Conversations from the Heart

What do you do when you’ve poured your heart into being a better parent, and your adult child still keeps you at arm’s length?

In today’s heartfelt (and heart-heavy) coaching conversation, we sit with Josie: a mother navigating the complex grief of feeling used, dismissed, and emotionally exiled by her daughter. 

Despite years of inner work and a deep desire to connect, Josie finds herself hurt and unsure: Should she take space? Should she block her daughter’s messages? Is silence a form of self-care, or a veiled cry to be rescued?

Together, we untangle the knot between boundaries and punishment, help her find clarity around her deeper intentions, and explore how unmet childhood needs can hijack our adult relationships. Whether you’re a parent, a child, or both, this episode will speak to the ache of misalignment and the courage it takes to stay rooted in love while protecting your own heart.

In this episode:

•How to discern the difference between setting a boundary and delivering a covert ultimatum

•Why “taking space” sometimes carries unspoken hopes for change, and how to separate them

•The ache of being the family scapegoat, even after decades of healing

•Navigating the painful realization: Nobody else sees me the way my children do.

•A metaphor for overexposure to painful dynamics: The emotional sunburn

•Why it’s essential to tend to your inner child before asking others to meet your unmet needs

•Sample scripts for taking space with clarity, not punishment

•The real purpose of pausing contact: and how to do it with integrity

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

When the world of healing turns out to be more political than personal, more performative than compassionate, what do you do?

In this episode, we explore a powerful, vulnerable question from Katie, a listener discerning whether to pursue psychology as a profession. What unfolds is part mentorship, part memoir, and a whole lot of honest reflection on the tangled terrain of becoming a healer inside complex systems.

I share a bit of my own journey through graduate school, toxic professional cultures, disillusionment with insurance models, and the soul-stretching cost, both financial and emotional, of pursuing clinical licensure as a single mother in my 40s.

But this conversation isn’t just about psychology. It’s about discernment. It’s about staying connected to your deeper “yes” when fear, fatigue, and broken systems threaten to drown it out.

Whether you’re an aspiring therapist, a burnt-out practitioner, or simply someone trying to live with more integrity and heart, this episode is for you.

Listener Takeaways:

•Why disillusionment in helping professions is not a sign you’re broken, it’s a call for deeper discernment.

•How to honor your “yes” even when fear and power dynamics swirl.

•Why finding your people is just as important as finding your profession.

•The real cost of licensure, and what to consider before taking on debt.

•What it looks like to stay within a system without losing yourself in it.

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

What do you do when you’re ready for kids… and your partner isn’t?

In this deeply honest episode, we explore one of the most tender crossroads in long-term partnership: what happens when your longing to become a parent collides with your partner’s hesitation, fear, or quiet refusal?

You’ll hear from a caller who is wrestling with the heartbreak of being in a beautiful, joyful relationship—except for one major misalignment. Together, we unpack the emotional tension, the grief, the fear of future regret, and the difficult questions that follow:

•How do you talk about children when you’re not on the same page?

•Can you name a boundary without issuing an ultimatum?

•How do you wait without betraying yourself?

This conversation doesn’t offer neat answers—but it does offer a roadmap for staying honest, kind, and courageous in the face of relational uncertainty.

Stay through to the end for practical tools, boundary scripts, and a bit of self-reflection on what I might have done even better as a facilitator.

Show Notes

In this episode, we explore:

•What to do when one partner wants kids and the other is unsure

•The difference between a boundary and an ultimatum

•How to reveal what’s true for you without shaming someone else’s pace

•The risks of toxic hope and the beauty of generative patience

•Why shared grief can be a path back to connection

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

What do you do when something important is broken—but the people behind it are doing their best?

In this episode, Jen is preparing to talk to a reporter about a youth program she deeply supports—and is deeply frustrated with. She wants change. She wants honesty. But she doesn’t want to shame or vilify the people running the program.

Together, we explore how to speak truth to systemic breakdowns with clarity, compassion, and courage. You’ll hear us move through raw anger, heartfelt grief, and into honest, values-aligned language that invites collaboration instead of defensiveness.

If you’ve ever tried to advocate for change without becoming the villain—or longed to tell the truth without betraying your heart—this conversation is for you.

In this episode:

•How to speak publicly about system failures without turning people into enemies

•The vital role of anger, grief, and heartbreak in values-based leadership

•How to stay self-connected when preparing to give hard feedback

•Scripts and language tools for telling the truth with dignity

•The emotional intelligence needed to shift from blame to collaboration

•How to transform outrage into a relational invitation for change

•What to do when both sides of the conflict are hurting and hopeful

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

What does it actually look like to live in peace without bypassing truth, collapsing boundaries, or avoiding complexity?

In this episode, I share six powerful principles for peaceful living, not as moral prescriptions, but as relational practices rooted in the universal human needs that live inside all of us. You’ll learn how to stay grounded in love and discernment, how to co-create mutual thriving, and how to repair ruptures with clarity and care.

This conversation weaves together personal, relational, and systemic insight, offering a wise, trauma-informed, and deeply humane guide to living peace in everyday moments.

In this episode, we’ll explore:

•How to respect sovereignty without detaching

•Why control is not compassion

•When and how to speak truth with care

•What justice looks like in mutual, needs-based relationships

•How to repair without rushing

•Why paradox is the hallmark of relational maturity

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

Why do some people leave you feeling small, confused, or ashamed, even though they smile, laugh, and seem perfectly nice?

In this powerful coaching conversation, Jaya explores what happens when charm and condescension hide behind friendly facades. Together, we name the impact of what I call narcissistic fallout: the lingering disorientation that surfaces when unresolved trauma meets relational manipulation.

