We live in a world that celebrates self-sufficiency and independence which is creating a culture of people who avoid asking for help. 

From the fear of appearing weak or needy, to the concern that we’re imposing when we DO ask for help, I often find that my clients don’t consider asking for assistance when they’re in situations that objectively warrant at least a second set of hands, if not another brain to help strategize a solution.

I'm not talking about the kind of help I offer my clients as a therapist — I’m talking about the simple human interaction of asking a person for advice, to borrow something, or to literally lend a hand.

There’s a downside to bypassing requests for help… we’re becoming more isolated than ever.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why humans struggle to ask people for help. 
• Why our hesitation to turn towards each other has contributed to a loneliness epidemic.
• The role social media plays in making us feel like we shouldn’t ask for help.

Whether you've struggled with asking for help yourself or you're curious about the intricacies of this universal experience, listen to this thought-provoking conversation that aims to shed light on why asking for help is so hard and how we can cultivate a culture of support and understanding.

Xxoo Darcy

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina.

Editing by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Preston Smith and Stephanie Sterling.

“We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

#AskingForHelp #AskForHelp #MentalHealthMatters #Vulnerability #BreakingBarriers #OvercomingFear #EndTheStigma #SupportSystem

#OpenUp #CourageToAsk #SpeakUp #MentalHealthAwareness #SelfCare #CommunitySupport #LetsTalkAboutIt #EmotionalWellness

#Empathy #YouAreNotAlone #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice #HealingJourney #RelationshipExperts

#RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #TherapyPodcast #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy

#DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

You can watch this episode here on YouTube.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jealousy is a normal human emotion.

We are all hardwired with the capacity to feel it. 

But in some of us, jealousy takes on a different form. 

It morphs into a force that controls the person prone to it, who in turn, attempts to control their partner as a means to mitigate their misery. 

Unfortunately, the path to healing jealousy doesn’t involve one’s partner. 

There’s no amount of rules that will quiet the endless worry that comes from obsessive jealousy. 

So, what do you do if you struggle with jealousy? And how do you know if your jealousy is the “normal” kind or the obsessive kind? 

I’ve got all your answers and more. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why some people are prone to Obsessive jealousy and others seem barely phased by jealousy.  
• How to know if your jealousy is the Obsessive kind. 
• How social media impacts people who struggle with jealousy. 

AND… I give you access to my most effective evidence-based tools so you don’t have to be controlled by jealousy anymore. 

Xxoo Darcy

REFERENCES

LINKS

• JealousyQuiz.com
• Watch this podcast here on YouTube

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

#Jealousy #RomanticJealousy #ObsessiveJealousy #CopingMechanisms #EmotionalIntelligence #OvercomingJealousy

#Boundaries #insecurity #HelpWithInsecurity #RelationshipGoals #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #Relationships

#RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling

#CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

#DeescalationTechnique #Assertiveness #ConflictTriggers #CalmingStrategies #ProblemSolving #ConstructiveFeedback #ConflictManagement #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice

#Relationships #Relationships #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcySterling

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

You’ve probably heard people throw around the phrase, “Love Languages.”  

The 5 Love Languages is a book written by Gary Chapman, a pastor from North Carolina, in which he posits that humans have 5 different ways we express our love for each other:

• Acts of Service
• Gifts
• Quality Time
• Touch
• Words of Affirmation 

The term itself makes innate sense because most of us have had relationships with someone who, intellectually, we knew loved us — but who didn’t do the things that would make us feel loved.

There’s something intuitive about the possibility that we just might speak different languages when it comes to love — and that our compatibility, or lack thereof — could make or break a relationship. 

Most weeks, I find myself translating the 5 Love Languages to one of my clients, and particularly, why their understanding of love languages isn’t enough to enable them to speak their love language fluently. 

In this conversation, you’ll learn 

• The biggest mistakes people make with Love Languages.
• What to do if your partner and you speak different Love Languages.  
• Whether it’s possible to have a love language other than the 5 Love Languages.
• How to use Love Languages when you’re in a long distance relationship.
• How to apply Love Languages to ALL your relationships. 

Xxoo Darcy

Have a question? Submit it here and I’ll answer on a future episode!

