If you aren’t getting what you want out of your relationship, what can you do to make a change? Couples therapy is one option, but it doesn’t always work for every relationship. Fortunately, there are other ways of improving your relationship and satisfying your individual needs.

According to Dr. Marie Murphy, there is no simple, one-size-fits-all solution — and no one but you can tell you what you need. As she says, you’ll have to decide for yourself what’s truly right for you. However, there are techniques that can help you identify your wants and desires and learn the real motives behind them. With this clarity, you can start prioritizing your own needs and gain insight into how you should move forward in your relationship.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy shares her expert strategies for clarifying what you want from a romantic relationship. As she says, knowing your individual needs and desires can help you improve your relationship with your partner and yourself — and positively impact your future relationships, as well. So, grab a pen and a sheet of paper, and get ready to follow Dr. Murphy through her valuable coaching exercises.