While Julia recovers from shoulder surgery, Sophie and Emily step in to respond to a painful and familiar dilemma, wanting another child when your partner doesn’t. They explore the emotional deadlock that can arise when a decision feels completely binary, and how the absence of compromise can intensify grief, fear, and resentment on both sides of a relationship.
Together, they reflect on how meaningful listening, really hearing what having or not having a baby represents to each person, can soften polarisation and protect connection, even when there is no easy answer. They talk about guilt, longing, fear of resentment, and the importance of staying emotionally connected through difference. This episode offers compassionate guidance for navigating unbearable uncertainty, honouring grief, and finding ways to continue, with yourself and with each other, when life doesn’t unfold as hoped.

Julia and Helen Fielding will be recording live at The Tabernacle in Notting Hill on March 3rd at 7pm. If you’d like to be there, tickets are available via this link HERE: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/therapy-works-live-with-helen-fielding-love-loss-and-the-messy-business-tickets-1981420678588?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=cp&aff=ebdsshcopyurl

We hope to see you there!

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In this Agony Aunties episode, Julia, Sophie and Emily respond to a brave listener who admits she loves her two adult daughters deeply but often struggles to like them. With one daughter feeling unmotivated and the other frequently hurtful or unpredictable, she asks how to navigate disappointment, set boundaries, and understand what is reasonable to expect from adult children.
Together, they explore the unspoken guilt many parents feel, the shift from parent–child to adult–adult relationships, and how old hurts layer into current dynamics. They offer gentle guidance on letting go of control, maintaining connection, managing expectations and finding compassion for yourself as well as your children. A validating, honest conversation for anyone facing complicated family relationships.

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In this special Agony Aunties episode, we pause our usual listener questions so Julia can share something personal as she prepares for a reverse shoulder replacement after years of complications from Ramsay Hunt syndrome and a serious injury. With Emily and Sophie beside her, she speaks openly about the dread of facing another major operation, the loss of trust in her body, the somatic shock that surfaced when she made the decision, and the uncomfortable confrontation with ageing, vulnerability, and past medical memories. They explore how coping strategies like denial and busyness can feel protective, how therapy can be both helpful and challenging, and how support from others makes an enormous difference even when some parts of the journey are inevitably solitary. It is an honest, tender conversation about fear, resilience, and the deeply human work of accepting help and allowing the body to heal.

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In this expert episode of the Therapy Works podcast, Julia speaks with psychotherapist Oona Metz, author of Unhitched, about her extensive experience supporting women through divorce. Drawing on over 30 years of clinical practice - including 15 years running divorce support groups - Oona also shares insights from her own personal experience of divorce.
Together, they explore the emotional stages of separation, the impact of divorce on children, and the importance of self-care, community and compassion during the process. While acknowledging how painful divorce can be, Oona emphasises that with the right support it can also become a powerful opportunity for growth, healing and new beginnings.
Buy her book: https://www.oonametz.com/book-unhitched
Resources mentioned:


Baroness Fiona Shackleton’s 10 questions to ask before embarking on a serious relationship: https://news-archive.exeter.ac.uk/featurednews/title_672700_en.html

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In this bonus episode of Therapy Works, I’m joined by Professor Marc Brackett, founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and author of Permission to Feel and Dealing With Feeling. We talk about why so many of us grew up without an emotional ally, how fear stops us asking the people we love how they really feel, and why emotions aren’t something to suppress or fix. They are information we need to listen to.
Marc shares a clear, practical framework for emotional regulation, giving ourselves permission to feel, naming emotions, and calming the nervous system, alongside thoughtful ways to navigate family dynamics and become the support we may not have had growing up. It’s a hopeful, grounding conversation about learning emotional skills at any age, and passing them on.

You can buy Marc’s latest book Dealing With Feeling here: https://amzn.eu/d/80YxubS

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self.

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In this episode, the Agony Aunties respond to a deeply moving question from a widowed father facing his first Christmas after the death of his wife. Six months into grief, he is trying to support three adult children while barely holding himself together, worried he’s failing them and watching one daughter take on too much responsibility as the family adjusts to an unfillable absence. With compassion and clarity, Sophie and Emily explore why trying to replace the person who has died can leave everyone exhausted, how grief reshapes family roles, and why acknowledging the presence of absence can be more healing than trying to make things “normal.” They offer gentle, practical guidance on talking openly about grief, supporting adult children who are grieving in different ways, approaching Christmas with flexibility, creating or changing rituals, and drawing in support rather than doing it all alone 0 reminding us that grief isn’t something to solve, but something to be carried together.

Resources:

Grief Works App: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/grief-works-self-care-love/id1558867513

Cruse: https://www.cruse.org.uk/

Child Bereavement UK: https://www.childbereavementuk.org/

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self.

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In this Agony Aunties episode of Therapy Works, Julia, Emily and Sophie respond to a deeply moving letter from a listener questioning whether her long, emotionally disconnected marriage can be saved. They explore the complex layers of love, duty, financial dependence, neurodivergence, resentment, and midlife awakening - offering thoughtful reflections on grief, desire, the cost of staying, and the cost of leaving. With compassion and clarity, they discuss how therapy, imagining possible futures, practical planning, and understanding neurodivergent dynamics can help illuminate a way forward. They also share book and podcast recommendations, discuss the emotional impact on both partners, and remind listeners that meaningful change - whatever form it takes - doesn’t have to be rushed.

Links & Resources Mentioned

• Email your questions: [email protected]

• DM Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe

• The Honesty Box by Lucy Brazier

• Therapy Works episode with Lucy Brazier

• The Four Minds by Miranda July (book referenced in the discussion) is called All Fours: https://mirandajuly.com/all-fours/

• Esther Perel x Miranda July conversation (podcast interview)

• Unhitched: The Essential Divorce Guide for Women by Oona Metz (guest mentioned as upcoming interview)

If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠⁠

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self.

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Emily Samuel engages in a conversation with Dr. Anna Colton about her book, 'How to Talk to Children About Food'. They address common parental fears and misconceptions regarding children's eating habits and emphasise creating a positive, low-stress relationship with food.

Dr. Colton highlights the importance of neutral and intuitive eating, discusses the role of family dynamics, and gives practical advice for parents, especially those dealing with their own dietary issues or past eating disorders. They also cover strategies for handling food-related stress during holidays and how to provide a balanced, non-punitive approach to child nutrition. Overall, the episode revolves around fostering healthy attitudes towards food without anxiety, aiming for prevention over correction.

Find Anna:

Website: https://www.dranna.co.uk/about

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drannacolton

Book (Amazon): https://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Children-About-Food/dp/1785120557

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In this Agony Aunties episode, Emily, Sophie and Julia respond to a powerful letter from a listener in her fifties who is still grieving the sudden loss of her mother during COVID, while also supporting a teenage daughter who adored her grandmother and coping with a painful fallout with her sister. Together, they explore how trauma can fracture families, why unresolved love has nowhere to go, and how small, gentle rituals can help create meaning when goodbyes were denied. They offer compassionate guidance on rebuilding connection, supporting a grieving teen, and finding personal stability amidst multiple layers of loss - reminding us that healing often begins with tiny steps, openness, and shared humanity.

More from Therapy Works:

Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia’s monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠⁠

Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe⁠⁠⁠ for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life’s challenges.

If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.

If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠⁠

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self.

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In this week’s Agony Aunties episode, Julia, Sophie and Emily answer a painfully relatable listener question about being unable to stop checking an ex’s Instagram — even from a secret second account. They explore why scrolling an ex feels so addictive (spoiler: it’s part heartbreak, part habit, part magical thinking), how it keeps us stuck in the past, and the practical behavioural tools that genuinely help break the cycle. From deleting apps temporarily, to “just for today” thinking, to catching the urge and offering yourself compassion before acting, they unpack why this pattern is so common — and how to gently free yourself from it.

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