Untethering Shame

You asked, I listened. Starting in May, I’ll be diving into YOUR questions every Monday — unfiltered, raw, and real. Whether you're navigating shame, battling self-doubt, struggling with boundaries, or just wondering "How do I even start?"—this is your space to ask.

Nothing is off-limits (well, almost nothing). If you’ve ever thought “I wish I could ask Kyira this…”—now’s your chance.

💡 Here’s How It Works:

✔ Submit your anonymous (or named) question using the link below.
✔ Each week, I’ll pick one (or more!) to answer on the show.
✔ No shame. No judgment. Just real talk and radical acceptance.

📩 Submit your question now!

https://forms.gle/wW2X3KecvdQ8KEyR6

In this conversation, Kyira Wackett and Bronwyn Schweigerdt explore the themes of authenticity, healing, and the importance of connecting with one's core self. They discuss the challenges of modern life that distract individuals from their true selves, the significance of inner child work, and the impact of shame on emotional well-being. The dialogue emphasizes the necessity of self-approval and the journey towards reclaiming emotions to foster a more fulfilling life. In this conversation, Bronwyn Schweigerdt and Kyira Wackett explore the complexities of trauma, shame, and the healing process. They discuss how neglect can lead to feelings of shame, the importance of understanding our inner child, and the role of anger in self-discovery. The dialogue emphasizes the need for self-reflection and integration as essential steps in healing, while also acknowledging the challenges of navigating relationships with caregivers. Ultimately, they highlight the journey of self-discovery as a continuous process that requires compassion and understanding towards oneself.

We covered:

• Connection with others catalyzes personal growth
• The core self is essential for authentic living
• Quick fixes distract from deeper healing work
• Inner child work helps reconnect with our true selves
• Shame blocks access to our core self
• Feelings provide information about our needs
• Self-approval helps overcome external validation
• Both overt and covert trauma impact healing
• Healing requires time and patience
• Trust your intuition and gut feelings
• Shame often stems from childhood experiences
• Healing involves validating our inner child
• Anger signals underlying issues to address
• Self-reflection helps understand our patterns
• Integration of experiences enables growth
• Understanding guilt versus shame aids healing
• Both therapy and self-guided healing are valuable
• Self-discovery is an ongoing journey

More about Bronwyn:

“I am a licensed psychotherapist, podcaster and anger expert. My podcast is Angry at the Right Things. I have a masters in counseling psychology and another masters in nutrition.”

Connect with Bronwyn:

• YouTube
• LinkedIn

Ready to take the next step?

• Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.
• Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.
• Submit your AMA Question

Stay Connected:

• Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.
• YouTube
• Website

Chapters:

• 00:00 - The Magnetic Connection
• 03:00 - Exploring the Core Self
• 05:47 - The Journey to Authenticity
• 08:53 - The Inner Child and Healing
• 11:59 - Shame and Its Impact
• 14:59 - Reclaiming Our Emotions
• 18:13 - The Power of Self-Approval
• 21:02 - Understanding Anger and Shame
• 27:48 - The Inner Child and Self-Reflection
• 30:55 - Navigating Anger and Accountability
• 36:57 - Integration and Healing Process
• 46:34 - Embracing the Journey of Self-Discovery

In this episode of Untethering Shame, host Kyira Wackett and guest Kyley Caldwell explore the deep emotional ties between money and shame. They discuss how societal structures like capitalism, racism, and patriarchy shape our financial perceptions, often intertwining with personal traumas and self-worth. Kyley shares her journey of transforming money from a source of fear to one of empowerment, highlighting the role of internal healing and compassion. The conversation delves into the cyclical nature of financial struggles, the impact of childhood experiences, and cultural pressures on women and marginalized identities. Ultimately, they encourage listeners to reframe their relationship with money, embracing it as a tool for safety, belonging, and freedom.

We covered:

• Money is deeply emotional, symbolizing worth, safety, and belonging.
• Shame around money often stems from deeper emotional wounds, not just financial habits.
• Our childhood experiences and societal conditioning shape our financial beliefs.
• Mainstream financial advice overlooks the emotional complexity of money.
• We often chase financial success as a way to validate our self-worth.
• Healing our relationship with money requires self-compassion and internal work.
• Cultural and systemic structures can fuel feelings of inadequacy and shame around money.
• There is no “right” way to do money—allowing for learning eases financial stress.
• Redefining money as a source of love and empowerment can transform our relationship with it.
• Changing our internal state around money is key to broader systemic change.

