From redefining “good” and “bad” habits to learning how empathy shapes teaching, Lesley and Brad recap their conversation with yoga teacher Anthony Benenati—founder of City Yoga, California’s first Anusara studio, and now leads That’s Not Yoga®. With over three decades of experience, Anthony has built a philosophy of meeting students where they are. Together they explore how ego, anger, and even curiosity can open the door to practice, and why the stories we carry and the language we use hold the power to shape growth. This episode invites you to pause, reflect, and ask: is this serving me?

If you have any questions about this episode or want to get some of the resources we mentioned, head over to LesleyLogan.co/podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/. If you have any comments or questions about the Be It pod shoot us a message at [email protected] mailto:[email protected].

 

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In this episode you will learn about:

• How Anthony's teaching shaped his philosophy of fitting yoga to the students.
• Brad's early yoga mishaps and how they reframed his view of the practice.
• Feeling like an "outsider" in Pilates and how sharing built deeper connections.
• Why empathy is the real skill teachers need in guiding students.
• Why desire, knowledge, and action are the non-negotiables for growth.

Episode References/Links:

• UK Mullet Tour - https://opc.me/uk
• P.O.T. Chicago 2025 - https://pilates.com/pilates-on-tour-chicagoland
• Cambodia October 2025 Waitlist - https://crowsnestretreats.com
• eLevate Program - https://lesleylogan.co/elevate
• Submit your wins or questions - https://beitpod.com/questions
• Anthony Benenati's Website - https://thatsnotyoga.com
• Guilt vs. Shame by Brene Brown - https://brenebrown.com/articles/2013/01/15/shame-v-guilt
• Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything by BJ Fogg - https://a.co/d/22NIHEI

 

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Resources:

• Watch the Be It Till You See It podcast on YouTube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCq08HES7xLMvVa3Fy5DR8-g
• Lesley Logan website https://lesleylogan.co/
• Be It Till You See It Podcast https://lesleylogan.co/podcast/
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan https://onlinepilatesclasses.com/
• Online Pilates Classes by Lesley Logan on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjogqXLnfyhS5VlU4rdzlnQ
• Profitable Pilates https://profitablepilates.com/about/

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• The OPC YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@OnlinePilatesClasses

 

Episode Transcript:

Lesley Logan 0:00  

There's a difference between saying something is bad and to lead to I'm bad, and asking yourself, is it serving me? If the answer is yes, fuck what people think. If it's a yes, and tomorrow it's a yes, and then the next week it's a yes, and then next month it's a no, then you make a change. 

Lesley Logan 0:22  

Welcome to the Be It Till You See It podcast where we talk about taking messy action, knowing that perfect is boring. I'm Lesley Logan, Pilates instructor and fitness business coach. I've trained thousands of people around the world and the number one thing I see stopping people from achieving anything is self-doubt. My friends, action brings clarity and it's the antidote to fear. Each week, my guest will bring bold, executable, intrinsic and targeted steps that you can use to put yourself first and Be It Till You See It. It's a practice, not a perfect. Let's get started.

Lesley Logan 1:05  

Welcome back to the Be It Till You See It interview recap where my co-host in life, Brad, and I are going to dig into the authentic convo I had with Anthony Benenati in our last episode. If you haven't yet listened to that one, you've missed out. 

Brad Crowell 1:16  

You definitely missed out. 

Lesley Logan 1:18  

I don't like to go around saying you made mistakes, but you did.

Brad Crowell 1:20  

You did. 

Lesley Logan 1:24  

You don't suck or anything, but, all right, before I get into that, today is August 28th 2025 and it is National Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day. And on this day, of course, it's gonna say Rainbow Bridge twice. So the death of a beloved pet, whether it's the family dog, a furry kitty, or something a little more obscure, is a sad occasion. Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day on August 28th is the day that we remember the pets that are no longer with us. Whilst the pain of losing a pet, you can't laugh while we're talking about dead dogs, babe, but we are laughing because Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day is a day we remember our pets. We got that from remembrance, you know, like we got it, okay, anyways. Whilst the pain of losing a pet somewhat heals over time, they're never forgotten, and today is their day. The day was founded by author Deborah Barnes as a way for people to share their memories of the pets that they have lost, whether it's a dog, a hamster or a snake, or, you know, anything in between. Oh, maybe this is the day that we maybe actually like say it. 

Brad Crowell 2:32  

That's what I was thinking. 

Lesley Logan 2:34  

Okay, well, do you want to say it?

Brad Crowell 2:36  

Yeah, I do. Also, I think it's great that it's in the month of August. 

Lesley Logan 2:40  

I know it's like we knew. 

Brad Crowell 2:42  

If you didn't know, Lesley and I have only one dog now, and it's been a couple of months that we lost August as well. And when I say as well, what I mean is last year, we lost Gaia towards the end of the year, and then about six months later, we also lost August, and that was really, really challenging, and not something that we talk about very often.

Lesley Logan 3:08  

I know well, because there's a difference, and I think that's what was important about this day. And like, if you needed this day, it's like, there's something it was something easier. I mean, it felt really hard at the time when we had to, like, make a day to say goodbye to Gaia, you know, like we, we knew for years the day was coming, and we could see it was time. And we had a different situation with August, where it was just like, oh. 

Brad Crowell 3:33  

It was unexpected. It was sudden. 

