Black Girls Heal

#261: The Importance of Pacing While Dating + Checking In


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In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we dive into a major milestone — our very first video podcast episode! After years of audio-only recordings, I am showing up in video to connect with you more intimately. 


I start with a heartfelt check-in, sharing my personal experiences of transitions and the collective 'hell' many of us have gone through recently in various aspects of our lives. 


Today's episode is all about understanding the importance of pacing in dating for love addicts, discussing how unresolved traumas, father wounds, and touch starvation can lead us to rush into relationships. Learn practical steps on how to pace yourself, maintain your identity, and find joy in your current life while still holding space for the love you desire. 


Plus, get updates on the new format of the Recovery School and upcoming changes in my services. This episode is packed with insights and actionable advice to help you on your journey to healing and self-love.


In this episode, we cover…

  • 04:09 Navigating personal transitions
  • 06:05 Why you should embrace the unknown
  • 13:22 Healthy Love vs. Love Addiction
  • 19:14 The importance of pacing in relationships
  • 30:06 Leveling up in healing
  • 32:22 How unresolved father wounds affect pacing in relationships
  • 39:09 What is touch starvation?
  • 47:30 How to ground in your own life
  • 54:20 Upcoming changes and announcements to Black Girls Heal


Resources mentioned in the episode:

  • Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.
  • Book a 1:1 private coaching session with Shena until November 2024.
  • Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.


Connect with us:

  • Website: Blackgirlsheal.org
  • Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal
  • TikTok: @blackgirlsheal
  • Facebook: Black Girls Heal


Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.



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Black Girls HealBy Shena Lashey

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