Raising Elite Competitors

3 Strategies For Athletes Who Are Too Hard On Themselves


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I have yet to meet a female athlete that doesn’t struggle with some aspect of perfectionism. 

It’s pretty common, in fact. Athletes want to do well. They want to constantly be improving. They want to hit new levels of performance. 

This is all GREAT and necessary. However, there’s a fine line between healthy striving and the unrealistic expectations that come with perfectionism. 

The Difference Between Perfectionism and “High Standards”

Oftentimes, athletes like to mask their perfectionism behind having “high standards” or goals for themselves.

They think that if they aren’t relentlessly hard on themselves and aiming for perfection, they won’t perform well or improve. 

When, in fact, the opposite happens. The need to be perfect and achieve unrealistic standards actually leaves athletes feeling less confident in their abilities when they fall short. 

We'll break it all down in this episode...

How do we help athletes make this shift from perfectionism to healthy striving?! Three steps...

1. Identify and discard strict or meaningless expectations

This is where I want athletes to physically write out and list all the expectations they have for themselves or that they feel from others (coaches, parents, teammates, crowd, etc) and follow the process that I outline in this episode.

2. Replace expectations with a process-oriented goal

The expectations that are left should be ones that are realistic and meaningful to the athlete. 

From here, we are going to focus on changing them to process-oriented goals. 

Do this for every expectation that is listed. 

3. Remove judgement from performance

Finally, remove judgement from performance. This is key! 

We want to CRITIQUE, not CRITICIZE performance. Athletes need to stick to the facts when evaluating how they performed, rather than judgements.

Bonus Tip!

We become, move towards, and create what we think about most. This can work both FOR and AGAINST our athletes. 

If our athletes are constantly looking to the past and beating themselves up for what they did wrong and never feeling good enough, then that’s the future they will create for themselves!

On the other hand, if our athletes have a vision of who they want to become, visualize it daily, and align their actions to that vision, they will be well on their way to reaching potential and handling setbacks as a way to propel them forward. 

One fun way we tap into this is through creating a vision board! We host a Bonus Vision Board Workshop with each new group in the Elite Competitor Program and the athletes love getting creative and seeing their goals and visions come to life in a way they can see daily. 

Helpful Links:

  •  Visit our podcast website for more on this episode
  • Download the free resources we've created for you
  •  Join us inside our FREE Facebook Group - The Elite Competitor Society - for weekly Q&A, periodic trainings and challenges, and the support of an amazing community of moms, coaches, and the men who partner with us!

The BEST way to help us spread the word and get this information into the hands of millions of parents, coaches, and female athletes is by leaving a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. Thank you in advance for joining us on our mission!

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Raising Elite CompetitorsBy Coach Bre

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