Why are Americans so uncomfortable around sadness and grief? Cultural psychologist Matthew Whoolery has lived and taught all over the world—from Egypt to India to Bulgaria—and he’s learned something surprising: in many cultures, emotional pain is shared, not hidden.

In this episode of Uncomfy, Professor Whoolery chats with host Julie Rose about the time his Egyptian students cried with him after his father died and why their immediate response of closeness and community shocked his American sensibilities. He shares how our Western obsession with individualism can make grief worse and what we can learn from other cultures about caring for others in times of need.

Matthew Whoolery’s most recent TEDx Talk, “We Are Not Okay” - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOBkk3EU0_8

Matthew Whoolery’s Substack - https://substack.com/@culturalpsychologist

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Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/07/what-american-culture-gets-wrong-about.html

CHAPTERS

00:00 Introduction

00:38 Cultural Differences in Handling Grief

01:11 Personal Stories of Grief

02:44 Cultural Scripts and Empathy

04:16 Impact of Cultural Differences

06:04 Radical Empathy and Connection

14:34 Practical Steps to Support Others

16:34 Conclusion and Call to Action