Relationship Renovation: Marriage Advice, Intimacy & Couples Communication

223 - Code Word: Transform Your Arguments With This Simple Relationship Tool


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Purchase the Relationship Renovation at Home Online Course.

Are you tired of conflicts with your partner escalating and leaving you both feeling disconnected?

Curious about a proven system that helps couples pause, self-regulate, and return to emotional safety—even in the heat of the moment?

Want to model healthier conflict resolution for your kids and transform the dynamic of your entire household?

Tarah and EJ Kerwin take you deep into the transformative power of the “code word” system—a real-world tool that has enhanced their marriage and countless others. Discover how couples can use a simple, playful word to hit the pause button before arguments spiral out of control. The hosts share step-by-step guidance on identifying when you’re outside your window of tolerance, negotiating how long to separate, and what to do during your break so you return to the conversation more grounded and connected. Plus, they address the science behind emotional dysregulation, practical tips for using code words with kids around, and the importance of healthy reconnection after conflict.

Loaded with relatable stories, actionable exercises, and heartfelt encouragement, this episode will motivate you to create new, healthier patterns in your relationship, whether you’re struggling with frequent arguments or just want more emotional safety and intimacy. Ready to learn the code word approach that Tarah and EJ have used for nearly a decade? Tune in and start transforming the way you and your partner handle conflict. You’ll walk away with a concrete, science-backed system for building a stronger, more connected partnership—and maybe even some new ideas for your personalized code word!

Visit relationshiprenovation.com for more tips and resources to elevate your partnership and emotional well-being!

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Relationship Renovation: Marriage Advice, Intimacy & Couples CommunicationBy EJ and Tarah Kerwin

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