We explore:

•Why some conversations feel like being hypnotized

•The nervous system effects of subtle emotional control

•How to spot power moves disguised as “concern”

•What to say (and how to exit) when someone laughs at your pain

•The inner work of breaking free from spells of confusion and control

You’ll leave this episode with:

•Practical language to protect your power

•A somatic metaphor to stay grounded (the oak tree)

•A gentle reminder that your grief holds your clarity

This is an episode for anyone reclaiming their voice after emotional gaslighting or enmeshment, and learning to walk away from people who don’t feel safe in their nervous system.

 SHOW NOTES

•[03:10] How past trauma shows up in confusing conversations

•[07:20] What is “narcissistic fallout” and how does it hijack your power?

•[10:15] Why charming people can leave you feeling ashamed

•[14:30] Practical phrases to interrupt manipulation mid-conversation

•[20:50] “The porcupine and the ring” — a metaphor for protecting yourself

•[22:00] The Jungle Book python & the hypnotic quality of old patterns

•[26:40] What to do when you keep trying to be liked by people who harm you

•[32:10] How to support your inner teenager during relational triggers

•[37:00] Somatic tools for staying rooted in your power

•[39:00] Sample exit scripts you can use to protect your nervous system

Resources & Links:

•Join the Truth Over Comfort live workshop on August 14th (6–8pm CST): Register here.

•Free Communication Starter Kit

•Learn more about the Conversations from the Heart Membership Program

Loved this episode?

•Subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify

•Share it with a friend who’s navigating confusing relational dynamics

•Sign up for my weekly newsletter at yvetteerasmus.com for more emotional wisdom & tools

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

In this episode, I coach a listener named Julia who feels dismissed after bringing up a difficult experience in therapy. Her therapist tried to normalize it by offering logic instead of empathy and now Julia’s wondering how to bring it up without creating conflict or being misunderstood again.

Together, we explore:

•How to ask for more empathy in therapy (without blaming or shaming)

•What it means when a therapist skips emotional attunement

•A gentle script you can use when therapy feels misaligned

•What to do if your therapist can’t or won’t meet you where you are

If you’ve ever walked away from therapy feeling more alone than connected, this episode offers tools, language, and hope.

Stay till the end for a practical how-to guide on navigating these tough moments. Because asking for what you need in therapy is often the most healing work you’ll ever do.

In this episode:

• [02:00] How do I tell my therapist she didn’t really hear me?
• [04:00] The difference between empathy and normalization
• [07:00] When therapists fix too fast, and why it hurts
• [09:00] A script to name misattunement without escalation
• [12:00] How the therapy relationship becomes the real work
• [14:00] Post-session how-to guide: 6 steps to naming what’s not working in 

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

What do you do when someone you care about paints you as the villain?

Maybe you spoke your truth, and they called it manipulation.

Maybe you set a boundary, and they called it narcissism.

Maybe you asked for something you needed, and they said you lied.

In this raw, real, and emotionally honest episode, Yvette walks two callers through the heartbreak and confusion that comes when our intentions are misunderstood and our character is questioned.

We talk about:

* How to respond with clarity and compassion when someone accuses you of lying or narcissism

* What an apology actually means, and how to offer one without self-erasing

* The difference between empathy and enabling (especially with adult children)

* Scripts for repair conversations when the other person won’t talk to you

* How to protect your nervous system while still keeping your heart open

If you’ve ever been stuck between wanting to make things right and needing to stay safe, this one’s for you.

Stay till the end for:

* A word-for-word apology template you can adapt to your own life

* How to spot the real need underneath an accusation

* Why the most generous thing you can do… might be walking away

Listen now and discover how to stay in your truth and your tenderness—even when someone else can’t see who you really are.

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

What if joy isn’t the absence of discomfort, but something we can feel even in the thick of it?

In this episode of Conversations from the Heart, I speak with three brave callers, each grappling with the tension between what they feel and how they long to show up. From emotional resentment in a professional friendship, to the struggle to be kind and also firm, to standing up to power without collapsing in fear, these conversations are raw, real, and deeply human.

We explore how to:

•Navigate mixed feelings without needing to clean them up or figure them out.

•Stay connected to yourself in moments of not-knowing.

•Reclaim your voice without abandoning your values.

•Recognize when you’re operating from self-trust and when you’re just coping.

•Use healthy anger to build connection rather than break it down.

Whether you’re floundering in a relationship, feeling dismissed in a conversation, or being shamed for speaking truth to power … this episode invites you back to yourself.

Spoiler: It’s possible to feel at peace even in the middle of the mess. Not by fixing it, but by being in honest relationship with it.

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

In this episode, we listen as Nate opens with a deeply human inquiry:

What can I do to feel more regulated, more considerate, and less internally violent while driving?

What unfolds is a rich exploration of road rage, internalized judgment, overstimulation, and the longing for care in a world that often feels aggressively indifferent. The conversation weaves together Nonviolent Communication, inner child work, trauma-informed insight, and the power of spiritual reframing.

Takeaways:

• Driving can surface deep, unconscious wounds about safety, visibility, and being cared for.
• There’s a difference between coping with a dysregulating world and designing a life that actually supports you.
• The wish to be “unaffected” is often a defensive maneuver to avoid overwhelm or pain,but true regulation requires learning how to metabolize life, not numb to it.
• “Right and wrong” can become tyrannical ideas when inherited from domination systems. Replacing them with “what meets needs” offers deeper integrity.
• Empathy begins by reclaiming your relationship with your own interior world.
• Everything (yes, even rush hour) can become a spiritual dojo.

Want more direct access to me? I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection. 

Join regular live calls where students in the school bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube