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Ten days! Ten days was the amount of time between me telling him I was filing for divorce and actually filing. The papers were all ready when I told him. I told him on Saturday and planned to file on that Monday. Had the appointment all set up. But he asked if I could give him a week.
Why? He wanted time to think about it. I said, “It won’t make any difference. Nothing is going to change.” He said that he just wanted time to let it soak in. That I had had time to think about it, but this was news to him. News?? For two years now, I had been telling him that I was done. For two years, nothing existed between us. This was certainly not a surprise to him. But I agreed to give him one week. So what did those ten days look like?

When I Actually Filed, Part Two

Covert narcissistic abuse crushes one’s soul. This podcast is devoted to understanding covert narcissistic abuse, its effect on the victims, and how to heal.

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Survivors of covert narcissistic abuse feel like they are going crazy. They often tell me that they are losing their mind. They don’t know which end is up, what reality is or what to do next. They are often frozen in self-doubt and confusion.
This is because of cognitive dissonance. In this episode, I am going to help you understand what cognitive dissonance is, why it happens, and what to do about it.
Cognitive dissonance is when a single individual holds conflicting attitudes or beliefs within themselves. This goes hand in hand with living with a covert narcissist. It creates that fog that you hear so many talk about. Coming out of the fog is coming out of the cognitive dissonance.
You have forgotten what life is supposed to feel like. You have forgotten how to relax and enjoy the beauty of life. You have forgotten what it feels like to be you! It is time to remind yourself!!
I wish you much peace on your journey of healing!

What is Cognitive Dissonance and What to do About it (Special Throwback Episode)

Trauma causes people to make changes in the way they interact with their world. Emotional abuse is traumatic. It takes away one's perception of safety. When we experience trauma, our system will work hard to re-establish a perceived sense of safety. Thus we pick up survival skills that can become walls between us and others. What behaviors do we pick up in response to covert narcissistic abuse? What about our kids? What traits are they picking up?
 

It is so crucial to do some trauma healing, for yourself and then learn to help your children. I have recently become certified in trauma coaching. I do offer individual trauma-informed coaching. It’s time to help our kids while they are still young. I will be focusing more on this in my podcast. Visit my website at http://www.covertnarcissism.com It’s time to break these cycles. I wish you so much peace on your journey of healing.

 

 #Parenting #covertnarcissism #abuse #gaslighting #narcissism #podcast 

Covert Narcissism: His Trauma Became Our Trauma

Financial abuse and manipulation can come with the appearance of being loving and caring. Covert narcissists will say that they are doing this “for your own good.” In the guise of helping you, they use and abuse you. At the same time though, there is just enough truth in what they are saying to convince you that they are right. This tiny speck of truth activates your compassion, causing you to feel guilty for doubting them or questioning them. Instead you take all the blame and work harder to fix your perspective.
 
In this guest episode, Crystal shares her story of financial abuse. In her words he was a “serial entrepreneur who gave her a great sales pitch.” 
 
#Parenting #covertnarcissism #abuse #gaslighting #narcissism #financialabuse 

Financial Abuse Disguised as Compassion

Today, we have the author of The Human Magnet Syndrome, Ross Rosenberg. I talk with him about his new book, The Codependency Revolution: Fixing What Was Always Broken. 
What is this monster called codependency that no one seems to understand? It is so hard to understand narcissism, and it is equally hard to understand codependency. In Ross’s words, “I see codependency as a relationship problem, not an individual problem. A codependent is defined by their choice of relationship partners. To understand codependency, you have to understand pathological narcissism.” On this dive down the rabbit hole of narcissism, let’s also dig into the concept of codependency.
 
https://www.selfloverecovery.com/

Exploring a Different Perspective of Codependency with Ross Rosenberg

In this episode, our guest talks about the financial abuse she endured in a lengthy marriage with children. No matter how many failures or the depth of the failures, covert narcissists will always find someone or something to blame. Scapegoating accompanies the financial abuse, as they blame you for their financial struggles. They simply cannot carry any of the blame themselves. It is never a shared responsibility. You, their supply at one point in time, are often the main target of their scapegoating and the main victim of their financial abuse.
 
#Parenting #covertnarcissism #abuse #gaslighting #narcissism #covertnarcissist 

When I Actually Filed, Part Two

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