Counselling Tutor podcast

In episode 348 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week's three topics:

• Firstly in 'Ethical, Sustainable Practice', we look at the barriers to diversity in supervision – exploring the importance of cultural attunement, honesty, and managing bias.
• Then in 'Practice Matters', Rory speaks with Chris Metcalfe and Kent Riley from iMatta – a practice management platform for therapists looking to streamline their admin and protect client data.
• And lastly in 'Student Services', we discuss how non-judgement can be more than a counselling condition – it can become a valuable way of living.

In Episode 347 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week's three topics:

• Firstly, in 'Ethical, Sustainable Practice', we explore why autism-informed therapy matters and how inclusivity, legal responsibilities, and lived experience come together to strengthen practice.
• Then in 'Practice Matters', Rory speaks with Aisha Gordon-Hiles about financial resilience for counsellors. They look at the importance of sustainable fees, ethical pricing, and developing a healthy money mindset to support private practice.
• And finally in 'Student Services', Rory and Ken reflect on why counselling trainees often doubt themselves – and how reframing these doubts can support deeper learning and professional growth.

In Episode 346 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week's three topics:

• Firstly, in 'Ethical, Sustainable Practice', they explore trauma-informed practice, focusing specifically on triangulation and trauma — how this hidden dynamic shows up in therapy and why recognising it is vital for working safely and effectively with clients.
• Then in 'Practice Matters', Rory speaks with Mel Ciavucco, a counsellor, trainer, and specialist in domestic abuse, about her new CPD lecture, Domestic Abuse Awareness. They discuss working with both survivors and perpetrators, how coercive control operates, and the importance of understanding abuse through an intersectional lens.
• And finally, in 'Student Services', Rory and Ken explore why formal counselling training includes a full year focused entirely on counselling skills. They explain how these foundational skills form the bedrock of all therapeutic work and how they support students in becoming confident, competent practitioners.

Domestic Abuse Awareness – Why a Year of Skills Training Matters

In Episode 346 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week’s three topics:

Firstly, in ‘Ethical, Sustainable Practice’, they explore trauma-informed practice, focusing specifically on triangulation and trauma — how this hidden dynamic shows up in therapy and why recognising it is vital for working safely and effectively with clients.

Then in ‘Practice Matters’, Rory speaks with Mel Ciavucco, a counsellor, trainer, and specialist in domestic abuse, about her new CPD lecture, Domestic Abuse Awareness. They discuss working with both survivors and perpetrators, how coercive control operates, and the importance of understanding abuse through an intersectional lens.

And finally, in ‘Student Services’, Rory and Ken explore why formal counselling training includes a full year focused entirely on counselling skills. They explain how these foundational skills form the bedrock of all therapeutic work and how they support students in becoming confident, competent practitioners.

Triangulation and Trauma [starts at 03:49 mins]

In this section, Rory and Ken explore triangulation and trauma, highlighting how this relational dynamic is often rooted in childhood experiences.

Key points discussed include:

Triangulation involves bringing a third party into a relationship to manage tension or avoid conflict.

It can result in anxiety, hidden trauma, and ongoing relational difficulties if not recognised and addressed.

Clients may unconsciously replay triangulation dynamics in therapy, such as trying to get the therapist to “side” with them.

Working through triangulation requires consistency, boundaries, and an understanding of attachment repair.

Therapists should avoid prematurely disrupting these dynamics without fully understanding their protective role.

Domestic Abuse Awareness [starts at 32:58 mins]

In this week’s ‘Practice Matters’, Rory speaks with Mel Ciavucco, who draws from years of experience working with domestic abuse survivors and perpetrators.

Key points from this conversation include:

Mel’s CPD lecture explores coercive control, stalking, spiritual abuse, and honor-based violence.

Neurodivergence (like ADHD or autism) can sometimes contribute to harmful behaviours, though not excuse them.

Perpetrator work is focused on supporting survivors by addressing the root causes of abuse.

Therapists often fear working with perpetrators - but change is possible with the right approach and supervision.

