termination for Medical Reasons)

🔹 Pregnancy After Loss

🔹 Birth Trauma

🔹 Placental Abruption

🔹 Emergency C-Sections

🔹 Infant Loss

🔹 Maternal Mental Health

🔹 Grief & Healing

🔹 Parenting After Loss

🔹 Pregnancy & Infant Loss Advocacy

Memorable Quote

✨ "Trauma isn't nothing, it's love that was shocked."

You can follow along with Carmen and her family's journey on Instagram: @adiarytoourbabies and check out their book HERE.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

We often use the terms birth trauma, perinatal trauma, and PTSD interchangeably, but they're not actually the same thing.

In this episode closing out PTSD Awareness Month, Kayleigh breaks down the important differences between:

• Birth and perinatal trauma as an experience
• Post-traumatic stress symptoms (PTSS) that may not meet diagnostic criteria
• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) as a clinical diagnosis

Understanding these distinctions matters, not because one experience is "worse" than another, but because too many parents are left believing they aren't struggling "enough" to deserve support.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why birth trauma is not the same as a PTSD diagnosis
• The DSM-5 criteria for PTSD and how they apply to childbirth
• Why many parents experience significant trauma symptoms without meeting full diagnostic criteria
• The prevalence of birth trauma, PTSS, and PTSD after childbirth
• Why current postpartum screening often misses trauma entirely
• How hypervigilance, intrusive memories, avoidance, nightmares, and nervous system changes can show up after birth
• Why relational trauma and interactions with healthcare providers can profoundly shape whether a birth becomes traumatic
• Why every parent experiencing trauma symptoms deserves care—regardless of diagnosis

Whether you identify with birth trauma, postpartum PTSD, or simply know something changed after your birth experience, this episode is a reminder that your pain doesn't have to fit neatly into a diagnostic box to be real.

Resources Mentioned

• Diagnostic criteria for PTSD (DSM-5)
• Research on childbirth-related PTSD prevalence
• Research on severe maternal morbidity, provider communication, and birth trauma
• CDC report on mistreatment during maternity care

Connect with Kayleigh

If this episode resonated with you, share it with another parent who may need to hear that healing isn't reserved only for those with a diagnosis.

Follow along for more education and support around birth trauma, postpartum PTSD, and nervous system healing.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

Kayleigh sits down with her former therapist, Hilary Waller, to reflect on the years they spent working together after Kayleigh's amniotic fluid embolism (AFE), birth trauma, and the life-altering experiences that followed. Together, they explore the therapeutic relationship, what healing actually looks like over time, and how trauma recovery often evolves from surviving to grieving to fully living again.

This conversation offers a rare behind-the-scenes look at therapy from both the client and therapist perspective. Hilary shares insights into trauma recovery, attachment, grief, identity, and the ways healing can continue long after the most acute pain has passed. It's an honest, thoughtful discussion about what it means to rebuild a life after trauma, and how relationships can become a powerful part of that process.

In This Episode, We Discuss:

🧠 Why Kayleigh invited her former therapist onto the podcast

🤝 The unique and often misunderstood nature of the therapeutic relationship

💙 How therapists carry memories of clients long after treatment ends

🌪️ Processing life after an amniotic fluid embolism (AFE) and severe birth trauma

🪞 Looking back on years of trauma recovery from both the therapist and client perspective

😢 The difference between trauma work and grief work

🌱 Moving from being defined by trauma to integrating it into your story

✨ The shift from surviving an experience to building a meaningful life afterward

👶 Exploring Kayleigh's fears and reflections about how trauma may have impacted her son

❤️ The healing power of finding adaptive and compassionate perspectives on difficult experiences

👨‍👩‍👦 The special role family members can play during and after traumatic events

🔍 Why trauma survivors often search for connection with the people who cared for them during a crisis

🏥 The complex emotions that can emerge when relationships with healthcare providers suddenly end

💭 Attachment, loss, and making meaning after life-threatening medical experiences

🌈 The process of integrating seemingly conflicting emotions like gratitude, grief, joy, and loss

🫶 What makes a therapeutic relationship feel safe, healing, and transformative

📈 Watching healing unfold over years rather than weeks or months

🎙️ How Birth Trauma Mama grew alongside Kayleigh's own healing journey

💡 What therapists wish more people understood about trauma recovery

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this listener story, Jess shares her experience with preeclampsia that went from seemingly mild and manageable to severe in a matter of days. As a first-time mom with an otherwise uncomplicated pregnancy, she found herself blindsided by a diagnosis she knew very little about and quickly facing decisions she never imagined having to make.

Jess opens up about the fear, confusion, and lack of education she encountered throughout her pregnancy, the emotional toll of a prolonged hospital stay, and the premature birth of her daughter at just 31 weeks. She also shares the guilt, grief, and healing that followed, along with the resources and support that helped her process her birth trauma and NICU journey.

Jess's story is a powerful reminder that preeclampsia can happen to anyone and that education matters. Her experience highlights the importance of listening to your body, advocating for answers, and ensuring patients receive clear information about potential pregnancy complications. Most importantly, her story reminds parents that preeclampsia is not their fault, their bodies did not fail them, and healing is possible even after a traumatic pregnancy, birth, and NICU experience.

In This Episode, We Discuss:

👣 The first symptoms that something might be wrong, including sudden swelling and elevated blood pressure

🧪 Protein in the urine, 24-hour urine collections, and the early signs of preeclampsia

😔 Feeling blindsided by a diagnosis she knew very little about

📈 How quickly preeclampsia can progress from mild to severe

🚑 Being unexpectedly transferred by ambulance to a higher-level hospital at just 30 weeks pregnant

⏳ Living in the uncertainty of daily "watch and wait" decisions

👶 Learning what premature birth and NICU life might actually look like

❤️ The impact of compassionate providers who took the time to explain what was happening

😢 Watching other families leave the hospital with their babies while waiting for her own outcome

🌟 Making the difficult decision to move forward with induction at 31 weeks

👩‍🍼 Delivering her daughter vaginally after a rapid induction

🤍 Feeling emotionally numb after birth and why that response is so common after trauma

🏥 Beginning a lengthy NICU journey while simultaneously recovering from a complicated pregnancy

💔 The guilt many parents feel when their babies arrive prematurely

🧠 Healing through therapy, education, and connecting with other birth trauma survivors

👥 Finding support through community and realizing she was not alone in her experience

✨ How a post-trauma consultation with a maternal-fetal medicine specialist became one of the most healing parts of her journey

Resources Mentioned

🔹 The Preeclampsia Foundation

🔹 Dear NICU Mama

🔹 March of Dimes

🔹 Birth Trauma Mama Support Groups

🔹 Therapy & Mental Health Support

🔹 Maternal-Fetal Medicine (MFM) Preconception Counseling

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

This week’s episode is a little different than our usual conversations about birth trauma, healing, and maternal mental health.

Kayleigh is taking listeners behind the scenes of her family's recent trip to Disney World and Universal Orlando, a trip she never expected would become one of their favorite family experiences. As a self-proclaimed non-theme-park expert, Kayleigh shares the planning strategies, lessons learned, and practical tips that helped make the trip successful for their family.

Whether you're considering a Disney or Universal vacation, feeling overwhelmed by the planning process, or simply curious about how the trip went, this episode offers an honest look at navigating theme parks with a deeply feeling kiddo while managing parental expectations, anxiety, and sensory overwhelm.

Key Takeaway

This episode is a reminder that parenting after trauma can still include joy, adventure, and unexpected moments of delight. While birth trauma may always be part of our stories, it doesn't have to define every chapter. Sometimes healing looks like watching your child experience something magical, realizing how far you've come, and creating new memories together.

Tips Shared in This Episode

🔹 Universal Express Passes

🔹 Disney Lightning Lanes

🔹 Standby Skipper App

🔹 Midday Pool Breaks

🔹 Sit-Down Lunch Reservations

🔹 Cooling Towels & Portable Fans

🔹 Lollipops for Long Lines

🔹 Choosing Parks Based on Your Child's Interests

🔹 Keeping Expectations Flexible

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this heartfelt episode, Kirsten shares the story of her unexpected twin pregnancy, a sudden placental abruption at just 27 weeks, and the terrifying emergency C-section that changed everything in a matter of minutes. Far from home and under general anesthesia, Kirsten woke up to a reality she never imagined: two extremely premature babies fighting for their lives in the NICU.

