A few days ago, I received the devastating news that one of my dearest and closest friends, John Ruhin, author of Gift-ology, had passed away at only 45 years old. John has been a very close friend for over 20 years, a father to 4 young girls (4-13), and a devoted husband. 

If you’ve ever lost someone dear to you, you know how profoundly shattering that moment is. But amidst the heartache, there’s an undeniable truth: while we cannot change the reality of loss, but we can (and must) choose how we respond to it. 

So, for today’s episode, I want to honor my friend and share 3 steps for coping with both your mortality and the inevitable loss of those you love. (In full transparency, I recorded this the day after I found out about John’s passing, so it was still very raw.)

Accepting the reality and inevitability of death—our own and our loved ones—can be one of the hardest but most necessary steps in this process. It’s a truth we often avoid, but facing it head-on allows us to find peace and help others do the same. 

Then, we can live in a way that reflects their values, like the generosity John embodied, and we not only honor their memory but also enrich our own lives and the lives of those around us.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• Death is as natural as birth
• There’s no value in wishing the inevitable were different
• The inevitability of death is certain, but the way we live our lives is our choice
• The suffering we experience often comes from our resistance to accepting reality
• Your beliefs and worldview deeply influence the quality of your life
• The legacy you leave behind and the care you show to your loved ones are enduring acts of love
• It’s better to feel than to suppress painful emotions

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