Lesley Logan 3:35  

This is happening to this is happening today, and that's, that, like, that's just not enough time for your brain to like, not that we miss him differently, but we, I do, like, it's just a different grief. It felt like a different grief. 

Brad Crowell 3:48  

It felt like a different grief. I felt like with Gaia, I had a lot more opportunity to say goodbye ahead of time, you know. And then when when it was gone, it was fond memories. With August, it felt like shock and sadness.

Lesley Logan 4:11  

Yeah, yeah. I mean, with and with her, like, I felt like, okay, she's gonna be better. Because, like, she was just having a hard time being alive. And he was so young, so that just felt like it was it was hard, it was awful. We didn't talk about it, because there's when you when you share, that someone passes away, or a pet passes away, there's an outpouring of love because of this world we live in. Like, you can say what you want about the negative sides of social media. But the positive sides are like, insane. It's like, it's like the people from your life 10 years ago, and because people have had pets like, they feel it. When you lose a pet and you see someone like you feel that loss with them. Because you know what it feels like and like, in no way were we capable of handling any I'm sorry, like I couldn't and, like, even now we're getting teary eyed. So anyways, we have one amazing dog, and we, if you know this about OPC, well, all of our companies do a little donation to a charity. It's built into all of our products and our profit margins and OPC, this year, I chose a dog charity down because they get like, 500 animals, like, a week, and like, they're trying really hard to be a no kill shelter, and I, and we can't I, like, literally, look at dogs Brad, like, look at this one. Like, we're gonna, like, we're gonna take this on. And as much as, like, oh, that fills this hole. Then I'm, like, it doesn't fill the hole. So, like, anyways, National Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day to for from our hearts to all of yours who've lost a pet, it's so hard. So anyways, okay, so in other news. 

Brad Crowell 5:51  

In other news.

Lesley Logan 5:52  

We are back from our tour, as you heard last time, but we are literally leaving in like four days to go to the U.K., and we opened up ala carte workshops, which means that if you can't take a whole day off with us, it's quite possible there is a spot left in a workshop. So we just took the day passes and allowed people to buy a workshop. So there might be one or two workshops that you can snag your spot. And so go to opc.me/uk because we're going to be in Essex and Leeds, and I don't know when we'll be back teaching in the U.K., but I know we're gonna be there now, and it's gonna be so much fun. There's some great workshops. There's some business ones, there's some Pilates ones. They're for people who like us and love us and just wanna learn with us who are really, absolutely amazing. So thank you to our hosts from The Movement Base and Chapel Allerton Pilates. Then we come back and like, two weeks later, we leave for Chicagoland. We're going to be at a Balanced Body's POT and I'm teaching the Joe's gyms there. Brad is going to have, like, Brad just now was helping me with the booth, and that's it's in Burr Ridge, but they call it Chicagoland, and I like that. And from Chicagoland, we're going to go to Cambodia. And you know what? We've had people last minute join us, like we said, you could join like, two weeks before. So, crowsnestretreats.com, if you are feeling ambitious and wanting to get the heck out of town because there's a lot going on and maybe you just want to take a break. So, crowsnestretreats.com. And then what? 

Brad Crowell 7:16  

Well, we're actually working on lighting up a workshop and some classes in Singapore right now. 

Lesley Logan 7:21  

I know. 

Brad Crowell 7:22  

Which would be awesome. We'll see. You know, I would say at this point, if it hasn't come together, then we have a problem. If you're listening to this now, but right now we're working on it when we're recording this. So we're gonna say, yeah, it happened. It definitely happened. We got a workshop coming in Singapore.

Lesley Logan 7:39  

It's going to happen because, hello. I mean, it's not very often Singapore that I have a layover during daylight hours. 

Brad Crowell 7:44  

That's right. 

Lesley Logan 7:44  

And so we're gonna make there's people who want it.

Brad Crowell 7:46  

It's gonna be awesome, yeah. But anyway, we've been looking at different venues right now, and we're lining it all up. So yeah. And then after we get back from Singapore, we actually are home for about a month, which is quite nice to to chill out. We some family coming into town, and then we go on our winter tour for OPC, where we're driving another 8000 miles this year. Last year, we did 8200 over the winter. This year is going to be less miles more stops. Oh, yeah. 

Lesley Logan 8:20  

Okay. 

Brad Crowell 8:21  

Less miles, more steps, but it's gonna be awesome. We are stoked. 

Lesley Logan 8:24  

You know what's really funny, guys? Okay, so the team, like, I see the map, I see where we're going, I give some inputs on some places. I'm like, yeah, I'll do that, whatever. But then they don't actually always tell me, like, all the events we're doing. So like, this week, all the private events that, because, like, studios that host us can also, like, hire us for an event, just for their team, right? So there's a public class and a public workshop, and then sometimes there's a private workshop. And apparently there's a lot more than workshops that I thought on the summer tour. So I am interested to see this winter tour. I expect lots of gifts and lots of hugs, but we'll announce the winter tour in October. So if you are in Cambodia with us, you'll hear it all announced. 

Brad Crowell 9:03  

Yes, you will. 

Lesley Logan 9:04  

Okay before we get into Anthony's incredible episode. What is the question of the week?

Brad Crowell 9:10  

Yes, great. So I don't actually know how to say this, netamenashe, yeah, netamenashe. there you go, on Instagram, she asked, Hey Lesley, do you do any Zoom sessions sometimes? 

