Down Suboxoneway you can go to Timmies and Dunkin Donuts all you want and the bathroom is free but they do have a toucan and a gorilla who come to life like FNAF on day 4 of Tina. Joe Arpaio is being buried in a pink suit against his will

https://www.patreon.com/posts/160434381

They sell all sorts of crazy phone cases now and some of them have space for credit cards and some of them have space for your thing. Hawaii's state flag is the Confederate flag with a swastika in the middle. Bait Car Karaoke is all Lostprophets and Gary Glitter. Fifi threads were a vibe.

Despite being prohibited by most lease agreements, the breeding of wasps can be both fun and educational, particularly when combined with active birding that functionally resembles indirect brood parasitism. Silento sneezed out his intestines after eating spicy eggs at the prison diner and Macron's wife had a Fisherman's Friend fall out of her pant leg because he left it in her Pousseaeaux

I hate how they make you go home at the end of the day even if you applied the proper cooling gel the entire time you were having a day siesta just because Mr. Sir wants to power trip. Future Fights is stuck in the past and we need to free it. The quality of the Beethoven movies is inversely correlated to the quality of the symphonies they were named after. There is going to be a roast of Jada Pinkett Smith hosted by Tony Hinchcliffe just to test if Will Smith is rehabilitated from slapping

🎼Beethoven's 3rd (1955, Philharmonia Orchestra conducted by Otto Klemperer)

My aunt is thicker than the wicked bible and a brick put together and her monstrous caboose is slowly colonizing Mohegan Sun from the inside and all they can do is sell her fake Swisher Sweets that are just fly paper filled with flies and honey. David Blaine did a fake trick to a dog with balloons but he was behind the door lifting him up and everyone thought it was Criss Angel and David Copafeel. Donkeys deserve respect

https://www.patreon.com/posts/157998302

Once more we return to the topic of geese. The beast not the band but they will be at Bonnaroo this year and apparently you can sneak in boxed wine in a baby stroller and fireworks in a guitar case and say you might be asked to fill in for someone onstage because that happened when Keith Moon passed out at a Who concert after drinking too much boxed wine out of a baby stroller. But, as Maury Povich knows, it's not your father's concert.

Do you spin or does the duck spin? How much torque do you need? Duck Dynasty refused to tell us because it was a trade secret and they actually preferred Medium Fish with No Teeth. Definitely not a sturgeon. The Dexter of Molesters is a HERO and Sonic is the Burlington Coat Factory of former roller skate restaurants

https://www.patreon.com/posts/156696327

Work boots are a great place to hide just about anything and it works even better if the person is deaf, dumb and blind but most people they teach you were deaf dumb and blind were actually faking. We need Carlos Mencia to come back as the ChudPunisher but he better not get nervous like Ron White. Brought to you by The Dirtbag Network

We used to have Elvis Presley and now we have no pressies but we do have Mr Beast making a human centipede so big that he can beat Wilt Chamberlain's body count in under 40 minutes. No one knows what they meant by 3 6 9 but it was probably two parking meters halfway through being cut off and then Cloaca Luke is beside them bent over getting a cloacoscopy

https://www.patreon.com/posts/155647827

Nancy was poppin bloops listening to Peep in her Unalive Boys hoodie and every time you overhear two uncs they only ever talk about that but lesbians have no test for it. If you go to the dog park and have to step over something so big you have to use a shop vac and never clean it out you know it was left by someone with mental health

🎼Unalive - Dream Baby Dream