🥚📻 Warning: Retro Breakfast Quiz Show Episode 6 has escaped the bounds of normality and is currently wreaking havoc in YORK! 📻🥚

Yes, York — the city of ancient walls, ghost tours, and now, wildly inappropriate breakfast-themed innuendo — is hosting the latest instalment of this gloriously unhinged quiz show. And if you thought things couldn’t get more chaotic than Baby Luke chewing on a buzzer... you were painfully mistaken.

🎙️ Introducing the cast of culinary clowns:

• Retro Mike Kennedy – His intros are now officially longer than War and Peace, with subplots, flashbacks, and three musical interludes. He starts each episode with a dramatic soliloquy and ends it halfway through the first round of questions.
• Wanted Joe – Still on the run from the Law of Comedy. He brings puns so bad the audience is legally required to groan. He’s also responsible for approximately 73% of the confusion in the studio.
• Jenni Wenni – Our incontinent queen of sarcasm, sass, and surprisingly aggressive knitting. She’s here to win the quiz, drink suspicious tea, and occasionally threaten people with a slipper.

🍼 Special Guests Who May Require Adult Supervision:

• Adrien – He locked himself in a car by accident and now thinks York is the yolk of England. Currently trying to quiz through the window using semaphore and a bag of crisps. His answers may be chaotic, but her dance moves are flawless.
• Little Baby Luke – Fresh from the crèche and ready to party. He’s got one tooth, zero quiz knowledge, and a laugh so infectious it derailed Round Two. His mum said he could stay up late only if he doesn’t lick the buzzers. So far, that promise is hanging by a thread.

💥 Expect:

• Retro Mike narrating the history of York through interpretive jazz hands
• Jenni Wenni accidentally starting a turf war with a local history club
• Adrien mistaking a sundial for a microwave
• Baby Luke buzzing in repeatedly with the word “banana,” regardless of the question

So grab your toast, fasten your seatbelt, and prepare for a full-English trainwreck of comedy, trivia, and absolutely no educational value whatsoever.

🎉🥓 Brace yourselves Cardiff — The Retro Breakfast Quiz Show is BACK for Episode 5 and it’s more Welsh than a choir of sheep harmonising in a thunderstorm! 🐑🎶

That’s right, your favourite breakfast-time bonanza has rolled into the majestic land of dragons, daffodils, and deeply confused contestants. Retro Mike Kennedy has returned to his homeland of Wales — passport stamped, accent thicker than treacle, and armed with trivia so niche even the locals are baffled.

📍 Location Update: Welcome to Cardiff, the city of culture, castles, and questionable karaoke. We’ve parked the quiz-mobile next to a Greggs and already offended three locals by mispronouncing “Llanfairpwllgwyngyll.”

🎙️ This week’s beautiful breakfast buffet of buffoonery features:

• Retro Mike Kennedy – Back on home turf and ready to defend the honour of Welsh toast. He’s wearing a leek hat, humming Tom Jones classics, and calling everyone “boyo” whether it makes sense or not.
• Wanted Joe – Still wanted, still Joe. He’s brought a Welsh-English dictionary that he thinks is a spellbook. Last seen trying to summon trivia answers from a plate of bara brith.
• Jenni Wenni – Your favourite incontinent pensioner. She’s here with her trusty flask of tea, a new walking stick made from a broom handle, and a cardigan that somehow has its own postcode.

🌟 Special Guests Who Definitely Need Supervision:

• Tamika – She still doesn’t know what day it is, where she is, or why Retro Mike keeps feeding her Welsh cakes. She may be spiritually in Cardiff but mentally still in Episode 2.
• Little Baby Luke – The freshest face in quiz history. He’s had special permission from his mum to be out past bedtime, but only if he doesn’t cry when someone says “pass.” He’s wearing dinosaur pyjamas and thinks the buzzers are snack dispensers. He's adorable, chaotic, and may or may not have eaten half the score sheet.

🧠 Team Dynamics: With Tamika in a daze and Baby Luke chewing on a microphone, Jenni Wenni and Wanted Joe have their work cut out for them. Between nappy changes and philosophical tangents about toast, these two veterans must carry the team like a pair of bewildered donkeys dragging a broken caravan uphill.

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🎵 Let’s Brighten the Land of Song: Forget harps and valleys — this is music made from buzzers, laughter, and random screaming. It’s less “Land of Song” and more “Land of Oh-No-What-Now?” But by golly, it’s beautiful.

🥓🎉 Hold onto your beans, Bristol — The Retro Breakfast Quiz Show is BACK for Episode 4! 🎉🥓

That’s right, the nation’s most gloriously unhinged breakfast-time quiz show has crash-landed in the city of bridges, boats, and baffled bystanders. Bristol didn’t ask for this. Bristol wasn’t ready for this. But Bristol’s getting it anyway.

📍 Location Update: We’re in the heart of Bristol, where the locals are friendly, the accents are musical, and the seagulls are aggressive. The Retro Breakfast crew has arrived, and the city’s IQ has dropped by at least 12 points.

🎙️ Your Usual Suspects:

• Retro Mike Kennedy – The host with the most… questionable facts. He’s still wearing his 1987 windbreaker, still quoting cereal commercials, and still convinced he’s Britain’s answer to Alex Trebek (he’s not).
• Wanted Joe – Still wanted. Still Joe. Still confused about whether this is a podcast, a quiz show, or a hostage situation. He’s brought snacks, but they’re all stolen.
• Jenni Wenni – Our incontinent queen of chaos. She’s older than the concept of time and sassier than a goose in stilettos. She’s here to win, knit, and possibly nap mid-round.

