Ever had a moment where you were certain you were in the right—only to realize the other person felt just as strongly that they were the real victim? That’s exactly what happened to psychologist Kurt Gray.

As a teenager, Gray nearly caused a car accident while driving with his friends. What followed was an explosive confrontation—one fueled by outrage and the deep conviction that each party had been wronged. That heated moment didn’t just shake him—it sparked a career-long fascination with moral psychology.

Why do we get so emotionally charged in moments of perceived injustice? And more importantly, how can we break through these cycles of outrage to find common ground?

Gray, now a professor of psychology and neuroscience at the University of North Carolina and author of Outraged: Why We Fight About Morality and Politics and How to Find Common Ground, explores how our moral instincts shape our reactions—and how understanding them can help us bridge the divides that seem deeper than ever.

Can you think of a time when you felt your perspective or worldview challenged, and instead of getting defensive, you chose to stick with the discomfort? We’d love to hear your story! Send it our way at [email protected], or reach out on Instagram @uncomfy.podcast. And if this episode got you thinking, share it with a friend—you never know what kind of conversation it might spark!

If you enjoyed this episode, you won’t want to miss another Uncomfy conversation where a car accident takes an unexpected turn, leading to an unlikely friendship. - https://youtu.be/zO6bQJ4M23M

Related Links

Gray’s book, Outraged: Why We Fight About Morality and Politics and How to Find Common Ground - https://outragedbook.com/

Gray's Website - https://www.kurtjgray.com/

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