Anger Secrets

166 - How to Handle Anger in Your Relationship


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For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.

Have you ever gone to bed replaying an argument over and over in your mind, wishing you’d said things differently, wishing you’d stayed calmer or wishing the damage hadn’t been done?

If so, you’re not alone. And more importantly, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad partner or a bad person. It means something inside you is trying to tell you something, and learning how to listen to that signal can change everything.

In this episode of The Anger Secrets Podcast, host Alastair Duhs shares four practical, grounded strategies to help you handle anger in your relationship before it causes regret, distance or lasting damage. Rather than suppressing anger or blaming yourself, you’ll learn how to understand what’s really driving it, and how to respond in a calmer, more constructive way.

Anger isn’t the real problem. Losing control of it is. And that’s something you can learn to change.

What you’ll learn in this episode

  1. Why understanding your anger triggers is the first step to lasting change
  2. How poor communication quietly fuels resentment and emotional explosions
  3. The powerful link between stress and anger, and how to break it
  4. A simple mindset shift that helps couples stop fighting each other and start working together
  5. Why anger is a signal, not a flaw — and how to respond to it differently

Why this matters

Unmanaged anger doesn’t just disappear on its own. Over time, it erodes trust, creates emotional distance and can turn even small disagreements into painful conflicts.

The good news? When you understand what triggers your anger, learn how to communicate openly, manage stress and remember that you and your partner are on the same team, arguments lose their intensity and connection becomes possible again.

These aren’t complicated techniques. They’re practical skills you can start using immediately.

Key ideas from the episode

  1. Anger often comes from feeling unheard, disrespected, or overwhelmed — not from the situation itself
  2. Regular, safe conversations (like a Weekly Relationship Check-In) prevent resentment from building
  3. High stress lowers your ability to stay calm — managing stress is essential to controlling anger
  4. When couples stop trying to “win” arguments and start seeking understanding, everything changes

Ready to take the next step?

If you want help applying these ideas to your own relationship, you have a few options:

-Watch the free training on how to break the anger cycle

-Book a free 30-minute Anger Assessment Call to talk through your situation

-Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System

You’ll find all of these at angersecrets.com.

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Anger SecretsBy Alastair Duhs

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