The Jane Monckton Smith homicide timeline is introduced as a powerful tool for risk assessment and understanding escalation.

An intersectional approach is vital - Mel speaks about LGBTQ+ clients, gender-based violence, and inclusive practice.

Why a Year of Skills Training Matters [starts at 1:04:38 mins]

In this section, Rory and Ken explain the rationale behind dedicating an entire year of counselling training to developing core counselling skills.

Key points include:

Skills like active listening, reflection, and silence are often life-changing for students - not just for therapy, but in everyday relationships.

Practicing these skills in triads helps students build confidence and competence before entering clinical work.

These are advanced communication tools that improve personal and professional interactions across the board.

Active listening helps us respond with understanding rather than advice or opinion.

Silence, used well, can open space for deeper expression and processing.

These foundational skills support the therapeutic relationship - where most healing takes place.

Links and Resources

Mel Ciavucco

Counselling Skills Academy

Advanced Certificate in Counselling Supervision

Basic Counselling Skills: A Student Guide

Counsellor CPD

Counselling Study Resource

In Episode 345 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week's three topics:

• Firstly, in 'Ethical, Sustainable Practice', we examine working with rehearsed material with Sarah Henry. How to identify it, what it means for the therapeutic relationship, and ethical ways to respond.
• Then in 'Practice Matters', Rory speaks with Laura Davies, who shares her personal experience of navigating perimenopause while working as a therapist, offering insights into how it affected her practice and ways she adapted.
• And finally in 'Student Services', Rory and Ken do a deep dive into the counselling skill of reflection. How it works, when to use it, and the important role it plays in helping clients connect with their emotions.

Perimenopause and Therapist Identity - Counselling Skills: A Deeper Look at Reflection

In Episode 345 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week’s three topics:

Firstly, in ‘Ethical, Sustainable Practice’, we examine working with rehearsed material with Sarah Henry. How to identify it, what it means for the therapeutic relationship, and ethical ways to respond.

Then in ‘Practice Matters’, Rory speaks with Laura Davies, who shares her personal experience of navigating perimenopause while working as a therapist, offering insights into how it affected her practice and ways she adapted.

And finally, in ‘Student Services’, Rory and Ken do a deep dive into the counselling skill of reflection. How it works, when to use it, and the important role it plays in helping clients connect with their emotions.

Working with Rehearsed Material [starts at 03:28 mins]

In this section, Rory and Ken discuss how some clients bring emotionally detached, well-practised narratives into therapy.

Key points discussed include:

Working with rehearsed material often shows up with high fluency but low emotional expression.

It can serve as a protective mechanism, a service-shaped narrative, or a way to test the therapist’s response.

Ethical practice involves patience, not forcing emotion, and recognising this material as a valid part of the client’s process.

Micro-interventions such as body-based check-ins, sensory prompts, and careful use of immediacy can gently encourage emotional connection.

Sarah Henry offers a practice-based view of how clients use rehearsed stories early in therapy to build trust and test emotional safety.

Perimenopause and Therapist Identity [starts at 41:15 mins]

In this week’s ‘Practice Matters’, Rory speaks with counsellor Laura Davis about her personal experience of perimenopause and how it impacted her therapeutic presence.

Key points from the conversation include:

Laura describes experiencing brain fog mid-session and questioning her capacity as a therapist.

She talks about adapting her practice - tracking symptoms, working more relationally, and using creative methods.

The emotional impact of shifting identity during menopause, including fears about professional competence.

Ethical considerations around disclosure to clients and maintaining trust in the therapeutic relationship.

The importance of workplace support, supervision, and societal openness around menopause.

Counselling Skills: A Deeper Look at Reflection [starts at 01:08:23 mins]

In this section, Rory and Ken take a deep dive into the skill of reflection, one of the core counselling skills used to help clients access and understand their emotions.

Key points include:

Reflection bridges the story (narrative) with the emotion underneath.

Types of reflection: content, emotional, and meaning-based.