More about Kyley:

Kyley Caldwell a coach, mystic, healer and seeker, devoted to emotional liberation — yours and mine.

Connect with Kyley:

• Instagram

Resources Mentioned:

• Money Magic FREE 2-Day Masterclass

Ready to take the next step?

• Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.
• Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.

Stay Connected:

• Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.
• YouTube
• Website

In this episode of Untethering Shame, Kyira Wackett explores the impact of conditional versus unconditional love and how many of us have been conditioned to believe that love must be earned. Drawing on the work of Bell Hooks and personal reflection, she unpacks how these beliefs shape our relationships, fuel shame, and keep us stuck in a cycle of proving our worth. Through awareness, self-compassion, and intentional boundary-setting, Kyira offers actionable steps to break free from this cycle and reclaim the truth that we are worthy of love—just as we are.

Ready to take the next step?

• Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.
• Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.

Stay Connected:

• Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.
• YouTube
• Website

In this conversation, Kyira Wackett and Jess Parente explore Brainspotting. The conversation delves into Brainspotting's effectiveness in addressing generational trauma, the importance of therapeutic safe spaces, and how childhood memories and attachment patterns influence personal growth. They examine the complexities of deep emotional work and discuss how underlying issues manifest in daily life, emphasizing the transformative potential for both personal relationships and self-discovery.

Throughout their discussion, Wackett and Parente share insights about the therapeutic journey, exploring how moments of connection and isolation emerge during treatment. They emphasize the vital roles of self-compassion and shame resilience, while acknowledging healing as an ongoing process. Their dialogue underscores how vulnerability, shared experiences, and emotional awareness contribute to lasting personal growth.

We covered:

• Brainspotting is a powerful therapeutic tool that uses eye positions to access trauma
• The body's signals and emotional grounding guide the healing process
• Creating safety and trust in therapy enables deeper exploration
• Vulnerability and radical ownership of feelings are essential for healing
• Childhood memories and generational trauma can surface during sessions
• Therapy can address negative subconscious beliefs and attachment patterns
• Connection with others and shame resilience foster self-compassion
• Healing is an ongoing journey requiring curiosity and openness

More About Jessica:

Jessica Parente is an ANCC-certified Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner, an ICF Accredited Somatic Trauma-Informed Coach, a Level IV Brainspotting Provider & a Best-Selling Author. Her chapter, “Lather, Rinse, Repeat… Until You Don’t” outlines her struggles with Codependency & is featured in Narcissistic Abuse Specialist Caroline Strawson’s most recent book, “The Unseen Wounds of Women.” As the founder of It Ends With You LLC, she is passionate about helping others identify their own subconscious and Codependent patterns so that they can heal, shift and step into a life that is authentic, intentional and true to themselves. As a Recovered Codependent & a Survivor of Grief, Trauma, Generational Trauma & Narcissistic Abuse, Jess pulls from her own journey to normalize client experiences and to instill hope these challenges are NOT a life sentence.

Connect:

• Listen to our first episode here
• ⁠Website⁠
• Email: [email protected]
• ⁠Facebook⁠
• Instagram: @generational.jess; @jessmolikewhoa (personal)
• Book

Ready to take the next step?

• Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.
• Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.

Stay Connected:

• Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.
• YouTube
• Website

Chapters:

• 00:00 - Excitement and Connection
• 01:54 - Introduction to Brain Spotting
• 06:03 - Understanding Eye Patterns and Emotions
• 10:01 - The Role of the Body in Healing
• 13:55 - The Challenge of Vulnerability
• 18:02 - Unlocking the Brain's Potential
• 24:19 - Creating Safe Spaces in Therapy
• 29:20 - Generational Trauma and Healing
• 32:12 - Understanding Attachment in Healing
• 39:47 - Deep Diving into Brainspotting
• 49:43 - Connection and Loneliness in Therapy
• 52:20 - Building Shame Resilience
• 57:00 - The Power of Brain Spotting
• 01:05:42 - Final Thoughts on Vulnerability

In this episode, Kyira Wackett and Lena explore the shadow self - those parts of ourselves we suppress due to shame and societal pressure. Through their discussion of personal and collective experiences, they examine how this suppression affects identity formation, emotional responses, and broader social dynamics. The conversation covers the importance of compassion in shadow work, the impact of cultural narratives and historical trauma, and the journey toward authentic self-expression and collective healing.

