Have you ever noticed how, in certain seasons of life, several people around you seem to struggle in their relationships all at once?

Almost like these things move in waves?

Sometimes these couples are good people with good intentions — people who genuinely care, but simply don’t have the tools or perspectives to navigate conflict or connection.

Those situations are painful, but they’re fixable with the right support.

And other times… when the situation is not “a rough patch.”

It’s a bad relationship.

There are behaviors that make the relationship feel heavy, tense, or unsafe...

And patterns that leave you feeling small, tense, or on edge…

And despite the pain, the fear, and the exhaustion — people stay.

So the real question is:

Why do we stay in relationships that are hurting us? Why do we work so hard to hold onto someone who isn’t good for us? Why does being alone feel scarier than staying?

In this week’s episode of Heal Your Relationships, I break down the three core reasons we stay stuck in toxic or deeply dysfunctional dynamics.

These reasons are not about weakness.

They’re not about failure.

They are about psychology, attachment, and emotional survival.

And once you understand them, you can finally begin to heal your patterns instead of repeating them.

Timestamps:

• 01:35 — A birthday week reflection
• 02:26 — When “good people” struggle in relationships (and why it’s fixable)
• 03:20 — When it’s more than conflict — it’s abuse
• 04:29 — My definition of a toxic relationship
• 05:33 — Why people stay in bad relationships for years
• 06:53 — Reason #1: Anxious attachment
• 11:59 — Reason #2: Trauma bonding
• 15:40 — Reason #3: Fear of abandonment
• 17:57 — How all three lead to low self-esteem
• 19:00 — The stories we tell ourselves to justify staying
• 21:12 — How our programs and events help you heal these patterns

Try one change this week:

If you’re in a relationship that feels painful or stuck, gently ask yourself:

“Which of these three patterns am I living out?”

Not to shame yourself.

Not to force a decision.

But to speak the truth to yourself — the first and most essential step in healing.

This episode is not about telling you to stay or leave.It’s about naming what’s real so you can finally choose your next step from clarity instead of fear.

If this episode gives you even one moment of recognition or self-compassion, it has done its job.

Oh—and if you have something you're navigating and would love my take on it... 

🗣️You can submit a question or situation for a future episode right here (totally anonymous!):

 👉 Submit your question

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