TOOLS/LINKS

What I Love About You Book 

5LoveLanguages.com

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani & Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

#DatingAdvice

#Relationships

#RelationshipPodcast

#RelationshipPodcasts

#RelationshipAdvice

#Relationships

#5LoveLanguages

#LoveLanguages

#RelationshipDynamics

#CommunicationStyles

#Communication

#EmotionalConnection

#UnderstandingPartnersNeeds

#ActsOfService

#WordsOfAffirmation

#QualityTime

#PhysicalTouch

#ReceivingGifts

#PersonalGrowth 

#BuildingIntimacy

#RelationshipAdvice

#ExpressingLove

#RelationshipCompatibility

#EmotionalIntelligence

#Love

#StrengtheningRelationships

#RelationshipTips

#RelationshipSkills

#DatingSkills

#RelationshipAdvice

#RealTalkRelationships

#PodcastLove

#DatingMistakes

#WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy

#Therapy

#CouplesCounseling

#CouplesTherapy

#DrDarcySterling

#DoctorDarcySterling

#DrDarcy

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As we wrap up another year, many of us look to January as a fresh start. It’s a new year — it feels like a blank slate — and it’s a time when we’re encouraged, at least in the western world and particularly in America, to reflect on our life and to pick a goal to strive for in the coming year — to try to improve something, or maybe kick a negative habit or trait.

I have complicated feelings about New Year's Resolutions. Mostly because the research is so grim when it comes to achieving them.

I love clients and students to have goals, but I’m a fan of long-term sustainable change. And the statistics on New Year's Resolutions just don’t bode well for succeeding long-term. 

People start off strong. But a poll conducted just this month by Forbes shows that by April — which is only month four on the path to a New Year's Resolution — 52% of people have abandoned their goal, with only 6% following through with a New Year's Resolution by year’s end. 

Also, why do we even set New Year's Resolutions? Or goals in general? Why are humans compelled to improve ourselves?

And if New Year's Resolutions aren’t the answer, what is?

In this episode of we need to talk with Dr. Darcy Sterling, you’ll find out: 

• What humans are actually trying to achieve by having a New Year's Resolution (and what to do instead).
• Why having a New Year's Resolution so often results in diminishing incentives to stick to it as we get closer. 
• The most effective fuel source that you can tap into at any time to increase your momentum when you’re striving for a goal. 
• The 1 thing to change about yourself in the coming year, if you really care about being happier. 

Xxoo Darcy

Question? Submit it here and I’ll answer on a future episode!

REFERENCES

https://www.forbes.com/health/mind/new-years-resolutions-statistics/

https://www.history.com/news/the-history-of-new-years-resolutions

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling and Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Bart Migal and Stephanie Sterling. Our theme music is by Trending Music. 

“We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

 DISCLAIMER

#NewYearsResolutions #NewYearsResolutions2024 #NewYearsResolution2024 #NYR2024 #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Exes… 

We all have them. Even if they’re ex friends or family members. 

Exes are people from our past who historically occupied a critical place in our tribe and for whatever reason, no longer do. 

Knowing what to do with an ex can be tricky.

Because we miss them. 

Sometimes we still love them.

But does that mean they should be welcomed back into our life?

In this episode, you’ll get answers to questions like: 

• How soon is too soon to be friends with an ex?
• Is it ever advised to get back together with an ex?
• How do you co-parent when you hate your ex? 
• How do the rules change when it's an ex versus an ex spouse?
• How do you handle splitting friends and family when in some cases the ex has been in your life for 20+ years?

Xxoo Darcy

Have a question? Submit it here and I’ll answer on a future episode!

REFERENCES

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Bart Migal and Stephanie Sterling. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

#Dating

#DatingTips

#DatingAdviceForWomen

#DatingAdviceForMen

#DatingAdvice

#Relationships

#RelationshipPodcast

#RelationshipPodcasts

#RelationshipAdvice

#ExTalk

#Relationships

#Breakups

#Heartbreak

#ExFiles

#LoveGoneWrong

#DatingDrama

#MovingOn

#PastLove

#LoveLost

#BreakupAdvice

#DatingStories

#HealingJourney

#PostBreakupLife

#CoParenting

#BreakupRecovery

#RelationshipAdvice

#SupportiveExes

#RelationshipExperts

#EmpoweredHeartbreak

#LoveAfterLoss

#RealTalkRelationships

#BreakupDiaries

#PodcastLove

#DatingMistakes

#WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy

#Therapy

#CouplesCounseling

#CouplesTherapy

#DrDarcySterling

#DoctorDarcySterling

#DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We go to great lengths to avoid having fights — especially with our partners.

But is that sustainable? Or even achievable? 

What does it say about your relationship if you’ve never had a fight? 

And is it always a red flag when you start fighting? 

We need to know how to navigate difficult conversations in all our relationships, and occasionally that means having the skills to manage a disagreement or a fight. There are rules to fair fighting, just like in boxing. And you need to know how to manage a fight if you’re hoping to have a secure attachment to the people you’re in relationships with. Because it turns out that when done artfully (which IS possible), making it through a disagreement can make you feel closer, better understood, and more secure.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why avoiding having fights leads to problems.
• How to disagree without being disagreeable.
• How to express your needs in a loving way.
• How to get comfortable with having serious conversations (or at least decrease your discomfort!). 
• How to handle things when it turns into a fight.

PLUS, I give you access to one of my most effective tools — but you’ve got to listen to the episode to know how to use it, so don’t delay. Hit PLAY!

xo Darcy

REFERENCES

• The Art of Fighting Part 1
• The Art of Fighting Part 2
• Rules of Fighting Fair
• The High-Conflict Couple: A Dialectical Behavior Therapy Guide to Finding Peace, Intimacy, and Validation
• Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples: Third Edition Paperback
• The Love Prescription: Seven Days to More Intimacy, Connection, and Joy (The Seven Days Series)
• Relationship Skills Bootcamp: A college level course on relationships skills.
• Gottman Institute - The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling

TOOLS

• Emotional Temp Here
• How To Communicate When You Disagree With Your Partner 

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling and Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Bart Migal and Stephanie Sterling. Our music is by Trending Music. 

Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani. 

“We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

 DISCLAIMER

#Dating #RelationshipTips #RelationshipAdviceForWomen #RelationshipAdviceForMen #DatingAdvice #RelationshipAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipSkills #RelationshipPodcast

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Holidays are complicated. They’re pitched as a season of joy but we all know they come with added pressures, more responsibilities, and close proximity to our history, which isn’t always positive.

Everyone has their unique associations with what the season means, what’s expected of them, and what they expect from others. But the common denominator — other than joy — is stress. We all feel it, even if the pleasure we get outweighs it.

Holidays can be especially difficult for young adults (and those of us who love them) as they’re thrust back into a family system that everyone’s had distance from for years. 

And we haven’t even discussed the impact that political discussions can have…

In this episode of We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling, I prep you for ALL the dreaded topics, most of which are well-meaning, but can land with a sting.

From navigating questions like, How’s your love life? 

To exiting the provocative political questions — we cover it all — with takeaways at every turn. 

Including: 

• 5 Questions your young adult will thank you for NOT asking them. 
• Why you can’t think your way through difficult conversations when you’re heated?
• How to keep your long-term goals in mind while you’re breaking bread with Uncle Pauly who votes for the other side.

By the end of today’s conversation, you’ll have the tips you need to ensure that your holiday season is as peaceful as possible, and possibly even happy!

REFERENCES

Effect of sunlight and season on serotonin turnover in the brain. Volume 360, Issue 9348, 7 December 2002, Pages 1840-1842

Warm It Up with Love: The Effect of Physical Coldness on Liking of Romance Movies Jiewen Hong and Yacheng Sun. Journal of Consumer Research Vol. 39, No. 2 (August 2012), pp. 293-306 (14 pages), Oxford University Press.

LINKS TO PRODUCTS

• Sun Light Therapy
• Non alcoholic drinks link here

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling and Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Bart Migal and Stephanie Sterling. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Emma Budakçı and Amanda Cristiani. We Need To Talk is a Sterling Standard Production.

DISCLAIMER

#Holidays

#HolidayTips

#HolidayStress

#HolidayBreakups

#HolidayHookups

#HolidayHookup

#HolidayDating

#TimeManagement

#FamilyDynamics

#Boundaries

#Gratitude

#Resilience

#HolidayTraditions

#EmotionalWellbeing

#StressReduction

#HolidayStressReduction

#MentalHealth

#CommunicationSkills

#Expectations

#BalancingResponsibilities

#SocialConnections

#HolidayJoy

#WorkLifeBalance

#CopingStrategies

#Self-Care

#SelfCare

#Mindfulness

#YoungAdults

#YoungAdulthood

#HoliDating

#Dating

#Relationships

#WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy

#WeNeedToTalk

#Therapy

#DrDarcySterling

#DoctorDarcySterling

#DrDarcy

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Therapy… 

Everyone knows you should do it at some point in your life, but how do you know if you’ve got the right therapist, or if you’re in the right kind of therapy? 

In this very candid conversation, I give you answers to all your questions, like: 

• How many sessions will it take to know if it’s working?
• What the hell are you supposed to talk about in therapy, anyway?
• How much should I know about my therapist?
• Are there questions or topics that are off limits?
• What if I’ve caught feelings for my therapist? 
• How frequently should I be going to therapy? 
• Should I stop therapy when I’m no longer in a crisis?
• How active should I be in making sure therapy is moving in the right direction?

PLUS, I share about my own personal therapy experiences — especially the bad ones — so you can know what therapy should and should NOT be. 

I’ll also tell you what to do if your own therapy isn’t progressing and how to partner with your therapist and share your feelings in a way that we’re trained to welcome — so you can get the most out of your experience!

By the end of today’s conversation, you’ll feel like you’ve been a fly on my office wall, because you’ll be armed with answers that most people never get access to. 

PS: If you are a therapist, this episode is a public service that I implore you to listen to. Learn from my negative therapy experiences and bypass the wounding mistakes many of my own shrinks have made. 

Xxoo Darcy

REFERENCES

Cost of therapy in America

Therapist on IG who will find you a therapist

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling and Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Bart Migal and Stephanie Sterling. Our theme music is by Trending Music. 

DISCLAIMER

#TherapyQuestions 

#TherapyAnswers

#AskATherapist

#FindATherapist

#FindACounselor

#HowToFindATherapist

#WhatToSayInTherapy

#WhyGoToTherapy

#TherapyGoals

#HowLongAreCounselingSessions

#HowLongAreTherapySessions

#WhatHappensInCounseling

#WhatHappensInTherapy

#WhatShouldITalkAboutInCounseling

#WhatShouldITalkAboutInTherapy

#HowDoesTherapyHelp

#WhatNotToAskATherapist

#WhyGoToTherapy

#WhyGoToCounseling

#WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy

#Therapy

#Counseling

#CouplesCounseling

#CouplesTherapy

#DrDarcySterling

#DoctorDarcySterling

#DrDarcy

#DoctorDarcy

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dating, in general, has always induced equal amounts of excitement and dread in my clients and students. But in today’s world of digital dating, the overwhelm is at an all time high, as is dating burnout. 

In this episode, I give you the tips you need to date smarter — not harder. 

You’ll learn how to optimize your online profile, which I learned when I was the Global Ambassador to Tinder, and those hacks work the same on every platform. 

Stop agonizing over:

• Which pictures to use
• Which prompts to select
• How long the bio should be
• How much time to spend checking your app. 

I will give you all the answers.

Then, we break down exactly What To Do and What Not To Do on the first date:

• How quickly do you move from app to first date?
• What are the essential questions to ask early on to pick a compatible partner?
• Who pays?
• How much alcohol is too much?
• How to spot red flags.
• How to decide if you want a second date?

Dating doesn’t have to be dramatic. I’m here for you. 

REFERENCES

11 Ways to Upgrade the Hell Out of Your Tinder Profile

How To Make A Tinder Profile That Stands Out In All The Best Ways In 2023

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling and Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Darcy Sterling, Bart Migal and Stephanie Sterling. Our theme music is by Trending Music. 

Special thanks to Emma Budakçı, Emma Martens and Amanda Cristiani. 

“We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.