We covered:

• The shadow self represents hidden parts of our identity.
• Shame plays a crucial role in shaping our self-concept.
• Shadow work involves confronting and integrating suppressed aspects of ourselves.
• Suppression is a protective mechanism developed in childhood.
• Conformity often leads to the compounding of suppressed identities.
• Emotional responses are influenced by societal conditioning.
• Judgment and criticism reflect the shame of the criticizer.
• Navigating binaries can create fear and insecurity.
• Fear can shut down our ability to comprehend nuance.
• Cultural backgrounds can influence our self-expression. People of color should be treated equally and given the same opportunities.
• Acknowledging the shame and fear associated with claiming one's identity is crucial.
• Cultural narratives can perpetuate cycles of victimhood and oppression.
• Understanding historical trauma helps in addressing current biases.
• Shadow work involves recognizing and integrating parts of ourselves we often reject.
• Compassion for our shadow selves is essential for healing.
• Identifying what we judge in others can reveal our own shadows.
• Behavior should not define our identity; we are more than our actions.
• Iterative growth allows for self-forgiveness and acceptance.
• Embracing nuance fosters understanding and connection with others.

More about Lena:

Lena Papadopoulos is a trauma-informed educator, coach, facilitator, and consultant dedicated to supporting purpose-driven leaders and changemakers in creating a more inclusive, equitable world. She developed (R)EVOLutionary Change, a human-centered leadership framework that addresses trauma-based shadows in individuals, society, and systems. With nearly 20 years of experience in intercultural education, leadership development, and community building, Lena’s work integrates sociology, psychology, and evolutionary astrology to foster individual and collective liberation.

Connect with Lena:

• Email Lena
• Website
• LinkedIn
• Instagram

Ready to take the next step?

• Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.
• Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.

Stay Connected:

• Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.
• YouTube
• Website

Chapters

• 00:00 - Understanding the Shadow Self
• 02:48 - The Role of Shame in Identity Formation
• 06:12 - The Protective Mechanism of Suppression
• 09:05 - The Compounding Effect of Conformity
• 12:10 - Collective Disconnection and Emotional Responses
• 14:56 - Navigating Binaries and Fear of Nuance
• 21:01 - Exploring Identity and Cultural Backgrounds
• 26:20 - Systems of Oppression
• 28:50 - Cultural Narratives and Historical Trauma
• 36:06 - Compassion and Shadow Work
• 41:52 - Distinguishing Behavior from Identity
• 46:31 - Embracing Nuance and Growth

In this episode, Kyira Wackett explores cognitive rehearsal, a powerful mental tool that helps you navigate fear, self-doubt, and tough situations before they happen. By mentally rehearsing conversations and decisions, you can break free from worst-case-scenario thinking, build confidence, and create a plan for success. Tune in to learn how this practice can help you shift from feeling stuck in uncertainty to taking intentional action in your life.

Ready to take the next step?

• Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.
• Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.

Stay Connected:

• Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.
• YouTube
• Website

In this engaging conversation, Kyira Wackett and Emily explore the themes of self-expression and authenticity. They discuss the importance of letting go of self-censorship, the role of community in fostering self-discovery, and the challenges of navigating fear and shame. The dialogue emphasizes that self-expression is unique to each individual and that true connections arise from vulnerability and authenticity. The conversation serves as a guide for listeners to embrace their true selves and cultivate deeper relationships. In this conversation, Kyira Wackett and Emily Rose Utter explore the themes of shame, authenticity, and emotional depth. They discuss the importance of releasing shame to embrace one's true self, the necessity of inner child healing, and how the experiences of shame can transform into gifts. They also touch on the challenges of self-expression and the steps one can take to begin this journey, emphasizing the role of community and support in the process.

Takeaways

• Self-expression requires authenticity over performance
• Self-awareness and vulnerability foster deeper connections
• Self-censorship often begins in childhood
• Authenticity attracts abundance in relationships
• Our greatest gifts can emerge from past shame
• Community support is vital for healing
• Small steps toward self-expression create lasting change
• Shame can protect but also limit growth
• Inner child healing helps release past experiences
• Self-awareness initiates transformation

More about Emily:

Emily is a business coach with a decade of experience teaching clients how to make more sales through using self-expression as their guide & compass.

Connect with Emily:

• Facebook
• Instagram
• Website

Ready to take the next step?

• Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.
• Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.

Stay Connected:

• Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.
• YouTube
• Website

Chapters

• 00:00 - Setting the Stage for Authenticity
• 03:03 - The Journey of Self-Expression
• 08:56 - The Role of Community in Self-Discovery
• 15:08 - The Power of Authentic Connections
• 24:12 - Releasing Shame and Embracing Authenticity
• 28:19 - Inner Child Healing
• 35:20 - Transforming Shame into Gifts
• 40:11 - Taking the First Steps
• 45:01 - Connecting with Emily Rose Utter

In this conversation, Kyira and Amy discuss the pressing issue of children feeling like they are falling behind in education, particularly in the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic. They explore the origins of this fear, the impact of systemic issues in education, and the importance of understanding children's behavior as a form of communication. The discussion emphasizes the need for individualized learning approaches, the detrimental effects of labeling children, and the importance of changing mindsets around education and parenting. They advocate for a more supportive and understanding educational environment that recognizes each child's unique needs and experiences. In this conversation, Amy and Kyira explore the complexities of parenting and education, emphasizing the importance of emotional regulation, curiosity, and advocacy for children. They discuss the challenges within the school system, the need for personalized approaches, and the significance of allowing children to ask questions. The conversation also touches on the necessity of grieving parental expectations and embracing mistakes as part of the learning process. Ultimately, they advocate for a shift from compliance to connection in both parenting and education.

We covered:

• Falling behind is a dominant fear-driven motivation for parents and educators.
• The impact of COVID-19
• Children's behavior should be viewed as information, not problems.
• Individualized learning is crucial for children's success.
• The term 'behind' is detrimental to children's self-esteem.
• Comparison among children leads to a loss of joy and individuality.

• Parents should advocate for their children's unique learning styles.
• Understanding the context of a child's life is essential for effective education.
• Radical reform in education is necessary to address systemic issues. Emotional regulation and sensory processing are crucial for children.
• The school system often requires a context-driven approach for struggling students.
• Encouraging children to ask 'why' fosters curiosity and understanding.

• Grieving the loss of idealized parenting expectations is important.

• Compliance in children is often rooted in parental fears and societal expectations.
• Connection is more important than compliance in parenting and education.

More about Amy:

Amy Herzog, founder of Spark Joy with Amy, is a seasoned elementary educator and creative private tutor with 25 years of experience teaching children ages 3-12 years old. Her innovative methods not only enhance knowledge, personal growth, and relational connection, but also inspire confidence, curiosity, and critical thinking skills in young learners. Amy now dedicates her expertise to coaching homeschooling moms and educators, ensuring that children love learning for life.

Connect with Amy:

• Website
• Instagram
• Public Facebook Group
• YouTube

Ready to take the next step?

• Download the FREE handout, "5 Things Shame Resilient People Do Every Day" and start making those daily shifts to break that shame cycle that's keeping you stuck in that negative headspace.
• Book a free 25-minute discovery call to discuss different program options and find the support best fits your needs.

Stay Connected:

• Subscribe to the podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts and be sure to leave a review to let us know your thoughts on this episode.
• YouTube
• Website

Chapters:

• 00:00 - Introduction and New Year Reflections
• 02:59 - Understanding the Concept of Falling Behind
• 05:58 - The Impact of COVID-19 on Education
• 08:58 - The Role of Context in Learning
• 12:03 - Behavioral Issues and Mislabeling Children
• 14:50 - The Importance of Individualized Learning
• 17:58 - Changing Mindsets Around Learning
• 21:02 - Advocating for Children in Education
• 26:57 - Understanding Emotional and Sensory Needs
• 28:47 - Encouraging Curiosity in Children
• 32:05 - Grieving Parental Expectations
• 35:52 - Fostering a Love for Learning
• 39:11 - Embracing Mistakes in Parenting
• 44:51 - Empowering Educators and Parents

Have you ever walked into a room, and it suddenly felt silent? Or caught someone’s gaze and wondered what they were thinking? Maybe you texted someone and didn’t hear back for days. What was your immediate reaction—was it personal? In today’s solo episode, host Kyira Wackett explores how our brains often make us the central hub of every story, assuming that everything is about us. We’ll dive into how this thinking distances us from our authentic selves and how to shift focus back to living in our own stories.

Key Takeaways:

Reflection Questions:

Memorable Quotes:

Call to Action: