Years ago, I was gutted by a falling out with one of my siblings. It quickly became clear that we were on the verge of estrangement, and that impending loss brought me to my knees —I had just recovered from PTSD and was terrified of getting sucked into the black hole of trauma that I’d just come through. 

Frantic for help, I found myself Googling a solution, and up came the term Forgiveness Therapy. 

To be clear: I was not feeling forgiving. But I was feeling desperate. I did not want to revisit the darkness I’d just emerged from. 

A book on forgiveness had recently been published by a professor named Robert Enright. In it he posits that forgiveness isn’t about cutting the other person slack. It’s a life raft for people who feel wronged. Enright’s theory had been peer-reviewed the gold standard in the field of psychology — so, despite my apprehension, I committed to following his program. 

Today, my journey through forgiveness comes full circle in my conversation with the theorist himself, Dr. Robert Enright. 

If you struggle with anger or are someone who holds grudges and you want to explore a solution, please listen to this episode. 

In it, you’ll learn:

• Why it makes sense if the thought of forgiving someone who wronged you makes you cringe.
• The consequences of not forgiving.
• How choosing to forgive puts you in control of your feelings.
• How Enright’s program helped me to personally bypass a relapse of PTSD.

AND… The beauty of this process is that there’s NO obligation to reconcile with the person who wronged you.

Xxoo Darcy

Akhtar, S., & Barlow, J. (2018). Forgiveness Therapy for the Promotion of Mental Well-Being: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis. Trauma, Violence, & Abuse, 19(1), 107-122. https://doi.org/10.1177/1524838016637079

Freedman, S., & Zarifkar, T. (2016). The psychology of interpersonal forgiveness and guidelines for forgiveness therapy: What therapists need to know to help their clients forgive. Spirituality in Clinical Practice, 3(1), 45–58. https://doi.org/10.1037/scp0000087

Reed, G. L., & Enright, R. D. (2006). The effects of forgiveness therapy on depression, anxiety, and posttraumatic stress for women after spousal emotional abuse. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 74(5), 920–929. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-006X.74.5.920

International Forgiveness Institute

Ask Dr. Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a Choice: A Step-by-Step Process for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope

#ForgivenessHeals #Forgiveness #SelfForgiveness #ForgivenessIsFreedom #ForgivenessTherapy #ForgivenessIsKey #LetItGo #LettingGoOfThePast #LettingGoOfFear #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy #DrRobert Enright

Instagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling  Threads:@drdarcysterling 

YouTube:@DarcySterling   Watch this episode here on YouTube. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We all learn relationship skills in our formative years during childhood — for better or worse. As adults, it’s up to us to assess which of those skills serve us and to unlearn those that don’t. 

Whether or not you’re a parent, I promise this episode is relevant for you.

In this candid conversation with parenting expert Dr. Jennifer Weberman, we drill down on how everyday experiences provide children (and provided us as children) with opportunities to learn relationship skills — even when we fu@k up. 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why some of us were a bad fit for our parents — and what the consequences of that were. 
• How making mistakes in front of children can provide them with some of the most important relationship skills (and how trying to hide those moments can backfire).
• Biggest mistakes parents make when they’re trying to make up.
• Dr. Weberman-recommended smartphones for children WITHOUT social media! 

Xxoo Darcy

Kid-friendly phones/4 options:

• GABB
• Bark
• Troomi 
• Pinwheel

Dr. Weberman’s Website: TransformationsTherapyCenter.com

Dr. Weberman’s Parenting Resource Suggestions: 

• The Conscious Parent: Transforming Ourselves, Empowering Our Children by Dr. Shefali Tsbary
• The Whole Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind by Daniel Siegel and Dr. Tina Bryson
• Brain Body Parenting: How to Stop Managing Behavior and Start Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids by Dr. Mona Delahooke

Dr. Weberman’s Socials:

Instagram:@drjenniferweberman

Facebook:drjenniferweberman

Tik Tok:@drjenniferweberman

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production.

DISCLAIMER

#ParentingPodcast #ParentingTips #Parenting101 #ModernParenting #RaisingKids #ParentingHacks #MomLife #DadLife #Parenthood #ParentingAdvice #HealthyFamily #ChildDevelopment #PositiveParenting #FamilyWellness #ParentingJourney #ParentingCommunity #ParentingWisdom #ParentingSupport #RealParenting #relationshipgoals #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #drdarcy #DrJenniferWeberman

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

Threads:@drdarcysterling

Watch this episode here on YouTube. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Lately, my conversations with clients + friends involve talk about exhaustion. There’s a general sense of burnout — a fatigue that weekends and time off no longer cures. 

 Which makes sense to me from a mental health perspective. 

 Life, particularly in recent years, has felt incredibly unpredictable, and as humans, we can tolerate a lack of predictability for short periods of time. But we’ve had several years of unpredictable events without a reset.  

And when individuals have to endure a rinse and repeat of uncertainty without fully healing before the next event hits, is that they become vulnerable to Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Because these are the circumstances that create it.

So, if it’s true that we’ve been steeped in all the elements that create PTSD for years, then something else ALSO must be true: 

 We, as individuals and as a society, must be capable of experiencing something called Post Traumatic Growth (PTG), which you may not have heard of but by the end of this conversation, you’ll probably be conversant in it.

  Today’s guest — my first guest on We Need To Talk — is Robert Mack.

Robert is a leading expert in the field of Positive Psychology. He holds a Master’s Degree from the University of Pennsylvania, and he’s the author of Happiness From The Inside Out. He and I met on the set of Famously Single and I invited him here to share what Post Traumatic Growth theory says about the potential for profound personal growth following trauma. And whether it’s true or hype that individuals who recover from traumatic experiences can emerge stronger, wiser, and more resilient than before.  

In this episode you’ll learn: 

• Why some people emerge from PTSD with PTG.
• The specific traits YOU need to cultivate to increase the odds that you emerge from horrible events stronger than you were before.
• How to use principles from Positive Psychology to remain resilient and grounded as we advance further into 2024. 

Please share this episode with someone who needs it.  

REFERENCES

“The Posttraumatic Growth Inventory: A Revision Integrating Existential and Spiritual Change”Richard G. Tedeschi, Arnie Cann, Kanako Taku, Emre Senol-Durak, Lawrence G. CalhounJournal of Traumatic Stress, 18 January 2017 https://doi.org/10.1002/jts.22155Citations: 153

 “A Meta-Analytic Clarification Of The Relationship Between Posttraumatic Growth And Symptoms Of Posttraumatic Distress Disorder.” Journal of Anxiety DisordersVolume 28, Issue 2, March 2014, Pages 223-229. Journal of Anxiety DisordersJane Shakespeare-Finch, Janine Lurie-Beck.

 "Posttraumatic growth, meaning in life, and life satisfaction in response to trauma." - This study investigated the relationship between post-traumatic growth, meaning in life, and life satisfaction, contributing to the understanding of how these factors interconnect. Triplett, K. N., Tedeschi, R. G., Cann, A., Calhoun, L. G., & Reeve, C. L. (2012). 

DISCLAIMER

#PostTraumaticStressDisorder #PostTraumaticGrowth #PositivePsychology #PTSD#PTSDRecovery #PTSDAwareness #PTSDSurvivor #RobertMack

#PTSDSupport #Dating #DatingTips #RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling Threads:@drdarcysterlingWatch this episode here on YouTube. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I have walked countless people through romantic breakups over the years, and almost universally, I’m told that the most painful part of the breakup is losing their best friend. 

Which is why I wanted to dedicate an entire episode of We Need To Talk to the heartbreak we endure when we break up with a friend. 

The loss of a friendship can be gut-wrenching.

And it’s made worse by the absence of a socially sanctioned ritual around that loss.

We know how to support a friend who’s had a romantic breakup - but we don’t have a ritual for supporting loved ones who’ve lost a platonic loved one. Which sends us the message that the loss of the relationship shouldn’t devastate us, because after all, it was just a friendship. But then, where do we go with our grief? 

In this episode, we cover: 

• Why friendship breakups are so uniquely difficult. 
• How to decide if a friendship is salvageable. 
• How to navigate the situation when you and your ex-friend share other friends.

And I share my own story about ending a friendship several years ago. Questions? Comments? Email us at [email protected]

Xxoo Darcy

REFERENCES

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

 DISCLAIMER

#FriendshipBreakup #friendsarefamily #friendsarethefamilyyouchoose #friendsareforever #friendsarefamilytoo #friendsarethefamilywechoose #Relationships #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling Twitter:@DrDarcySterling YouTube:@DarcySterling   

Threads:@drdarcysterling Watch this episode here on YouTube. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

There’s a new term in the workplace that describes a behavior that’s existed for as long as I can remember: Quiet Quitting. 

It’s when an employee is dissatisfied with their job and rather than resigning, they do the bare minimum (and sometimes less) to remain employed. But they’re basically checked out. They’re going through the motions to avoid having to deal with the stress that comes from changing their job.

Today I want to use that term and apply it to what we do with loved ones when we “quietly quit” our relationships. 

It’s not something most of us do consciously. But we all do it to some extent. 

I’m talking about the soft exits we unintentionally take and how those exits result in creating distance in our relationships.  

These are things that look, at least on the surface, like normal everyday activities. 

I want to talk about how seemingly benign activities can drain energy from our relationships because they keep us too busy for deep connection. And how eroding intimacy over time can lead to the kinds of exits that tend to be terminal in relationships: Like affairs. 

Questions? Comments? Email us at [email protected]

Share this episode with a friend! 

Xxoo Darcy

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

#RelationshipTalk #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipGoals #RelationshipExperts

#RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling

#DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

Threads:@drdarcysterling

Watch this episode here on YouTube. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

• Can a relationship still be successful if you’ve got one without the other?  
• Which is more important in sustaining a long-term relationship?
• What exactly is “compatibility” anyway?
• What the single most important ingredient in relationships is.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

I hate hearing, “You’re too sensitive.” Maybe because when I’ve been on the receiving end of it, a flood of shame has followed. 

On the rare occasion when it hasn’t made me hang my head, a defensive retort has usually flown out of my mouth, leaving me feeling like I just validated the judgment that was hurled at me, and I feel even worse.

There’s something about “sensitivity” that causes people to discourage it. As though it’s an internal dial that “sensitive” people are choosing to keep at maximum volume.

So what is it about emotional sensitivity that’s so off-putting to people? That’s the question I want to answer today, along with: 

• Why is the ability to repress emotions often seen as a strength? 
• What’s the price we pay for repressing our feelings?
• Is it possible that we’re looking at sensitivity the wrong way? 
• Could sensitive people actually have a higher emotional intelligence?

Share this episode with someone who needs to hear it. 

Xxoo Darcy

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

#SensitiveSoul #EmotionalIntelligence #EmpathyMatters #FeelingsMatter #MindfulLiving #EmotionalWellness #Sensitivity #VulnerabilityTalk #Empathy

#EmpathyInAction #InnerStrength #EmbraceFeelings #ExpressYourself #SensitivityAwareness #OpenHeartTalk #Relationships #RelationshipPodcasts

#RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling

#CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

Threads:@drdarcysterling

Watch this episode here on YouTube. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Alright, Couples! I am here to celebrate you today and hopefully to inspire you with unique ways to honor your love today and throughout the year. 

Last week we explored how singles can gracefully handle Valentine's Day, acknowledging that not everyone is in a relationship — which is perfectly fine. This week we delve into how couples can celebrate this day in meaningful ways.

Here’s what you’ll get answers to in this episode:

• How to celebrate Valentine’s Day when you’re not particularly romantic.
• My views on “Special Occasion” sexual acts as gifts.
• How to ensure that your partner and you are aligned in your expectations of 2/14.
• Ways to make Valentine’s Day kid-friendly (and why I think it’s important that you do).
• How to take the money piece out of it and still deliver.
• What NOT to buy your partner on Valentine’s Day.

I spent 3 hours researching unique gift ideas that will NOT break the bank and will land on your partner’s soul the way you’d want!

Happy Valentine’s Day to all who celebrate 🖤 

Xxoo Darcy

GIFT IDEAS

For Consumers

• Modern Mix Tape 10% off with code DrDarcy
• OMG Yes 
• For Star Gazers 
• Getting Lost  
• Birthstone Bracelet 
• Manscape Grooming Kit.
• Nice bottle of bourbon 
• Curious Elixirs 

For Romantics 

• Why I Love You Jar
• I’ll Do Your Thing
• Never Have I Ever Eaten This Stuff
• Acts of Kindness Jar
• We’ll do it your way tonight  
• Dinner Scavenger Hunt

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

#CouplesGoals #LoveWins #Romance #BeMyValentine #Sweetheart #ValentineVibes #ValentineDate #SpreadLove #LoveIsInTheAir #ValentineGifts

#TogetherForever #ValentinesDayForCouples #ValentinesDay #RelationshipGoals #ValentinesVibes #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #RelationshipExpert #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling

#CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling

Threads: @drdarcysterling    

Watch this episode Here on YouTube.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Valentine’s Day rubs a nerve in me.

It makes me feel very protective of the single people in my life.

I hate that we have a holiday that underscores everyone’s relationship status.

My mind continuously goes to how February 14th makes singles feel — especially women. 

Which is why this episode is dedicated to SINGLES. 

Today, I celebrate you. 

Not in the trite ways we see on social media. 

You’ll get no suggestions of “personal care” from me today. 

What you WILL get is answers to:

• Why we feel so much pressure to have an intimate relationship.
• How to navigate 2/14 if you’re in a “situationship.”
• How to take the weight off the day if it’s making you feel less-than.
• How to have fun as a single on Valentine’s Day.

Mostly, I want all my SINGLES to know that there is nothing wrong with being single. Which is why I’m celebrating you today.

Xxoo Darcy

GIFT IDEAS

For Consumers

• Modern Mix Tape 10% off with code DrDarcy
• OMG Yes 
• For Star Gazers 
• Getting Lost  
• Birthstone Bracelet 
• Manscape Grooming Kit.
• Nice bottle of bourbon 
• Curious Elixirs 

For Romantics 

• Why I Love You Jar
• I’ll Do Your Thing
• Never Have I Ever Eaten This Stuff
• Acts of Kindness Jar
• We’ll do it your way tonight  
• Dinner Scavenger Hunt

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina. Editing by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

#LoveYourself #SinglesAwarenessDay #SingleonValentinesDay #ValentinesDayForSingles #ValentinesDay #SingleAndThriving #CelebrateYou

#NoValentineNoProblem #ValentinesVibes #EmbracingIndependence #RelationshipGoals #DatingAdvice #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast

#RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice #RelationshipExperts #RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #RelationshipExpert #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

Threads:@drdarcysterling

Watch this episode here on YouTube.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We live in a world that celebrates self-sufficiency and independence which is creating a culture of people who avoid asking for help. 

From the fear of appearing weak or needy, to the concern that we’re imposing when we DO ask for help, I often find that my clients don’t consider asking for assistance when they’re in situations that objectively warrant at least a second set of hands, if not another brain to help strategize a solution.

I'm not talking about the kind of help I offer my clients as a therapist — I’m talking about the simple human interaction of asking a person for advice, to borrow something, or to literally lend a hand.

There’s a downside to bypassing requests for help… we’re becoming more isolated than ever.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why humans struggle to ask people for help. 
• Why our hesitation to turn towards each other has contributed to a loneliness epidemic.
• The role social media plays in making us feel like we shouldn’t ask for help.

Whether you've struggled with asking for help yourself or you're curious about the intricacies of this universal experience, listen to this thought-provoking conversation that aims to shed light on why asking for help is so hard and how we can cultivate a culture of support and understanding.

Xxoo Darcy

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina.

Editing by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Preston Smith and Stephanie Sterling.

“We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production. 

DISCLAIMER

#AskingForHelp #AskForHelp #MentalHealthMatters #Vulnerability #BreakingBarriers #OvercomingFear #EndTheStigma #SupportSystem

#OpenUp #CourageToAsk #SpeakUp #MentalHealthAwareness #SelfCare #CommunitySupport #LetsTalkAboutIt #EmotionalWellness

#Empathy #YouAreNotAlone #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #RelationshipPodcasts #RelationshipAdvice #HealingJourney #RelationshipExperts

#RealTalkRelationships #PodcastLove #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #Therapy #TherapyPodcast #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy

#DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy

Instagram:@drdarcysterling 

Facebook:Dr.Darcy Sterling

Tik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  

Twitter:@DrDarcySterling   

YouTube:@DarcySterling   

You can watch this episode here on YouTube.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.