Lesley Logan 9:27  

Sometimes I do. 

Brad Crowell 9:28  

Sometimes.

Lesley Logan 9:29  

That's true. Yeah. Who gets them? It's gonna sound like I'm an asshole, but the people who get Zoom sessions with me are people who are in my mentorship program, to be completely honest. I don't have a lot of hours in a week that I can teach because of we run OPC, you run Profitable Pilates, you know, and we do have the mentorship program, so the limited times that I have are for those in that program. And then sometimes OPC members get access to that calendar. But basically, as you can hear, no one publicly gets access to those things. So as much as I love to teach the world on Zoom, that the way I can do that is through OPC actually, because we have a monthly live class, and I can look, we can hang out afterwards, and I can look at your form. I can answer your questions. You don't even have to come to the live class when I look at your form, you can submit videos, and I can give you feedback. So if you're wanting me to give you feedback on some exercises, be an OPC member. If you're a teacher, you can go through eLevate we only have a few spots there, where OPC, it's obviously as many people. 

Brad Crowell 10:28  

Open to the world. 

Lesley Logan 10:28  

Open to the world and. 

Lesley Logan 10:29  

But yeah, I mean, with eLevate, if you, if you're actually looking for a specific feedback on your practice and you want to really grow, Neta, you should be considering eLevate. It's for teachers. It's a nine-month program. It's like, consider it like going and getting a master's degree somewhere. It's very in depth, in in in what it covers. It's going to run through everything that Lesley learned from Jay Grimes, who studied with Joe. So you're going to be covering 500 exercises. It's going to be amazing. During that time, your your personal practice will significantly grow, and you'll also have, Lesley will be, you know, watching your practice during those nine months, too. So that's like, the best way to make that happen. Just reach out, or go to lesleylogan.co/elevate and or you can book a call. I'm super happy to hop on a call and just say, what's up, you know.

Lesley Logan 11:21  

I mean, I it's like a it's a great problem to have. And I actually used to teach this long I've been teaching online. I used to teach on Skype, and I used to teach people all over on Skype. 

Brad Crowell 11:30  

2015, '16, '17 Skype.

Lesley Logan 11:33  

Yeah, Skype, oh, my God. Or sometimes Facebook, sometimes Facebook Messenger, because Skype wasn't working, or whatever, like, it was so, but I was, like, anything that has a video I can teach on it. And, you know, but, yeah, I think, like, we do have some great opportunities to work together in person between the tours and Cambodia, and then the online stuff is, you know, you I all love. 

Brad Crowell 11:56  

That's another great one. You could come with us to Cambodia, Neta, where you'll be doing five classes with Lesley during the retreat. And obviously, you know, it's, it's not a large group. So you can come there and be in person. 

Lesley Logan 12:10  

Yeah. So you guys send in your questions. You can, like, you'll literally hear honest feedback and answers. And we love answering them. Like, I just, I want, I want, I want I want questions about your wedding, I don't know. Like, give me some good ones. Go to beitpod.com/questions to submit them, or text us at 310-905-5534, it doesn't yet mean Be It Pod, but we're getting to.

Brad Crowell 12:34  

No it's not gonna mean Be It Pod anytime soon. So I love that your wishful thinking here it's, you know, low on the list.

Lesley Logan 12:41  

Being it till I see it. 

Brad Crowell 12:43  

Lower on the priority list. 

Lesley Logan 12:47  

All right, all right. 

Brad Crowell 12:49  

Love you. 

Lesley Logan 12:49  

Love you too.

Brad Crowell 12:51  

Stick around. We'll be right back. We're gonna dig into one of my really dear friends who I've now known for more than a decade, and he he's just inspirational in multiple ways, being a yogi, but also, you know, he's a philosopher too. So cannot wait to dig into this convbo that you have with Anthony Benenati. You're really going to enjoy. If you haven't already gone back and listened to that, you should, but yeah, looking forward to it. Stick around we'll be right back. 

Brad Crowell 13:19  

Right. Let's talk about Mr. Anthony Benenati. A professional yoga teacher with over 32 years of experience. Before stepping into yoga, Anthony served in the Air Force and worked in a comp as a competitive power lifter. I don't know if he worked at it, but he was a competitive power lifter, which left him with shoulder and knee injuries. In fact, you know, he he told me when he was younger, he couldn't even touch his toes, you know, and today he's like, you know, obviously been doing yoga for three decades. He founded City Yoga, which was California's first on a Sora studio, and he now leads, That's Not Yoga. That's his website, thatsnotyoga.com. He he's actually also done a lot of business stuff, and like because he sold studios and then he taught for other people, and he's done workshops and holds retreats, all sorts of stuff. Anthony's philosophy is to fit yoga to the student, making sure the practice leads to transformation and healing, not to suffering. And he teaches students to listen to their bodies every day, meeting themselves where they're at, with their openness and compassion, and yeah I think that is a really great summary of, you know, who he is. But I would also say he rides a motorcycle, he drinks beer, he curses. He's fucking cool and hip, and that's one of the things that that I connected with him the most about is because I had this preconception of what's a yogi. 

Lesley Logan 14:45  

I mean, your first class was, like a per tip, like a bit like, like the typical yoga instructor, like this little, soft spoken older lady.

Brad Crowell 14:52  

No, no, no, no, no. I had my well, so that, so that was the first teacher that I actually learned from, and she was super sweet and nice. But yes, the class was literally for, like, elderly people. And I was like, teach me the foundations. And I liked the class because she let her students ask questions during class. And I was like, I don't understand this pose. How does it work? And it effectively was like. 

Lesley Logan 15:14  

In case you haven't noticed, Brad, you guys, Brad literally interrupts all classes to ask questions. Like, like, all classes, he has questions. He comes on the retreat, and he'll just pop into a class, and then he's got a question. It's like, we actually talked about that yesterday, and you missed class. But okay.

Brad Crowell 15:29  

So, but my very first class was hilarious, because I'm like, you know, my nickname in yoga class was shark boy, or Mr. Bendy, and I, I've just been I'm a hyper mobile body, so naturally flexible. And I get to my first yoga class ever was a Groupon that I bought, and I showed up for class, and I'm in the middle of, like, 30 or 40 people, and I don't have a clue what I'm doing. I'm watching this guy up in the front, you know, do all the things. And I was like, okay, we're sticking our arm over there. We're shooting, our leg over this way. We're twisting and blah, blah, blah. And at the end of the class, he came up to me, he's like, wow, man, you have a great practice. And I was like, this is my very first class. And it was like, what? And I was like, yeah. And then I left the studio, and I walked out to my motorcycle, and I could not get onto it. 

Lesley Logan 16:16  

You did way too much. 

Brad Crowell 16:17  

Because I hurt myself so bad that I literally had to sit there for like an hour just for my back to not be screaming at me. And I was like, well, yoga is not for me. And I just was like, I'm done. And then I never, you know, like, I never went back, and I, but I, but I had that Groupon right? And so anyway, somehow I ended up using it. And I bought another package somewhere with Anthony, because the studio was convenient and but I only want. 

Lesley Logan 16:46  

Your first class wasn't with Anthony. 

Brad Crowell 16:47  

No, no, my first class was not with Anthony. But like, a year or two later, I was like, I'm gonna give this another try. And I did buy, like, a 10 pack at Anthony's studio, and I use, like, and he didn't have an expiration on it, right? So, and I, but I only use, like, two classes. And then I didn't know yoga for like, years. And then there was a point where I was like, I need to go. I need to go back to class. And I, I called the studio. Had, he had sold it and, you know, so I, I went. I was like, hey, I had this package with the old studio, you know, you know. And I wasn't even taking with Anthony. I had been taking with that lady, that older lady, lady, but I still had packages. It just so happened to be Anthony's studio. I didn't know that, yeah. So when I went back, Anthony was the teacher, and that's how I first met him. And I was like, who the hell is this guy? He's awesome. This is rad and that and then I was like, hooked. I was in. This is probably like, 2014. So I've been dabbling in yoga for like, maybe three years, but not really.

Lesley Logan 17:46  

I love how two or three times in two years is dabbling.

Brad Crowell 17:50  

Yeah. Well, with the with the older with the with the older lady, whose name I don't remember, and I feel bad about that. I probably went, you know, I bought a few 10 packs, you know, I went a few times.

Lesley Logan 18:00  

Okay, it wasn't clear that there's a multiple 10 pack. 

Brad Crowell 18:02  

Yeah. Sorry, sorry I went a few times, like, I had enough foundation (inaudible). 

Lesley Logan 18:05  

Every time I've heard this story it has always had, like, one 10 pack, and it's like, you get a couple of times it's not dabbling.

Brad Crowell 18:12  

Oh, I went, I went, yeah, I went enough to, like, decide that yoga wasn't gonna hurt me if I knew what I was doing. But, you know, I didn't actually, like, it didn't turn it into a habit or a practice. I just went a few times, and then, you know, it wasn't until, you know, a year later that I went back to redeem the rest of my package that, studio had sold. I didn't even know it. And I was like, well, they're gonna honor it. I already have classes. I'll just go there. And then I happened to pop into a class that was Anthony's, but, wow, that was a long story that has nothing to do with anything. 

Lesley Logan 18:45  

Speaking of Anthony. 

Brad Crowell 18:45  

Yeah, let's shift on, like from your convo, which was deep. 

Lesley Logan 18:50  

It was deep. I knew it would be, I know it'd be so good, but I think for all the teachers, no matter what you teach, this is a really great thing. Anthony says he believes that the most effective teacher is someone who understands how people get to the practice. 

Brad Crowell 19:03  

Well, you just found out. 

Lesley Logan 19:05  

Yeah, well, but like, right, right, but like, I think this goes to, you know, we coach a lot of Pilates instructors, and they're like, I want to work with an advanced person. All they want to do is lose weight, and it's like, right? And we don't want you to lie to people, but you have to understand what gets people to the practice, so that you can have empathy for them being a beginner, because they should be allowed to be a beginner, and we can't, we don't want them to feel shame for what they think they want in their life, because that's a compilation of years of stories and influence good or bad to, and in the conversation we talked about, there's no such thing as good or bad, but like to to someone. And so how can you really have a lived experience, so that you can in whatever it is you're teaching, so that you can come from a really great place, an honest place, and and be human, you know, like, I think a lot of instructors put themselves upon pedestals, cult leaders and and forget that like you are also in practice when you teach something, that's a practice, right? And so he also said empathy is such an important factor to be a great teacher, you have to put yourself in their shoes. And this is something like, look, of course, I have days where I get tired and I'm like, why don't they just fucking relax and stop trying to be perfect, like I don't understand, like, I'm fucking just, just relax, just be in practice. But also, I know what that is like. I know why they can't do it. I know that they have years of like, being for whatever, like somebody told them that it had maybe the perfection is because it kept the house safe. You know, there's so many different reasons why people seek perfection. They want certainty. They want control, you know.

