Red rover, red rover... let Jerwin (@jerwin_gabriel) come over! We're SO fucking bored!! This week, we pathetically scramble to discuss "culture," AKA Katy Perry's journey of swollen, engorged struggle in the "Daisies" video, the Fran Tirado writeup in the failing New York Times, and why f-words need to stop comparing corona to AIDS. Then, Nick gets completely schooled in why Charli XCX's pandemic culture monopoly is actually justified. PLUS!!! At long last, we finally have an in-depth discussion on Season 12 of Drag Race (we tried to avoid this, it's not our fault we don't know who Ronan Farrow is!). God bless, baby!

Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.

The girls are back to disrupt the white male gays-- er, wait, gaze! We mean gaze. We got bored of talking about dumb faggot shit so we decide to step up the overall IQ of the show for at least one episode. But don't worry, we haven't forgotten all of our responsibilities: we review Instant Influencer, the new reality show/infomercial hosted by James Charles, and then take tiptoe ever so gingerly around Doja Cat's #1 hit and its Dr. Luke production. Then, we raise the stakes and freakin' live with it, baby: we tear apart the "hookup culture" discourse on gay Twitter, and decide whether or not "ironic racism" among the working-class is a real thing/how policing it might affect politics in the future. As usual, we prove that everyone who isn't us is wrong! Look out, she's pissed!

Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.

Well, we found another way to flap our nasty little gums for another hour, baby. Lucky you! This week, this exclusive ladies-only club gets away with murder: we give our spicy little takes on the death of Beyonce's girl-voice on the Savage remix, the non-event that was the Nicki Minaj x Doja Cat collab, Kehlani's new love-as-jihad album concept, plus, why we have to hold Arca to the same standard as anybody else who would name their song "Nonbinary." Everything that happened in the news this week was pretty out of our depth, so instead, we take a hot, sweaty jog down memory lane and give our rapidfire reviews of the most popular songs on Billboard, every year since 2006 (We can't remember anything before that! You're old enough to be our dad, anon!). We know you'll enjoy. Mwah!

Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.

We took a little break because nothing happened and also, frankly, we needed our beauty rest! But not to worry, we are back in full swing and ready to get wet 'n' wild with whatever you freaks were yammering on about online this week. We talk about finally making it out on the other side of corona panic, whether or not there is a black pride parade and why, r*cist League of Legends chatrooms, irish RIGHTS!, pride being cancelled and what it means for people who care about that. Then, we open our minds, hearts, ears, and holes for Charli XCX (again, I know, we're sorry, no one else is putting music out) and Flo Milli before diving into the Anthony Fantano/Fiona Apple review controversy. We put our boobs together and wonder: if people actually don't think music criticism is important, why do they care so much when a bad review comes out? One million more reps, ladies!

Also, we're compiling a YouTube playlist full of all the songs we've used on the pod and haven't paid for! Just making it easier for all the legal teams we'll be hearing from in the future. Give her a stream here if you so desire. 

For all who ordered merch, stickers are on the way soon! Our shirts are on backorder because of coroña (ugh) so they'll be just a bit longer. Love ya!

We is risen! Resident mansplainer and crisis top Will Okay (@okaymiz) emerges from the Thot Vault to play a quick and dirty little game of Over/Under based on listener suggestions! The results couldn't be juicier, and no one is safe: Solange, OnlyFans girls, skinny people, Dr. Pimple Popper, Nick's dermatologist, and that's not all! These brave chicks also swan dive into the murky waters of 2000's nostalgia, Bernie's Biden endorsement, and parents who dress their babies in designer clothing-- only to emerge dripping wet with the hottest takes in the game. Chag sameach, cunt!

The Thot Topics webstore closes this Friday, April 17! Get your shirts and stickers at thottopics.bigcartel.com! We thank you for all your support

It's been a while... we know we shouldn't have kept you waiting... but we're here now. Our Passover table makes room for friend of the pod and beloved Twitter gay @nickwaka24, and the conversation gets like, soooo girly. We discuss Bernie's campaign suspension, Charli XCX's possible asexuality and forthcoming album, then examine the Bhad Bhabie blackfishing scandal, and wonder about how celebs and influencers have turned cultural appropriation into another way to monetize their lives. (Spoiler alert: we're jealous!!) Then, in a moment none of us are proud to be excited for, we give our takes on the queens of Drag Race Season 12, including which muppet Brita is most reminiscent of, and whether or not Aiden Zhane is fishy. (SHE IS!!!) You'll definitely think it's fun, and you'll like the beat! Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC. 

This is the last week to secure Thot Topics merch! Production starts April 17. Shirts and stickers are available at thottopics.bigcartel.com, and you know they're adorable baby!! 

Ay, mami! The girls are by their lonesome once more to endure another week of torturous quar content. In the first-ever Thot Topics Latinxtravaganza, these dumb broads discuss Gay$ap Rocky and the treasure trove that lies in Azealia Banks's iCloud Drive, mistake Bad Bunny for being Mexican, and ponder whether or not his "Yo Perreo Sola" video is good for trans people. (Spoiler alert: no. lol) THEN, in an extra-special moment of love and care for the listeners, we compile a list of Thot Topics' Favorite Things wherein Cris comes out as an Ayn Rand supporter: books, movies, and music to get you through isolation, from Ex Machina to Uffie! 

Cop your T-shirts and stickers if you haven't yet! THOTTOPICS.BIGCARTEL.COM! Shouts to @fernandokonichiwa on Insta for the tee idea

Poppers and douches and urns, oh my! This week, the girls sit down for a little chitchat with Peter, aka @ratdad666, the perpetrator behind the infamous Charli XCX #Ashesgate to talk all things fly, hot, and sexy: mommorabilia, the manic depressive effects of the quar, ANIMAL CROSSING, the tanning arts, the new Dua Lipa album, and Poppy's bad metal music. Then, we look back on the ashes seen 'round the world, and wonder how much it really matters when a female pop star is willing to (in the words of famed sociologist Azealia Banks) "ride gay dick." As if!

AND HEY!!! WE'RE SELLING STICKERS AND T-SHIRTS! VISIT OUR STORE AT THOTTOPICS.BIGCARTEL.COM! THEY'RE SUPER AFFORDABLE AND TOTALLY ADORABLE!

Inbreastigative Journalists in the House (by Illinois state mandate)!!! This week, the girls are joined by friend of the pod Morgan mere minutes after her experience being tested for Coronavirus-- no, actually!!-- and ponder the possible fallout of the pandemic as it continues to spread like peanut butter! Then, alone once more, they unpack Paper Magazine's Lady Gaga cover story, go ham on Abercrombie's new "plus-size" "gay" "model" Michael McCauley, and wonder if non-hot people have a place in fashion and media. Get well soon, bitch! Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC. 

P.S. If you think you'd make a good guest on the show please hit our DM! We're looking to bring more girls and gays into the Thot Topics Cinematic Universe. Xo!

Live from another bitch's business, it's Thot Topics! This week, our girlbosses return to form and dive into the most hotly discussed music of the week, including Katy Perry's coming-out-as-a-straight-chick pregnancy ballad, Megan's baker-fucking banger, Ashnikko and the perils of TikTok music, and Bree Runway's capture of our hearts! Then, they begrudgingly talk about the abuse allegations against Drag Race's Sherry Pie, and wonder whether Drag Race (and drag in general) is ACTUALLY okay for kids to watch or participate in. Eow!