Reflection helps counsellors check attunement and gives clients space to name and explore feelings.

It should be avoided in situations involving risk assessment, contracting, or when responding to clear client questions.

Students are encouraged to develop this skill through journaling, feedback, and supervision.

Links and Resources

Counselling Skills Academy

Advanced Certificate in Counselling Supervision

Basic Counselling Skills: A Student Guide

Counsellor CPD

Counselling Study Resource

Counselling Theory in Practice: A Student Guide

Counselling Tutor Training and CPD

Facebook group

Website

Online and Telephone Counselling: A Practitioner’s Guide

Online and Telephone Counselling Course

In Episode 344 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week's topics:

• Firstly, in 'Ethical, Sustainable Practice', we look at the ethical use of AI in therapy, highlighting potential risks and ethical responsibilities.
• Then in 'Practice Matters', Rory speaks with Caroline Evers Endicott about her lecture Introducing Therapy for Addiction - a vital area of practice that's often underrepresented in core training.
• And finally, in 'Student Services', Rory and Ken discuss how learning never stops in counselling - and why planning your CPD is essential as you qualify and build your therapeutic career.

Introducing Therapy for Addiction - Learning Never Stops – Planning Your CPD

In Episode 344 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week’s topics:

Firstly, in ‘Ethical, Sustainable Practice’, we look at the ethical use of AI in therapy, highlighting potential risks and ethical responsibilities.

Then in ‘Practice Matters’, Rory speaks with Caroline Evers Endicott about her lecture Introducing Therapy for Addiction - a vital area of practice that’s often underrepresented in core training.

And finally, in ‘Student Services’, Rory and Ken discuss how learning never stops in counselling - and why planning your CPD is essential as you qualify and build your therapeutic career.

Ethical Use of AI in Therapy [starts at 03:34 mins]

Ken Kelly, joined by his digital twin “DigiKen,” opens the episode by exploring the ethical use of AI in therapy—how it's quietly being integrated into practice, and the serious questions it raises.

Key points of this section include:

AI tools such as scheduling apps, transcription software, or marketing generators are already present in most practices.

Many of these tools are hosted on international servers and may not comply with UK GDPR or ethical standards.

Therapists must assess whether any digital tool:

Complies with UK data laws.

Has adequate encryption and security.

Aligns with professional ethics.

Stores client data securely.

While AI should never replace the therapeutic relationship, it can support therapists with non-clinical tasks like admin, marketing, or web design.

Introducing Therapy for Addiction [starts at 23:23 mins]

In this week’s Practice Matters, Rory speaks with Caroline Evers Endicott about working with addiction and her CPD lecture Introducing Therapy for Addiction.

Key points from the discussion:

Addiction is a stigmatised mental health condition and is often overlooked in standard counselling training.

Many clients present with anxiety, trauma, or depression before disclosing addiction later in therapy.

Therapists are encouraged not to immediately refer clients on but to recognise the skills they already possess.

Therapist tools Caroline highlights include:

Person-centred skills: empathy, non-judgement, trust building.

Modalities such as CBT, DBT, Motivational Interviewing, and Mindfulness.

Understanding clients’ use of substances as a way to self-regulate or self-medicate unresolved trauma or neurodivergence.

Caroline also explores:

The value of self-reflection for therapists working with addiction.

Recovery pathways including 12-step, SMART Recovery, and CBT-informed models.

The importance of understanding your clients holistically and not reducing them to “just an addict”.

Learning Never Stops – Planning Your CPD [starts at 51:24 mins]

In this final Student Services of the season, Rory and Ken discuss how to make the most of your academic break by planning your continued professional development (CPD).

Key points include:

Graduates often face barriers in employment without additional training (e.g. trauma-informed work or online therapy).

CPD should balance:

Ethics – e.g. being trauma-informed helps you work safely with complex presentations.

Sustainability – e.g. online therapy training increases employability and client access.

Choose CPD based on:

Clear learning outcomes.

Practical application of skills.