Brad Crowell 20:47  

Yeah, I mean, it could be a response from uncertainty in another area of their life, where they feel like this is where I can have certainty, because I know exactly how it's supposed to be, you know. And then, and then it becomes this thing. 

Lesley Logan 21:00  

Yeah, but when I when I like, so when I catch myself, because sometimes, like, I'm like, and it's like, oh, wait, hold on a second. We've like, I've been here. So what, what was I going through? And what actually got me to, like, let go of that and get back in that empathy, because it actually is what helps guide people on the path to being more themselves, to connecting to themselves, to having a personal practice. So it was just like.

Brad Crowell 21:25  

Yeah. Anthony was talking about his ego was the thing that brought him to the practice. Because he was like. 

Lesley Logan 21:31  

Which would just be the irony of yoga. 

Brad Crowell 21:33  

Yeah. And I'll tell you, it was actually anger that brought me to the practice and. 

Lesley Logan 21:39  

I do went to yoga with you because I thought you're cute. I mean I was going to yoga already, and I was like, Ookay, I'll go to that class with him, because he's cute.

Brad Crowell 21:48  

bBut, but I was angry that I couldn't do it, and that was also ego. But like, I was angry. I was angry outside. I was angry at my ex, right? And I was angry that I couldn't figure it out. And I was angry that my I was just angry. And then when I when I knew was that, after I had beat the shit out of myself in a yoga class, I felt better. Like, ironically, you know, and like, if you know, talk about controlling, like I wanted every single answer to every every possible understanding of the movement, you know, and then, and then there was stuff that I was like, couldn't do. And it generally like, ironically, I was flexible, but I wasn't flexible enough in my own mind. And I definitely wasn't strong. And, you know, I think that anger, like, pushed me through the strength training barriers of where I was, like, I need to be able to hold this pose for whatever, 10 seconds, I don't know, like, whatever it was like. And it was like, I mean, I'm glad I didn't hurt myself, to be honest, you know, during it. But it was, you know, it took me a solid six months to enjoy the practice, you know, because I was just frustrated at everything.

Lesley Logan 23:04  

Yeah, I think, like, had you come to it for a different way, you might, like, it would might have been a different thing, but maybe you didn't, wouldn't have practiced that hard. Like, I think, I think that's what the point is. Like, what if we allowed our journey to whatever it is just be that, I think a lot of people want to change the past. They want, they want it to be a different way that they got into something. I remember, like, how I got into Pilates. I thought it was BS, and I remember not telling anyone that story for years, like I was so embarrassed that I actually thought that that Pilates was a gimmick, you know, I really was. I was like, oh. And then also on top of that, because when I became a Pilates instructor, people, most of the teachers were dancers. So here I was one of the few in my world, not in the world, but in my world, L.A., that was a non-dancer, and I thought it was bullshit, you know, like I was just like, I'm just gonna just, I'm just gonna bend back, I'm in the back, and no one's gonna know. But then I realized, like, actually, like, how I got to Pilates is probably how a lot of people think about Pilates. And what if I actually just, like, lean into the empathy of that, and it might actually allow more people to come to the practice, because then they don't feel stupid or silly or weird for thinking it's, it's, you know, not gonna work, you know? And it found, the more I talked about how I wasn't a dancer, the more teachers were like, I'm not one either. And then made them feel good. And so, like, what if we all just own the story that we have? It might actually make us all have more community and connection to different people.

Brad Crowell 24:33  

Yeah. I mean, it makes you relatable, you know, makes makes as a teacher, it makes you relatable when you're willing to, you know, share the things that it's I think, you know, there's always over-sharing can be wrong. But like, I think it's hard to know what will be received well. And so I feel like that there's fear there, and that's why you know, you're like, man, I shouldn't share that. But then, like, when you know if and when you do, it's like, oh, you know, like, well, I'm not alone in this, and other people are probably also not sharing, and now they feel permission to, you know, commiserate or connect, or, you know, makes them feel better about themselves, too. So, yeah. 

Lesley Logan 25:12  

Yeah. Love it. Okay, what did you love? 

Brad Crowell 25:13  

Yeah, so I loved this idea of good and bad. You know, he said yoga doesn't actually see things as good and bad. It's not like you have a good practice or a bad practice, or you're a good yogi or a bad yogi, you know. He said that yoga kind of sees things more in the does it work, or is it not working? You know? And he was talking about the specifically, like, when, when we were talking about this, it was more talking about habits. You know, it's like, the habit is there, whether it's a quote, unquote, good habit or a bad habit. You know, we're taking that and setting that aside instead. It's a, you know, how is this habit serving me? Is it, is it working for me, or is it not working for me, right? And specifically you were like, maybe you get frustrated that you sit there and scroll on Instagram all day long, but maybe you can see that as a good thing, because you actually need a moment to to just like, not think, right?

Lesley Logan 26:12  

Yeah, yeah. We also mean, we talked about, like, some people would say it's bad to drink, but like, if it if, if that drink made you that drink made you relax and connect with your family. Like, is it bad and and I think, like, is it wrong? So I've heard that this before, and a couple different things, obviously, like, there are things that cannot be great for you, but you, the difference is, like, is it serving you? Is it serving you? And it's okay for something to serve you and not serve somebody else. 

