Breaking the Grip - Finding Faith and Freedom from Toxic People

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Have you ever wondered why narcissists never seem to face the consequences for their actions?

It seems like they just skate through life using, abusing, and manipulating people without so much as a slap on the wrist. What if I told you that God actually has a plan for dealing with narcissists—even your narcissist? And it doesn’t involve you getting stuck in the mud with them.

That’s why today, I want to share with you the biblical proof that God has a strategy to handle these problematic people. By the end of our time together, you’ll clearly see how His plan will bring you the peace you desire and the justice they deserve.

Before we dive into the scripture that will forever change how you see God's justice, I want you to come with me while I get my laundry done. No, I’m not multitasking on you. I’m actually here to share that God’s justice works a lot like this washing machine.

You see, if you’re like me, your laundry is a mixture of dirty, not-so-dirty, and downright disgusting clothes. We throw them all together in one big bin, turn it on, and then check on it every three minutes...

Of course not. We walk away and let it do its thing. That is my hope today, that you will just let God do His thing. In other words, let God be God.

So, while we’re waiting, we can go back, grab a cup of tea, and chat.

The Scripture That Will Forever Change How You See God's Justice

It’s found in the book of Psalms, chapter 37. Shall we start in verse 1?

Psalm 37:1-2

"Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away."

We could park there for half a day, but let’s keep going.

They will soon fade—proof that the Lord is sovereign and knows what He’s doing. Proof that the Lord will not allow this to go on forever, even when it doesn’t look like it. You may be asking, "Lord, where are you? Do you not see what this person is doing to me? Do you not see how they hurt me?"

It’s easy to fret and be envious—not envious as in wanting what they have—but struggling because they don’t seem to struggle the way you do. You want it to stop. You want a healthy, loving relationship. But my friend, that ship has sailed. So now the focus is justice (and if you’re being honest, vengeance). Maybe you don’t need to see harm come to this person, but you are tired of there seeming to be no consequences in their life.

Every little move they make becomes your focus: every sin against you, every lie they tell, every self-centered, manipulative move. You keep adding it to the bank of bitterness. Before you know it, you’ve taken the enemy’s bait, and he has you right where he wants you.

I know, I’ve been there. You pray for two minutes for this person, then go on for two hours about what they’ve done. The thoughts rail in your mind for hours and days until it’s all you can think about. That’s why you think the solution is to just get away from this person. But I’m telling you there is another solution.

The Solution to Seeing Justice Served and Regaining Your Peace

It doesn’t involve selling your soul and forfeiting your peace to do it. So what are you supposed to do? Is it possible that God just wants us to sit back and do nothing?

Psalm 37:3 

"Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. 

Should You Endure Abuse?

You might be asking, "Kris, are you saying that I should stay and endure abuse?"  “Is that what it means to ‘do good’?

 NO. 

But if it’s uncomfortable, if there seems to be no way out, if there seems to be no change, no justice, no

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Grab your FREE Toxic People Survival Guide

https://krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide

Grab your FREE Toxic People Survival Guide

https://krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide

FREE Toxic People Survival Guide
https://krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide

Have you ever felt like someone in your life is constantly dragging you down, leaving you mentally and emotionally drained? You can’t quite put your finger on it, but you hate feeling this way about them. Yet, you can’t deny that this person just isn’t good for you. If you’re battling these conflicting feelings, you’re not alone – and you might be dealing with it right now.

So you might be wondering… if these demonic individuals can appear so ‘normal’ while causing so much chaos, how can you possibly identify them?

Look, we all know to walk away from toxic people and party animals, but what about those who deceive you into thinking they’re positive? The real issue with these individuals is that their positivity only shines when it comes to negative things. They only encourage you and seem happy with you when you partake in their destructive behaviors. Misery loves company, after all.

The Story of Troy:

But first, it’s crucial to understand HOW these demonic forces infiltrate your life.

Let’s take a lesson from the legendary city of Troy. Renowned for its impenetrable walls, Troy fell victim to a cunning Greek plan after a long siege. The Greeks constructed a massive wooden horse, hid a select group of warriors inside, and pretended to abandon the siege, leaving the horse as a deceptive gift. The Trojans, believing they had won, brought the horse into their fortified city.

When night fell, the hidden Greek soldiers emerged, opened the gates for the rest of their troops, and completely conquered Troy from within.

THIS is EXACTLY how Satan operates. His mission is to kill, steal, and destroy. Before you think, “Oh, I don’t give in to Satan,” be careful; you might be giving in to one of his ‘gifts.’ 

If the devil can’t get to you directly, he’ll send a narcissist.

That’s why so many Christians are being fooled by these wolves in sheep’s clothing, applying a Pollyanna mentality and getting slaughtered. And this isn’t a five-minute mistake; the repercussions can last years – even a lifetime.

So you may be wondering, if these demonic people look ‘normal’ and can wreak that much havoc, how can you identify them?

Here are the signs to spot and walk away from toxic people!

