Thot Topics

It's been a while... we know we shouldn't have kept you waiting... but we're here now. Our Passover table makes room for friend of the pod and beloved Twitter gay @nickwaka24, and the conversation gets like, soooo girly. We discuss Bernie's campaign suspension, Charli XCX's possible asexuality and forthcoming album, then examine the Bhad Bhabie blackfishing scandal, and wonder about how celebs and influencers have turned cultural appropriation into another way to monetize their lives. (Spoiler alert: we're jealous!!) Then, in a moment none of us are proud to be excited for, we give our takes on the queens of Drag Race Season 12, including which muppet Brita is most reminiscent of, and whether or not Aiden Zhane is fishy. (SHE IS!!!) You'll definitely think it's fun, and you'll like the beat! Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC. 

This is the last week to secure Thot Topics merch! Production starts April 17. Shirts and stickers are available at thottopics.bigcartel.com, and you know they're adorable baby!! 

Ay, mami! The girls are by their lonesome once more to endure another week of torturous quar content. In the first-ever Thot Topics Latinxtravaganza, these dumb broads discuss Gay$ap Rocky and the treasure trove that lies in Azealia Banks's iCloud Drive, mistake Bad Bunny for being Mexican, and ponder whether or not his "Yo Perreo Sola" video is good for trans people. (Spoiler alert: no. lol) THEN, in an extra-special moment of love and care for the listeners, we compile a list of Thot Topics' Favorite Things wherein Cris comes out as an Ayn Rand supporter: books, movies, and music to get you through isolation, from Ex Machina to Uffie! 

Cop your T-shirts and stickers if you haven't yet! THOTTOPICS.BIGCARTEL.COM! Shouts to @fernandokonichiwa on Insta for the tee idea

Poppers and douches and urns, oh my! This week, the girls sit down for a little chitchat with Peter, aka @ratdad666, the perpetrator behind the infamous Charli XCX #Ashesgate to talk all things fly, hot, and sexy: mommorabilia, the manic depressive effects of the quar, ANIMAL CROSSING, the tanning arts, the new Dua Lipa album, and Poppy's bad metal music. Then, we look back on the ashes seen 'round the world, and wonder how much it really matters when a female pop star is willing to (in the words of famed sociologist Azealia Banks) "ride gay dick." As if!

AND HEY!!! WE'RE SELLING STICKERS AND T-SHIRTS! VISIT OUR STORE AT THOTTOPICS.BIGCARTEL.COM! THEY'RE SUPER AFFORDABLE AND TOTALLY ADORABLE!

Inbreastigative Journalists in the House (by Illinois state mandate)!!! This week, the girls are joined by friend of the pod Morgan mere minutes after her experience being tested for Coronavirus-- no, actually!!-- and ponder the possible fallout of the pandemic as it continues to spread like peanut butter! Then, alone once more, they unpack Paper Magazine's Lady Gaga cover story, go ham on Abercrombie's new "plus-size" "gay" "model" Michael McCauley, and wonder if non-hot people have a place in fashion and media. Get well soon, bitch! Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC. 

P.S. If you think you'd make a good guest on the show please hit our DM! We're looking to bring more girls and gays into the Thot Topics Cinematic Universe. Xo!

Live from another bitch's business, it's Thot Topics! This week, our girlbosses return to form and dive into the most hotly discussed music of the week, including Katy Perry's coming-out-as-a-straight-chick pregnancy ballad, Megan's baker-fucking banger, Ashnikko and the perils of TikTok music, and Bree Runway's capture of our hearts! Then, they begrudgingly talk about the abuse allegations against Drag Race's Sherry Pie, and wonder whether Drag Race (and drag in general) is ACTUALLY okay for kids to watch or participate in. Eow!

Call in, we're standing by! It was a slow news week, so this time, the girls dive into their listeners' burning questions: Is polyamory real? Can you be ace without a bowl cut? What if Joe Biden had a distant relative who weighed 700 lbs and had perfect politics, and ran in 2020 under the name Jo(anna) Biden? Wait-- those weren't your questions? Oh well, whatever! Sex education, the disproportionate targeting of starships of color, and why RedOne would have a hard time in the Matrix are all discussed. Sköl! Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.

These chicks clappin', and they AIN'T usin' hands! This week the girls are solo once again, but still hot and ready to discuss Shrek 4-D, Princess Nokia's Freudian youth pastor song, how Rihanna's bangs kept her from having stans, and the Freakum Dress Paradox. Then, as American dicks remain at half-mast for the ousting of Bernie staffer and beloved Twitter gay Ben Mora, they ponder what it might mean for the liberal consensus on identity politics and morality to continue unenCUMbered. Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.

Help! Our boobs are stuck to the pool deck! Our gals are joined by str8 m8 Will Okay (@okaymiz) over some DELICIOUS coconut sake to discuss the most pressing issues of early Shamrock Season: gay guys watching straight porn, Grimes' Linkin Park cover, Elon Musk's pussy body, Justin Bieber kissing your breasts, Pitbull, and your dad! Then, the code is cracked on what a gay male pop star would have to do to experience Beyonce-level success and acclaim: is it even possible?

Canvas for Thot Topics! This week, the himbos read the Iowa democratic caucus for filth honey (boots!), try to figure out who exactly is voting for Pete, settle the great Groupies vs. Boobies debate, get their ASS up, and take a stand against domestic violence lobbyist Nicole Scherzinger. Then, an exploration of what it means for Jameela Jamil to come out as a homosexual ahead of HBO's Important new fellatio competition, Legendary! Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.

Thot Topics, come to Brazil! This time, the girls cut loose and discuss the fallout of Nick's 100% correct Kesha review, the Shakira Bowl, Dua Lipa's revolution of the boring, funky white chick Meghan Trainor, the science of turning it, the difference between Bhad Bhabie and G-Eazy, and ELMO'S BIRTHDAY!!! Then, they hypothesize how the 2010's pop queens (Katy! Gaga! Rihanna!) could revive their careers to previous heights. Bon appetit, baby! Follow the girls @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.