Brad Crowell 26:43  

Or what is coming from it that could be serving you, right? Like, it might not be the thing that is serving you like, like the alcohol itself might not be beneficial, but the quality time that you spent with family when consuming the alcohol that is worth doing, right, you know? So, there's, I still, I still love the idea that like everything in moderation, including moderation, you know.

Lesley Logan 27:08  

Well, I think the point is, because I think about Brene Brown, she's gone in my head a couple times in this conversation, guilt versus shame is her thing, right? Like, I think some people shame themselves. I had a drink last night, versus, like, I spent time with my family and I had a drink, and I love spending time with my family. I don't love I had the drink, but when I had the drink, it let me forget about the work that I had so I could spend time with my family. So I do need to figure out a way to get to forget about work so I can spend time my family. But we don't have to have shame around the drink, because, you know, and I think that's where it's like, we have to be kinder to ourselves. I think people just walk around. I mean, it's on the internet, right? People just shame people all the time. That's bad. That's wrong. You did that wrong. Like, no one is going way to go, like, you know, when's the last time you told a stranger (inaudible). 

Brad Crowell 28:00  

We definitely celebrated with OPC. I was gonna, I was gonna circle this right back around to your Pilates practice or your yoga practice, because when I first got into yoga, that was how I treated myself. I'm not good enough. I'm doing it wrong. I'm not doing it well. It's, it's not good, like I'm not a good yogi. And I was judging myself, but I was angry. I was angry at myself. I was angry at the world, you know, and like, you know, but I knew that, like physically, my body, like you ever felt like, you ever felt like so frustrated you just have to go run? You ever felt like that, where like running is somehow going to like be the thing, I and, like, that was that was like, you know, because you get that endorphins release and all that stuff, and that was what I was looking for without really understanding it, I just knew that I felt better after class, you know, and because I was also more relaxed and, like, my mind wasn't like, freaking out all the time, you know, at that point. But it still took time for me to like, took years for me to stop judging my own practice and like the idea that.

Lesley Logan 29:14  

But I think going back to like, there's a difference between saying something is bad and to lead to I'm bad, and asking yourself, and if we could just catch ourselves now, because this is why I love this conversation. Is it serving me? If the answer is yes, fuck what people think. If it's a yes, and tomorrow it's a yes, and then the next week, it's a yes, and then next month, it's a no. Then you make a change, but. 

Brad Crowell 29:44  

Sure, you can make a choice. 

Lesley Logan 29:45  

But I think some people are using judgment on good or bad, on things that are serving them, and then they're fucking stuck, like if you had not gone to yoga because I'm bad. It makes me feel like, you know, so I'm not, like, yoga would become the thing that's wrong. And then, like, you know what I mean? So like, is it serving me? It's serving me to go because I'm angry, and I can be angry, and it's serving me, and then all of a sudden, the anger at yoga no longer served you, and you let it go. So I think, like, there's a couple different ways to see this. 

Brad Crowell 30:20  

Or the anger at me is no longer serving me. 

Lesley Logan 30:22  

Yeah, so you had to let it go. So I think, what if we could all stop? If you and this is something we can catch ourselves doing here at this household, you and me together, but also, like our coworkers, your friends, like, if you go, oh, I know it's bad that I do this, hit, pull, that rubber band. Is it serving me, that I do this, right? Is it serving me that I do this? And if you can honestly say yes, then let the fucking guilt go, because it's not helping you. 

Brad Crowell 30:48  

You said pull that rubber band? 

Lesley Logan 30:50  

You know, you have a rubber band on your wrist. 

Brad Crowell 30:52  

Yeah, yeah. Snap it. 

Lesley Logan 30:53  

Snap it. 

Brad Crowell 30:54  

Like, hit the reset button. Yeah, you know. And, and it's, you know, that he took it a little bit differently in the conversation, because he's, you know, he was talking about all things serve a purpose, even if we look at it and say that's bad, you know? Because, you know, he said we wouldn't know love without hate, joy without pain. 

Lesley Logan 31:18  

I can think of a few people that I could still think the world's a better place if they weren't in it. I'm just gonna say, we all know, but like, I get the point.

Brad Crowell 31:27  

Perspective, right? It allows us to actually understand what we have in our world that is amazing, you know, because we can also see, oh, damn, I definitely that is not amazing over there. You know? You know that that's not giving that's not that is not working. That would not work for me, right? I mean, yeah, that wouldn't work for me. So, you know, it's a, he said, it's a balance, you know, and it's and each scenario you find yourself in, you can find that balance between, you know, is it working for me or not working for me? Or is it the good and the bad? You know, how can it be working for you? 

Lesley Logan 32:04  

I mean, you know, I love it because, like BJ Fogg always said, there's no such thing as bad habit. Every habit you have is serving some function. Now, there might be habits you don't like or are no longer serving you, but they're a habit. But there, you cannot say there's a bad habit, because it is providing something in your brain that's kicking off a dopamine otherwise your brain wouldn't seek doing it.