Client needs you’re most likely to encounter.

Ken and Rory encourage newly qualified therapists to:

Reflect on gaps in their training.

Focus on real-world skills they can use in the therapy room.

Avoid overloading themselves - CPD should feel purposeful and empowering.

Links and Resources

Critical Thinking Matrix for AI in Therapy

Counselling Skills Academy

Advanced Certificate in Counselling Supervision

In Episode 343 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week's three topics:

• Firstly, in 'Ethical, Sustainable Practice', they explore the importance of having an online and telephone informed supervisor when you work in this way.
• Then in 'Practice Matters', Rory speaks with Sarah Henry about her concept of race and everyday friction - how these subtle, often hidden experiences shape identity and create barriers in life and therapy.
• And finally in 'Student Services', Rory and Ken discuss the significance of ending well in counselling training - how to navigate goodbyes with your peers and why these endings matter in your development.

Race and Everyday Friction – Ending Well in Counselling Training

In Episode 343 of the Counselling Tutor Podcast, your hosts Rory Lees-Oakes and Ken Kelly take us through this week’s three topics:

Firstly, in ‘Ethical, Sustainable Practice’, they explore the importance of having an online and telephone informed supervisor when you work in this way.

Then in ‘Practice Matters’, Rory speaks with Sarah Henry about her concept of race and everyday friction - how these subtle, often hidden experiences shape identity and create barriers in life and therapy.

And finally in ‘Student Services’, Rory and Ken discuss the significance of ending well in counselling training - how to navigate goodbyes with your peers and why these endings matter in your development.

Why Have an Online and Telephone Informed Supervisor? [starts at 03:12 mins]

In this section, Rory and Ken unpack the ethical importance of having an online and telephone informed supervisor when you practice in these ways.

Key points discussed include:

Supervision is an ethical requirement to ensure your practice is safe, effective, and supportive of clients.

When working online or by phone, you need a supervisor who understands the specific challenges of these settings—like missing visual cues, managing silences, and the different technical considerations.

Formal training in online and telephone working is essential, as supervisors who lack this training might not be able to guide or support you fully.

Ethical frameworks (like the BACP’s) and supervision competencies in the UK highlight the need for supervisors to hold formal training in any special areas of practice.

Supervisors with this training will understand nuances like the disinhibition effect (when clients behave differently online) and data protection considerations.

Race and Everyday Friction [starts at 18:53 mins]

In this week’s ‘Practice Matters’, Rory speaks with Sarah Henry, a counsellor and trainer who explores the concept of everyday friction. Those small, often overlooked experiences of race that shape a person’s daily life.

Key points from this conversation include:

Everyday friction can be things like plasters (band-aids) that don’t match darker skin tones, or seeing few Black people on greeting cards - small examples of how whiteness is often the default in society.

These small frictions are constantly present and shape identity in powerful ways.

White people may not recognise these frictions because they are not impacted by them directly.

Conversations about race often start by talking about these everyday frictions - it’s how we build bridges and develop understanding.

Recognising and exploring these micro-moments of exclusion can help therapists be more attuned to the lived experiences of their clients.

Ending Well in Counselling Training [starts at 40:41 mins]

In this section, Rory and Ken share insights on ending well in your counselling course—whether you’re finishing a term, a module, or the whole course.

Key points include:

Good endings help to close the chapter, mark growth, and ensure no regrets are left behind.

Reflect on what you’ve shared and learned with your peers - acknowledge the support, challenges, and personal development.

If there have been tensions with others, consider repairing or at least acknowledging them to avoid unfinished business.

Remember that even if you see some peers in future courses, each group dynamic is unique. It’s important to close this chapter properly.

Taking time to end well helps you carry the experience forward as a positive part of your development.

Links and Resources

Counselling Skills Academy

Advanced Certificate in Counselling Supervision

Basic Counselling Skills: A Student Guide

Counsellor CPD

Counselling Study Resource

Counselling Theory in Practice: A Student Guide

Counselling Tutor Training and CPD