WTF is AuDHD?

This week, we’re diving into a big one: having children as an AuDHD adult. Neither of us are parents (yet - or possibly ever), so this is not a how-to, but an open conversation about the thoughts, fears, and feelings we have around parenting as neurodivergent people.

We speak honestly about the differences in our perspectives (Paige and Ellie don’t feel the same way!), and share the thoughts and experiences sent in by our community - from those who are already parenting with AuDHD, to those who’ve chosen not to, and everything in between.

One day, we’ll revisit this topic with actual parents and experts - but for now, consider this a first step in holding space for the complicated and very human feelings that come with the idea of having kids when your brain is wired like ours.

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We're diving into what it’s really like navigating work with AuDHD. We chat about our personal job histories - the burnout, the boredom, the passion, and the pivots - and why sticking to one career path can feel impossible. If you’ve ever loved and hated your job at the same time, or blamed yourself for not being “cut out” for work, this one’s for you. You’re not lazy - you’re likely unsupported. We also remind you (and ourselves) to not lose self-compassion - it's so important to not turn on yourself!

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Why is AuDHD so hard to manage and treat? In this episode, we explore lived contradictions of having both ADHD and autism - where one part of your brain craves routine and the other thrives on chaos, often resulting in burnout. We share real-life examples from ourselves and you - our listeners! We unpack why treatments often fall short, and highlight how young the concept of AuDHD really is - including in clinical settings.

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In this episode, we’re excited to be joined by Mike Cochrane (@nzpsychologyclinic), a Clinical Psychologist and fellow AuDHDer who specialises in Autistic, ADHD and AuDHD assessments. We had an insightful and validating chat about life with an AuDHD brain.

Together, we unpack:

• Commonly missed traits in ADHD and autism
• How to get a diagnosis
• Why diagnosis often comes with both relief and grief
• Strategies for navigating executive dysfunction and overwhelm
• How CBT and ACT can support AuDHDers - and when they fall short
• The recent legislation change in NZ allowing GPs to diagnose ADHD
• The importance of self-understanding, unmasking, and neurodivergent-led therapy
• and more!

We thoroughly enjoyed this chat and if you'd like more information about Mike Cochrane and his diagnosis process, head to nzpsychologyclinic.co.nz

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Autism or trauma - or both? In today’s episode, we (very basically) unpack the complex relationship between Complex PTSD (CPTSD) and autism. We explore the ways the two can look similar, why autistic people are more likely to experience trauma, and why it’s so important to approach self-identification with care and curiosity. We reflect on personal experiences, share research insights, and offer guidance for anyone navigating these diagnoses.

With so many of you finding value in our conversations, we thought it was important to touch on this point. This episode only scrapes the top level of this topic so we strongly encourage you to do your own research.

Neurodivergent insights article we reference: https://neurodivergentinsights.com/ptsd-and-autism/

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If you’re constantly exhausted no matter how much you feel like you're resting, it might autistic, ADHD or AuDHD burnout (and yes, it's different from traditional 'burnout'). Our neurodivergent brains are different and therefore the causes and treatment for burnout need to be neurodiversity affirming. We unpack the causes of ADHD, autistic, and AuDHD burnout, what we've experienced, how it can be confused for depression and why traditional therapy may not work for you. Below are some resources we reference in the episode - as always, please continue to do your own research!

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SOURCES:

@vivdawesautistic (Instagram) and WEBSITE with (paid) resources

Handy (paid) Burnout Workbook

Prevention for AuDHD Burnout - article here

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Getting an ADHD or autism diagnosis - especially later in life - can bring an avalanche of emotions: relief, validation, anger, grief, confusion, and imposter syndrome. In today’s episode, we talk about the messy, beautiful, and often overwhelming feelings that come before and after a diagnosis.

We share real community stories and our own experiences of trying to make sense of this new identity, processing the past, navigating conversations with family, and wrestling with the fear of not being believed - especially when autism (in particular) is still so misunderstood.

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This week, we’re diving deep into justice sensitivity - the intense emotional reaction many AuDHDers have to unfairness, inequality, and being misunderstood.

We explore what justice sensitivity actually is, how it shows up differently in autism and ADHD, and why it’s more than just being “too sensitive. We share our own real-life examples and strategies to cope when injustice feels personal.

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Feeling lonely even when you're surrounded by people? You're not broken and you're not alone. In this episode, we unpack loneliness, friendship struggles, and the invisible barriers that come with having both ADHD and autism (AuDHD). We unpack why so many ADHDers and autistic people struggle with connection, friendship maintenance, and burnout, even though a lot of us crave closeness more than anything.

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What is RSD? Is it just an ADHD thing? Is it trauma? In this episode, we’re breaking down Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria - a common but sometimes misunderstood experience in the ADHD community. We explore how RSD affects people with ADHD and autism, why it might develop, and how it shows up in everyday life. Plus, we share personal stories, examples, and strategies to cope when rejection feels like danger.

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