The SelfWork Podcast

“When I sat down to record this morning, I could only think of the many tragedies, caused by humans and by nature, that have been occurring for the last few weeks and months. I felt paralyzed. What did what I might have to say matter? Then I remembered a stranger’s kindness, and I smiled.” Dr. Margaret tells […]

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Parenting. It’s hectic, Complicated. Fatiguing. Wonderful. Meaningful. Frightening. One would think that it would be easier with two people doing it, and it is in many ways. But you can get in battles about everything from who’s the better parent to who cares the most to who is the better disciplinarian. Dr. Margaret offers four […]

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In today’s podcast, Dr. Margaret talks about a certain type of shame that’s rarely revealed after sexual abuse. What is that shame? It’s the result of your body responding with arousal during the actual abuse itself. What’s vital to understand is that arousal doesn’t reflect consent — not in any way. Dr. Margaret describes conditions […]

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No one has a “say” in the kind of parents we had. Some are lucky, and have parents who loved them deeply and cared for them in a healthy way. Many are not so lucky, and have to deal with very painful memories, the emotions that stem from them, and how their present life may […]

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There is a huge difference between divorce with children, and divorce without children. Dr. Margaret offers nine practical and do-able choices to make when living out your divorced life, with shared children. “Getting along for the children’s sake” can lead to your children to survive the divorce and thrive in their lives, whereas a continuation […]

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What is the relationship between self-esteem and self-acceptance? And how do you manage to hang on to either when you’re experiencing depression? Dr. Margaret gives you her perspective, with the offering that no one fact about you defines you as a person. She also describes the difference between resignation and acceptance, and how the latter […]

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Hiding or detaching temporarily from emotional pain is a healthy skill. If you have something hurtful happen, but you need to “get your act together” in order to work, or watch children, then knowing you can do that rather than being besieged by your pain, reflects emotional competence. However, people with Perfectly Hidden Depression have […]

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The Beck Depression Inventory has been used to identify depression for many years. But it will miss those with Perfectly Hidden Depression, due to the fact that they’d rarely allow themselves to reveal their pain, not even to a computer. Even people with more moderate classic depression may discount or deny their symptoms — no […]

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“I love you, but….” How do we handle criticism, even “constructive criticism” from people we care about? Often, not too well. That could be a problem with how it’s delivered, how we hear it, or both. Dr. Margaret discusses what makes critical feedback so difficult and offers ten ideas of how to get out of […]

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Today’s podcast is a little unusual. Dr. Margaret’s telling a bit of her own love story with the man she married almost 28 years ago. She wrote a post about their marriage in 2014 that went viral on The Huffington Post, which she’s going to share with you, along with a few back stories of […]

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