Kirsten opens up about the grief, fear, and disconnection she experienced during those early days, as well as the challenges of navigating a lengthy NICU stay. She also shares how family support, community, faith, and time helped her process the trauma and begin healing. This episode is a powerful reminder that grief and gratitude can exist side by side, and that healing doesn't require forgetting what happened.

In This Episode, We Discuss:

👶 Finding out she was unexpectedly pregnant with twins shortly after getting married

🩺 A healthy twin pregnancy that suddenly changed at 27 weeks due to a placental abruption

🚑 Being rushed to the hospital while visiting family out of state

🩸 Experiencing severe blood loss and an emergency C-section under general anesthesia

💔 Waking up after birth without knowing what had happened or whether her babies were alive

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦 The emotional experience of becoming parents in the midst of a medical crisis

🏥 Meeting her premature twins for the first time in the NICU

😭 Feeling disconnected, fearful, and overwhelmed during the early days of motherhood

🤍 Why struggling to bond immediately with your baby does not mean you love them any less

🫶 The challenges of navigating life with two babies born at just 27 weeks gestation

👩‍⚕️ The incredible impact of compassionate NICU nurses, volunteers, and medical staff

🎄 Spending the holiday season in the NICU while feeling like the outside world kept moving on

🌟 The importance of family support during a prolonged hospitalization

🏡 Bringing her twins home healthy just one day before their due date

😔 The unexpected emotional challenges that surfaced after NICU discharge

💭 Processing grief, trauma, and the reality that healing doesn't happen the moment you leave the hospital

✨ Learning that grief and gratitude can coexist

💪 Finding confidence in her own strength and resilience as a mother

❤️ How faith, time, and community helped her move toward healing

Key Takeaway

Kirsten's story highlights the reality that surviving a traumatic birth and NICU experience is only part of the journey. Healing often continues long after discharge, and it's okay to hold both gratitude for positive outcomes and grief for what was lost. Her story offers hope to parents navigating trauma, reminding them that they are not alone and that healing can happen one step at a time.

Topics Covered

🔹 Twin Pregnancy

🔹 Placental Abruption

🔹 Emergency C-Section

🔹 Premature Birth

🔹 NICU Journey

🔹 Birth Trauma

🔹 Maternal Mental Health

🔹 Parent-Infant Bonding

🔹 NICU Discharge

🔹 Healing After Trauma

You can follow and connect with Kirsten on Instagram: @kirstenzhuravlev

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

In this powerful listener story, Kate returns to share her second birth experience after previously sharing her first story years ago. After surviving postpartum preeclampsia and medical trauma with her first child, Kate spent years healing through therapy, EMDR, community support, and advocacy work. When she became pregnant again, she hoped for a different experience, but life had other plans.

At 24 weeks pregnant, Kate learned that her son had a rare congenital heart condition. What followed was months of uncertainty, specialist appointments, a surprise early delivery, NICU and cardiac ICU stays, and ultimately open-heart surgery when her son was just five weeks old. Through it all, Kate shares how community, mental health support, and unwavering advocacy helped her navigate some of the most difficult moments of her life.

In This Episode, We Discuss:

🩺 Kate’s experience with preeclampsia and postpartum preeclampsia after her first birth

💔 Developing PTSD following a traumatic postpartum hospital readmission

🧠 How EMDR therapy helped her process medical trauma and begin healing

🤝 Finding support through the Preeclampsia Foundation, Mama’s Voices, and the birth trauma community

👶 The emotional challenges of trying to conceive after a traumatic birth experience

🔬 Receiving a prenatal diagnosis of a rare congenital heart condition during her second pregnancy

🏥 Navigating fetal echocardiograms, specialist appointments, and uncertainty throughout pregnancy

❤️ Understanding her son’s diagnosis of Shone’s Complex and the impact on his developing heart

📋 Transferring medical care and advocating for both her baby’s needs and her own mental health

🌪️ Going into labor unexpectedly just 48 hours before her scheduled C-section

👩‍⚕️ Delivering a medically complex baby and coping with immediate separation after birth

🏨 The realities of NICU and Cardiac ICU life as a heart parent

🚗 The emotional experience of leaving the hospital without her baby

💉 Watching her son undergo open-heart surgery at only five weeks old

🌟 The incredible advances in pediatric cardiac care and modern medicine

💙 How chosen family, therapists, healthcare providers, and community support carried her through

🎙️ Becoming a patient-family partner and using her story to advocate for better care and awareness

Take a look at Kate's writing for a professional organization: Read here

Baby Boy Principe's Caring Bridge - read "in real time" how Kate processed their experience.

Resources Mentioned

🔹 The Preeclampsia Foundation @preeclampsia.foundation

🔹 Mama’s Voices @mommasvoices

🔹 Mended Little Hearts @mendedlittleheartsnational

🔹 Conquering CHD @conqueringCHD

🔹 CHD Doodles @chd_doodles

Connect With Birth Trauma Mama

✨ Follow along for more birth stories, healing resources, and support for parents navigating birth trauma and perinatal mental health challenges.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

This week, we are rereleasing a powerful episode with our guest Jess Myhre to talk about the choice (or sometimes not) to be one and done, particularly after birth trauma. Jess has been a pioneer in the discussion and support of families with only children, regardless of the reason. She fiercely advocates and validates for these families in her beautiful space @onlyyoucommunity.

On this episode, Jess shares her story of birth trauma along with hope and encouragement for those who are one and done through choice, trauma, or for any reason at all.

You can learn more about the Birth Trauma & Secondary Infertility Webinar here.

Guest Bio: 

Hi I’m Jess! I am a preeclampsia survivor, mom of an only child, and advocate for parents of one, by choice or by circumstance. I am also the creator of Only You: A One and Done Podcast, a show for parents of only children.

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

This week on the Birth Trauma Mama Podcast listener series, Kayleigh is joined by Kayelynn to share her powerful story of preeclampsia, birth trauma, repeat C-sections, and the complicated journey of pregnancy after trauma. In honor of Preeclampsia Awareness Month, this episode highlights the reality of living through severe preeclampsia, navigating emergency medical decisions, and coping with the emotional aftermath that can linger long after birth.

Kayelynn vulnerably shares her experiences across three pregnancies and births, from a traumatic induction and emergency C-section at 35 weeks to pursuing a VBAC after trauma to ultimately finding empowerment in choice, healing, and reclaiming trust in herself. This conversation is an honest reminder that healing is not always linear, and that “redemption” after birth trauma can look very different from what we imagine.

✨ In this episode, we discuss:

💜 May as Preeclampsia Awareness Month and why awareness matters

🩺 The warning signs and progression of severe preeclampsia

🏥 A traumatic induction, magnesium treatment, and emergency C-section at 35 weeks

💔 Experiencing pain during a C-section and the lasting emotional impact

👶 Parenting a newborn while simultaneously trying to process trauma

🫂 Feeling misunderstood by family and support systems after a traumatic birth

🌈 The hope — and pressure — that can come with trying for a “redemptive” birth

⚡ Navigating a VBAC attempt after birth trauma and coping when plans change

🧠 How therapy, support, and self-awareness helped Kaitlin begin healing

✨ Finding empowerment and choice, even within another difficult birth experience

🤍 The reality that healing after birth trauma is not always perfect or linear

🌱 Learning that joy and grief can exist together after traumatic birth experiences

You can follow along or connect with Kayelynn on Instagram: @kayelynn_schmid

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.

This episode explores the profound identity shift that can happen after birth trauma, the grief of losing who you were before, the disorientation of feeling disconnected from yourself, and the complicated process of rebuilding after trauma. Kayleigh shares how trauma can reshape personality, relationships, interests, and even the way we experience parenthood itself.

Through personal stories and reflections from the birth trauma community, this conversation offers validation, hope, and reassurance that healing does not mean becoming who you were before, it means learning to reconnect with yourself in a new way. If you’ve ever felt like birth trauma changed you forever, this episode reminds you that while trauma leaves its mark, healing can bring pieces of yourself back to life again.

In this episode, we discuss:

🫶 The grief and identity loss that can follow birth trauma

🧠 How trauma changes personality, emotions, and daily life

👶 Why parenthood after trauma can feel isolating and confusing

💔 The loss of innocence around pregnancy, birth, and postpartum

🎭 Feeling disconnected from other parents and motherhood spaces

📺 Unexpected changes in hobbies, media tolerance, and interests after trauma

🌱 How healing allows parts of yourself to slowly return

🤍 Making peace with the version of yourself that existed before trauma

🌟 Finding hope, connection, and joy again after birth trauma

🫂 A reminder that healing is possible — even when it feels far away

For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.

Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.

Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.