In this episode: Did anyone ever tell you that being a PEOPLE PLEASER is a core trait in ADHD/AuDHD Humans? In this episode, I’ll tell you all about it. Spoiler Alert: It has to do with our coping mechanisms that we developed early on in order to avoid rejection and seeking validation from others due to our feelings of inadequacy because of our (especially undiagnosed) ADHD/AuDHD. And get Set Boundaries Find Peace for 20% off with my unique link to Bookshop Dot Org - click here for your copy

SHOW NOTES:

For bonus episodes, transcripts, video classes, AMA’s, a private chat community and more - go GET A LOT in the “You Are a LOT” podcast Patreon community. Start with a 7-day-free-trial at any level, and when you join take 15% off if you subscribe annually.

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15% Off HUGIMALS weighted stuffed animals

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20% off UnHide Weighted Blankets & PIllows

30 FREE DAYS to BRAIN FM Wire Your Brain For Focus!

Send an email to the podcast at alotadhdpod at gmail dot com

SOURCES USED FOR THIS EPISODE:

Why ADHD Makes You Feel So Much

How Can I Stop People Pleasing At Work?

Are You A People Pleaser?

ADHD & People Pleasing: What’s The Correalation?

Set Boundaries Find Peace

In this episode: ADHD/AuDHD humans often struggle with boundaries—whether it's setting them with others or even recognizing our own internal limits. We might not realize a boundary needs to be set until it's already been crossed, leaving us overwhelmed, resentful, and frustrated. In this episode, I talk about how impulsivity, time management challenges, and emotional regulation difficulties all play a role in why boundary-setting can be so hard for us. And get Set Boundaries Find Peace for 20% off with my unique link to Bookshop Dot Org - click here for your copy SHOW NOTES:

🎉 Right now I’ve got a special discount if you join the “You Are A Lot” podcast Patreon annually - you get 25% off any tier! Get a year for $24-$79 only depending on your tier. CLICK HERE and use code: 29A43 (Bonus episodes, transcripts, live online events, private chat community and more!)

And get Set Boundaries Find Peace for 20% off with my unique link to Bookshop Dot Org - click here for your copy

Click here to write a 5-star review of the podcast

Visit the “You Are A Lot” (an ADHD/AuDHD Podcast) webpage

Subscribe to the “This Is A Lot” Newsletter

Jen’s Unique Link For 15% Off HUGIMALS weighted stuffed animals

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Jen’s Unique Link for 20% off UnHide Weighted Blankets & PIllows

Jen’s Unique LInk for 20% off Books at Bookshop Dot Org

Send an email to the podcast at alotadhdpod at gmail dot com

SOURCES USED FOR THIS EPISODE:

Poor Boundaries and ADHD - Sachs Center

How To Create Healthy Boundaries When You Have ADHD

Focused Mind: Boundaries and ADHD

Focused Mind: Learning To Say No With Adult ADHD

Why Is It So Difficult To Set Boundaries?

Set Boundaries Find Peace - Nedra Glover Tawwab

In this Jen Chat I talk about the origin of the term "Asperger's Syndrome" and why it's no longer used. The short answer: Nazis. I'm reading a book about Hans Asperger, the Austrian pediatrician who worked with the Nazis but claimed not to be one of them. To this day the idea of how "functioning" an autistic person is seems to be deeply and darkly rooted in only what their value to the workforce is - and not their value as a human being. Get 20% off of the book “Asperger’s Children: The Origins Of Autism In Nazi Vienna” using my unique link to Bookshop dot org - a great website that buys from indie booksellers and helps them stay in business.

SHOW NOTES:

Use my unique link for 20% off books at Bookshop dot org. A great resource if you don’t have an indie bookstore near you - and want your books mailed to you fast. Check out my lists of recommended mental health reading:

Jen’s Recommended ADHD Friendly Mental Health Books

Jen’s Recommended books/memoirs about ADHD

Jen’s Recommended books/memoirs about Audhd/Autism

Jen’s Recommended therapy books about love/relationship issues

EPISODE INFO: This week’s episode is Patreon only but you can listen to it if you are one of the first 50 people to CLAIM YOUR FREE ONE MONTH to the Tier #2 of the “You Are A Lot” Podcast Patreon. Click here to claim!

Patreon Only Episode 39: “Skeptical of Scams & Cults?” In this episode: In response to last week’s episode about reasons why ADHD/AuDHD Humans sometimes have a bigger chance of  being drawn into cults, MLM’s and other sketchy setups - there is an equal and opposite argument that people with ADHD/AuDHD are actually MORE EQUIPPED to spot scams and avoid getting sucked into cults and sketchy situations.

SHOW NOTES:

Click here to claim your ONE FREE MONTH of Tier #2 Patreon Membership.

Here is what you get with a Tier #2 Membership:

☕️AD-FREE EPISODES

☕️EARLY RELEASE ON SUNDAYS ****(Before the public release of on Mondays)

☕️IMAGE & CAPTION VIDEO VERSIONS OF EVERY EPISODE (for those who like to read along and look at things as they listen)

☕️MONTHLY PATREON ONLY BONUS EPISODE (with image & caption & transcript)

☕️DOWNLOADABLE PDF TRANSCRIPT OF EVERY EPISODE (edited by Jen, not AI so they're easy to read and all research highlighted - print them out and make your own ADHD book!)

☕️QUOTE GRAPHICS with ADHD facts (colorful, factual, downloadable and easy to share on your social media)

☕️ PRIVATE CHAT COMMUNITY with other neurodivergent members of this podcast Patreon

In this episode: Did you know that ADHD/AuDHD Humans have a bigger chance of being drawn into cults, MLM’s and other sketchy setups? I explain why we are targets (hint: our impulsivity, need for community and outsider feelings) and talk about how to spot red flags.

SHOW NOTES:

For bonus episodes, transcripts, captioned videos, AMA’s with Jen, a private chat community and more - go GET A LOT in the “You Are a LOT” podcast Patreon community. Start with a 7-day-free-trial at any level, and when you join take 15% off if you subscribe annually. CLAIM YOUR FREE 7 DAY TRIAL

Hugimals 15% Off LInk

Visit the “You Are A Lot” (an ADHD/AuDHD Podcast) webpage

Subscribe to the “This Is A Lot” Newsletter

Jen’s Recommended Mental Health Books at 20% Off

Send an email to the podcast at alotadhdpod at gmail dot com

SOURCES USED FOR THIS EPISODE:

Telehealth Company Accused Of Fraud

Psychology Today: Phishing

Email Fraud: The Search For Predictors Of Susceptibility

Social Media Overwhelmed With Scams

Media Matters: Tik Tok Enables Predatory ADHD Ads

The Root Counseling: Multi-level Marketing Schemes

Does ADHD Create Vulnerability To High Control Groups?

In this episode: Jen breaks down the ins and outs of PDA; Pathological Demand Avoidance or Pervasive Drive for Autonomy. She chats about why even the simplest requests can feel like too much and how people with PDA handle those constant demands. Jen looks at the behaviors, challenges, and some ways to work on keeping a sense of autonomy even when triggered.

SHOW NOTES:

For bonus episodes, transcripts, captioned videos, live online events with Jen, a private chat community and more - go GET A LOT in the “You Are a LOT” podcast Patreon community. Start with a 7-day-free-trial at any level, and when you join take 15% off if you subscribe annually.

CLAIM YOUR FREE 7 DAY TRIAL

Visit the “You Are A Lot” (an ADHD/AuDHD Podcast) webpage

Subscribe to the “This Is A Lot” Newsletter

Buy a “You Are A Lot” Podcast Mug

Buy a “You Are A Lot” Podcast Sticker

Buy an “I Am A Lot” Tote Bag

Shop Jen’s Amazon Storefront for ADHD supplies!

Shop Jen’s Digital Download Guides For ADHD

Send an email to the podcast at alotadhdpod at gmail dot com

SOURCES USED FOR THIS EPISODE:

Defining Symptoms of PDA from PDA Society

The discovery of PDA from Psychology Today

Changing The Name To Pervasive Drive For Autonomy

Dr. Megan Anna Neff on PDA vs. Neurodivergent Traits

Causes of PDA on Neurosparkhealth website

PDA in Adults from Psychology Today

PDA Coping Strategies from PDA Society

In this episode: Jen answers a question from a listener regarding medication for ADHD. Jen gives researched information about what to discuss with your doctor such as; things to consider when doing trial and error with ADHD medication, the different types of medication available and what they do, how meds interact with various life situations, and why it’s a more complex issue than a podcast is equipped to solve but luckily - Jen can give a LOT of sourced facts in one place that helps everyone know what they should be talking about with their prescriber.

SHOW NOTES:

For bonus episodes, transcripts, captioned videos, live online events with Jen, a private chat community, and more - go GET A LOT in the “You Are a LOT” podcast Patreon community. Start with a 7-day free trial at any level, and when you join take 15% off if you subscribe annually.

7 Day Free Patreon Trial

Click here to write a 5-star review of the podcast

Subscribe to the “This Is A Lot” Newsletter

Shop Jen’s Digital Download Guides For ADHD

Shop Jen’s Amazon Storefront for ADHD supplies!