Brad Crowell 32:24  

Right. Yeah, yeah. I always thought about that too with, like, food, you know, there's something, even if it's like, quote, unquote, bad habit of, like, eating all the time, or, like, maybe you have, like, a consistent, like, I eat late, or whatever, and you know that it's like, not physically helping you. There's still something in your head that's like, I need that thing, whatever that thing is, you know, I need that glass of orange juice, you know, I need the sugar, you know. 

Lesley Logan 32:49  

Well, because it could be, it brings re lief, right? It's distraction, it might calm you down. There's so many different things that our habits do. So if there's something that you feel no longer serves a purpose in your life, right, you have to explore that and not judge that. I'm going to do a whole series on habits, actually, so we can continue this conversation on this like it's now an eight episode series I'm going to do about habits. 

Brad Crowell 33:19  

Really? 

Lesley Logan 33:19  

Oh, Brad has no idea. 

Brad Crowell 33:20  

What? Tell me more. 

Lesley Logan 33:22  

Yeah, oh, my God, I'm doing a whole episode, a whole series on my. 

Brad Crowell 33:25  

On where? 

Lesley Logan 33:26  

On the pod. I'm just taking over and not interviewing people for a few weeks. And I'm gonna tell you how to fucking do a habit. And we're also talking about unraveling habits that no longer serve you. 

Brad Crowell 33:35  

All right, you heard it here first, y'all, surprise. 

Lesley Logan 33:37  

So the thing the homework from this episode is just start taking notice of things, you know, the habits you have, the routines you have that no longer serve you. And we can bring that to the series, which will come out, I think it's going to come out either in December or January, so.

Brad Crowell 33:55  

Cool. All right, that's really fun. We'll stick around. We'll be right back. We're going to dig into those Be It Action Items that you covered with Anthony, which were also fantastic. So yeah, stick around we'll be right back. 

Brad Crowell 34:07  

Welcome back. Let's dig into those Be It Action Items that you had.

Lesley Logan 34:13  

You guys, I am notorious, like, I'm notorious, like, yeah, I'm ready. And then I just looked down, and he's like, just wants me to look at the camera when he says welcome back. So I'm sorry, everyone here we are. Welcome back. 

Brad Crowell 34:24  

Welcome back. 

Lesley Logan 34:24  

Say it with him. What bold, ex, you're not gonna say it with me? What bold, executable, intrinsic or targeted

Brad Crowell 34:31  

Action items can we take away from your convo with Anthony Benenati?

Lesley Logan 34:35  

Just so you know, I always fade out, even when you sing Happy Birthday, because I can't. I don't like how I sound. Okay. I'm going first, babe, here we go. I'm taking away because I there's just too many things I loved. So he said, he states that it's important that we actually we focus on three things when you want to do things that you want to do. So first of all, to do anything you want to do, you have to actually have the desire to do it. If you don't have the desire to do it, you won't put the effort forward. Has anyone ever said like, oh, I'm gonna I'm gonna learn Spanish, and then you don't learn Spanish. So you have to have the desire to do it. This is, we're gonna talk about this in the Habit Series. I love it. Knowledge. You have to learn to do it. He actually said just doing something without knowing how to do it can cause you harm. This is very true. You have to actually learn how to do it. I'm actually trying to learn how to do tarot, because I like want to, we have a Ttarot episode coming out, and I like, want to understand how to like, do it better. And I want a tarot is a personal relationship with yourself. It's asking yourself questions. And I want to have, I don't want to do it wrong. I want to have a really good understanding of it before I start journaling and pulling cards. And really like doing it for real. And then third is action. Then you simply have to do it. But beyond doing it just once, you must commit to doing over and over and over again to create meaningful change. And I love this so much. We have to be okay with being beginners, are we okay for having, like, being on a journey of learning, and then you just keep doing it. And it's really amazing how when you do that, it's like there's deeper levels of everything that we do, and it's just so good. I am loving, I love this, love, I love this triad. Okay, Brad.

Brad Crowell 36:12  

Yeah, I think that that idea of desire, knowledge and action is so obvious, but we often will skip one of the steps. 

Lesley Logan 36:24  

Sometimes people skip desire. 

Brad Crowell 36:26  

That's what I'm saying. 

Lesley Logan 36:27  

It's terrible, like, that's a bad one. 

Brad Crowell 36:28  

I'm doing it because I have to, or I'm doing it for somebody else, but really, you don't fucking want to, and so it actually sets you up to fail from the gate, right? Because what's gonna happen, you're gonna you're gonna do it, and it's gonna build frustration or resentment, you know, or like you mentioned with step two, if you skip knowledge, you could hurt yourself. And then, you know, there's step three, which is actually being consistent with it. You can have the desire to learn. You could even learn how to do it. But then if you don't do it.

Lesley Logan 37:03  

Right, right, because you, because some people won't do things because they're they're too new at it, you know. Okay, your Be It Action Items, your takeaways.

Brad Crowell 37:11  

Okay, so he was talking about being careful with language, and you mentioned this too, right? How your body actually learns, your body responds to the way that you think and the things that you say impact, you know, like, what you think is what you're going to say, and what you think your body is also going to do. 

Lesley Logan 37:32  

Your body's not going to go rogue on you.

Brad Crowell 37:34  

Right. So, for example, you were talking about, you know, oh, I'm never, I never lose weight, or I'm never gonna get stronger or, you know, or I was thinking about just this, just the other day, I had somebody come, you know, we had somebody come to our place, and we were just taking photos, and the person said, oh, no, no, no, no, no, that's my bad side. And then shifted to the other side of the photo so they could get it. And I was like, that's like, I mean, of course, we've all heard that and like, it sounds like so Hollywood, but it's also, you know, like, that's a shame.

Lesley Logan 38:13  

Well, also, because you it just you have confirmation bias. You actually always see the thing that you're saying is bad, but your body listens. If you say you have a weak arm, your body's not gonna go let me show you how strong I am. No, it's just not gonna happen, and you'll treat it that way. So I really, I really think language, being careful with it, is something we could all pay attention to.

Brad Crowell 38:34  

Yeah and then the other side of it, too is let's say you have the desire and the action, the knowledge, I mean, and you're putting it into action, the way that you put it into action today might be different than the way you put it into action yesterday, right? And I think I had, especially with my yoga practice, never fully embraced this idea, ever. So for 10 years, I was like, I can always go further than I did the day before. That's just the way I always looked at it. It wasn't until I started lifting weights that I truly looked at it like, I just can't today, whatever, whatever, like, like, if last week I did 150 pounds, I just feel like, wimpy today, I'm not going to be able to do it and I and I could actually hurt myself.

Lesley Logan 39:28  

Yeah, that's why my trainer has me on a deload week because it's important for your central nervous system to, like, think things are a little easier. Can't always be building, building, building. You have to calm it down, yeah, so it's, it's so true, like our the way we approach things has to be different if we're listening to our body. 

Brad Crowell 39:47  

Yeah and, you know, so yeah, listening to your body, being careful with your language, being willing to, being willing to, not, you know, whatever, reach the goal or hit the to be the epitome of the pose or, you know, in our in my case, it was often handstand, you know, when it was yoga, or for lifters, it's like, I gotta hit my max. Last max was, you know, this, so I gotta hit, I gotta at least hit that and then more, right, like, being willing to be like, okay, maybe right now it's okay if it's different, you know.

Lesley Logan 40:24  

Yeah, it's interesting how, like, some of those things, just you'd learn with age, but also.

Brad Crowell 40:27  

I think with age and also, like death. I never felt like I was gonna hurt myself in yoga. I never felt like I could crush my skull. Like, if you're benching and you have too much weight, your body could slip and fail, and you could have 150 pounds crashing on your body like, that was, that was the moment where I was like, oh, okay. 

Lesley Logan 40:47  

So there it is, Anthony. We should have just probably go how to teach Brad he could have died, get a fucking broken his neck. Oh, my God. Okay, now we know. Well, I.

Brad Crowell 40:59  

But also that's translated, you know, like, I it took me an opportunity to learn, and then, you know, now, when I'm going back into my yoga practice, it's, doesn't have to be like, to the nth degree every single time.

Lesley Logan 41:12  

Yeah, I just show up. Like, that's where I'm at. I'm like, I'm really enjoying just showing up. So glad I get to do that. I'm like, I'm here today.

Brad Crowell 41:20  

I also feel a lot stronger, too, and less flexible. And I acknowledge that. 

Lesley Logan 41:25  

You're no longer a shark boy. 

Brad Crowell 41:26  

No. I mean, I don't think so. I'm still flexible, but I'm not like I was like before. 

Lesley Logan 41:31  

You have mobility. 

Brad Crowell 41:32  

Yeah, but I could put my foot behind my neck not in front of my head.

Lesley Logan 41:35  

I know, but you have but we need strength as we get older, it's really fucking hard to put it on. Anyways, I just this whole episode has so many gems I really enjoyed, like, reliving it. I think it's one that's worth going back to. And I think it's got, it's got a takeaway you might listen to differently each time you hear it. So, listen to it again. And I'm Lesley Logan. 

Brad Crowell 41:57  

And I'm Brad Crowell. 

Lesley Logan 41:58  

Thanks for listening. I want to hear reviews. I want to hear takeaways. I want your fucking questions. Send it in to beitpod.com/questions, also your wins. I want your wins. I want a lot. Okay, I want a lot. 

Brad Crowell 42:09  

Yeah. We want it all. 

Lesley Logan 42:10  

Yes, I can't I'm not gonna sing a song for you. Until next time, Be It Till You See It. 

Brad Crowell 42:14  

Bye for now. 

Lesley Logan 42:16  

That's all I got for this episode of the Be It Till You See It Podcast. One thing that would help both myself and future listeners is for you to rate the show and leave a review and follow or subscribe for free wherever you listen to your podcast. Also, make sure to introduce yourself over at the Be It Pod on Instagram. I would love to know more about you. Share this episode with whoever you think needs to hear it. Help us and others Be It Till You See It. Have an awesome day. Be It Till You See It is a production of The Bloom Podcast Network. If you want to leave us a message or a question that we might read on another episode, you can text us at +1-310-905-5534 or send a DM on Instagram @BeItPod.

Brad Crowell 42:59  

It's written, filmed, and recorded by your host, Lesley Logan, and me, Brad Crowell.

Lesley Logan 43:03  

It is transcribed, produced and edited by the epic team at Disenyo.co.

Brad Crowell 43:08  

Our theme music is by Ali at Apex Production Music and our branding by designer and artist, Gianfranco Cioffi.

Lesley Logan 43:15  

Special thanks to Melissa Solomon for creating our visuals.

Brad Crowell 43:18  

Also to Angelina Herico for adding all of our content to our website. And finally to Meridith Root for keeping us all on point and on time.

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