Sign #1: Encourages You to Sin

We all sin and fall short of the glory of God, but godly people will call you out to bring you to repentance and restoration.

People sent by the devil, however, will actually encourage you in bad behaviors. And it’s subtle. 

We know to avoid negative people, but what about those who fool you into believing they’re positive? The problem is, they’re only positive about the negative. They only encourage and are happy with you when you join them in their destructive behaviors.

That’s because sinners love company. 1 Corinthians 15:33 warns, “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals.'”

These devil-sent ambassadors only celebrate when you do something wrong, with encouragement like “Good for you, I’m proud of you!” after you just drank too much or told off your boss.

They might say, “It’s normal… it’s only natural… wouldn’t God want you to be happy? YOLO.”

If you resist, they’ll attack you with sayings like, “You’re such a self-righteous stick in the mud… always a buzzkill.”

These people often appear as charismatic, fun-loving individuals, seeming like everything you’ve been praying for, but in reality, they’re on a mission to drag you down with them.

Sign #2: Manipulation and Control

This sign is likely one you’ve endured on countless occasions, and not only ignored but blamed yourself for. It’s because their twisted motives are cunning and hard to spot.

If you’ve ever been told your feelings aren’t reality, had you

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Have you ever been so fed up with a narcissist's behavior that you just wanted to call them out, tell them off, and expose their lies? Hold on! 

Before you take that leap, you need to know something crucial. What if I told you that calling out a narcissist will backfire in ways you never imagined? In this blog, we’re diving deep into why confronting them is a bad idea, what they’re likely to do in response, and the surprising alternative God has for you. 

But first, I want to share a story about Brenda. Brenda came to me years ago, overwhelmed by the realization that not only was her mother manipulative, but her 32-year-old daughter exhibited severe narcissistic traits. For years, Brenda believed her mother’s lies, thinking she was damaged and disrespectful. She took on the responsibility of trying to make her daughter more respectful and appreciative, never realizing the true nature of their behaviors.

When Brenda finally understood what was really happening, she was ready to confront both her mother and her daughter. With her daughter, she wanted to share what she had learned about narcissism, hoping to open her eyes and stop the abuse. But with her mother, Brenda was done. She was fed up with the lies and the blame that she had suffered her entire life. She saw through her mother's manipulative, gaslighting tactics and was determined to let her know she was onto her.

“She’ll have no choice but to stop once she knows I’m onto her,” Brenda told me confidently. “Brenda, are you sure about that?” I asked. “Yes, why wouldn’t I be? Now I know, and she needs to know that I know,” she insisted.

Despite my advice to proceed cautiously, Brenda confronted both her mother and her daughter. She was loving but firm, ready to set the boundaries she had rehearsed in her mind for a week. But then, something unexpected happened. Both discussions spiraled into a toxic quagmire, leaving Brenda drained, confused, and feeling out of control.

“What went wrong?” she asked me, bewildered. “I was loving with my daughter and firm with my mother. What happened? It’s like it backfired on me.”

I kept my mouth shut with the thought "I tried to warn you" lingering in my mind. Brenda’s situation is, unfortunately, all too common.

Whether your narcissist is a conniving coworker, a manipulative mother, an entitled child, or a childish spouse...

You've likely reached a point where you finally have a name for what you've been experiencing. You finally understand that their behavior is just as destructive as you sensed it was. You're done beating yourself up and you're ready to call it out. You're ready to call out the lies, the inconsistencies, the exaggerations, the half-truths, the manipulations... You're done holding it in. If there's any hope for them to change, if there's any hope to keep your sanity, you feel you have to say something.

Maybe you simply want to point out the contradictions in their stories so you can both finally get on the same page. Maybe they consistently say one thing one day and the complete opposite the next. Maybe your husband blames you for him having to work so hard, despite how many times you’ve begged him to retire because “he loves what he does.” So you ask, which is it… you love what you do, or you're doing this because I’m making you? The truth is, the answer is whatever suits that moment, whatever makes them look like the hero and the victim. Neither is true and both are true. But since they can’t take responsibility for themselves an

FREE Toxic People Survival Guide
https://krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide

Conquering Codependency Biblically Online Course
https://krisreece.com/conquering-codependency/

FREE Toxic People Survival Guide
https://krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide

Conquering Codependency Biblically Online Coursehttps://krisreece.com/conquering-codependency/

Do you ever wonder how some people are able to handle toxic, evil people with such grace, while others constantly get sucked into the drama?
Join me as we dive into how wise Christians handle narcissists.  

FREE Toxic People Survival Guide
https://krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide

Conquering Codependency Biblically Online Course
https://krisreece.com/conquering-codependency/

Are you ready to expose those wolves in sheep's clothing?  Join me as we dive into the 5 clues to spot a 'christian' narcissist.

FREE Toxic People Survival Guide
https://krisreece.com/toxic-people-survival-guide

Conquering Codependency Biblically Online Course
https://krisreece.com/conquering-codependency/