Visit the “You Are A Lot” (an ADHD/AuDHD Podcast) webpage

Send an email to the podcast at alotadhdpod at gmail dot com

SOURCES USED FOR THIS EPISODE:

“You Are A Lot” Podcast Episode 14: ADHD & Estrogen

ADHD Medication: ADDitude Magazine

ADHD Medication Quick Facts: ChADD Organization

In this episode: Jen talks about the other side of masking which is unmasking! She explains how we can safely and consciously choose to un-mask, the risks for some of unmasking, and how we may find ourselves unconsciously unmasking as people around us say things like, “You’re acting more ADHD/Autistic ever since your diagnosis.” But it’s not an act. It’s our authentic selves coming through.

SHOW NOTES:

For bonus episodes, transcripts, captioned videos, live online events with Jen, a private chat community and more - go GET A LOT in the “You Are a LOT” podcast Patreon community. Start with a 7-day-free-trial at any level, and when you join take 15% off if you subscribe annually.

CLAIM YOUR FREE 7 DAY TRIAL

Visit the “You Are A Lot” (an ADHD/AuDHD Podcast) webpage

Subscribe to the “This Is A Lot” Newsletter

Buy a “You Are A Lot” Podcast Mug

Buy a “You Are A Lot” Podcast Sticker

Buy an “I Am A Lot” Tote Bag

Shop Jen’s Amazon Storefront for ADHD supplies!

Shop Jen’s Digital Download Guides For ADHD

Send an email to the podcast at alotadhdpod at gmail dot com

SOURCES USED FOR THIS EPISODE:

What ADHD Masking Looks Like

ADHD Masking: Does Hiding Your Symptoms Help Or Harm?

Masking Is Life

7 Masks We Use To Hide Our Faults

Why ADHD Masking Is A Form of Self-Sabotage

Why Un-Masking In ADHD Can Help Us

Unmasking As A Black Neurodivergent Employee

In this episode: Jen talks about the exhausting art of masking with ADHD and/or AuDHD. She explores why so many of us feel the need to mask (both consciously and unconsciously), what the very real consequences of masking are and when it benefits those of us with ADHD.

SHOW NOTES:

For bonus episodes, transcripts, captioned videos, live online events with Jen, a private chat community and more - go GET A LOT in the “You Are a LOT” podcast Patreon community. Start with a 7-day-free-trial at any level, and when you join take 15% off if you subscribe annually.

CLAIM YOUR FREE 7 DAY TRIAL

Visit the “You Are A Lot” (an ADHD/AuDHD Podcast) webpage

Subscribe to the “This Is A Lot” Newsletter

Buy a “You Are A Lot” Podcast Mug

Buy a “You Are A Lot” Podcast Sticker

Buy an “I Am A Lot” Tote Bag

Shop Jen’s Amazon Storefront for ADHD supplies!

Shop Jen’s Digital Download Guides For ADHD

Send an email to the podcast at alotadhdpod at gmail dot com

SOURCES USED FOR THIS EPISODE:

What ADHD Masking Looks Like

ADHD Masking: Does Hiding Your Symptoms Help Or Harm?

Masking Is Life

7 Masks We Use To Hide Our Faults

Why ADHD Masking Is A Form of Self-Sabotage

Why Un-Masking In ADHD Can Help Us

Unmasking As A Black Neurodivergent Employee

In this episode: Did you know that people with ADHD/AuDHD are vulnerable to ending up in toxic relationships (of all kinds)? You are not broken and neither is your “picker”. There is science behind this. It’s due to our issues with communication, impulsivity, low self-esteem, and that old need for dopamine! This episode may make you feel sane and help your confusion as to how you got here - especially if you don’t have any “big T” trauma in your upbringing.

SHOW NOTES:

For bonus episodes, transcripts, captioned videos, live online events with Jen, a private chat community and more - go GET A LOT in the “You Are a LOT” podcast Patreon community. Start with a 7-day-free-trial at any level, and when you join take 15% off if you subscribe annually.

7 Day Free Patreon Trial

Click here to write a 5-star review of the podcast

Subscribe to the “This Is A Lot” Newsletter

Shop Jen’s Digital Download Guides For ADHD

Shop Jen’s Amazon Storefront for ADHD supplies!

Visit the “You Are A Lot” (an ADHD/AuDHD Podcast) webpage

Send an email to the podcast at alotadhdpod at gmail dot com

SOURCES USED FOR THIS EPISODE:

The Gaslighting Risk For Adults With ADHD

Gaslighting: Recognize Manipulative And Emotionally Abusive People

Why Do Toxic Relationships Swallow People With ADHD?

Autistic People Might Be More Susceptible To Abusive Romantic Relationships

Alexithymia & Manipulation