🎉 Special Guests Who May or May Not Know What’s Going On:

• Tamika – She’s back, and she still doesn’t know what day it is, where she is, or why she’s holding a microphone. Last seen trying to interview a traffic cone. She’s got enthusiasm, confusion.
• Adrien the Foreign Correspondent – He’s vaguely aware he’s on a podcast. He thinks “quiz” is a type of cheese. He’s fluent in five languages, none of which are helpful in this context. He’s here to represent international confusion.

🧠 Team Breakdown: With Tamika and Adrien on the teams, Jenni Wenni and Wanted Joe have their work cut out for them. There’s explaining to do. There’s translating to do. There’s a very real chance someone will try to answer a trivia question with interpretive dance.

🎮 Let the Explaining and Carnage Commence!

Expect:

• Games that make no sense, even with subtitles.
• Jokes so bad they’ve been banned in three countries.
• Tamika mistaking a buzzer for a sandwich.
• Adrien attempting to answer every question with “yes” and a shrug.
• Retro Mike losing control of the show by minute seven and resorting to shouting random facts about Weetabix.

So grab your cuppa, brace yourself for chaos, and remember: This isn’t just a quiz show — it’s a full-blown breakfast-time fever dream with a side of existential dread.

🥓🎉 The Retro Breakfast Quiz Show is BACK for Episode 3 — and this time, we’ve invaded Leeds! 🎉🥓

Yes, you heard right. The city of Leeds has bravely opened its arms (and possibly its emergency exits) to welcome the most unhinged breakfast-based quiz show in existence. If you thought things got weird in Episode 2, buckle up — this one’s got more twists than a curly fry in a tornado.

📍 Location Update: We’re in Leeds, the land of flat caps, fierce pride, and people who say “ey up” instead of hello. The locals are confused, the pigeons are terrified, and the city council has already filed a noise complaint.

🎙️ Meet the Madness-Makers:

• Retro Mike Kennedy – Still rocking the same questionable haircut and even more questionable trivia. He’s the only man who can turn a question about 1980s cereal into a full-blown existential crisis.
• Wanted Joe – He’s wanted in three counties for crimes against comedy, but we keep inviting him back because he brings snacks. Mostly expired ones.
• Jenni Wenni – Our incontinent icon. She’s older, bolder, and now legally banned from using glitter. She’s brought her knitting, her sass, and a flask of something suspicious.
• Special Appearance: The Mysterious Simon – Once a regular guest, now a missing person. After telling a joke so bad it caused a blackout in Huddersfield, Simon vanished into the shadows. We don’t know where he is, but we do know he left behind a half-eaten crumpet and a note that just said “I’m sorry.”
• Introducing Tamika – She’s a sandwich short of a picnic, a crayon short of a box, and a few marbles short of a functioning board game. But she’s got enthusiasm, glittery boots, and a laugh that sounds like a goose being tickled.

🎮 What’s on the menu this episode? More silly games. More stupid humour. More Retro Breakfast Quiz Show madness than your nan’s bingo night after three sherries.

Expect:

• Trivia so niche it makes stamp collecting look edgy
• Jokes so bad they’ve been classified as emotional terrorism
• Games so absurd they make “Pin the Tail on the Donkey” look like a Mensa test

So grab your cuppa, brace yourself for chaos.

🎉🥓 Hold onto your toast, folks — The Retro Breakfast Quiz Show is back for Episode 2! 🥓🎉

This time, we’re heading north — and not just metaphorically. We’re talking actual compass-point chaos. So grab your thermals, brace yourself for questionable accents, and prepare for a journey where the only thing colder than the weather is the punchlines.

🚨 WARNING: Side effects may include uncontrollable giggling, mild confusion, and an irrational craving for beans on toast.

🎙️ Starring your beloved breakfast-time misfits:

• Retro Mike Kennedy – The man, the myth, the pun king. He’s got dad jokes in his veins and a suspiciously large collection of innuendos.
• Wanted Joe – Still technically on the run from last episodes scandal. But we’ve got him locked down for this episode… unless he escapes mid-round again.
• Jenni Wenni – Everybody’s favourite incontinent old lady. She’s back, she’s leaking opinions, and she’s armed with a handbag full of Werther’s Originals and unsolicited advice.
• Special Guest: Manny the Monk – He’s taken a vow of silence, but don’t worry — he breaks it every five minutes to shout answers and complain about the lack of oat milk.

🎮 Expect games so silly they make charades look like chess. You’ll be laughing, cringing, and wondering how this show hasn’t been banned yet.

🃏 The jokes? Oh, they’re coming in hot and awkward. Think dad jokes, nan jokes, and at least one pun so bad it might cause temporary facial paralysis.

So tune in, buckle up, and remember: it’s not just breakfast — it’s a full English of nonsense.

🎉 The Retro Breakfast Quiz Show is back — and this time, they’re storming into Birmingham like a glittery tornado of nostalgia, nonsense, and… sausages. Yes, actual sausages. Don’t ask why. Just accept it.

🍳 Join the delightfully unhinged trio:

• Retro Mike Kennedy, who still thinks VHS is the future
• Jenni Wenni, the queen of questionable trivia and spontaneous toilet breaks.
• Wanted Joe, wanted in seven counties for excessive pun usage and crimes against radio.

Together, they’ll serve up a sizzling hour of dad jokes so bad they might be illegal, games so silly they make charades look like chess, and banter so retro it comes with shoulder pads and a cassette tape.

Expect:

• Competitive toast buttering
• A quiz round called “Is It a 1980s Gadget or a Fancy Cheese?”
• And the ever-popular “Guess That Breakfast Item While Blindfolded and Being Gently Pelted with Waffles”

(None of these games are included, but should be!)

Whether you’re a morning person or just here for the chaos, this show guarantees laughs, confusion, and possibly a mild existential crisis

📍 Live from Birmingham — where the sausages are hot and the jokes are lukewarm.