Deep Dive with Ali Abdaal

Alonement: How To Be Alone And Happy - Francesca Specter


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Most of us find it increasingly difficult to be ok in our own company, which isn’t helped our tendency to autopilot to scrolling Twitter or Instagram on our phones to fill the moments we find ourselves alone. Francesca Specter is a podcast host and author of Alonement: How To Be Alone And Absolutely Own It, who is building a community that celebrates the transformative power of spending time alone. In the conversation we talk about why as humans we naturally place greater importance on social skills over solitude skills, why alonement is needed in our daily lives, how to turn loneliness into positive solitude, and much more. Enjoy :)

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(00:00) Intro
(01:27) Your personal development journey with alone time
(11:42) Blogging vs journaling about your thoughts
(18:57) Why we struggle to be alone with ourselves
(22:47) Our tendency to be needy
(28:00) The concept of Alonement and intentionality
(33:50) Social skills vs solo skills
(37:59) Emotional regulation
(40:04) What should someone do during Alonement?
(50:54) What's it like to live alone?
(53:42) Acknowledging the self vs surrendering to the collective
(58:25) Together alone time in relationships
(01:07:30) Fun and work aren’t dichotomous
(01:16:36) The problem with ā€˜should’
(01:23:13) Dealing with career anxiety

šŸ”— CONNECT WITH FRANCESCA

šŸ“• Alonement: How To Be Alone And Absolutely Own It
šŸŽ™Alonement Podcast
šŸ’Œ Subscribe to Francesca's newsletter, The Shoulds
🐦 Twitter
šŸ“ø Instagram

šŸ”— CONNECT WITH ALI

šŸŽ„ YouTube Channel
šŸ’» Website
šŸ“øĀ  Instagram
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šŸ‘„ Linkedin

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Find the show notes and the transcript on the website: https://aliabdaal.com/podcast/


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