If there's one thing we've learned in all our years of discussing bad movies, it's that vanity projects are often the creme de la creme of bizarre and terrible cinema. And hoo doggies, do we have something special for you. Made in 2006, then shelved for nearly a decade before getting quietly dumped to streaming in 2014, writer/director/star Stuart Paul's magnum opus, Deadly Lessons, is a fantasy self-help (?) thriller (?) that's impossible to describe, but lord, do we try.

Movies recommended in this episode:

Charlie's Angels (2019)

Palm Springs

The Navigator: A Medieval Odyssey

The longtime anchor of the NBC Nightly News drops by to break down the new Dune trailer, and how he left his heart on Arrakis.

After a run of guests, we're celebrating Smalltember with just family. Because at a time like this, family is important, y'know? Almost as important as a movie where Kelsey Grammer menacingly smokes a cigar while telling a professional wrestler to rob a sky casino. That's right, we talked about Money Plane. You're welcome.

Wikipedia summary of Money Plane

Movies recommended in this episode:

We Need to Talk About Kevin

Da 5 Bloods

Motherless Brooklyn

Dan asks his co-hosts: do they want to play a game...?

We finally invited the boss over for dinner, so we'd better hide all those staplers we stole! Noted dog lover and the head of Maximum Fun himself, Jesse Thorn, joins us to discuss The Call of the Wild, based on that one book you probably read in middle school.

Wikipedia synopsis of The Call of the Wild

Movies recommended in this episode:

Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga

Host

Ah Wilderness!

A Thousand Clowns

Stuart explains Warhammer to Dan and Elliott, and everything is 100% cleared up forever and ever.

The star of the show is back! We were SO happy to hang with the delightful and hilarious Hallie Haglund once more. And this time we didn't force her to discuss some fantasy bullshit she hates! Instead, we all watched what is surely one of the top three movies based on a Wham! song -- Last Christmas!

Also, if you're listening to this show on the day of release, you can also get another shot of Hallie by tuning into our table read of The Boy Next Door, starring Hallie, Dan, Stu, Elliott, Natalie Walker, Jenny Jaffe, and X Mayo!

Wikipedia synopsis of Last Christmas

Movies recommended in this episode:

Tango & Cash

Runaway Train

The Curse of the Cat People

Swallow

Memories of Murder

What's this? An off-week FULL EPISODE? That's right -- as a li'l thank you for all of the support during the Max Fun Drive, we've reached into the vault and let loose this live episode, taped at Boston's CitySpace, on Alita: Battle Angel, so you can FINALLY learn the origin of Elliott's conviction that Dan loves backstory.

ALSO! Two Flop House livestream events to put on your calendar for next week!

On Thursday, August 13, at 5:30 pm PT / 8:30 pm ET, we'll be joining our Blank Check Podcast pal, Mr. Griffin Newman, to provide LIVE COMMENTARY for XXX: The Return of Xander Cage. Tickets can be acquired HERE!

AND! On Friday, August 15, at 6 pm PT / 9 pm ET, we'll be honoring the promise from our charity livestream and doing a table read of the screenplay for the J-Lo thriller The Boy Next Door, featuring Dan, Stu, and Elliott, along with SPECIAL GUESTS Hallie Haglund, Natalie Walker, Jenny Jaffe, and X Mayo. You can go to the Flop House YouTube page to check it out for free!!!

Wikipedia synopsis of Alita: Battle Angel

Did you think we wouldn't pull out all the stops for Max Fun Drive 2020? More fool you! Because in this episode, we discuss legendary Hollywood flop and Bruce Willis passion project, Hudson Hawk! And to discuss this momentous film, we're joined by Roman Mars, of the blockbuster design podcast 99% Invisible, the man many have called "The Hudson Hawk of Podcasting."* (The character Hudson Hawk. Not the movie Hudson Hawk. Because the character is so good at his job. Like Roman. Who is good at podcasting. Like Hudson Hawk is with stealing stuff.)

*No one calls him this.

Wikipedia synopsis of Hudson Hawk

Movies recommended in this episode:

Relic

Buck and the Preacher

Portrait of a Lady on Fire

Quick Change

In perhaps our silliest episode yet, Elliott and Stuart try and pitch a Flop House movie to Dan, who... we guess owns a studio in this scenario? Whatever. Just listen.