When everyday life is chaotic, difficult, or unfulfilling, affairs can offer an escape from reality. However, the deception of an affair isn't always limited to the lies we tell others — trying to escape reality can also be a way of deceiving ourselves.

According to author Gina Frangello, nothing is really an escape. She understands how, at first, leading a double life can feel exciting and intoxicating. But, while it may initially seem like a neat compartmentalized part of your life, your affair will eventually overlap with your other relationships and challenges. Once this happens, Gina suggests that the best way forward is finding a way to face your fears, accept yourself for who you are, and make the necessary changes to live a happier, healthier life.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy sits down with author Gina Frangello to talk about her new memoir, Blow Your House Down. Together, they discuss why infidelity often overshadows all other aspects of a relationship, the discrimination middle-aged women face in today's society, and how fear can prevent you from putting your well-being first. Plus, Gina explains why it's so important to find a way of accepting yourself for who you are. Stay tuned.