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If you’re a parent or a teacher, you’ve probably wondered about what the best conditions are for psychological development in children, and where we might have gone so wrong as a society. This week, we talk with psychologist Peter Gray about the developmental needs of children, and why long school days, risk free environments, and too much supervision are wreaking havoc with their psychological development.

Other episodes on parenting/teaching:

Michaeleen Doucleff on the universals of childhood - https://examined-life.com/interviews/michaeleen-doucleffe/

Links:

Peter Gray's Substack - https://petergray.substack.com/

Peter Gray's TED talk on play - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bg-GEzM7iTk

Kenny's Substack - https://substack.com/@kennyprimrose?utm_source=user-menu

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Michael Sacasas writes about technology and human flourishing through his wildly popular newsletter The Convivial Society. I have been reading his work for a number of years and find it both winsome and wise. It was delight to have the opportunity to speak to him about a question he thinks we should be asking ourselves.

In this conversation we explore the question of what humans should still do for themselves even when technology can do it better or more efficiently. This conversation challenges our assumptions about technological progress and asks us to consider what makes for a truly good human life.

• Technology often promises efficiency but requires us to question what we might be losing in the process
• Albert Borgman's concept of "focal things" versus "devices" helps us understand what's lost when we automate tasks
• Central heating removed family participation and togetherness that came with maintaining a hearth
• Writing by hand or thinking through drafts teaches us what we think in ways AI writing can't replace
• Even mundane tasks like washing dishes can provide valuable moments for reflection and conversation
• The Amish demonstrate thoughtful technology adoption by evaluating each innovation against community values
• Getting outdoors, learning names of plants and animals, and cooking together builds connection with the world
• Leading with positive practices rather than just limiting technology helps children understand family values
• Face-to-face encounters and "weak ties" with neighbors become increasingly important in our mediated world

If you've found this episode valuable, please subscribe to the podcast and newsletter,  to stay up to date with forthcoming episodes, and read regular reflections on these interviews.

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What if the Western approach to parenting is based on spurious cultural assumptions, not human nature? In this episode, science writer Michaeleen Doucleff takes us inside indigenous communities around the world to reveal what Western parenting gets backwards, as we explore her question - what are the universals of childhood? From the origins of modern parenting in orphanage manuals to the power of kids contributing to real family life, we explore what children actually need to thrive — and how small shifts can create big changes in connection, confidence, and calm at home.

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In this summary episode, we take the theme of attention which runs through most of conversations in the second season. In the episode you'll hear fragments of conversation from Iain McGilchrist, Dacher Keltner, Dougald Hine, Phoebe Tickell, Alex Evans, Elizabeth Oldfield, Jill Bolte-Taylor, Eve Poole and Todd Kashdan. Over this short episode, you'll hear discussion of a wide range of topics, from religion,  AI and smartphones, to the role of awe and imagination.

Click here to access any of the podcast episodes in full - https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-examined-life/id1680728280

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This is a distilled version of last year's conversation with the writer Oliver Burkeman. In it, you'll hear Oliver talk about our troubled relationship with time and how to more fully inhabit it.

Oliver believes our obsession with productivity and efficiency is no route to happiness, quite the opposite. In order to inhabit time more fully, we need to embrace our limitations. This will mean admitting that however many worthwhile ways there are to spend our time, we can't do them all. This is a liberating fact, and can help us enjoy those things we have committed to all the more.

Oliver's new book Meditations for Mortals is now available to buy, and focuses on helpful ways to resist the culture of efficiency, and embrace our finitude more fully.

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Phoebe Tickell is a biologist, systems thinker, and 'imagination activist'. Phoebe works across multiple contexts applying a complexity and systems thinking lens and engaging people in how to think differently about the planet and its problems. In 2020 Phoebe created 'Moral Imaginations', which researches and implements collective imagination exercises and training to inspire change and find new solutions in an era of unprecedented disruption and potential for transformation.

In this episode we explore the ways in which western culture has shaped the way we think and approach the problems of our day. Phoebe suggests that taking a step back and questioning received wisdom might provide more promising solutions to the crises we are currently facing.

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What do we lack when we lack religion? In this episode Alex Evans explores the role that religion has historically played in both collective and individual life, and the shape it leaves behind when it disappears. The stories that we locate ourselves within and the rituals they enshrine, are formative in the way we attend to the world. Religion has historically provided the structure for this work, and its absence leaves a vacuum. The conversation explores the various pretenders to the religious throne, any why many of them fall short. 

Alex works at the intersection of where the state of our minds meets the state of the world, and the way these influence one another. His organisation Larger Us is seeks to drive positive change address the crises of our day by bringing people together, you can find out more on their website - www.larger.us.

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Dr Jill Bolte-Taylor was a neuroanatomist at Harvard when she suffered a severe stroke on the left hemisphere of her brain. It was an experience which profoundly changed her life, and opened her up to the agency we all have in choosing our attention. She explores this in her TED talk back in 2008, which became one of the most popular TED talks ever. In this conversation we explore Jill's question 'who are we, and what are we doing here?', doing so through the lens of neuroanatomy, as well as her experience of having a stroke. Many of the ideas we explore are unpacked further in her book Whole Brain Living.

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Show links:
Todd's website - https://toddkashdan.com/
Todd's Substack - https://toddkashdan.substack.com/
Kenny's Substack - https://positivelymaladjusted.substack.com/
Examined Life youtube channel - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpKC6L_IJ2zvL6E6M8Ly1AA

What if the most influential voices in our society are those often left unheard? In this episode, I sit down with Todd Kashdan, a psychology professor at George Mason University and the mind behind "The Art of Insubordination," to unravel the complexities of influence and dissent. We begin by discussing how individuals with little power, status, or majority support can still make a significant impact. Todd and I explore the significance of offering constructive ideas, no matter how imperfect, and the necessity of ensuring diverse participation in discussions to amplify marginalised voices.

Next, we shine a spotlight on the indispensable role of principled dissenters in driving societal progress. Through the inspiring stories of Richard Feynman and Nelson Mandela, we highlight how challenging groupthink is not just courageous but essential for improvement. We dissect whether individualistic or collectivist societies are more conducive to nurturing such brave voices, drawing lessons from Mandela's resilience and leadership within a collectivist context. This chapter delves deep into the sacrifices and personal risks associated with being a change-maker, offering listeners tangible examples of how dissent can lead to monumental shifts.

Finally, we navigate the virtues essential for fostering a culture of curiosity and intellectual humility. We discuss the trade-offs one needs to make for a meaningful life, and the importance of creativity, experimentation, and living authentically. We discuss how education systems can nurture or stifle the principled insubordinates of tomorrow and the critical need for inefficiency and curiosity in both educational and professional settings. This episode has practical tips on how you can cultivate the power pave your unique path against societal norms. Special thanks to Todd Kashdan for his invaluable insights.

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Iain McGilchrist is a rare polymath who draws on his background in literature, philosophy, medicine and the sciences to make a profound argument that the kind of attention we pay to the world determines not only the kind of people we become, but also the world we create. He argues that the brains left hemisphere has a disenchanted and mechanical view of the world, and it is this that has come to dominate the Western World. A consequence of this is that we've lost a sense of the sacred, of belonging, and of the reality of the values of truth, beauty and goodness.

In this episode we discuss what it is about life that we might be missing through the way we are paying attention. The conversation is wide ranging, exploring the brain hemispheres,  the reality of values, and indeed the purpose of life in the universe.

Further information on Iain's work can be found on his website.
A full version of this interview  will be available on the Examined Life's youtube channel.

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